A collection of one shots!
Gifts for thatdoodlebug, my tumblr wife in the Christmas season. Randall and Sulley winter holiday interactions!
Some of these will be platonic, some not. This first one technically is.
AU. Each year for the winter holidays a group of monsters decided to have a meal together. Another part of the tradition is that two monsters are randomly selected to do most of the work. This year Sulley and Randall have been drawn from the hat- this can only end well.
(Technically platonic, but I think when it comes to the stress of winter holidays everyone starts to sound like an old married couple).
(A/N:I am also still working on family- things got complicated, but I hope to work on it and get a chapter out before Christmas!)
"Sleigh bells ring hmmm hmm hmm hmm"
Sulley pushed the trolley forwards and squinted at the list in the harsh artificial light of the store. It squeaked against the smooth and finished floor.
Like most stores it had music to fit the season as well as garish bits of tinsel and holly lining the many shelves (and even mistletoe, to which Sulley raised an eyebrow at and tried to side step every time he came across it).
He briefly grinned before deciding to stick a Santa hat on top of his head as well as antlers into the cart in front of him. He could imagine Randall's reaction to all this, and he tried not to laugh at the image of Rex and Joey utterly insisting he had to wear the damn things.
He felt he deserved a small token of revenge at the end of the day.
Stopping and pulling a large jar of cranberry sauce off the shelf he squinted at it as if it was a part of a serious interrogation, with deep secrets to unlock until he heard something he really didn't want to hear.
'Booty booty booty booty rocking everywhere...'
He stopped and felt himself blush as two female monsters holding their own baskets heaving with meats and vegetables started to laugh as the song continued.
"Mike." he thought to himself. "Stop changing my ringtone"
Not being the most adept at technology he still didn't know how to change it back to something else. He'd only bought the damn thing a month ago when Randall had insisted that they needed to be in constant communication if this whole thing was to go on without a hitch.
Randall as it happened had control issues. What a surprise.
He glanced at the number before answering all the same, though there was really no point.
"What now?" He said to himself.
'rocking everywhere rockin-'
"Hey Randall- hey when you said cranberry sauce did you mean the store brand or Mrs Betty's-"
"I SWEAR TO GOD SULLIVAN NEXT TIME I GET PICKED OUT OF THE HAT I'M MAKING EVERYONE GO VEGETARIAN."
Sulley really should have learned by now to hold the phone away from his ear immediately when answering it. He sighed and looked the phone at arms length now, with the steadied caution of a bomb expert who was all too used to this by now.
"What's wrong this time?" he asked with more patience when he pressed it back to the side of his head. This had been the third or fourth time he'd called him in the last half hour. Usually to make sure Sulley hadn't got lost in the condiment aisle or that he had got the exact thing he needed (not wanted- needed) on the list. Or to ask what the hell was taking so long.
(Sulley sometimes suspected Randall was just lonely and wanted someone to talk to. Voicing this theory got him a snap to shove it.)
"There's... there's guts in this thing." Randall said making a disgusted noise.
Sulley hesitated before answering.
"...Yes. And?"
"And I have to remove them." he said with barely repressed anger. Because how dare this bird which had sacrificed itself to be their meal do this to him.
"Look just hold on, I'll be there in like half an hour, I can do it if you want." He pushed the cart forwards again and looked thoughtfully at the pecan pie. Oh god, he was so hungry. He'd missed breakfast to do this.
"And get hair in it like Sanderson did the year before last?- No way Sullivan." He simply got in reply.
Randall was someone who remembered every last mistake a particular team had made over the years with ruthless efficiency. Something went wrong every year if they were honest with themselves. Though Sulley mostly remembered that, no matter what, everyone eventually had fun- even Randall who was somewhat of a grouch sometimes complete with a perky paper party hat.
"You really have to learn to relax Randall, it's the holidays."
"... you need to stop living with Wazowski." Randall muttered darkly. "I hate the holidays." he added and Sulley repressed sighing again, instead silently rolling his eyes as Randall rather predictably went off to rant.
"It's cold outside. Buying stupid presents and cards even for people you don't like. SNOW. Mistletoe in the hands of all the wrong monsters."
"It was just a kiss on the cheek Randall. He was just being nice."
"Fungus needs to learn to back off." This diversion didn't distract him from his rant. He immediately went back into it, not missing a beat. It was almost impressive.
"It's cold. Disastrous fashion sense suddenly becomes acceptable. The damn songs playing everywhere..."
Ah yes the songs, part of the reason Sulley was in the store instead.
"IT'S COLD OUTSIDE."
"Yes you mentioned that." he said glancing at the 'Free from' section.
"You are no help at all you damn furry... chump." he was coming dangerously close to whining at this stage and Sulley felt a small twinge of pity, even if it was really Randall's own fault he was biting off more then he could chew.
Randall had more or less said he would take over the kitchen and Sulley would be barred from it apart from more monotonous tasks like peeling potatoes. He'd more or less become the errand boy in all this being sent to buy random items (or well everything actually), Randall saying he didn't trust him to do anything beyond the heavy lifting or getting a particularly freshly slaughtered Turkey from an aunt of Sulley's who raised them just out of town. That was all he was good for apparently.
After all even the microwave seemed to explode if Sulley so much as looked at the thing funny. Randall was adamant that this year everything would be utterly perfect. He wasn't about to be blamed if something went horribly wrong.
"I'm getting wheat free flour for your cake and for the sauce." Sulley added in conversation as he did put some in the cart.
Randall snorted.
"Ugh. Why did Celia have to be Celiac. Did her parents have a damn sixth sense or something."
"Yes, and I'm sure Celia did it just to make your life difficult".
"Don't play smart with me Sullivan. I think you're a little out of your league." Randall snapped on edge again.
"Take a deep breath." Sulley said.
"Oh COME-"
"Randall." he said sternly.
He finally heard him comply on the phone. In and out.
"...Better?"
"Yes- EXCEPT I STILL HAVE TO GUT THIS DAMN TURKEY."
Sulley had to laugh, he could tell somehow, even though he was yelling he did feel a little bit better at least. Sulley leaned back, creaking his back a little as he did so, the phone still pressed against his head.
"Put it this way Randall. Mike and Celia managed to do it a few years back when it was their turn."
There was a very pregnant pause on the other end of the line.
"I am gutting this damn turkey if it kills me." He said in raw determination.
In actual fact, it had been Celia who had done it by herself. Mike had been far too grossed out by it to even think about it.
(In actual fact Mike had fainted.)
It was actually how the two had come to finally date... it had been an interesting scene in which to come back to. Just a year before that one meal Sulley had invited Randall to on a whim and that Randall had somehow agreed to come to- and he'd more or less become part of it ever since despite his own gripes and complaints. Ahh memories. Sulley had had to buy a new fire extinguisher the next day.
"Anything else you want from here?" He decided to finally ask after some silence.
"Just get your furry ass back here Sullivan, so you can sort the vegetables for tomorrow."
"Yes sir."
At this Randall snorted and finally rang off.
Sulley laughed himself as it happened.
They were so doomed. But things would work out. They usually did in his experience.