I was an ordinary girl I guess. Okay, not ordinary because no one was. I preferred to be weird cause I liked being weird. But either that to a person who may not know me to well would think of me as just another one girl in the school, one girl in the city, one girl in the county, one girl in the state, one girl in the country, one girl in the world, one girl out of zillions in the universe.

I longed for things I couldn't have like my own room in a bigger condo. And I was the person I wish I wasn't. I wanted to be someone totally not me! But I wasn't because that is have I shaped my life. Although I was in accelerated classes at school, I hate it. I wasn't "smart". I had to do homework to get an A. I needed to study my butt off for tests and still get bad grades. I sucked at school if you really thought about it. I hated PE also, so you could say I was lazy. Well I am fine being called lazy cause I know I am.

My thoughts on life isn't exactly "positive". So i think negative thoughts a lot!
My room was always messy cause i was too LAZY!

What i did like was to daydream and look on my thoughts on life. I loved to keep journals and write. I hated it when it was for school though. I mean cause there was all these spelling and grammar and punctuation. It made my head hurt like all the other school things.

My family just included me, my smart brother, and my mom. I always felt like i was different then the rest of my family. I mean i wasn't the best at school, i didn't do a sport or instrument, i was the only one who liked art, i liked pain and like that stuff cause it made me laugh although the grown ups besides my mom and dad (who doesn't live with us) think i am just innocent even though i am not. I am like the only one who seems to daydream and really wonder about things like that. I just knew i was different.
I wanted to live in a fantasy world. I wanted to go to an anime world or in a video game. My anime hottie was Gaara from Naruto. I had many others, but someone he seemed to be that one i will always remember and well...i don't know. I feel connected to him even though he is not real. Someone i always imagined he was and he was going to come someday.

Sometimes it made me sad when reality really hit and i realized he was from a TV show and he was never going to come, but i always pushed that aside.

But those were only in my daydreams. Mere fragments of my mind. Most of my head is cramped full of other school junk...maybe. I know i always have some story forming into my head and ideas, but i just never wrote it down or sometimes it just seemed better in my head than on paper. Or i was too lazy to write them down, but for the most part i remember it, but sometimes idea stories go bye bye. And that saddens me.

Life confuses me greatly. That is why i have a journal that i write down my observations on life and such. It's not that great, but it comes from my mind and that is all that matters to me.

I like being alone to think and go on my computer or such, but i learned that friends are important. Although sometimes i feel like it is useless to make some friends because you might not keep in touch, but others you know you will always be friends. I learned that. I mean i still have my friend ever since we were babies.

But sometimes i wouldn't care if a friend is mad at me. Sometimes i feel like that is okay, i don't need them anyways. My brother says i have a mental problem, but whatever. If he thinks that let him me. I don't care! I don't really care that much what people think of me. Some people I do care what they think of me.

I mean I am somewhat normal. My life sucks like everyone else's, I wish for things I can't, I have stupid crushes, and I keep way too many secrets. I mean I didn't even tell my friends I am an anime freak.

I love quotes and icons. I don't know why, but I have a journal for that too.
Yeah, I have a journal for like everything.

So that's me. The only thing I didn't tell you was my name. So let's make up a name using our imaginations. Let's name me Rin. How I look? Well, short black/brown hair that covers my right eye. Brown/black eyes. Height, just think of someone short for their age. I like to wear dark colors mostly. Also I am basically a jeans and T-shirt kind of girl. I do care somewhat about my looks, but not that much. Now you know me. For the most part at least.