Chapter 1

So, news is, there's a new group in town.

Aaron told me few hours ago when he came around to give me some books about planting. He still kept trying after all these months. Still wanted me to participate. Emilia, he always said, you need to make friends. But I just couldn't. Maybe I wasn't thankful. I sighted. They were with Deanna now. There would be a welcome party. I should come, Aaron had said. I had nodded, but we both knew that I wouldn't.

I sat on the porch and looked up to the moon. Thinking back, wringing my hands. I had to admit that I was a bit curious about these new people. I knew that the other survivors always kept up hope that someday Aaron would bring back someone they once knew. A relict of the good old days, a friend, a relative, a colleague, anybody. Everyone I knew was dead. I was sure as hell about that.

But still I couldn't help the curiosity. So, I stood up and walked slowly towards the center of the town. Good people, Aaron had said. I knew were all the others were living and which of the houses were free. So I turned right towards some of the empty residences. There was light in a big one just two streets from mine. Slowly I walked down the street, trying to appear normal. Just some casual citizen on her evening walk. There were figures sitting on the dark front porch, two men and a woman - as far as I could make out. One with blond hair and a beard sat on the front stairs. A woman with short grey hair stood behind him. The other guy, with dark hair hanging in his face, sat on the balustrade leaning against a pillar. They looked tired. I starred at them blatantly as I passed. The guys eyed me back suspiciously, almost hostile. The woman smiled and waved. I frowned and nodded shortly. They seemed different from the other town folk. Hard and distant. They were out there for a while. I couldn't even imagine what they had to do to keep alive. At least they had each other. I passed the house and turned around the corner heading home again. I've seen enough so far.

The next day I met Jessie at the supplies center when I needed to stock up some food. She had always been nice but distant. Well, to be honest, I was the one still on the outside of this community. She smiled as I entered.

"You've seen the new arrivals?" she asked.

"Just some."

"They seem nice."

Not really, I thought, but nodded.

"You'll come to the party?"

I shrugged.

"You should." She passed me and went for the door. "Take care."

That was the longest conversation I had with another person than Aaron since weeks. I sighted. I asked for the stuff I needed. Olivia was eying me distrustful.

"Do you have any seeds or other stuff for planting?" I asked in my friendliest voice.

"What for?"

"I started a garden and I only have a few things to grow – like potatoes and some herbs. I'd like to grow wheat or beans or tomatoes - stuff like that. Could help us all."

She looked at me in disbelieve.

"No, there are no such things."

"Yeah, thought so." I nodded.

We eyed each other for another few seconds. I became nervous.

"I think it's a good idea." Olivia finally said.

I just nodded again. Then I took my stuff and made an escape from the awkward situation the people of Alexandria forced me into again and again. I went home and took the route which would take me around the house of the new arrivals. I couldn't even tell why.

As I came closer I could see one of the guys from the evening before on the porch again. He carried a baby, quietly talking to him while he rocked the little one in his arms. He looked sleazy; his hair a mess, hanging deeply in his face; his clothes dirty and worn out. The sleeves of his shirt were ripped off, leaving his muscular arms bare. As he turned I could see wings sewn to the back of his leather west. He didn't exactly look like a bad guy, but there was something edgy to his appearance. Nevertheless he cared very tenderly for the baby in his arms. He fed her with formula I could see as I came closer.

As I reached the front of the house I stopped. I didn't know why. I just stood there and watched him. Like a moron.

He had already seen me approaching, now that I stood there starring at him he turned towards me and starred back. His face was emotionless almost cold. So we gazed at each other, unmoving. I really couldn't tell what was so disturbing about him that left me gaping there. Couldn't even imagine what he was thinking. Maybe he thought I was a maniac or a psychopath. But his face was unreadable. He just stood there, watching. He didn't smile, he didn't nod or greet in any other way.

Slowly I started walking again. I could feel his gaze in my back. When I was around the corner I quickened my step. Strangely I felt like I was fleeing. It took like forever to reach my home and I went immediately inside like I had been hunted. Maybe I was losing my mind. I threw the food on the kitchen table and leaned on the counter, catching my breath. What a strange feeling.

Days always were the same in Alexandria: one after the other passing by in uneventful silence. I had fallen into a routine since I started my gardening project. Standing up, eating breakfast, tending the garden, reading, drinking coffee, reading, tending the garden, ignoring other people, eating dinner, sleeping. Every day. The only people from Alexandria I somehow connect with were Aaron and Eric- mainly because they brought me in. The first few months I had wrestled with myself whether I would stay or better leave again. After being alone for so long I felt uneasy around people.

The afternoon I had finished the last book I had lent from Eric. Garden was fine, couldn't do anything without seeds. House was clean. There was nothing I could do. So I decided to bring back the books to Eric and maybe lent some new. Slowly I walked through the town ignoring the stares of the other citizens.

I was about to knock at Eric's and Aaron's house when the door was pulled open and Eric almost ran into me.

"Emilia!" he said surprised.

"Hey," I tried a smile, but knew I failed, "I bring back your books."

"Oh, yes…" he looked down on the books in my hands.

"I thought maybe I could borrow some others?"

"Yes, of course." He stepped back inside and invited me in. "I'm sorry, but I'm in a hurry. Was due on guarding the gate ten minutes ago. But Aaron will be back in no time."

"I could come back later." I offered, already about to turn.

"No no, Aaron will be here any minute. He just wanted to pick up something from Olivia. We are always happy when you visit." He smiled such a nice reassuring smile that made me feel uncomfortable immediately.

"You know where to find the books, feel free to take as many as you want." He was already at the door and then - with a last wave and still that awfully nice smile on his face – he was gone and the door closed.

I thought about waiting a few minutes and then leaving again but then I decided otherwise. Couldn't be that rude to these both. They were trying so hard to be friends. So I walked over into the living room where they had lots of book shelves filled with any kind of literature.

I went through the titles, pulling some out, reading the introduction on the back and totally forgot where I was when I heard someone approaching. I turned round expecting Aaron and stopped short surprised as my eyes fell on somebody else.

It was the guy from the new group, the one feeding the baby on the porch, the one with the leather west. He had a towel in his hands, slowly rubbing his fingers which were black from some fluid, seemingly oil. He starred at me and I just stared back. After a while the silence became awkward. I cleared my throat.

"You are not Aaron." I said. Very smart.

The guy just kept starring. His face was bare any emotion, his steel blue eyes shining cold and making shivers running down my back. This one is tough, I thought.

"Eric didn't say that you were here." I added insecure. "You… need something?"

"Could ask you the same."

His voice was rough and low. I frowned.

"Guess that's none of your business." I turned for the shelves again, feeling angry but somehow embarrassed and cursed my insecurity. Strange. I took another book and went through its pages. But I wasn't concentrating at all. I was listening carefully if that strange guy with the disturbing blue eyes was leaving. He wasn't. Again I could feel his eyes on my back and that made me damn nervous. I put the book away and reached for another one. I realized suddenly that my hands were trembling. I hoped he couldn't see that. Why wasn't he leaving? What was he doing here anyway?

"Gonna stand there forever?" I asked without turning, my voice icy.

He didn't answer.

I turned around to check if he was still there. He was. I took the book which I picked up last, couldn't even remember the title but I desperately had to get away from this situation.

"You're the one passing our house yesterday." The guy was accidently or purposely blocking the way out. I felt trapped.

"And?" I tried to sound bored but couldn't help that my voice was trembling. Stupid, stupid Emilia!

Before he could answer, the sound of the front door interrupted our exciting conversation, and a few seconds later Aaron came in. I released my breath in relieve.

"Daryl, you're here…" his sight fell upon me. "Emilia, hi." Aaron looked confused but smiled. "So you met, great. Emilia this is Daryl Dixon, he was with the group we brought in couple of days ago. He's working on the bike in our garage. Daryl, this is Emilia Sommer, she…"

"I just came to return your books and grab something new to read. Got this one. Thanks." I waved the book about my head. Never was so glad to see Aaron. Not even as he found me in the woods. "So, I'm… uhm… leaving again." I made my way to the door refusing to look at Daryl.

"Interesting." Aaron frowned. "Never knew you were into that kind of stuff." He pointed at the book in my hands. I followed his glance. Chinese Export Porcelain for the American Trade 1785-1835. Fuck!

"Yes, "I said, trying to keep my voice stable, "I am very much into… porcelain." I started to walk again, passing them quickly so they couldn't see my face.

"Wait" Aaron called as I reached the door, "we'll have dinner tonight, when Eric's back from duty. Daryl will be there too, wanna join us? Would be nice!"

I would rather eat in a room full of biters than spend dinner under the cold stare of these blue eyes.

"Nah," I turned back smiling, "I'm not in for double dating. Sorry." I waved with the book again and fled the house and the pejorative, dismissive eyes of new guy Daryl.

Two days later there was this party. Aaron reminded me around noon. God, he was persistent. I had no interest in small talk about how to make pasta and how to decorate your house or which was the best-smelling soap around. The folk of Alexandria lived there lives as if everything was still normal around these walls. Most of them never killed a walker. They've never been cold or hungry. They lost people, sure, but only far away. They haven't witnessed how people were torn apart by biters till there was nothing left but blood and raw flesh. I shivered, banning the memories from my mind.

It was already dark outside when I thought this night might get a little chilly and decided to check on the herbs again. I threw my jacket over my shoulder and went outside. All the houses at the end of the street were dark. It was so quiet because everybody else was at the welcome party. I felt reminded of my time in the woods when I was all alone. Sometimes my breath was the only sound, or the distant snarling of a walker.

I had planted the garden next to the house in front of the wall. The herbs were situated directly in the corner between the huge fence and wall of house so they only seldom were in direct sunshine. I had read that in a book. I had read so many books about gardening, but still actually I had no idea what I was doing. But I needed something to keep up.

I went down to my knees and touched the ground around the still tiny plants. The earth didn't feel that cold. But the air was freezing, maybe I should cover them. As I kneeled there, thinking what material I had and what could be used for coverage, a voice made me jump.

"I missed you at the party."

I twisted around seeing Aiden leaning against the corner of my house. He smiled. I rolled my eyes and stood up. He tried to hit on me several times but since he hadn't talked to me for about three weeks I thought he had given up. Well, seems I was wrong.

"I thought we might share a drink or two. Maybe dance a little." His smile grew wider and somehow it seemed dirty. He swayed slightly. Guess he was drunk.

"Seems you had already enough." I said emotionless.

"Come on, a little party never killed nobody?" He laughed at his own joke.

"Aiden," I said slowly, "I am not in the mood to explain my disinterest to you . Again."

"Always so repellent." He still smiled and made a step forward. He stumbled. Jep, definitely drunk.

Rolling my eyes I decided I had enough of this and made a few steps in his direction towards the porch.

"Good night Aiden." I said when I passed him. But suddenly he grabbed my arm und pulled me back.

"Let go of me!" I hissed.

"I know girls like you need a little bit more persuasion." His eyes wandered down my body. "You always say no but deep inside you mean yes."

"Let go of me." I repeated pronouncing every word carefully. Aiden still smiled and grabbed for my other arm. I tried to free myself but his grip was firm. He really hurt me. I couldn't believe that this was actually happening! I tried to bring my knee up but he flinched back laughing. He twisted me around and pushed me against the house. He bent my arm back and pressed it against my back. I tried not to wince, not to show how much he hurt me. Fear washed through me. His head was over my shoulder, his mouth directly next to my ear.

"You will like it, I promise." He whispered.

I thought I might throw up when his other hand went down my lower back. Maybe I should scream, but nobody would hear me, they were all at the party on the other side of town. I panicked. I pushed back one more time but it had no use, Aiden was to strong.

But all of a sudden he was gone.

I was free.

I turned around quickly. Aiden was on the ground, looking up at someone standing over him. I could only see the back of my savior. Wings attached to a leather west. Daryl.

"What are you doing?" Aiden yelled at him.

"Girl said no." Daryl's voice was low and hoarse.

"We were just having some fun." Aiden tried to stand up. Daryl moved one step in front of me, blocking Aiden's view. The whole situation was absolutely surreal. It all happened so fast, I stood there, my body paralysed, my heart beating fast.

"You should leave." Daryl just said but it sounded threatening.

"Are you kidding?" Aiden tapped some dirt of his jacket.

Daryl just gave him a heavy push and Aiden fell back again.

"Leave."

With one last angry glance at me Aiden stood up, turned and left, limping slightly.

All the time I stood there, motionless, my hands turned into fists. Helpless. As Aiden was around the corner of the house Daryl turned and eyed me for a second.

"You're ok?" he asked.

But my eyes were still fixed on the edge of the house and it took me another few moments to calm down and relax. Finally I released my breath. My hands unfolded, they were still shaking – and hurting. As I looked down I realized, I pressed so hard that my nails cut into my palm. Daryl saw that, too.

He reached for my arm but I pulled back. He hesitated.

"You should go inside. Take care of your hands." Then he turned and walked away. I followed him a few steps behind. My mind was still trying to understand what just had happened.

As I reached the stairs in front of the house I hesitantly turned round.

"Thank you." I said almost voiceless. My right hand hurt like hell because my grip around the wooden balustrade was so firm. But the pain helped me to concentrate again.

Daryl was already at the street but he stopped. He took a moment, then he turned and nodded shortly. For another few seconds we starred at each other. My heart still beat like hell. God, what an awful evening. I shivered. Quickly I went inside.