Dying to be Waiting
"The healer has the bloodiest hands. You cannot treat a wound without knowing how deep it goes. You cannot heal pain by hiding it. You must accept. Accept the blood to make things better."
It was the last thing Numina's mother said to her before leaving for war, called to join the warriors by Odin himself. She had been a master of blades and stealth, an unparalleled force on the battle field. And she had been slain in the very last conflict, surviving the years of fighting only to die saving the Allfather himself.
It left Numina an orphan, her father left unknown and nonexistent in her life, but she was not to be given to some relative or family. The Queen had seen Numina's mother as a friend, and cherished her as such. Manipulating some laws, Frigga had made sure that Numina remained in possession of her mother's estate, raising her to the head of her household, though there was only one left.
For her mother's victory and sacrifice, her history of service, Numina was given more wealth than she could ever imagine, more than she would ever use. A new world of possibilities was open up to her, yet Numina refused to take advantage of any of it. The wealth sat untouched for many years. The reputation of her mother dwindled. The celebrations of her valiance and victories ended. Soon the memory of Falare, advisor and assassin for the King of Asgard faded completely, as her daughter Numina did.
Numina preferred it this way though, secluding herself in the mansion of gold and silver. For years she stayed out of the eyes of the rest of nobility, becoming a nobody that superstitious rumors were soon created for.
"The healer has the bloodiest hands. You cannot treat a wound without knowing how deep it goes." Numina took these words almost literally, though she did know of the true meaning. The skills in combat that were passed down from her mother were quickly abandoned as she took up a new craft: healing.
Blood was splattered across her forearms as she pressed her hands on a soldier's wound. There were too many of them for the palace healers to treat, causing the lower levels of the palace to transform into a makeshift infirmary. Any and all who had even considered dabbling in healing and treating wounds was summoned, Numina included.
It was an underground arena for warriors to train and spar originally, but it was now filled with bleeding and dying Asgardian soldiers that were fighting in the current war for peace in the other realms. Numina didn't care to think about the details. Some malevolent force had managed to gather in strength and was now wreaking havoc on allies of Asgard. What she did care about was why the conflict was lasting so long, why for the past week she had to work herself to near exhaustion treating sword wounds, burns, broken bones, and many other common injuries acquired in battle. Numina hated war and fighting. In her quest to become a skilled healer, she had become the complete opposite of her mother in everything except for her desire to save lives.
Her hands were bloody as her magic knitted flesh and muscle back together. The soldier breathed words of gratitude, but Numina did not have time to hear them. The assistant that had been assigned to her was ushering Numina to another patient, another man with grievous injuries. Everything around her became a blur.
Stem blood loss, survey wounds, keep blood pressure optimal, numb nerves, is he still in pain? Dampen senses, keep him awake, seal veins, mend bones, sooth away burns, connect muscles, is the blood flow normal? Go back, double check, redouble efforts, reseal, reconnect, re-mend. Close the wound. Move to the next one. It was all happening so fast, an unending, wicked repetition of blood and wounds.
A firm hand on her shoulder stopping her from moving to another soldier was the only thing that brought her from the trance she entered. She turned to find two of the King's Guard standing before her.
"You must come with us," one of them growled.
Lost in the task of saving all of those her assistant moved her to, Numina was utterly confused. Her sense of time was gone as well as awareness of her surroundings. But you do not disobey a direct order from those who directly serve the King. She spoke no words, only followed, the assistant who had made some organization to the madness of the infirmary moved on to another healer, helping them focus and steering them towards others that needed help.
The guards led her through the hallways of palace. Very few people were in the corridors, and those that they passed were rushing to complete some task. Numina was becoming acutely aware of her appearance. The blood she had been working in was now caked to her arms, drying under her nails, and splattered against her originally clean dress. Her hair that had been pulled neatly in a bun was now disheveled, strands of moonlight blond hair falling haphazardly across her face and shoulders.
As they rounded a corner, Numina's masked confusion became horror. She finally recognized the area of the palace she was being led to. They were in the halls that housed the royal family. Members of the King's Guard lined either side of the hallway. Numina's heart was beating frantically. Her two guides opened a door before them and bid her to enter. Though her mind was screaming against it, she walked in, a soft echo following her as the doors were closed behind her.
The room was lit faintly with soft candlelight. In the center was a bed, a figure lying on top. Something was wrong with him, she could tell as much from the raspy breaths that shattered the stillness of the room. Several people were huddled around the figure. One of which she recognized as a palace healer. The others were too far away and cloaked in shadow for her to make out.
A man stepped forward. It was Odin, the King. "Do you know why you were brought here?"
"No, your majesty," Numina said, her word whispered and rushed from nervousness. She hastily bowed before him.
"It is said that every man you have attended to has lived, their wounds healed with skill that rivals the palace's own healers," the King continued. "Is this true?"
Numina couldn't remember every person she had healed that day, but she would know if she had lost someone. It would eat at her if she had. "I know not how many people I have tended to today, you majesty, but not one of them has died," she answered, unable to meet his gaze.
"I have a number for you," said a woman who rose slightly from the bedside. It was Frigga, the Queen. "63 by the count of your assistant." It was a remarkably large number, yet Numina did not doubt it. Her waning strength certainly attested to that fact.
"It is because of this that I have summoned you," the Allfather continued, motioning for Numina to come forward. "Please, save my son."
Thor lay on the bed, sweat trickling from his features. His eyes fluttered beneath closed lids, breaths strained and wheezing. His skin was sickly pale, as if it were turning translucent. A wound stretched across his ribcage towards his stomach, shallow and non-life-threatening, yet it looked several days old and remained unhealed. Muscular hands were clenched, knuckles turning ghostly white. Whatever it was that ailed him, Prince Thor was in immense pain.
Frigga rose from her seat and offered it to Numina, her eyes red and cheeks stained with tears. The other healer moved to gather any supplies that might be needed. Odin stood beside his son, face grim. Further back, cast in shadows, Loki stood, looking haunted in the dim light. He did not look at his brother.
"What ails him?" Numina asked, removing the blood from her arms with a simple gesture laced with magic.
"We do not know," Frigga answered.
Numina nodded, placing a hand over his wound, blue light emanating from her hand as she released the swirling energy that bubbled inside her, waiting and longing for purpose and form. "Fill me in," she added.
Thor had been at the forefront of the battle, decimating the opposing army with Loki, the Warriors Three, and Lady Sif. The battle was going well, it certainly wouldn't have carried on past that day had treachery not befallen the Golden Prince. One of his enemies managed to wound him using magic to deceive Thor of his true whereabouts. The blade was laced with some kind of substance that, once it had taken hold, had reduced Thor to the state he was in now. Thor was dying.
The healers had tried ever remedy known in the fallowing days, only managing to stem the rate at which the toxin killed Thor, though they were running out of time. Numina listened intently as the palace healer rattled off the many treatments she and the others had attempted. As she was listening, her magic scoured its way through Thor's veins. She could easily identify the thing that was killing him, weaving through his bloodstream, but there was no source; and every pull and push she enacted on the mysterious substance, it would quickly replicate itself.
Whatever it was, it did not simply travel through the blood; it was manipulating it somehow. It was miniscule, she almost didn't notice it, but there was a slight alteration in Thor's blood. The regenerative poultices and the Asgardian physiology must have been helping to mask it, but as she asked the healer to run through the remedies once more, her idea was proven true.
"You've been treating for poison this whole time?" Numina asked.
"Of course," the healer confirmed, as if offended by the apparent silliness of the question. "What else would you lace along the edge of your blade?"
Numina reached for the surgical dagger she kept sheathed to her hip. Without a word she opened another wound on Thor's arm, though no blood fell from it. Her healing magic began to take effect as she pushed the blood from the new wound on the prince's arm into his body, working it backwards so speak. From the initial wound, Numina drew the blood out, faint blue magic encasing it. She placed a bowl underneath, allowing it to catch the substance that tainted the blood she pulled from it before healing the damage in the cells and forcing it in through the wound she had opened up.
"Venom," she answered, not taking her attention from the task.
The clotting properties in venom had caused the constriction of Thor's airways, but the tonics and natural resilience of Asgardians had kept the true nature of the ailment from reach. It was the slight alteration in the blood Numina had found that tipped her off. That, and if it had been poison, the healers would have reversed its effects by now.
Hour after hour Numina sat beside Thor, ripping the venom from his blood, fixing the damage it had caused, and returning it back into his bloodstream. It was a long and arduous task. The many days left hindered but not stopped had allowed the venom to weave its way through most of his circulatory system. It was as she was about to repeat the process after clearing his entire bloodstream once that Numina's nose started to bleed.
Exhaustion is deep and aching for all things, whether it is physical or magical. Yet exhausting magic can be seen as far more deadly. Though you may run or fight until you are tired, there is still more energy to pull from to walk or do other menial tasks despite how exhausted you are. There is always that last reserve of energy for you to pull from. With magic, you tap into the energy stored deep within you wither it is physical, magical, or mental. Numina had been pulling from all three, having used a great deal of her energy on the other soldiers. Her nose bleed was her body's way of warning her of the stress she was enacting on herself. But she could not stop. She needed to save Thor.
Numina could feel the fatigue on the edges of her mind when a strong hand gripped her arm, searing cold spreading across skin as it jarred and pinched her muscles and skin. Energy surged through her, freezing relief that scorched her veins, reawakening her senses, mind, and body to their full potential, easing away the dullness that had settled as her strength faded. She did not know who it was that had given her strength, and the only offer of thanks she could give was a ragged exhale, as her body relaxed with the newfound energy.
Twice more after her initial cleansing of Thor's blood and Numina was finally confident in saying that she had succeeded. The Asgardian Prince's breathing had become normal hours ago and color was slowly returning to his skin. The rigorous tension that his body held from the pain the wreaked him had eased, flickering eyes stilling. He was relaxed. He was going to live.
The healer's hands were bloodied once more from working so closely with it. Her body was numb from exhaustion, fatigue. But she had done it. She had removed the last traces of the venom. With a small flick of her hand, she sealed the cut she had created on his arm, leaving the initial injury to continue to serve as an indicator as to whether or not the prince's condition was improving.
Blackness enveloped her before she could register what was happening; unconsciousness greeting her as though it was an old friend. Numina's mind and body had been pushed to their limits without her fully realizing it.
The Queen was the one to catch her before she crashed onto the stone ground, cradling Numina in her arms as though she were her daughter. Frigga looked from the healer to her son, tears of joy springing to her eyes. She had done it. She had saved Thor. Two guards entered the room at Frigga's call, and carried Numina's limp body out of the chamber and to a guest suite. They did not even know this woman's name, yet the King and Queen owed her a debt that they did not imagine they could repay.
Father and Mother crowded around Thor, sitting beside him, waiting for him to show stronger signs of life. Frigga was softly stroking his hair; Odin was sitting ever still, watchful and mindful of every movement his heir made.
And Loki. He watched the woman, as he had since she first entered. She had lacked subtly and finesse, yet there was no mistaking the power she held in magic. It was raw power, unrefined. Perhaps it was the reason she had run out of energy halfway through her healing. Loki clenched and unclenched his fist, shaking of the slight numbness he felt from the loss of energy. Frigga and Odin may wish to think it was out of kindness, but Loki convinced himself that it was because there was no point in both of them dying. Keeping that healer alive served to keep Thor alive. You couldn't have the heir of the throne dying after all.
~~.O.~~
The room Numina awoke in was unfamiliar. It was not her own. There was no desk covered in notes and reagents, no workbench covered in herbs and poultices, beakers and minerals. She sat up, lighting the torches that lined the room with a wave of her hand. With the blinding light, the memories of the previous day flooded her.
A gasp escaped her as she quickly rose from the bed, turning for the door. She nearly opened it when she remembered that she had blacked out after healing Thor. Numina stopped, hand on the door, letting her heart and breathing return to their normal rates. She turned back to the room she now found herself in.
It was adorned in simple decorations and looked untouched. Chambers meant for guests, she assumed. On a nearby chair, a simple dress was laid out for her, her own clothes ruined from her work. She quickly retreated into the bathing room, washing herself before slipping into the dress. It was a sky blue color, elegant in its simplicity. Forsaking the bun she had worn previously, she tied her hair off close to the ends with black ribbon, allowing only her bangs to frame her face while the rest was kept neatly behind her shoulders.
The sun had yet to rise, a midnight purple sky spreading out across the landscape outside the window. Numina had no idea how long she had been resting nor how many days had passed since she first started. Her sense of time completely askew from the trance she entered when healing many people for long periods of time.
She finally opened the door and stepped into the hallway. A guard was stationed outside, jumping at the sight of her. "You are supposed to be resting," he said, voice shaking slightly. "The Queen instructed that you were not to be disturbed."
Numina looked at him curiously. She was a nobody, yet this guard was stumbling over his words as though she were royalty. "And I was not disturbed," she said quietly. "Please take me to Prince Thor's chambers."
The guard looked as though he was going to argue, but decided against it. She was a healer after all, the one who saved the Mighty Thor. If she said that she that she wanted to go to the Asgardian Prince's chambers, who was he to argue with her. Perhaps she still had more healing to do.
Nervousness filled Numina once more as the guard escorted her down the intimidatingly large corridors. It did not feel right for her to be in this part of the palace. She thought herself and intruder, boring and plain compared to the rest of her surroundings. Even the guards matched the area more so than she did. Such thoughts that tore down her self-confidence were quickly abandoned as the doors into Thor's chambers were opened.
Only one candle was lit, leaving the rest of the room in total darkness. A man with raven black hair sat beside the little light, a book in his hands, slender fingers outlining the page as he turned it. Loki.
Numina hesitated by the door for a moment before regaining some confidence. A healer that now walked amongst gods? No one would believe it. There was slight trepidation in her soft steps, but she forced herself forward, looking only at the seat beside Thor's bed that would allow her to inspect his injury. She did notice, however, that Loki did not look up from his book at any point.
Before taking a seat, she breathed a quiet acknowledgement and greeting, "Prince Loki."
He did not look up, emerald eyes fixed on the words of his book. "I assumed you would still be resting."
His voice was slick and cool, like water that gently flows over the rocks in a slow moving stream. But the words were cold, devoid of emotion. "I was once told that if you have time to rest, you are doing your job incorrectly."
"Hmm."
Nimble fingers eased the bandages off of Thor's torso, exposing his injuries. The prince shivered as the frigid air the room prickled against his skin. Numina was there however, with a simple spell that heated the air around him, the bumps that had begun to riddle his skin easing away. One of her delicate hands hovered above his wound. Pale blue energy glowed brightly in her palm before it snaked its way into the wound. It spread throughout Thor's body, mapping every vein and muscle, searching for anything that could be a source of harm.
You could see the energy flowing through his veins, illuminating each one with a soft glow visible through his skin, the pulsing magic creating a strange beauty. Numina did not find anything to be wrong, there was no trace of the venom nor of anything damaged by it. She allowed herself a small smile at her work, weaving the skin of Thor's remaining wound together.
The magic that illuminated the room faded as Numina released the energy, sighing softly in relief. Her eyes drifted over the Loki. Their eyes met for a fraction of an instant before he hastily returned his attention to the book in his hands. He had been watching her.
A small blush rose to her cheeks at the idea of his scrutiny before she rose to her feet, turning to leave. Loki's voice stopped her, however.
"You are a powerful healer, I will give you that," he said. "But your control over you magic is…nonexistent."
Numina was slightly taken aback by his criticism. She did not think herself a master of magic, but she believed that she was better than most. "I beg your pardon, my lord?"
"When you were healing my brother you allowed your energy to flow almost completely unchecked," Loki continued, not bothering to look up. "I could have easily seized it for myself, you allowed it to permeate the atmosphere so heavily."
"Perhaps you could have," Numina responded, becoming slightly defensive. "As could your brother have as well, and though he does not wield magic as you do, all Asgardian's have a tendency to draw strength from magical energies unconsciously."
"Yet there was hardly any transferal from your energy cloud into him," Loki countered. His tone was even and he refused to look at the healer. If she could look into his eyes, she would have seen the glimmer that always permeates the God of Mischief's emerald gaze when he was up to some sort of game.
"Not as much as I had hoped for, admittedly, but it served another purpose to fuel the healing spells I was weaving without me having to consciously focus on where the energy transference was occurring. Magic knows when and where it needs its strength, the spells drew the energy as needed."
"It is a highly ineffective method of fueling magic," Loki replied, egging her on.
"In the case as barbarically mundane offensive magic, you are correct," Numina nearly snapped. Her mouth dropped open in shock and horror as she suddenly realized that she was arguing with Prince Loki, son of the King. What gall she foolishly had let herself have. "M-my lord," she stammered. "I apologize for-"
"What is magic?" Loki interrupted her.
"I-I'm…sorry?"
"I did not stutter as you currently are," he replied rather vindictively. "I asked you what magic is."
Numina's frowned. The question seemed like a simple one, yet she knew of Loki, the God of Mischief. Nothing was ever simple in regards to him. She took a moment to collect her thoughts. "Magic is the manipulation of reality," she started. "It is an ancient form of energy the flows in all beings, though it is weaker in some and immeasurably strong in others." Her voice sounded frail at first, though it grew as she continued. "Those that have an affinity for magic can tap into that energy, drawing it forth shaping it into something that is concrete and has purpose. What magic is shaped into does not define it, however. It is neither good nor bad, tool nor weapon. That depends solely on the wielder."
"There may be some hope for you after all," Loki said, voice calculating, hiding his intrigue. "Speak to me as you did earlier, however," he continued, his tone dropping into a deadly hiss, "and you will come to regret it."
He could not miss the fear that flashed in her icy blue eyes. "Yes, my lord," she breathed quickly, bowing. "I apologize." Without another word she carried herself to the door, leaving the frigid room.
Loki allowed his eyes to follow her. The girl was curious. She spoke with wisdom and had a decent grasp on magic and the fundamentals. It was apparent that she was self-taught however. Her opinion on what magic was proved as much. Those who are formally instructed have tendency to view magic as one thing instead of all things it can be manipulated into. The healer had demonstrated she knew as much, though her rough style in wielding it limited her own ability.
The door closed, leaving Loki in silence to watch over his brother alone once more. He contemplated why he had made that last, rather cruel remark. It was unnecessary, and if he were to be honest, he had enjoyed the way she readily conversed, or argued, with him about her magic. It had been the most intelligent conversation he had in months. Yet he would never say so. The God of Mischief did have a reputation to uphold.
~~.O.~~
Numina was once more summoned unexpectedly. She was returning once more from Thor's chambers for the second time that day. The prince had yet to awaken, but his condition looked promising. She believed that he would wake up soon, perhaps a little sore, but fully conscious.
There had only been a few times that Numina had the privilege of being in the throne room, mostly for ceremonies that her mother attended to ensure the safety of the King or to honor him. She had never been there when it was all but devoid of life save for the King and Queen and herself.
Her footsteps echoed loudly on the polished floor, drifting up towards the ceiling that was incredibly high. Marvelous pillars with exquisite carvings and details outlined this magnificent area. Numina had never felt so small and insignificant in her life. As she walked forward, she could not help but feel terrified.
The Allfather was seated on his throne, Frigga standing by his side, the strain of earlier events lifted from her features. On the furthest step from the throne, Loki stood, clad in green and black, features as unreadable as the stone around him. Numina gave them a customary bow once she stood before them, her eyes hesitating before meeting the King's gaze. She was unaccustomed to so much attention, particularly from anyone of importance.
"When I sent for you, I had my doubts," Odin started, his voice calm and regal. "Every healer in the palace had tried and failed before you, healers with much greater skill and experience. It was hard believe the tales of your successes with the soldiers, not a single life lost under you magic." The King paused. "I was wrong to doubt you," he admitted. "My finest healers did not want to leave my son's fate in the hands of someone so young and inexperienced. My Queen was the one who insisted on giving you a chance, and you were the one to save his life."
Numina bowed her head in humility, undeserving of any praise he might offer her. Though it had been a prince that lay before her as one who needed saving, she had simply been doing her job. "A healer's purpose is to save the lives of those they can, my King. I am simply relieved that I could fulfill that purpose."
"You are not the only one relieved that you were able to do so, my dear," Frigga spoke up, her voice soft and motherly. "My son is alive because of you."
"You did your service to Asgard by saving Thor's life, but we still owe you a great debt," Odin continued. "Yet we do not even know your name."
Her cheeks burned. Once before the crown had claimed to owe her a debt when her mother died. They had showed her with gifts and wealth, but they did nothing beyond this. She did not hope for things to change. Numina bowed her head slightly. "I am Numina…daughter of Falare."
Odin's eye widened in shock at this revelation, even Loki seemed slightly taken aback. Frigga was the only one not caught off guard by the healer's identity. The daughter of Falare- of the assassin known as Mercy, the uncompromising blade, to Asgard's enemies- stood before them, eyes cast downwards. It was hard to believe that such a shy woman was the daughter of a fierce warrior.
Frigga offered Numina a smile. "Falare was a dear friend of mine," she said. "I see a great deal of her in you, despite walking a different path. She chose one of blades and shadows; and you, magic and healing."
"Both of which leave the travelers' hands covered in equal amounts of blood, my Queen," Numina said quietly.
The Queen said nothing but smiled knowingly, allowing her husband to speak once more. "Numina, daughter of Falare, we are indebted to you for saving the life of our son. Name whatever you so desire, and it shall be yours."
"Your majesty…I want for nothing…" Numina said in a small voice, unsure if refusing his offer would be seen as insulting.
Silence permeated the hall for a moment. Numina was sure that the others could hear how frantically her heart was beating. It was Frigga who broke the quiet atmosphere. "So very much like your mother, wanting neither praise nor prize for honorable deeds." The Queen smiled. "For your service, I name you, Numina daughter of Falare, my lady-in-waiting. You shall be moved into the palace and treated as if you were my daughter, a princess to all of Asgard." Numina gaped at her. "There is no doubting your skill as a healer, but your magic is unrefined. From this point on, you will begin training under the instruction of my son Loki as his apprentice." Loki turned towards his mother, protest on his lips, but he was kept in silence by the stern look Frigga gave him. "What have you to say to this?"
For a moment, Numina's words failed her. "I…am not sure what to say, my Queen. 'Thank you' and any other form of gratification do not seem able in properly expressing-"
Numina was cut off by a delighted chuckle from Frigga. "You need not say anymore, Numina," she said, descending down the steps of the throne. "Come, walk with me. I will show you your new home." Speechlessly, Numina obeyed the Queen, walking side by side with her as they began to make their way out of the throne. "Chin up, my dear," Frigga chastised her quietly as they went, her nervousness fueling her innate shyness. "You are a princess in all but blood now."
With uneasy laughter, Numina did as instructed walking confidently beside the Queen, or at least pretending to. "I simply am in a form of shock, my Queen."
Their conversation soon became indistinct to Loki's ears as the doors closed. Eerily calm, Loki turned to Odin. "No," he said firmly.
"I have no say in this matter, Loki," his father replied.
"I will not take an apprentice," Loki reaffirmed, ignoring Odin's comment. "And if I were, it would not be here."
"You owe her your brother's life."
"Let him repay that debt," he hissed. "Do not make me suffer for his foolish antics."
"I have no say in this matter," Odin repeated. "If you have an issue, take it up with your mother. It is by her decree that Numina has been named your apprentice."
Loki glared at his father before giving him and unsettlingly tranquil bow. The anger that raged in him painfully obvious, yet kept in check for the sake of appearing dangerous. Wordlessly, the God of Mischief left the throne room through one of the side entrances to avoid the girl. He would confront his mother about the issue later.
~~.O.~~
The next few days were like something out of a dream, a fairytale. She was moved into the palace, her belongings from her small estate brought or sold. Her bedroom area was massive, nearly the size of a small dining hall. Her own private study was connected by a large archway which featured an area for her to conduct magical research and construct reagents with enough space, supplies, and equipment to be considered an apothecary on the right. To her left was an elegant mahogany desk and chair surrounded by towering walls of bookshelves. Most of the shelves were empty, save a few of Numina's own books that managed to fill two and a half shelves. Frigga had said that it would be her job to fill the empty spaces, but did help her start, gifting her a few tomes on the basics of magic.
Numina stood in her study, leafing through the pages of the new book. She could hardly believe this was happening to her. Fate had never been kind to her, yet here she stood in her own private portion of the palace with numerous gowns hanging in her walk-in wardrobe, jewels glimmering on an amore in dazzling designs waiting to be worn, servants waiting on her, attention… Her life was alien to her now.
She was no longer the plain and ordinary healer working in clinics and healing rooms throughout the lower portions of Asgard with commoners. Now she stood, dressed in fine fabrics of pale blue, complementary to her eye color, silver and black. Her hair that had always been messy and tied away now shone as if it were made of moonlight in a waterfall trusses down her back, framing the soft, caring features of her face. Numina looked regal, like a princess in such fine clothes. And though Frigga had supplied her with fine gowns and dresses for all occasions, Numina was thankful that she could indeed still wear more practical clothes despite her new title.
The Queen's lady-in-waiting stood with a book in her hand, dressed in fine clothes. She wore a black shirt with sleeves that completely covered her arms, a loop wrapped around her thumbs. The shirt hugged her body tightly, accentuating her curves. Silver trim created small swirling designs at the hem and cuffs of the shirt. Black leather pants made her slender form more predominant. A dark blue sleeveless coat flowed down to the backs of her knees, tapering from the front to the length in the back. The coat also had silver accents, though the lines were much thicker and graceful. To keep it snug on her body, Numina wore a belt over the coat, leather with silver plates connected across it.
Frigga had insisted that most of Numina's wardrobe consisted of black, blue, and silver. The black clothing made the pale blond of Numina's hair stand out beautifully, the blue colors highlighted her eyes made of ice, and both of the colors emphasized her fair skin. The silver thread and jewelry were because she was now among the elite, and had to show as much. The Queen digressed that silver fit Numina's character and style far better than gold would.
Muffled voices drifted through her chambers from the door. She could tell that the one person was rather heated about something, the tone of the voice sounding irritated. She set the book down on a nearby table and moved closer.
"…I do not see what the issue is, Loki," she could hear Frigga say, her voice quietly filtering through the seams of the door.
"You assigned me an apprentice," came a muffled growl.
"It was time for you to have one. You have kept to yourself for too long."
"I do not need some simpleton following me around attempting to understand that which is beyond them." The words were calculated, chosen for added effects.
"You use your elegant words to hide your own emotions," Frigga stated. "You are acting like a child who selfishly wishes to keep all of his toys to himself."
"I am no child," Loki said blankly. "You assigned one to me."
"Numina could only be seen as childish in her unbiased caring heart," Frigga countered. "She is much wiser than you give her credit, and we owe her for saving Thor's life."
"Then have her marry him. Let him repay the debt of his life with his life," Loki nearly snapped. "I should not be dragged down by his self-wrought mishaps."
"I would not force such an arrangement on Numina or Thor," Frigga said.
"And instead you would force her upon me? To what end? Basic understanding of magic?" Loki scoffed. "She cares not for offensive magic and believes she knows all there is to the art of healing. That woman will be stubborn and unwilling to learn if it challenges her already firm views."
There was pang of sadness in Numina's heart where Loki's words filtered through the door and pierced her. She did not know what she had done to have his opinion of her be so low. But Numina could feel a specific emotion drifting from where she determined Loki to be in the hallway. She listened quietly by the door with her ears and her magic.
"What has Numina done to earn such a low opinion from you?" Frigga asked.
"Nothing," Loki hissed impatiently
There was a moment of hesitation before the Queen spoke again. "If you believe Numina to be stubborn and unwilling to learn, then I see more necessity of her apprenticeship, for you are the one who might end up learning more from her than she will from you. That is my hope at least."
"This is ridiculous-"
"This is a decision that will not be changed no matter how hard you may try to sabotage it," Frigga interrupted firmly. "I will escort Numina to the training area where I expect you to meet us. You will begin instructing her today. Afterwards, you will escort her to the banquet we hold in celebration of Thor's recovery later this evening."
Silence followed for a moment. "As you wish."
Footsteps began to retreat down the hallway and Numina quickly retreated away from the door, entering the study so that she might feign ignorance about everything she heard. There was a loud nock on the door, and Numina casually pulled on the door with an insignificant burst of magic.
Numina walked out from the study as Frigga entered her chambers. "My Queen," she greeted her with a bow.
"You look marvelous, my dear," Frigga said in earnest, taking Numina's hands in her own. "Like a true lady-in-waiting, a true princess."
"Thank you," Numina said with a smile.
Frigga gave one of her own, warm and gentle like all mothers were. "Walk with me," she said, leading Numina into the grand hallways.
It was still strange to be in this portion of the palace. Numina was half expecting someone to appear and tell her that she didn't belong here, yet the Queen walked beside her, proving that she somehow had the right to be where she was.
"What is a lady-in-waiting supposed to do, your majesty?" she asked.
A small smile tugged at Frigga's lips. "Normally they serve the Queen as a personal assistant, tending to their every need much like a servant would. You, however, will be doing no such thing." Numina frowned slightly, unsure of what that meant. "The position gives you a great deal of power and it places you above most of the nobles' standing in the court. As for what you will be doing, outside of Loki's apprentice that depends on what you wish to do."
Their footsteps clacked loudly against the brilliantly polished floor. "Why did you name me as your lady-in-waiting?"
"Your mother was a dear friend of mine, and her sacrifice saved the life of my husband," Frigga said. "We honored her for a short time, but then forgot about her, forgot about who she left behind." The Queen stopped and turned to Numina. "I was not about to let history repeat itself, forgetting about you once more. As my lady-in-waiting it will be easier for people to remember that you saved Thor's life, that you deserve the position at the head of the court."
"Is that the only reason, though?" Numina asked as they continued to make their way down the hall once more.
There was a small hesitation. "No, it is not." The way the queen said it, Numina knew that she would not be disclosing her full intentions at the moment. "I must apologize, Numina," she continued. "Though the position gives you more power and freedom that you did not have before, it also takes away some freedom. You will be forced to play the political game and abide by the rules of pleasing the other nobles in appearance, mannerism, and opinions."
"I am a much more talented liar than I appear, my lady," Numina said quietly.
Frigga nodded. "I am counting on the fact that your mother taught you well." Numina stopped in her tracks, forcing the Queen to do so as well. "She was a master of the political game. I am hoping that you are as well."
Numina wasn't sure what to say. She did not enjoy using the skills her mother passed down, some more than others. Those skills were the reason Numina had become a healer, out of the childish hope that the benevolent skills would offset what Falare had taught her. "I…will do my best, my Queen," she stammered.
"No doubt you will do better than most,' Frigga said, before continuing onwards. "I am confident in your abilities even if you are not, though I suspect it is not a lack of confidence that holds you back."
Numina winced as the Queen saw the heart of the issue. A self-inflicted issue, one that Numina upheld for her sake as well as others. "You are most wise, Queen Frigga."
"If only my sons could see that," she said, chuckling at Numina's words before regaining a more serious composure. "Speaking of which, I should warn you about Loki. He is not overly…pleased with the arrangement I made without consulting him. He will most likely lash out, not in obvious ways but with methods that are much crueler than you might expect. This too, I apologize for."
"If Prince Loki does not wish to teach me, I do not need to be his apprentice."
"It is not for your sake alone that I assigned you to him," Frigga said. "You both fight similar battles." Numina looked at her questioningly. "I will say no more on the matter. Just trust my judgment. As I have said, I have many reasons for the things I do."
They stopped before too massive doors marked with dents of various sizes and angles protruding as though they had been struck from the other side. There was a time when the imperfections were smoothed away, yet it had become a task that needed to be performed every day. It was soon abandoned, the doors working the same as they ever did even with the battle scars.
"I will stay and watch your lesson with Loki today," Frigga said. "It should keep him from being too harsh and…tricky with you. Afterwards you will need to change into something for the banquet tonight." Numina nodded. "Loki will meet you at your chambers. He will be your escort for the evening."
"Not overly pleased?" she asked timidly.
"He did not voice it to me, but that would be a safe assumption." Frigga paused for a moment. "Wear the violet gown laced with gold tonight," she advised. "It is an elegant color and will make quite an impression. I will have one of my handmaidens pick out appropriate jewelry for it."
"I thought blue and silver were my colors?" Numina asked with a small smile.
Frigga grinned politely. "They are when you need subtle beauty and charm. Tonight we celebrate Thor's recovery…by your hands. You need to wear something that draws attention with stunning beauty and temptation."
The Queen's words brought a smile to her face. The subtle compliments were not lost on her and she enjoyed the idea of looking like royalty. All she had to do was make it through her first lesson with Loki and she could look like a princess, enjoying what good fortune her actions had brought her.
~~.O.~~
The excitement she had felt for the banquet had quickly turned into heart wrenching nervousness. Numina expected her chest to burst with how hard her heart was hammering. Though she did not want to admit it, Numina was terrified. Scenarios where she did something foolish, improper, or completely froze danced in her head. What if I completely forget the steps to a dance? she thought in terror. I will just have to politely decline every opportunity.
The handmaids that Frigga had lent worked busily to make Numina look the part of a lady-in-waiting. They brushed her hair until it was softer than the finest silks, leaving it in its long, naturally straight form to fall down to the middle of her back. A beautiful gold pin that twisted like branches held the bangs on the right back behind her ear, revealing the tear drop earrings featuring purple tourmaline framed by gold that matched the small necklace she wore about her neck. It was the gown that was most striking, however, a deep violet color that was much darker than the common shade. The gold accents swirled across the gown, much like you would attempt to draw wind if it were visible, though angled upwards slightly, following the flow of the fabric across the hem and following the low v of the chest.
Numina was a marvelous sight to behold, though she was not the one to think so. The servants that tended to her were shocked by her beauty. A plain an ordinary woman now looked like a queen of her own right. And they told her as much throughout the process, though Numina did not listen, brushing off their complements with thanks, unbelievingly. It was with a knock on the door that the handmaidens finally stopped fussing over Numina, opening the door for her to reveal her escort.
Loki looked regal, like the prince he was, standing proudly before her. His expression was blank, unwavering as he looked at Numina, emerald eyes revealing nothing. The formal attire he wore made him look dashing, black leather adorned in green and gold. He looked like the painting of those amongst a battlefield, beautiful despite the war raging. It was ceremonial only, yet Loki wore it as though he was ready to march against the world.
"A step up from the clothes you wore when we first encountered one another," he said almost accusingly.
"I didn't think blood stained rags would be appropriate," she tried, a small smirk added in hopes of managing some form of conversation.
His eyes shot her down, narrowing slightly at her. Loki did not respond, acting as if he were a statue. Rigidly, Loki extended his arm to Numina. He was to be her escort, but that did not mean he had to be polite and cordial with her. Under Numina's tender movements, Loki seemed tense and stiff.
The silence that haunted them as they walked was the worst form of awkwardness Numina had ever encountered, yet it did not seem to effect the Prince as he all but dragged her down the hall. His pace would not have normally been an issue if Numina had not been wearing a gown and heeled shoes. After nearly stumbling over her own dress, she finally spoke up.
"Would you mind slowing down a bit, my lord?" Numina asked politely, words soothingly soft. "I am afraid I might trip."
"Of course, my lady." The last of his words were unsettling, said as if it were an insult.
Numina cast her eyes to the side. She already felt like an interloper, Loki's use of her new title made it obvious that he thought the same as well. Any small shred of confidence she had before now turned to dust, replaced with a pounding heart and fear.
It meant nothing to her now, but the God of Mischief did slow his steps for her, allowing her to walk with much greater ease. Soon they found themselves standing before the entrance of the throne room. Before the banquet there was going to be a ceremony to honor those that had fallen during the war and to celebrate Thor's life that had been nearly snatched away.
Men and women clad in beautiful formal clothes mingled inside, speaking enthusiastically of the events planned for the night. Before the grand doors stood the adjutant, announcing those that were entering the throne room for those that had already arrived to hear and gossip about. Numina worked hard to control her breathing as she and Loki approached.
"Prince Loki," the adjutant greeted, offering a bow. "It is an honor to see you as always." Loki merely tipped his head in acknowledgement, treating the man as coldly as he was treating Numina. "Yes… and who is this beautiful woman that has the privilege of being escorted by a son of Odin?"
Numina was surprised that Loki even offered him an answer. "Numina, daughter of the late Falare. She is the healer who saved Thor, becoming both the Queen's lady-in-waiting and my apprentice." It was a calculating answer, though, devoid of any kind of emotion.
"Ah, yes," he said, offering Numina a small bow as well. "I apologize for not recognizing you, lady Numina."
"You would do well not to make the same mistake twice," Loki snapped bitterly before Numina could inform the adjutant that there was no harm done.
"Of course, you highness. I meant no disrespect."
Loki led Numina forward, again before she could say anything. They stood side by side, Numina's arm wound through Loki's, waiting for the adjutant to announce their arrival to the rest of the court.
"You did not need to be so cruel, my lord," Numina whispered to him.
Loki hummed amusingly to himself. "He is a fool, and I do not have patience for fools." He became deathly serious once more, though, turning his head towards her. "I am aware confidence has no place in the short list of your abilities, but do keep your head up and do not cower when the nobles turn their gaze on you. I will not look like an idiot because of your shy antics."
"I would never dream of doing such a thing, your highness," she said quietly, mimicking the way he spoke with lack of emotion.
Numina thought she saw Loki smirk out of the corner of her eye before he walked forward, escorting her into the throne room as the adjutant announced them.
"Prince Loki Odinson, brother of Prince Thor, Master of Magic and Illusions, escorting Lady Numina, lady-in-waiting to Queen Frigga, apprentice to Prince Loki, and the healer that saved Prince Thor's life."
All eyes turned towards them, or so it seemed to Numina. She held her composure, though, with confidence gained from the fact that she did not need to care what they thought of her at that moment. She only needed to worry afterwards, when some might approach her for conversation.
"He is nearly as talented of a liar as I am," Loki commented as they walked.
"Oh? Was he overstating your abilities, your highness?" Numina asked a slight glimmer of her own mischief adding a small amount of passive humor to the question.
"Hm." Loki wore the closest thing to a smile Numina had ever seen on him.
Frigga watched Numina and Loki as they entered, pleased with how they looked together. Both of them walked with rigidly formal finesse through the crowd, stature and attire complementary to one another unbeknownst to them. They looked good together, Numina the gentle beauty with fair skin and hair of light and Loki the subtly handsome yet mischievous darkness with kindness he did not acknowledge.
~~.O.~~
The ceremony had not taken long. There was a small vigil for the fallen after the King's magnificent speech of their valor and heroism. Afterwards, he spoke of the bravery his son, Thor, exhibited while fighting with the soldiers on the frontlines and how he had been willing to sacrifice himself for Asgard, nearly doing so when sly treachery sought to end his life with magic and a venom laced blade.
He did not mention Numina.
She was unsure if she was disappointed or relieved that her part in saving Thor's life, serving Asgard to the fullest of her abilities, was left unacknowledged. As the King's words were drawing to a close, Numina's eyes met the Queen's. Frigga offered her an apologetic look.
The remainder of the celebration was to be concluded in the dining hall, guests of various nobility ranks began filing their way out of the throne room. Numina lingered towards the back, not desiring to get lost amongst the bustling crowds. Suddenly her arm was nearly torn out of her socket, and she thrown off balance to one side. It was Loki. Rather abrasively, he had returned to be her escort once more.
"No sense in waiting on them," he commented sharply before guiding her to one of the side exits in the throne room. It allowed them to skip trying to make their way through the swirling masses, but it did make them more easily intercepted. Prince Thor stepped into their path, stopping them before they reached the dining hall. Loki didn't even try to hide his displeasure at the sight of his brother.
"This pretty little thing must be your knew apprentice." A gluttonous smile spreads as Thor's eyes began to wander lustfully down Numina's slender form, burning her skin with a searing and critical gaze. She felt naked under his eyes, the purple fabric offering her no comfort.
Soft rose petals tainted her fair skin, "I am Numina, your highness," she says courteously, a sharp breath stiffening her body, sealing away her nerves. Her dress flows about her as she pulls her arm from Loki's to offer the prince a curtsey with harsh grace.
"Now, now. There is no need for such formality. You are the Queen's lady-in-waiting, my brother's apprentice, and the beautiful woman I owe my life and thanks to, and as such, I would have you use my name. No doubt we will be becoming quite familiar with one other so much so that titles will become bothersome." His lips curved in a smile most women found intoxicating, but Numina could see the shameless glimmer in his eyes.
The boldness of his words and assumptions made her tense and fueled her nervousness. "As you wish...Thor."
Loki narrowed his eyes, emerald slits criticizing his brother. "She has not even been of any importance for more than a few days and you are already drooling over her as though you were looking into a mirror." His words oozed with venom, twisting around his brother like a snake with scales of polite etiquette.
Thor laughed at the insult, paying no more attention to it than he did his brother. His eyes remained fixed on the woman before him. "It is no fault of mine that your apprentice is quite lovely, and the fact that she can do marvelous wonders with her hands only adds to the perfection." The smirk he wore turned into a grin. Rough hands characterized by many battles reached for her own small ivory fingers. With an equally abrasive and gentle move, he pressed his lips to her knuckles. "I look forward to seeing more of you, my lady Numina," he added with a wink before turning to the dining hall.
Numina released a breath she had been holding the entire time. The encounter with the future King of Asgard was a nervous ordeal, especially when days earlier she had just barely saved his life. Numina had not expected Thor to be so…outlandish with his flirting. It couldn't be called courting since it was well known that he has courted many women in a similar fashion.
Loki also had been holding his breath, though he let out a small hiss of annoyance as they continued forwards. "Perhaps you will soon discover that you would have preferred to let the venom run its course," he added cruelly when his brother was out of earshot.
"You don't mean that," Numina said, surprisingly confident. Loki eyed her curiously, the scrutiny causing her to hastily cast her eyes downwards in her normal shy and timid state. She was not wrong.
Loki was continuously annoyed and infuriated by his brother, but he would never go so far as to wish death upon the bumbling oaf. Though the fact that Thor now lived, saved by the healing hands of a fair maiden did bring up problems. He would no doubt attempt to make this skittish girl his next conquest; and while Loki cared nothing for her, if he was going to teach her anything of his own magic, having her crying and pining over Thor would do nothing to improve his already thin patience with her.
Most would find Numina's timid and uncertain personality quite adorable or endearing. It irritated Loki, however. She was already marking herself as a victim with no backbone. He did not care for what would happen to her, but no doubt he would hear of the horrible things others did to take advantage of this sweet and innocent little thing. It was the Asgardian way for brutal strength and skill to take precedence in all aspects of life, to be favored above all. And although Loki preferred finesse and skill when it came to life, he respected the brutality of the culture because it was at least a method to stand on your own feet in defense at the very least. He saw no such strength in Numina other than the remarkable strength to annoy him more than Thor at the present moment.
With an audible sigh of impatience, Loki turned to the girl. "Some advice I expect you to follow:" he started harshly, "do not fall for whatever charm you might think my brother has. If you get involved with him, he will eventually leave you for another pretty face and you will foolishly be heartbroken." Numina raised her eyes to Loki once more. "Do not mistake this for caring," he added cruelly. "You are my apprentice for reasons other than my own desires and I will not have you sniveling after Thor in my presence."
Numina looked at Loki in shock. The reputation of the God of Mischief was not a good one, yet she had no idea that he would be so openly cruel. She did not let the surprise linger in her eyes, shutting the emotion down; but she did not look away from him as was expected. The quiet whispering trepidation that usually carried her speech faded. "Not all women find Thor's blatant and failing attempt at charm irresistible," she said matter-of-factly before giving the Prince Loki the bow that was deserving in formality only before walking towards the table that her new position as the Queen's lad-in-waiting and as Loki's apprentice had earned her.
Loki's eyes followed her as she left. The girl was a mystery. Was she annoyingly shy and innocent or confident? What he was slowly beginning to think was a façade had slipped twice, driving him to wonder if she was simply acting, tricking people into seeing and thinking of her in a way that would benefit her. Numina was a mystery to him for the moment. There was no doubt that he would eventually figure her out. He was, unfortunately, going to spend a decent amount of time with her in the days to come.
As he strode towards his place at the table of the Allfather and Queen, the people around him hushed their voices or stopped speaking mid-sentence completely. Though it looked as though the God of Lies paid no heed to any of those around him, everyone knew to watch what you say in his presence. Prince Loki had a habit of guessing your secrets hidden in polite words and turning them against you.
Loki took his seat beside Thor, critical eyes surveying the decedent hall before him. He looked uninterested and disgusted with having to attend such a frivolous event outwardly, but secretly he enjoyed the politics that would inevitably flow off of tongues. It was a great game of gaining favor and spreading rumor, of subtlety and a convenient lack thereof. It was one of the few battle of wits in Asgard, and Loki enjoyed the game, especially since very few matched his skill.
Numina made a point not to look at him as she took her seat. No doubt he would read it as an attempt to either understand him or make sure that she was not displeasing him. Numina would not give him the satisfaction of thinking that she would go out of her way to please him. Instead she offered polite smiles to the Warriors Three and Lady Sif. They were eager to talk, asking questions about her past, her family, and Fandral no so subtly asking after her…availability.
"No doubt you'll have to battle the Mighty Thor to claim this fair lady," Volstagg bellowed though a mouth full of food.
Fandral frowned, turning up his nose. "Honestly, you sit before one of the most beautiful women in the Nine Realms yet you cannot help but regurgitate nearly half of what you stuff in your face." He turned and winked at Numina, "And for you my dear, I would find the strength to easily best Thor."
Beside her, Sif groaned at his ridiculous comment. Numina simply smiled at him, though there was mischief gleaming in her eyes. "You will have to be sure to see me afterwards, my lord," she said, voice alluringly toying with him. "It would be a shame if Mjolnir were to permanently damage your only asset, and perhaps in healing it I may actually improve your looks as well." She waved her hand towards him before reaching for her glass of wine. A smirk teased the corners of her mouth.
The smile on Fandral's face did not falter as both Sif and Volstagg burst into laughter. Even Hogun the Grim chuckled lightly at the small joke. Numina allowed herself to chuckle as well, though much quieter than the rambunctious warriors.
"Rapier wit and beauty," Fandral continued. "You are truly intoxicating."
The mischief had not left her eyes. "I think the fumes from your burning cloak are finally getting to you, actually," she said nonchalantly, taking another sip from her wine glass.
Eyes that once held mirth and amusement now widened in confusion, "My burning what-?" He looked down at the end of his cloak, realization taking its time. Blue flames were eating away at the fabric slowly. Fandral jumped out of his chair, nearly knocking it over as he rushed to stamp the fire out. A few members of the court that were seated nearby looked over to see what the commotion was, but most were used to the warriors common ruckus and paid no mind.
Fandral let out an overly dramatic sigh as he retook his seat. Volstagg clapped him on the shoulder with a greasy hand. "I believe that means she's not interested, my friend," he joked.
"It means that I need a new cloak," he corrected, flashing Numina one last smirk.
Lady Sif laughed when she saw Numina roll her eyes at Fandral's continued attention. "That was a very good attempt to dissuade his interest, lady Numina," she said, "but after spending so much time with Loki when accompanying Thor, we are all used to such tricks. It will take quite of bit to surprise us with magic."
"I like a challenge," Numina said playfully, taking another drink, actively turning the alcohol to water before it reached her lips.
"You stole the words right out of my mouth, darling," Fandral added, throwing as much charm into the words as he could.
"Enough!" Volstagg said heartily, nudging Fandral, "Let the poor lass enjoy the rest of the meal without your relentless advances. No doubt she is weary of them."
He did not turn his attention from Numina, locking his eyes on her, "Until later then," he said. "Perhaps you would honor me with a dance?"
The tension and fear she felt earlier in the presence of Thor and Loki had all but vanished from her. With how candidly the people she was now seated with spoke, she was no longer afraid of doing or saying the wrong thing. Numina was able to relax and even have a bit of fun for the first time since she set foot in the palace.
Numina set down her wine glass. "I will need six more of those in order to be comatose enough to do that."
The entire table erupted in merry laughter once more, Fandral and Numina included.
Emerald eyes continued to watch the table. The girl was proving to be even more of a mystery. She was still quiet and shy in her demeanor, yet she had handled Fandral's advances with jokes. Lighting his cloak on fire was a nice touch, if not a bit less than what he deserved, Loki admitted, comparing the way Fandral leaned in towards Numina to the way Volstagg did with his many plates of food.
It was almost as if she had felt his gaze, her pale blue eyes meeting his. He was smirking in slight amusement before he quickly threw his attention elsewhere. Numina found the God of Mischief curious, not at all what she expected. He was much darker than she would have imagined in both looks and actions. More roaring laughter quickly drew her from her thoughts and she continued to converse with the warriors at the table, opening up slightly to them, her future friends.
~~.O.~~
Author's Note:
Alright. My first attempt at writing fanfiction about Loki, my favorite Avenger. I typically write fanfiction about worlds that already exist, and this is my first attempt at AU, so please let me know what you think. I appreciate any and all comments and reviews.
Something to note: I absolutely cannot stand the formal attire they had Loki wear in the first Thor movie for the coronation and when he was King, so any and all clothing I describe for Loki will be incredibly similar to what he wore before, during, and immediately after Jontunheim. It will be like this for any of the following chapters as well.
Thank you for Reading!