They know what day it is.
They know exactly what day it is.
They know it the moment their eyes open in the early hours of the morning.
It's June 5th.
His are staring up at his bland ceiling whilst hers are staring down at the floor of her very new and very empty house.
They sigh heavily as they try to hold back the inevitable tears that will eventually fall at some point today.
They both know exactly what happened on this day two years ago.
Two years.
Twenty-four months, one hundred and four weeks, seven hundred and thirty days... all that time ago was when they both lost something.
They both lost something so pure, so precious and so irreplaceable that their worlds haven't been the same since… no matter how hard they try to pretend.
They lost a baby.
A baby girl, a baby girl that maybe… just maybe, could have saved them.
She's lying on a sofa because that's all furniture she has right now.
He's lying on the bed where he normally sleeps but tonight it feels exceptionally lonely.
She tries to pull the blanket over her head so everything is pitch black and she can at least try get back to sleep.
He rolls over onto his stomach and tries to make himself comfortable because it's only three am and he knows he shouldn't get up yet.
Neither one of them have much luck.
Neither one can believe the horrendous turn of events that have brought them to the place that they are in today.
She got married in the end.
He still has the girlfriend.
Everything is still very… very wrong.
She's moved away now, she's in Devon without her husband, not actually knowing if he even is her husband anymore because her husband said he was getting their marriage annulled.
He's heard all about it of course, from Leanne who heard all about it from her sister who was at the wedding it self. He can't believe it, not a single word and yet he knows it must be true because then he hears it from his Dad.
She hates Devon, she hates it with a passion and no matter how much she tells herself she'll get used to it she knows she never will, even now after a week has gone by, she still feels just as wretched as she did when she had first got there. It's not somewhere she wants to be... not today... not alone.
He hates the way he couldn't stop thinking about her from the moment he found out she's moved away alone. He doesn't know where but he heard that she left the place they once called home all on her own and all he could do is try and discover where.
They both get up at around Seven am in the end, when the sun is high in the sky, shining brightly down on the world as if today is going to be a perfect day.
They both know there is no point in trying to get back to sleep because their minds are already too consumed in what today means for them.
She knows no one in Devon, no one at all. She has no one and she fells all alone in the world.
He knows quite a lot of people in Portsmouth by this point, he's been there for more than a year and yet he also feels all alone.
She gets dressed in all black to match her mood and leaves at around seven thirty am, she doesn't have a clue where she is going as she's still relatively new to the area but she doesn't care, she has to get out.
He gets dressed in black also and he can't stand how empty his place is now that his son has gone back to Manchester so he goes out too because he needs to escape the four walls which feel like they are closing in on him.
She soon finds herself at a beach and aimlessly treads across the sand. She knows that right now she should be hand in hand with her husband in Paris but then… no… she shakes her head, she shakes her head and knows that deep down, where she really wants to be is home. Home with her baby… her little girl.
He lights a cigarette as he crosses the road and heads to the local park where he sometimes goes to clear his head and as he walks through it he wonders how life might be if what happened those two years ago hadn't happened at all.
They might have been still together.
It could have happened.
It might have happened.
Maybe the birth of their baby girl might have brought them back together and who knows, maybe they might be living blissfully together on Rosamund Street without a care in the world or maybe they would have moved somewhere bigger after all.
Maybe… just… maybe.
She thinks about it too, she thinks maybe if their baby had of been born they could have maybe had a future together after all.
They both sigh and shake their heads.
They both know better than to cling onto maybes.
She thinks about how she felt when she first found out she was pregnant, how scared she was and how she almost decided to end it.
He thinks about how much of a let down he was when she told him, how lacklustre his response was and how he should have shouted from the rooftops at the fact that he and his beautiful wife had created life.
She remembers how quickly she became a mother, how soon she started to love the little life that was growing inside her and then, suddenly, she stops in the middle of the beach and screams out loud because only a week or so ago in front of everyone she was told that she wasn't a mother. She was told that she could never understand how it felt to be a mother when in reality she had become a mother the moment she'd decided to keep her baby.
He remembers the moment she came in with that pink teddy bear for their baby, he remembers how adorable she looked when she held it in front of his face and he remembers how much she wanted their little girl to have it in her cot when she was born.
She thinks about how quickly it came and went, how it felt like one minute she was happily pregnant and how they next she was in mourning. She knows that even though it caused her a great deal of pain, she would do it all over again because was grateful for every minute she spent with that life inside her because now... now it looked as if she'd never get that chance again.
He thinks about the terrifying moment he saw her collapse on the street, the moment he feared that she and their baby were in danger, he remembers how hopeless he felt and the way he walked into that room and pitifully rested his head on her stomach. He remembers how strong she was, how she didn't push him away from her and how she let him just lie there with her.
Tears began to fall down both of their cheeks.
She knows people are watching her almost have a breakdown, one person even comes closer to see if she's alright but she just wipes the tears from her eyes and walks on.
He knows there are people staring, staring at the grown man who is almost in tears but he doesn't care, he walks on too, he walks on and on until he's circled the whole park twice and is by a canal which leads to a river when he finally stops he cries out loud because the pain is just too much for him to hold on to anymore.
She wonders what he is doing, whether he is with this new girlfriend. She knows for sure that there is no way he has forgotten what today is because she knows he was just as broken as she was when it happened but she wonders if maybe he is trying to forget... maybe he is pretending everything is okay.
He's tortured by thoughts of what she is doing today. He hopes she isn't on her own but realises she must be. He hopes she isn't in tears somewhere out there but he knows she must be, he prays that she is okay but he knows she can't be.
She stares out at sea for what must be ages, she's stood in the same spot just gazing in the distance.
He stares ahead at the canal before him and can't seem to tear himself away.
They are one hundred and thirty miles away from each other but this is probably the closest they've been in a very long time.
Today they have the same thoughts, regrets, wishes and dreams.
Today they both cry, they both shout and they both secretly wish that they could be with each other but only for today of course.
After all, She still hasn't forgiven him for cheating on her and he still has a girlfriend.
She still loves the man she married last week and he had made peace with the fact that she'd moved on but as they both stare into the empty distance ahead of them they both know that somewhere out there… is the other.
She shakes her head as the wind picks up and she heads back into the direction that she thinks is her new home.
He miserably lights another cigarette as he turns around and heads back towards his flat.
She walks and walks until some how she makes it back to her house, she looks at the car that she's currently renting and she thinks about driving somewhere. She thinks about the only person in the world right now who is going through the same thing she is right now and all she wants is to see him.
He fights every single alcoholic urge in his body and manages to walk past that pub he sees every day on the way home from work and he makes sure he does it quickly, he tries desperately hard not to wish that when he gets back to his flat that by some miracle she's there waiting for him because he knows how ridiculous that would be.
She doesn't know his address. She doesn't know where he lives but she could know… she could find out… if she really wanted to she could call his Dad… maybe ask him but then she realises what it would look like. She knows it would like she's just on the rebound, like she's just running to him because of everything that has happened last week and she doesn't want his Dad to think that of her so... she doesn't find out where he lives.
He doesn't return home to find her on his doorstep, instead he returns home to an empty flat, one that right now could really use some people in it.
They both look at the clocks on their walls and it's excruciating for them to see that it's only just gone nine in the morning.
They both felt like they'd been out for hours and yet it had barley been two.
They both sniff hard and shake there heads in despair because they know that today… today is going to be a very, very long day.