Hey, thanks for reading. This is an extremely dark one shot. There are a lot of drug, and sexual references. Do not read if you are too young!
Disclaimer: They aren't mine.
Tell me if you guys like it, I might write more, but I am really busy with school. I'm applying to med schools this fall.
It is the same every time. Most of the time she doesn't finish, but she doesn't care about that. She does it for a different feeling. The waves of self-pity and self hate go away, just for that short amount of time. They meet in the morning, the same time everyday.
She closes her eyes and thinks back to the day when it all changed. The day he changed.
::knock knock::
Hmmm... that's strange, I wasn't expecting anyone, Amelia thinks to herself.
"Sheldon?"
"She's dead, Miranda died this morning," Sheldon mutters. He isn't crying, but his cheeks are tear stained and it is obvious he had been.
"Sheldon, I'm so sorry," Amelia says as she moves away from the door to allow him to come in.
The rest is somewhat of a blur. Amelia remembers a lot of crying, and then it just happened.
Sheldon would come over everyday after that day. He wouldn't say much, most of the time they just stared at each other, until the day that changed. Amelia was never the sentimental type, she was not very good in situations like this. She was usually the one having a tragedy. Actually, the day after he told her the news, Amelia got high. It wasn't like he would notice, at least not for awhile. She had been trying to deal with the fact that James left her a few weeks before Miranda even died, and after Sheldon's news, well, Amelia couldn't take it anymore. She decided that was a good way to justify her newfound love for Hydrocodone, switching from Oxycodone she didn't think she would like it much. However, she was pleasantly surprised.
Amelia rolled over in bed and stared at the clock. The harsh green numbers glared right back at her: 5:50 a.m. Sheldon will be here soon, she thought to herself.
Forcing herself out of bed, she went and unlocked the door for Sheldon and then crawled back into bed. It wouldn't be long now.
Ten minutes later, she heard the front door open, and close. She sometimes fantasized that maybe it was a murderer with a gun instead of Sheldon. He could shoot her in the head, and in one shot all of her pain would be gone. However, it was never the murderer with a gun, and it was always Sheldon.
Half of the time he didn't even say hello, he would come over to the bed and pull her up. She did this willingly of course, she wanted it as much as he did. They never did it in the bed. She would bend over, and Sheldon would enter her from behind. It was extremely painful much of the time, he never really attempted to make her wet. Some lube on himself, and in he went.
They never did it facing each other. It was always from behind. Bent over, laying on her stomach, on her knees, but never looking at each other. Amelia accepted this, she actually preferred it this way. She wasn't entirely sure if she could keep continuing with it if she were looking Sheldon in the eyes. Amelia assumed Sheldon felt the same way, but he never actually told her that.
"Hey," Sheldon says as he opened the door. Oh wow, a hello today.
"Hey," Amelia responded. She stood up from her warm sheets and walked over to the wall where she steadied herself with her hands. She bent over to allow Sheldon to enter her.
Sheldon always did this very quickly, one thrust and he was inside of her. This was always the most painful part. He began to move more quickly and harder. Amelia clenches her fists against the wall as Sheldon inches closer to orgasm. They barely made any sounds. The occasional groan from Sheldon, and sigh of pain from Amelia, but that was all each other would allow.
When it was over, Sheldon slid out of Amelia. He said the usual, "see you at work," and he left.
Amelia went into the bathroom to shower. She allowed the extremely hot water to soothe her aching body. It was the same everyday, after her shower she popped her morning pill. Forty-five minutes until she would feel better. It would only be forty-five more minutes of pain.
As she locked her front door, she could feel the pill start to work. The pills worked to get her through her day, and Sheldon was there for her mornings. She wondered what would eventually break the cycle, but she couldn't focus on that now. When it finally does break, she doesn't know if she will make it.
But, for now, it works.
Most of the time she doesn't finish, but she doesn't care about that.