Once upon a time,
there was a handsome evil wizard called Voldemort
and he kidnapped a beautiful but filthy muggle mudblood called Hermione
he locked her away in his marble tower and did not feed her and called
her names like "Mudblood" and "inferior"
and he had full intentions to kill her
But one day he accidentally got a noodle in his eye
and instead he feel deeply in love with her
The Voldemort and his pet horxcruxe muggle: he dubbed
her Hermione Horxcruxe Granger
the end