A/N: Hi all! I'm taking a short break from writing the large story I have posted here on FF and I came up with this one in the mean time. Well, this started as a one shot, but the more I continued on it the more it grew! BUT ... I'm keeping it as a shorty! This is supposed to be total humor and Dante and Vergil might be a bit OOC. Although it may be totally lame and utterly pointless, I hope you still enjoy it anyway!

Devil May Cry and the characters Dante & Vergil property of Capcom. Story idea and OC's belong to me.

Yours Truly,

N.

Devil's Retreat

"Dude, c' mon!"

"No."

"Aw, c' mon."

"No."

"Vergil!"

"No."

No matter how much Dante pleaded with his brother, Vergil was unwilling to cooperate with his plan.

"Why not, Verg?" Dante whined.

"Simply put, camping is not my forte. I have no desire to be one with nature," Vergil closed his eyes and stated with a scowl as he folded his arms in final determination.

"But you wouldn't be one with nature. Dude, I got us a sweet cabin!" Dante retorted with excitement. "And, you'd be one with the lovely Beth," Dante slyly stated as he winked and jabbed Vergil with his elbow.

Vergil sighed a response saying, "Yes, and on that subject, I have no desire to be the mercy date to the friend of the female you are trying to seduce or as you stated earlier, 'tap that a–' "

"Dammit Vergil! Will you just do this for me?" Dante interrupted. "Ya know she won't let me take her to the cabin alone."

"Smart girl," Vergil replied with a raised eyebrow.

"Look, she said as long as I hooked up her friend to come along, then she'd go."

"No."

"Ugh! You're impossible, you know that?" Dante furrowed his brow and grunted at his brother.

"Not impossible, just indomitable."

"Whatever."

Dante thought for a moment, then as the forty watt bulb went off in his head he smirked and said, "Ok, look, if you do this for me I swear I'll pay you back."

"I don't need you're monetary contribution, besides your broke anyway."

"No, I mean I'll do a favor. Anything. Just ask," Dante smirked.

Vergil glanced over to where Dante was standing and raised his brow. A slight curl appeared on his upper lip. "Anything?" he slyly repeated.

Dante didn't like the tone in his voice. He knew the wicked thoughts that swam in his brother's head. He paused a moment, thinking about what he had just offered, but the temptation of having his way with the current tart of choice at a secluded cabin was too much for the young horny devil.

"Well, yeah, anything. Name it," Dante hesitantly confirmed.

Vergil closed his eyes and rubbed his chin in deep thought for a moment. Oh the delight Vergil took in Dante's offer. As he thought about what he would request of his brother in exchange for his cooperation in this escapade, he rather pitied the fact as to how ruled Dante was by his human hormones. Foolish.

Dante stood there becoming more impatient as the seconds went by.

"C' mon, don't keep me in suspense," Dante sourly taunted.

Just then Vergil opened his eyes with a hint of a devilish grin on his face.