So I'm nervous to begin writing again after finishing Goodbye, My Lover. I wonder if I could ever again achieve such a wonder as that ever again. After numerous failed beginnings, I just told myself to go for it. Once more, I hope to enchant you with another story about my favorite Degrassi characters. Thanks so much for choosing to read this. I hope it proves worthy in your eyes.
So with that thought, I humbly present you...
The Perception
Prologue.
The page is still blank.
It has been two hours since Clare sat down at her desk and her black pall point pen has yet to touch the red lined sheets. The fingers of her left hand tap impatiently; they want to be matched in fervor by their twin in movement. But alas, her right hand is still.
Her mind is silent. Or maybe it's just moving too fast for Clare to be able to recognize everything. All the intricacies of her memories and wishes threading together like a patchwork quilt meant to wrap her in comfort. But this wasn't a quilt of a comfort. This was a noose created by different strings of intertwined by a common word.
Clare...
Her past shouldn't be this- this creeping feeling of fingers reaching toward her throat as she feels a tightening in her stomach.
Shhh...Clare, just breathe.
But she doesn't want to. Because breathing is just one step closer to living. One step closer to feeling. And she's not ready to awaken those emotions from their depths where she's so neatly buried them in little graves inside her heart and mind.
She gets up out of the wooden chair and heads to her bed. Pulling off the two large comforters to keep her warm during these winter months, she finally reaches the rough white sheets. She pulls those back and brings her body up into the bed. Her white socks slide down underneath followed by her jean-clad legs. And then she pulls the sheets and the two comforters back over her all the way.
Her whole body is covered underneath the layers. It's comforting to be buried underneath the heat.
Her back shivers in sweet anticipation. Her eyes are closed leaving her senses more alive than ever.
A single finger makes contact with her shoulder and slowly traces its curve. A second finger is added as that same finger travels to her shoulder blade. And then a third finger joins as they glide up her spine. They break contact from her just for a second to brush away a few curls that have settled on her right shoulder. The cool electricity emitting from the touch keeps the static thrill alive on her left shoulder as a pair of lips tenderly kiss the curve between her neck and right shoulder.
A breath escapes from her that she didn't know she'd been holding.
A small smile begins to form in the corner of Clare's pink lips. Her right hand reaches to touch it; to prove its existence.
But then just like that, the tide turns and the world spins and her mind won't quit.
A thick thumb is forced against her lips, clenching them together with brute force.
She closes her eyes and wills the world to turn dark.
It's already dark underneath the covers, but she snaps her eyes shut. Her own private darkness.
She sees nothing but she feels everything.
She covers her mouth with her hand to muffle the sound.
Shh...Clare, just breathe.
Just breathe.
And she does what she's told.
This will be our little secret.
And so she keeps quiet.
Please Review. All comments, thoughts, and judgements during this early stage is greatly appreciated. And as always, feel free to check out my other work. I'm sure you'll find something that will delight you.