Title: The Beginning of After
Author: MysteriousSwaggerOfScrubs
Pairing: Alison DiLaurentis/Emily Fields
Rating: M
Summary: What really happens after the camera stops rolling and before it begins? With glimpses into their texts, phone calls, and private video chats, will that be enough for Alison and Emily to keep their marriage alive?
Disclaimer: All television shows, books, movies, songs, and other copyrighted material referred to in this work and the characters, events, and settings thereof are the properties of their respective owners. As this work is an interpretation of the original material and not for profit, it constitutes fair use. Reference to real persons, places, or events are made in a fictional context and are not intended to be libelous, defamatory, or in any way factual.
AN: I first want to apologize to the followers of Skinny Love. Right now, I seem to have lost my motivation and inspiration for writing that story, but I'm hoping that getting the ideas for this story, written for a completely new fandom and relationship, will help recharge my Skinny Love writing soul. This is my first leap into the land of Emison, Pretty Little Liars, and PLL: The Perfectionists, and I really hope that I am able to do it justice. As always, please let me know what you think. I very much appreciate all of your questions, comments, and reviews.
AN 2: Sending a huge thank you to Palmettocalzona for her help with writing and encouraging this fic. You're the best!
Chapter One
Present Day…
It was late. The sun had set long ago and, with the twinkle of nighttime stars barely visible above glowing runway lights, Alison DiLaurentis pensively sat, uneasily waiting for her plane to arrive, her thoughts a million miles away, wholly lost in a tumultuous state of what ifs.
What if she had turned down this unbelievable offer?
What if Emily eventually decided that this was too much for herself and their twins?
What if all these feelings of remorse and guilt never went away?
What if she was turning into her own parents, abandoning her children when they needed her most?
Quickly realizing that this unexpected downtime was doing nothing more than making her already suffocating anxiety grow - the reality of her departure becoming even more difficult to bear - Alison decided to make her way toward the airport's small cafe, desperately hoping to find some form of alcohol to help assuage her quickly surmounting guilt.
Thankfully, the cafe was still open and, though there wasn't an extensive selection from which to choose, she quickly decided on a glass of Pinot Noir. And, softly thanking the bartender, Alison then brought the stemless glass to her lips, drawing a long sip of the deep, burgundy liquid and wholeheartedly welcoming its soothing impact on her quickly unraveling nerves.
But, try as she might, each sip barely helped to placate any of the restless disquietude that was relentlessly continuing to grow and, in the end, she quickly realized that absolutely no amount of alcohol on the planet was ever going to be able to rid her of the feeling that she was a failure - that she had completely forsaken the ones she loved.
As she sat with nothing to occupy her other than her racing thoughts, Alison couldn't help but think back on the day she had asked permission to marry her wife - the day she had approached Pam Fields - standing confident and proud, honestly confessing her feelings for the older woman's only child - feelings she had stupidly attempted to deny for far too long. That day, Alison had made up her mind that she was tired of running - completely exhausted of denying the fact that she needed Emily in her life - that she had been hopelessly in love with the dark-haired beauty since they were fourteen years old.
Then, her mind's eye flashed to their wedding day where, in front of all their family and friends, she wholeheartedly and lovingly had vowed to be the safe place for Emily's heart, to show her love and patience in both good times and in bad, to tenderly hold her hand as they built a life together.
But now, after nearly a year of marriage and two and a half years of time spent vehemently loving and devotedly nurturing the lives of their undeniably adorable twins, Alison was leaving it all behind.
It had been a complete surprise when a mysterious letter had arrived in the mail, offering the potential for a full scholarship to Beacon Heights University near Portland, Oregon. Alison initially had chosen to pay the mailing absolutely no mind, but after only a couple days, her curiosity had quickly gotten the better of her.
How could she not explore her options at the very least?
How could she not apply?
She and Emily lived comfortably, but who in their right mind could possibly pass up an opportunity that would help to provide so much more for their family.
For their children.
For each other.
Because, let's face it, a completely unexpected offer of a full scholarship to one of the most prestigious schools in the United States?
Unheard of.
Emily had been supportive throughout the entire application process - at times, Alison thought, a little too supportive. And, when the final decision had been made - when Alison had received the correspondence stating that she would indeed be accepted to this highly esteemed school, with little to no strings attached, Alison had wept with guilt, with unease, and with shame.
How could she possibly leave her family - the wife she loved and the children she adored?
Never in her life had she felt so torn.
Alison always had wanted to go back to school after receiving her baccalaureate teaching degree. Instead, however, she had chosen to take on the insurmountable responsibility of caring for Charlotte. Then came Charlotte's death and her own marriage to a con artist husband. That debacle immediately was followed by her being drugged and committed, prior to her best friends having the fateful responsibility of running down and killing said husband with a car.
Then, as if all of that wasn't enough, she had found out that she was pregnant - violated in ways she never thought possible.
But, how could she possibly have gotten rid of Emily's babies. Emily was the purest soul she knew and any child belonging to her would be a joy and a pleasure to welcome into the world.
And they were.
Lily and Grace were the absolute light of her life, the proverbial apples of her eye.
Alison wholeheartedly cherished being the mother other those two little girls; she absolutely revered the life she had built alongside her wife - there was never a moment of doubt or regret for the decisions she'd made after Alex and Mary had been removed from their lives.
Continuing to sip at her wine, Alison momentarily debated retrieving her "Welcome to BHU" packet from where it currently was stored in her carry-on bag, but knowing that her mind was nowhere near settled enough to retain even the smallest inkling of information that might lie within, she instead chose to thoroughly scour over the moments she had shared with Emily and the girls in the days leading up to this night.
Two days ago...
With her mouth held shockingly agape in the wake of the statement she had just made, Emily quickly made her way into the living room to look out the window. And, sorrowfully watching as Alison, pushing a double stroller, disappeared down the street, Emily blew out a frustrated puff of air, wanting so badly to march right out the front door in order to follow.
But, after all these years, Emily knew that wouldn't be good - she currently was too unsettled, Alison was clearly hurt and angry - and if they talked to each other right now, it would almost certainly make matters so very much worse.
To Emily, it seemed that even after months and months of planning and preparation, the reality of Alison's impending departure unanticipatedly had just come crashing down around them, Emily's attitude toward the entire situation abruptly morphing from supportive and encouraging to accusatory and contrite.
Because, in Emily's mind, the fact remained - no matter the reason - Alison was still leaving her.
She purposely was choosing to run.
Again.
Even after everything they had worked so hard to achieve.
Alison was leaving their babies - the nearly three-year-old little girls who had inextricably changed her, turning her into the amazing mom she currently was today.
Sighing in defeat, Emily dejectedly headed toward the kitchen and, grabbing the beer she now suddenly craved, she soon found herself wholeheartedly unable to stomach it. Her heart ached, her nerves were completely frayed and, with a mirthless chuckle falling from her lips, Emily headed into the hallway, suddenly stopping to look at the many photos that graced the picture frames along the wall.
A picture of Alison and the twins napping on the couch.
Alison, Pam, and the girls holding up a cake they had made for Emily's last birthday.
Aria, Alison, Spencer, and the twins at the Please Touch Museum in Philadelphia.
Emily and Alison facing each other and holding hands, loving smiles on both of their faces - Emily's most favorite shot from their wedding day.
Hanna and her baby, snuggled in a hotel bed with the twins, reading a book.
Lily and Grace in between Alison and Emily, both women laying a kiss on a cherubic cheek, each toddler with a massive grin on her face.
Smiling in earnest at that last one, Emily soon felt her disappointment, anger, and frustration slowly beginning to drain. She had been trying her damnedest to remain understanding of Alison's needs - supportive of her wife's desire to finally get out of Rosewood and leave the mean girl she was in high school behind her.
But, as the days had passed, the overwhelming reality setting in, Emily couldn't help but worry that it really was something more - that Alison had grown tired of living a normal life with her and their twins.
Heavily sighing as she looked down at her watch, Emily noted that Alison and the girls had now been gone for twenty minutes.
That was a long enough time-out, right?
Ultimately deciding that twenty minutes simply would have to do, Emily grabbed her phone and her keys. And, gently shutting the front door behind her, she desperately hoped that she was wrong - that Alison was not deliberately choosing to run away from everything beautiful they had worked so hard together to achieve.
With Lily and Grace carefully strapped into their favorite playground swings, Alison's lips curved into a sad smile as she pushed the excitedly squealing little girls higher and higher, her racing thoughts solely focused on the angry looking, dark haired beauty she had just left, furiously stewing, in the living room of their home.
Alison really could not believe that Emily still did not trust her, her heart aching with the need for Emily to please just understand. She would never leave her family without a good reason and an even more meticulously implemented plan, and this unfathomably prodigious opportunity that had mysteriously fallen into her lap seemed to be just about the only reason that she would.
Alison had promised Emily that she would fly home once a month and during any scheduled school break; they already had planned for Emily and the girls to fly to Oregon to spend the entire winter break once the fall semester and Emily's coaching for the year was complete. Emily initially had seemed satisfied with all of this - she had 100% agreed and had even helped to facilitate their plans - but, after suffering through the venomous words Emily had just so easily spewed, Alison now knew that this was going to be so much more difficult - that it had so many more layers - than it originally had seemed.
Emily still did not trust her and, if she were honest, that hurt most of all.
Noting movement to her left, Alison quickly looked over in that direction, instantly spying the presence of her melancholy looking wife as she slowly lowered herself onto a bench. Alison couldn't help but notice how thoroughly downtrodden Emily now looked, lines of worry now present on her usually resplendent face.
So, with their joyous swinging coming to an abrupt end, Alison carefully removed the girls from their respective swings before settling them - safe and sound - in a nearby sandbox so they could continue to play. Then, cautiously heading in Emily's direction, Alison tried her best to fortify her already tattered nerves, armoring herself for the continued argument she knew was about to ensue.
"Hey," she softly said as she reached the bench, cautiously sitting down next to Emily, purposely leaving a good amount of distance between them, as if they were mere acquaintances, not lovers and lifelong friends.
"Hey," Emily softly answered back, her eyes never leaving her tangled hands as she wrung them together against her lap.
With a suffocatingly tense moment of silence passing between them, saddened brown eyes sluggishly looked upward into already glistening, bright blue before Emily earnestly began to speak. "Ali, of course you're the girls' mother. What I said - I. . .I was angry, and frustrated, and it just. . .came out wrong. I know you haven't taken this decision to leave lightly. You absolutely are their mom, and I never meant to imply otherwise."
Uncomfortably shifting in her seat, Alison sighed. "I know that," she simply replied and, somehow forcing her gaze to remain firm, she dutifully looked Emily straight in the eyes. "But, you clearly don't trust me, Em. Even after all these years and everything we've been through, you still don't trust that I'm here for you - that Alison DiLaurentis has the ability to love and the capacity to stay."
Immediately opening her mouth to argue, Emily's voice suddenly failed her, the overwhelming silence completely confirming what Alison had just said.
Emily knew there was no sense in denying it, Alison knew her too well and, saying the only thing she could - responding with the absolute truth - Emily finally found the courage to speak. "I love you so much, Ali. Please know that."
Resolutely nodding her head, Alison's lips slightly curved into a skeptical smile. "I do know that, Emily. I do. But, I really need you to trust me, too."
"I'm not going."
Alison's voice didn't once falter as she vehemently spoke those words later that night. After the argument they'd had earlier and the profound realization that had come along with it, she had made up her mind, and though they were nearing the eleventh hour, she now knew exactly what she needed to do.
She absolutely could not leave with things between herself and Emily as they currently were. She was scheduled to get on a plane in less than two days, with nothing but a better future for herself and her family in her sights, but now, she simply could not do it. Losing Emily over this - or traumatizing their girls - was not worth it to her; she didn't have to go back to school right now, she could wait and do it at a later date.
Hesitantly glancing over her shoulder from where she currently stood pulling a fresh pair of pajamas from their chest of drawers, Emily visibly swallowed, her emotions an incongruent dichotomy of what she desperately wanted and what she already knew she needed to do. And, taking a brief moment to gather her thoughts, she carefully set her pajamas to the side before completely turning to face her wife.
"Come here," Emily tenderly said, anxiously waiting to see if Alison would do just that.
Taking a moment to remove the reading glasses she'd only recently begun to wear from where they currently rested atop the bridge of her nose, Alison silently watched her wife for a little while, considering her for a moment before hesitantly moving in Emily's direction, the staunch reserve she'd initially been feeling, quickly beginning to dissolve.
When Alison was only a few steps away, Emily gently reached out, deep olive palms, lovingly gracing alabaster hands with their benevolent embrace. "You need to do this, Ali. You have to do this," she earnestly tried to insist. "One of the most prestigious schools in the United States sought you out and is offering you a full ride."
With a skeptical huff and a characteristic roll of brilliant, cornflower eyes, Alison suddenly felt so confused and so torn; she had absolutely no idea what the right thing was to do. She was exhausted of everyone constantly repeating the obvious, when all she really wanted to hear was how they truly felt.
"I want so much for us, Em," Alison earnestly beseeched.
Gently reaching upward to brush back wayward, blonde hair that had escaped her wife's messy bun, Emily ruefully smiled as she honestly spoke. "Me, too, Ali. Me too."
One Day Ago...
With her bare back urgently landing against the plush duvet covering the bed she had shared with Alison for the better part of three years, a deep moan uncontrollably emanated from the back of Emily's throat as she watched a completely naked Alison straddle her prostrate form, a talented mouth immediately latching onto the sensitive flesh covering her clavicle before making its way below.
Neither woman could believe this was Alison's last night in Rosewood - their very last night sharing a bed with each other for the foreseeable future.
How had almost a year since they had begun discussing this move as an option completely escaped them? To where had ten entire months disappeared?
With Lily and Grace safely tucked into their beds, Alison and Emily were now alone, aroused, cornflower eyes quickly locking with darkened brown in a silent promise that - despite the distance - she was willing and ready to do whatever necessary to keep their marriage alive. And, with each passing kiss, nip, lick, and caress, it was blatantly obvious to Emily that Alison wanted to possess her - to remove any notion or fear that they had made the wrong decision. That, even with Alison all the way on the other side of the country for extended periods of time, their love would endure - their connection completely unfazed.
And, with the enormity of that fact taking over her senses and combining with the physical pleasure Alison was currently bestowing upon her body, Emily's tremulous hands moved from the bed to first land in shining, blonde hair before moving around to lovingly cradle a gorgeous, alabaster face.
Questioningly regarding the other woman as Emily continued to reverently hold her cheeks between her palms, Alison then passionately kissed her, their mouths lovingly engaging in a romantic tryst of needy lips and probing tongues, this intimate joining speaking volumes to the commitment they felt for one another.
"I love you so much, Emily," Alison passionately insisted as she once again gazed down at her wife. "I will always be here for you. Even when I'm not physically here, I. . ."
Alison quickly trailed off with a slight shake of her head. And, ultimately choosing not to continue in words, but with her actions, instead, Alison was determined to properly tell Emily goodbye - to somehow prove to her that they would be okay. Alison desperately needed Emily to know that she was doing this for all the right reasons and that she truly believed that everything was going to be alright.
Glancing down her own body to amorously watch her wife's rapturous work, Emily's aroused, brown eyes again locked with provocative blue over the swell of her own breasts, her needy center forcefully contracting as she imagined that beautiful mouth applying its efforts exactly where they both knew she needed them to be.
But, that clearly wasn't going to happen just yet.
Alison was completely content with taking her time - with worshiping every last inch of caramel skin sprawled beneath her. It was very obvious to Emily that Alison was determined to prove to her she was all in - that she could trust her - no matter how uncertain their future currently seemed to be.
And, as Emily's hands luxuriated in memorizing the soft fullness of two perfectly formed breasts, Alison's eyes soon fell shut, a needy fire burning deep inside.
"Oh, God," Alison groaned, her back arching as she pressed her own hips more firmly against Emily's core.
And, as Alison came to rest upon her, one heated center lowering itself to meet another, Emily harshly bit her bottom lip; her eyes once again meeting stormy, bright blue ones as a slight smirk tugged at Alison's kiss bruised lips.
Finding herself completely helpless beneath her wife - it just seemed so natural, so personal, and almost primal to have this woman so intimately connected with her - Emily's body unabashedly began to shake, her heart raucously hammering against her chest.
"Please, Ali," Emily hoarsely murmured, her eyes inevitably falling shut, her neck arching, and her head digging into the pillow when Alison began to gently rock against her. "I need you. So much."
This was the most intimate thing two lovers could do and, with her eyes lost in the vision of Alison moving above her, Emily felt their connection again being reaffirmed - making love to Alison had always felt so right.
That realization, alone, was enough to make Emily want to cry, but it also proved to be a startling realization; what she and Alison shared was the most profound and enlightening thing she had ever experienced. They were made for each other - meant to be - and, despite the distance, they could make this work.
They had to.
With hands stronger than expected, Alison quickly broke Emily from her thoughts as she suddenly spread silky, caramel thighs as far apart as they would go and, once she had full access to her wife's heated sex, Alison teased glistening folds with insistent fingers before again moving to straddle her center. Lowering herself back down onto the apex of Emily's thighs, both women's mouths fell open at the rapturous sensation of one pulsating bundle of nerves nudging against its mate.
Alison's hands then slipped between Emily's backside and the fabric of the sheets, her palms and fingertips digging into the skin of a rounded bottom to forcefully keep their needy bodies firmly locked in place.
"You feel so good, Em," Alison passionately husked, her head dropping forward and causing long, blonde hair to surround her face as she watched the seductive vision of her own center salaciously undulating against that of the beautiful woman lying beneath her.
"I love you, Ali," Emily urgently groaned, her left heel firmly digging into the mattress to force herself upward and into the blazing heat of Alison's center. "Please don't stop."
Alison couldn't have forced herself to stop even if she tried and, hopelessly continuing to grind herself into Emily, her hands soon became a vice grip at her lover's hips as she drove their bodies together harder and harder, over and over again.
With rapid and forceful thrusts, Alison pushed herself more firmly against Emily's tender flesh, her excitement growing and her heady essence flowing, further lubricating her wife's already dripping core. And, consummately reveling in the closeness of their bodies, the heat of their hips, and the slick wetness of their excitement joining together, Alison continued her steady assault, making love to Emily with a perpetually abiding rhythm, trembling caramel thighs splaying further apart to shamelessly take anything and everything Alison had to give.
The sensation was exhilarating, and Emily's mind began to race as they continued to rock against each other. She had always been amazed by how in tune their bodies worked together - even on the first night they had made love when they were still in high school. And, with sudden and intense feelings of love and dedication for the other woman completely consuming her, Emily knew - beyond a shadow of a doubt - she could not live without her wife; she had to have her, even if it was from afar.
This primal lovemaking made her realize that, no matter the circumstance, she would forever and always want to belong to Alison. She wanted to be the other woman's everything - her mind, her body, and her soul - to give her all her love and receive hers in return.
Soon, though, all coherent thought and speech quickly became impossible for either woman, cursed demands and hushed expletives straining from agape mouths to bounce off the walls of their master bedroom.
Alison's thrusts eventually became more erratic; all the muscles in her perspiration slick body tensing as she desperately tried to drive herself more forcefully against Emily's willing body, her orgasm exploding over her just seconds after Emily reached the peak of her own needy pleasure.
With both women soon convulsing with overwhelming spasms as they found what they had so desperately been seeking, ripples of sheer ecstasy flooded through their bodies, starting at their centers and spreading outward to the very tips of their fingers and toes.
An inarticulate groan fell from Alison's lips and, with that, she could no longer hold herself above her frenzied lover, her own pulsating form falling forward to rest atop Emily's smaller one. And, when the last rapturous contraction subsided, Alison attempted to roll to her side, but insistent palms gripped at an ivory back, forcing her to stay close.
"Please don't leave me," Emily huskily whispered, the dual meaning of that request not going unnoticed by either woman.
Obediently doing as her wife asked, Alison's lips tenderly moved against Emily's jaw before caressing the shell of a caramel ear and sucking its lobe into her mouth. "I'm here, Emily. I'm right here," she gently soothed, her right hand moving into mahogany hair to carefully push it away from a sweaty face.
Emily let out a soft sigh, emotional, chocolate eyes flicking to the side to watch as Alison positioned her elbow against the mattress, the side of her own face now cradled in the palm of her hand, her legs and right arm remaining entangled with Emily's completely sated form.
Emily had been so strong the night before - valiantly insisting that Alison needed to go - to take this amazing opportunity and run with it - but as the reality of her departure again took hold, the brunette found herself overwhelmingly shaken, overwrought to her very core.
"I know I'll be away, but I'm not leaving you," Alison vehemently insisted, blue eyes blinking to adjust to the darkness of the room. "I'm here for you, Em. I'm right here."
Responding with nothing more than a tight nod, a silent tear slipped down Emily's cheek, leaving a trail of moisture in its wake. "I-I. . ." She wanted to say so much, but she trailed off, quickly dropping Alison's heartfelt gaze as she swallowed hard against the lump of emotion that had gathered in her throat.
Emily didn't have to say anything.
Alison already knew.
She could tell that her wife's psyche - her mind, her body, and her soul - was now full of doubt - but, honestly speaking her truth, she said the only thing she possibly could.
"You're a part of me, Em. I want to be with you, no matter what, and I promise I'm going to do everything in my power to keep our marriage alive. We're going to make this work. Because, I need you, Emily. I can't breathe without you, Lily, and Grace, and I. . .I know there's no way in hell I'm ever going to be able to live without you."
Two Hours Ago...
If it were up to her, Alison would have preferred Emily drive her to the airport. She desperately wanted to spend as much time as humanly possible with her family - just one more hour, one more minute, one more second- it would never be enough.
But, Beacon Heights University had something completely different in mind - they were sending a hired car to pick her up in order to get her to the airport in time for her late-night flight. It was less than desirable - she would be teaching her first class at BHU tomorrow morning at 10am - but right now, Alison couldn't allow herself to dwell on all of that.
Since receiving the news that she would indeed be granted a full scholarship to Beacon Heights University in order to complete her master's degree, Alison desperately had tried to be present. She had forced herself to live in the moment and to cherish every last ounce of the time she had left with Emily and the twins and, right now, that is exactly what she intended to do.
Knowing that this was going to be one of the most difficult things her wife had ever done, Emily already had retreated downstairs, allowing Alison the time she needed to properly say goodbye to Lily and Grace. Alison loved her children more than she ever thought possible - she desperately yearned to be the best mother she could possibly be - and Emily's own heart ached in sympathy for the struggle and agony she knew had now befallen her visibly struggling wife.
Upstairs, in the bedroom, dimly lit by the soft glow of a small lamp, Alison comfortably sat in a plush rocking chair, her lap contentedly filled by two sleepy toddlers, both girls perfectly nestled into the crook of her lovingly arms, one on her left and the other on her right. The three had perfected story time a long time ago and, situated just right, Alison was able to lay a tender, motherly kiss atop their heads with each and every turn of the page.
"Goodnight nobody. Goodnight mush. And goodnight to the old lady whispering "hush". . ."
Feeling the familiar, but unwelcome burn of tears as they inevitably began to well within dejected, blue eyes, Alison slowly drew in a steadying breath before somehow managing to whisper the very last lines of her daughters' favorite book.
"Goodnight stars. Goodnight air. Goodnight noises everywhere. . ."
And, as Alison slowly closed the cover of the thoroughly loved book, she felt the first tear begin to fall.
Present Day...
Alison simply could not believe that she was doing this - not after she had promised Emily that she would always have a family - that she would always be there for her, no matter what.
She loved Emily with every fiber of her being. With every breath that she breathed.
And, those twins. My goodness, those beautiful babies she adored more than she ever thought possible.
But, now sitting on the Hotchkiss private jet, alone, with not a familiar face around, Alison couldn't help but recall all of the promises she had made - promises that, while not completely broken, seemed dangerously close to not being upheld.
Ali, you okay?
With the vibration of her phone instantly breaking her from her tormented thoughts, tired, blue eyes quickly flicked downward toward the device to read her wife's words before taking her time to reply with a completely honest response.
It's going to be hard not seeing the girls every day.
You're going to BH for the right reasons.
Even after the heartfelt conversation they had engaged in the night before and the life affirming love making they had passionately shared - later followed by their even more fervent goodbye - for reasons Alison didn't quite understand, Emily's response completed grated at her nerves. She simply could not seem to rid her mind of the fact that Emily didn't completely trust her - that the other woman didn't truly believe she wasn't just frivolously leaving it all behind.
Why do you have to be so convinced about it?
Can we please not argue?
Suddenly feeling overwhelmingly petulant, Alison quickly typed the very first thought that popped into her head, her right, index finger dangerously hovering over the send key as she thoughtfully considered her response.
I don't know. Can we?
But, as tears began to well in conflicted, cerulean eyes for what seemed like the millionth time that night, Alison quickly retracted her claws, softly clearing her throat against the lump of emotion that had begun to gather there. And, quickly deleting her original message, she sadly stared down at the screen, uncertain of exactly what to say.
Ali?
Instantly feeling the concern emanating from Emily's simple text, Alison wisely decided to completely change the subject.
You'll never believe where I'm flying out of…
Philly?
No. Guess again.
Harrisburg?
Nope.
Pittsburgh?
Think rural.
No way!
Yeah.
Seriously?
Yup. Dougherty's Landing.
Surreal.
They're telling me I have to turn off my phone. Call you when I land.
Alison momentarily hesitated, but then, deft, alabaster fingers quickly moved of their own volition, automatically typing what she definitively knew - deep down - in both her head and her heart.
Love you.
A thought bubble instantly popped up on Emily's side of the text conversation, leading Alison to believe that her wife was preparing to respond, but as quickly as that damn little bubble had appeared, it was gone. And, fearing the very worst - certain that this really was too much and that Emily was never going to be able trust her enough to leave the past in the past - Alison finally gave in to the incongruous cluster of emotions she had been experiencing since she'd sadly left their home, a singular tear, slowly meandering its way down her face.
And, with a heaving sigh, Alison begrudgingly readied herself to power off, her phone suddenly surprising her when it buzzed in her hand.
I love you, too.