"I can't stand this anymore!"
Hades writhed in his throne, bellowing with rage, his dark eyes burning in his face twisted with fury.
"I can't stand this anymore!" he repeated loudly, craning his neck to look for a servant. Why would no-one help him? There he was, Hades, powerful God of the Underworld, glued to his throne, and no-one even deigned come to his aid? The emptiness of the throne room despaired him.
Suddenly, he heard a patter of feet and roared to the servant he knew was coming:
"Get me out of here! Now!"
A tired-looking man appeared, dressed in a complete blood red outfit. He was slightly panting as he rapidly marched to Hades' throne, brushing his white hair to the side. His wrinkled face displayed evident fatigue, as did the dark rings under his eyes.
"My Lord", he started, "since you have dismissed your guests, we have escorted them out of the realm and presented them with the gifts you had prepa-"
"I don't care what you did, just look at me!" Hades boomed, anger spreading on his thick face once more. The servant looked up and sighed:
"All right, what has she done now..."
Persephone grinned mischievously. She could not help it, the nervous excitement of another prank on the Oh-so-terrifying God of the Underworld always made her smile. Even so, this was not an ordinary joke, not just switching the salt and sugar or breeding mice in his bed. No, this was the one which wold finally make him regret having kidnapped her from her mother, Demeter, Godess of the seasons.
The young girl peeked out from behind the wall in the corridor, making sure no-one would see her slipping in. The kitchens were deserted. Persephone shook her head, surprised at her luck, and stepped in. All that she needed, she would find here.
The God of the Underworld woke up that morning with a smile playing on his lips. The bright sun warmed him gently, a number of important officials were arriving shortly to settle a very profitable affair and, most of all, it was his birthday.
Hades lept out of bed as eagerly as a child on Christmas day and rushed to his massive mahogonay wardrobe to don the spectacular outfit he reserved for special occasions to impress everyone else. It was woven intricately with only the thinnest threads of pure gold and white silk of the highest quality. The effect was blinding. It was only when wearing this outfit that Hades ever truly felt like a God.
After allowing himself one last vain glance in the mirror, Hades pushed open his door, ready to greet his visitors. So absorbed was he in his thoughts that he did not notice the bucket poised precariously on the top edge of the door. However, he noticed when a heavy wave of bright blue paint slammed down onto his head and drenched him entirely, covering him with the sticky, colorful liquid.
A stunned gasp escaped from his lips. The man froze, his shoulders tensed, his watering eyes frantically trying to blink away the paint. He drew a deep breath and opened his mouth:
"PERSEPHONE!" he erupted, shaking with spite. His shout ripped from his throat, tearing his vocal cords. It was so loud that it left his own ears ringing. Bouncing off the marble walls, the scream reached the ears of the young Persephone who was smirking behind a nearby pillar. Step One had worked wonderfully. Her features arranged to a natural expression, the girl walked out from behind the pillar.
"Yes?" she asked sweetly to the blue man.
"My clothes are ruined, not to mention my birthday. I can't prove you did it but, mark my words, you'll regret this! You'll regret it even more if you do not prepare me a bathtub in the next five minutes!"
Persephone opened her eyes in mock surprise and and answered innocently:
"Why, of course, although I certainly don't see why you would take a bath now... Your visitors are waiting, after all."
Haders shuddered at the reminder but did not reply. He heard the girl walk away then come back, her voice sickening to his ears:
"The bath will be ready in the throne room, follow me."
Breathing heavily to calm his nerves, the poor God strode off after Persephone to the throne room where, indeed, a bathtub had been filled with steaming water.
"Leave me now", he growled to the girl, then sunk, relieved, into the water.
Persephone trotted out of the room and closed the door behind her. Finally she gave in and burst into the ecstatic laugh she had been endeavouring to repress all that time. The plan was unolding perfectly; it was all she had dreamed for.
Soothing herself, Persephone left the throne room to start the next step of her plan after fishing into her pocket for a few pomegranate seeds which she had stolen in the kitchen. The entertainment was making her hungry! The girl followed a short corridor and entered a richly decorated room on her left where waited six grim officials in dark suits.
"My dear visitors, please come, I will lead you to my Lord. He awaits you in the throne room."
Grumbling because they had been savoring the treats that had been layed out for them, the men stiffly stood up and followed the rejoicing Persephone towards a set of magnificiently carved oak doors.
Biting her lip with barely contained anticipation, Persephone opened the doors wide and drew away to let the men in, then hopped out of sight to enjoy the scene.
Hades rubbed his arms feverishly, aware that he could not keep his guests waiting much longer. He wished he had killed the girl earlier, thinking about how she had made him suffer during the past week. He was starting to regret having stolen her. Apparently, girls did not make very obedient pets...
All of a sudden, he saw the doors open and started. Irritated, he began a rude menace to the servant who dared enter while he was bathing. Instead, a pathetic wimper grew in the back of his throat when he beheld the officials gliding in solemnly. His heart fluttered with shame when their eyes rested scornfully on him.
"Well", began one, sneering, "is this how the great Hades greets his visitors? Maybe we shall leave, considering you do not find us worth your time."
"No! Please, let me explain!" cried the desperate man. Forgetting his nudity, Hades jumped out of the bathtub in front of his throne to keep the men from leaving. He really would kill Persephone when this was over.
He only had time to notice that the floor was unnaturally slippery and that a faint smell of oil hovered in the air before skidding on the polished stone and landing discracefully on the throne. The shock cut his breath. Unfazed, the officials turned on their heels and headed out, muttering darkly.
Hades was on the verge of tears, the tough, burly man he thought he was, shattering. His heart heavy, he tried to ease his bruised body out of the throne – but could not: he was pinned to his seat. His momentary weakness was replaced by exploding wrath. For the second time in less than an hour, Hades shouted:
"Persephone! Come Here!"
The girl had been waiting for this moment. She sauntered into the room, not trying to hide what she had done.
"Happy Birthday, Hades!" she squealed with delight, rolling on the floor in her mirth.
"You shall be sent home immediately! I cannot live one more minute with you here", snarled Hades.
Persephone sat up suddenly. It was finally happening! Overwhelmed, the young girl pulled out a few more pomegranate seeds from her dress and slipped them in her mouth to regain countenance.
"No!" screamed Hades, but it was too late, she had swallowed them.
"Those were grown in the Underworld orchards! If you eat food from this realm, you can never leave again. Persephone: one step out of here and you shall die."
Her heart stopped. Persephone pushed herself up on her trembling legs and looked right into Hades' dumstruck eyes:
"It's your fault that I'm here, Hades, and you will bear the punishment. I shall not leave, I will not die, but if I can never return to my own kingdom, consider what I did to you today nothing compared to what a future with me reserves."
Her head held high, Persephone staggered out without another another word. Hades was left alone on his throne.
"I can't stand this anymore!"