-1Yuffie And The Positive Virus

A/N: my 5th piece of fan fiction here, and was inspired by me watching series 5 of Red Dwarf

Disclaimer: I do not own, pretend to own, think that I own anything from any other source in this typing, don't sue me.

Warning: Later chapters may contain scenes that would get me moderated on any games board for posting it.

Chapter 1

Yuffie was bored, there was no other way of describing it. Materia will never have the same place in her heart since the fall of Shinra during the fall of meteor. Sure it was useful to keep around just in case but she had gotten so good at fighting with the conformer and her Ninjitsu abilities were the best in the world there was just no challenge.

She was a master thief, she could crack bank vaults, bust open safes and steal materia from inside your closed hand.

Lately she had tried to woo one Vincent Valentine, they had fought together on three separate occasions, the last time she felt they were getting closer together, she was growing up and he was accepting that she wasn't a little kid, until of course she showed up.

"Damn young girl with the mind of an old girl who is Vincent's dead girl" Yuffie really hated Shelke, having her pushed the two apart. She sighed, the one time she starts growing up he falls for someone younger "Stupid broody broodalot" she huffed.

Yuffie had really changed physically in the past years, she had a more curved body than ever before and she had become even more athletic and could now outrun any pursuer, be they security guards or an angry Tifa for planting a whoopee cushion on her chair at Clouds birthday party. The less said about that encounter the better.

She was back in her element, hiding in the forests planning on stealing anything of value from passers by, she often returned most of the things she stole but not today, there was a secret shipment being overseen by Reno and Rude and she just couldn't help herself but to help herself.

"So what's in the case, yo?"

"…"

"Come on let me see"

"no"

"Just one peek?"

"No"

"aw come on!"

"No"

"why not?"

"Because it had 'biological risk' written on it"

"Please do you think Rufus is that dumb to give us something that could kill millions?"

"…"

"Yeah that did kinda bite me in the ass"

Yuffie giggled, she missed facing off against the Turks, mainly because they were fun to beat up, especially Reno. But this time it sounded like they had some real heavy duty stuff in that case. She jumped down from her branch, descended while kicking Rude in the back of the head, made a grab for the case and disappeared. All while Reno was looking the other way.

"But seriously yo, yo? Rude?"

She was very good at this.

She rushed back to The Final Heaven bar in Edge, smiling at Tifa as she strutted past and up to her room. She locked the door placed the suitcase on her bed and opened it.

There were 5 vials lying in the case with some papers. This had at first been a big disappointment to Yuffie, why keep something so boring so secret? Until she read the labels

Luck, Joy, Charisma, Inspiration and Sexual Magnetism

"Aftershaves?" Yuffie pondered before turning her attention to the papers. Apparently, these were positive viruses which boosted people and increase certain characteristics. "Sexual magnetism?" she said to herself "Gotta try some of that!"