What the Hell is Going On
"I don't need her to All Lima Heights on you I can take care of myself." Brittany shouts in an un-Brittany way.
Mercedes, Tina, Quinn and Rachel are all sitting in the bleachers when they hear this. None of them speak until they hear Brittany walk away.
"Who was Brittany talking to and what was that about?" Rachel asks looking around rather scared.
"I've never heard Brittany talk like that before." Quinn looks around as if she is looking for someone to come out and say surprise.
"It sounded like Satan." Mercedes shutters.
"That can't be it she's been around Santana all her life and never acted like her before why now?" Tina asks.
"It's cause their dating now." Quinn says staring at her three friends. "Brittany is probably trying to show Santana she doesn't need her to protect her all the time."
"Let's hope we can get down to the bottom of this and get Brittany back to normal." Rachel agrees as all the girls head off to their next class.
Little did they know that Brittany is under the bleachers talking to the skanks.
"Why would we help you?" Ronnie sneers, but it is hard for her to be anger towards Brittany no one can.
"Yeah we're not into the whole charity thing." Shelia adds sharpening her shank.
"I thought you didn't mind me in fact that you guys actually liked me and Santana is just as twisted as you." Brittany frowns trying to work it out.
"True you and Santana are like the only two other people at this school that we can stand mostly cause you keep to yourself about your lesbian tendencies and only perve on each other. Still that doesn't mean that we would actually do something for you." Mack says.
"Cause you dislike Finn, Artie and Rory as much as I do and I'm willing to convince Coach Sue to not kick you off school grounds for smoking and such along with wiping your attendance record clean." Brittany offers smiling sweetly. "Oh and I'll give you each two hundred dollars."
"You do realize what you're asking us to do don't you?" the Mack asks staring at the tall dizzy blonde.
"Of course," Brittany giggles. "I'll take that as a yes, so tomorrow it goes down."
Brittany skips away going to meet Santana in the auditorium. The three skanks watch her leave mouths hung open from the conversation they just had with the nicest and most innocent girl in the school.
"New rule never piss that one off." Shelia shutters.
"And I thought Santana was the mean one." Ronnie shakes her head.
"Is it sad to say that she actually scares me." the Mack says tarring her eyes away from where Brittany had disappeared.
"No cause while Santana maybe a bitch, I think we've discovered that Brittany is the one who would actually would kill someone for Santana." Shelia wisely says.
"Whatever we get shit for doing this that's all I care about." the Mack shrugs this could actually be fun.
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Everyone is in the choir room waiting for Mr. Shue except for Brittany and Santana who are in the janitors closet getting a round in before glee.
"Why in god's name are you three cowering in a corner?" Kurt finally asks after everyone has been staring at Artie, Finn and Rory for a good three minutes.
"Yeah Finn we always sit together." Rachel says.
"Oh come off it we all know that look as we've all had it at least once. What you'd do to piss Santana off this time?" Quinn asks glaring at each of them.
"Um..well we didn't piss Santana off per say." Finn meekly says.
"I dat just scareddt oft thee short one." Rory manages to get out.
Artie doesn't say anything he is just hoping Quinn would drop it. Of course he has no luck with that.
"What exactly did you do that has you cowering for your lives if you didn't piss off Santana?" Quinn asks think she might already have that answer.
"Well the thing is-" Finn starts before Artie cuts him off.
"We upset Brittany by telling her Santana was no good for her and she should get together with either myself or Rory okay. So now we're scared cause Britt tells Santana everything." Artie is breathing from working himself up.
"Are you insane?" Mike shouts.
"You've set off the beast." Puck shutters.
"Satan is going to end you." Mercedes says sitting back giving a knowing look to Kurt.
They are both looking forward to the verbal abuse the three boys will be receiving.
Brittany and Santana both walk in hand and hand. Everyone looks expectantly at Santana, but she is actually smiling and that scares everyone even more. All three boys back away. Nothing happens and everyone is shocked that she isn't upset. After class they both get up and leave before anyone else.
"You three lucked out." Quinn whispers as she walks out.
"Ubber lucky," Puck says following Quinn out.
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"Brittany did you notice how everyone was staring at me during glee." Santana asks climbing into bed with her.
"Well who knows they are slightly crazy sometimes maybe they were just wondering why the two beautiful girls weren't going at it in the back like normal." Brittany seductively whispers her hand working its way up to Santana's breasts.
"Hum," Santana moans as Brittany squeezes her breasts.
Brittany yanks off her and Santana's shirt. Thanking god that they had just finished getting ready for bed so she doesn't have to remove any bra's or underwear. Kissing Santana's neck she begins to pull down her pants.
After four rounds both girls are exhausted. Santana curls up with Brittany being the big spoon wrapping her arms around her girl. She kisses the Latina's shoulder before whispering "I love you Tana."
"Love you too, B." Santana whispers, drifting off to sleep.
Mr. Pierce who had fallen asleep on the couch for the umpteenth time. He gets up to go check on Brittany and smiles when he sees her arms wrapped around Santana. His heart fills with pride cause he adores his daughter and her girlfriend. There is no one in the world he trusts more than Santana with his little girl even if that means he occasional hears them having sex. Which he will never be able to un-hear or forget.
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"It's done," The Mack whispers in Brittany's ear as she, Shelia and Ronnie walk pass her on their way to under the bleachers.
Brittany smiles at them nodding. She then skips over to Santana lopping their arms together walking over to the choir room. When they walk in it is a mad house of people rushing around to help out Finn, Artie and Rory. No one notices Brittany smiling from ear to ear.
"Keep her away from me." Finn yelps trying to back up when he sees Santana.
Santana looks very confused as both Artie and Rory back up trying to get away from the mad woman.
"What the hell happened to you three?" Santana asks putting a protective arm around Brittany thinking maybe the jocks are at it again.
"Like you don't know." Artie manages to get out as everyone nods.
"What the fuck are you talking about?" Santana looks very perplexed at what they are referring to.
"Dat you'd attacked us?" Rory says.
"Huh?"
"Tana has been with me all day so there's no way she could have done this." Brittany innocently says.
"She obviously did do it herself." Finn says as if everyone should know this.
"Yeah we were jumped by the skanks." Artie says shuttering.
"Oh my god Santana I can't believe you would do something like that." Rachel gasps as she looks at Finn's wounds.
"Wait the skanks did this to you, why? And just to let you know if I did have a beef with any of you I would take care of it myself." Santana growls getting really annoyed.
"So you didn't send the skanks on us after we tried to convince Brittany that you were no go for her and she should date either Rory or Artie." Finn asks.
"I'm going to kills you." Santana shouts leaping at Finn scratching at Finn's face while managing to get a good kick at Rory's crotch.
"Britt, help." Quinn and Rachel says trying to hold Santana back along with Puck and Mike.
"No," Brittany sternly says, everyone whips their heads around to look at her.
Santana can tell that something is off with Brittany and all the fight in her leaves. She runs over to her.
"What's wrong B?" Santana asks kissing her.
"They made me so mad when they tried to tell me that you weren't good for me, but they were." Brittany cries into Santana's chest holding onto her tight.
"Shh, babe it's okay, it's okay." Santana kisses her forehead. "Look what you idiots did you made Brittany cry. Now as soon as I'm done comforting my girlfriend I will ends all three of you." she growls.
"No, San. I already got them back." Brittany says to everyone's confusion.
"What are you talking about hun?" Santana asks whipping away some tears from Brittany's face.
"I didn't tell you about it yesterday cause I convinced the Skanks to attack them and I didn't want you to get in anymore trouble Tana." Brittany tells everyone.
Everyone's mouths fall open. They can't believe that innocent, nice Brittany has sent the skanks on the three boys. Santana yanks Brittany out of the room and directs them to her car.
"B, I know you feel bad, but I'm proud of you for standing up for us. I know that I normally protect you, but I'm glad that you can protect yourself." Santana passionately kisses her. "Now yours or mine I'm so turned on right now."
"My parents aren't home." Brittany seductively suggests.
"Best idea ever B." Santana kisses her before opening the car door for her.