I run my fingers over the delicate skin on my wrist where the tattoo is. It's a circle outlined in black. Inside, there's a surf board for my friend Finnick, a smile for my other friend, Annie who is always smiling, a middle finger for Johanna, who couldn't be described better, a loaf if bread for my boyfriend who I miss so much it suffocates my heart of every drip of happiness. There's the black music note for me.
It couldn't describe us better.
College graduation.
It's scary, but it's one event I will never forget.
We haven't had time to Skype or FaceTime since we started Junior year of college, which began two years ago in exactly three months from this day. It's June seventh and I'm in my gown. My entire family, even my douche father are here. We have texted and called.
I know I look different. Somehow, I managed to grow a few inches, my hair is down to almost my ass, I'm tan and my New York accent that I grew up with is back.
When I go see them tomorrow I know they're gonna give me shit for it.
I am the last to graduate and we're meeting in Flridia at Finnick and Annie's beach house.
"Katniss J, Everdeen." My name is called for graduation. My heart hammers as I walk up to the stage.
I shake his hand and take the diploma. My mind is too foggy to remember his name. My family is hooting and clapping and screaming.
My father, who beat me and nearly raped me as a child even seems happy. My little sister, Rosie, sheMs now six and in Kindergarten, and my other sister, Prim, she's in her senior year, seventeen years old. Me? I'm twenty one. I've never drank, another thing I'll get shit for.
I can't wipe the stupid grin off my face as I sit down in my seat next to my friend.
I was worried about having no friends for nothing. People from my high school go here, and from middle school. I guess being one if the most popular people really paid off.
I clap through the rest if the ceremony, and we toss our caps and then my family engulfs me in suffocating hugs so tight I fight for air.
I want to bring Megan to Florida.
We were friends from Freshmen year f high chill to Junior year, sort of. She was quiet like me. I guess senior year changed the both of us and we've fought for our place.
She's one if my closest friends now.
My family insisted on throwing some gigantic party at Uncle Haymitch's house here.
I stay with Megan, talking to all of the people I know, forcing myself to be nice to my father. He looks happy and heathy and he smiles and he doesn't act like a dick
My phone beeps with a message.
Johanna: bitch!
Johanna: hey. So I'm gonna bring my friend. Her names Kelsey
It's a group message.
Peeta: is it bad that in laughing so hard I nearly pissed myself?
I'm laughing too, actually
There's a whole thing with the name Kelsey in our group.
Johanna: yeah, I got a kick out of her fucking name too, and she wouldn't talk to me when we first met because I gave her shit for it
Finn: KITTY DID YOU GO TO GRADUATION YET?
Me: uh yeah In at the party with Megan
Literally three seconds later my phone is ringing with a phone call for a group call.
I accept it.
"Yes?"
They all start screaming congratulations, and even over the loud music, I can still hear them.
"Wow, uh...thanks."
I mange to disguise my New York accent while I'm in the phone but in person I'm going to slip up.
"Who's on the phone?" Megan asks.
"Katniss get off the phone!" Josh complains. He's another friend, but it's simply friendly. I flick then off and sneak outside.
"Was that Josh?" Peeta asks.
"Yeah."
"You guys are um...staying friendly, right?"
I laugh softly. "I told you I wasn't cheating and I meant it. Look, I've really got to go. I'll see you guys, okay?"
"Okay." They say.
I hang up and go back in the house.
I am text them.
Me: can I bring Megan?
Finn: bring whoever you want
Johanna: only if she's over 21
Annie: yeah Kat we're having a party
Me: we are?
Peeta: yes
Me: why am I just not hearing about this?
Me: this could get out of hand. People can get hurt. What if we get too drunk?
Johanna: this is why we didn't tell you, you can fool
Me: suck a dick
Johanna: I just did
Me: wait, legit?
Johanna: fuck yeah. You two are the only virgins in our little group. U need Ur pussy stretched brainless
Me: Ur fucking sick
Johanna: it's tru
Annie: I'm getting a kick out of this
Finn: it's true, I'm watching her laugh
Me: y r u gys so dumb
Peeta: we get it from you
Peeta: jk
Peeta: sorry. I was kidding
Peeta: Katniss
Peeta: I'm sorry
Me: calm down
Peeta: okay. Sorry
Me: it's kk
"KATNISS!" Megan screams.
"Want to go to Florida?" I ask.
"SHIT YEAH!"
...9...
My plane is landing. Peeta is picking me up from the airport because we all decided we need alone time. That, and, he got off of his flight an hour before I did and he didn't bring his car and I did, so we're just riding together. I changed my mind about bringing Megan.
I feel it touch the ground and I pull out my phone and text Peeta.
Me: I just landed
I shove my phone in my bag because I need to get up.
I get my carry on and wait for the tram. After a half hour of waiting, I manage to catch one.
When it stops, people start filing off. I check my phone, my head down as I walk out with my bag on my shoulder and dig my phone out.
Peeta: perfect. I'm so excited to see you :D
I smile and look up.
And there he is.
He's watching me with a goofy grin on his face. His right hand is in his pocket and his left is scratching the back of his neck.
A huge grin spreads across my lips.
I feel tears start sliding down my cheeks as I drop everything in my hands and run for him. I see heads turn. I slam into him and nearly knock him backwards. He stumbles slightly, and then spins me around. My arms around locked around his neck so tightly that it's hard for us to breathe. His hands are on my waist. He sets me down. "Oh my god." He whispers. He places his hands on my cheeks, running his thumbs along my cheekbones. "God." He whispers again. "I can't believe your here. You have no idea. I love you." He kisses my lips. "I love you," he says again, planting another kiss. "God, I love you. I've missed you. Oh my god." He looks like he's about to cry.
"I love you too. I've missed you so much. Oh my god Peeta." I kiss him. It's short and sweet.
Still, we've never made out. Still, we've never had sex. I think in ready to jump through all the steps. I know I want to spend the rest of my life with him.
What happens after this vacation?
Oh god. I wrap my arms tightly around his waist and pull him against me. He wraps his arms around me and pulls me just as tightly, burying his head in my hair as I hide my head in his chest.
He smells like heaven. He smells familiar. He smells like home.
Slowly, he releases me and holds me at arms length, his hands on my shoulders.
His eyes drag up and down my body for a little bit. "You are still so beautiful." He kisses my jawline and then pulls me over to collect my things. I reach grab them before he can.
He takes my hand and we go to down baggage. When I see my bag and reach for it, he grabs it. "Oh you don't have to do that." I say.
He laughs. Although he already has his one suitcase and carry on, he still insists on taking my four. I have a lot of stuff to give to people.
And I might have brought way too many clothes.
I have the valet guy get my car.
We wait patently outside, and when the guy pulls up in my new car. Peeta looks like he's going to pass out.
For my graduation present, Mom, Haymitch and Prim put their money together to get me a convertible 2014 Jaguar F-Type V8S.
"I love your car." The guy says as he hands me the keys.
I look at Peeta and his mouth is hanging open. "Oh my god." He says. "Holy shit."
I smile and pop the truck. He carefully places all the suitcases in. I toss him the keys after he shuts the trunk. "You're kidding?" He licks his lips and I get that feeling of arousal that I feel every damn time I think of him.
"If you want to drive, you can drive." I peck his lips. "If you don't, then I'll drive."
"I want to drive if that's okay." He says. I smile. "You're adorable."
He opens the passenger door and I get in. He shuts the door and gets I the driver side. He adjusts everything to his needs and sits back with a sigh for a moment, and then starts the car, revs the engine and speeds off.
Finn and Ann live on Clearwater Beach and we are in Orlando, so we'll be getting there in an hour and a half to two hours.
I change the station on the radio multiple times before decided to settle with 101.5.
He links our fingers and with a sigh, I look out the window after putting the top down.
The song Animals by Nickleback comes on as we start driving through the wooded areas of the state.
I, I'm driving black on black
Just got my license back
I got this feeling in my veins this train is coming off the track
I'll ask polite if the devil needs a ride
Because the angel on my right ain't hanging out with me tonight
I'm driving past your house while you were sneaking out
I got the car door opened up so you can jump in on the run
Your mom don't know that you were missing
She'd be pissed if she could see the parts of you that I've been kissing
Screamin'
No, we're never gonna quit
Ain't nothing wrong with it
Just acting like we're animals
No, no matter where we go
'Cause everybody knows
We're just a couple of animals
So come on baby, get in
Get in, just get in
Check out the trouble we're in
You're beside me on the seat
Got your hand between my knees
And you control how fast we go by just how hard you wanna squeeze
It's hard to steer when you're breathing in my ear
But I got both hands on the wheel while you got both hands on my gears
By now, no doubt that we were heading south
I guess nobody ever taught her not to speak with a full mouth
'Cause this was it, like flicking on a switch
It felt so good I almost drove into the ditch
I'm screamin'
So come on baby, get in
Get in, just get in
Check out the trouble we're in
We were parked out by the tracks
We're sitting in the back
And we just started getting busy
When she whispered "what was that?"
The wind, I think 'cause no one else knows where we are
And that was when she started screamin'
"That's my dad outside the car!"
Oh please, the keys, they're not in the ignition
Must have wound up on the floor while
we were switching our positions
I guess they knew that she was missing
As I tried to tell her dad it was her mouth that I was kissing
Screamin'
So come on baby, get in
We're just a couple of animals
Get in, just get in
Ain't nothing wrong with it
Check out the trouble we're in
Get in, just get in
I wonder if it bothers him that we've never made out or had sex, and that in a few months we will be dating for five years.
And we have never made out or had sex.
I shut my eyes for a moment, bite the inside of my cheek as hard as I can without breaking skin, and then I look out the window.
"What's on your mind?" He asks.
I look down at my hands for a moment and sigh. "Does it ever bother you?" I ask.
"Does what ever bother me?"
"The fact that in four months we will be together for five years and we've never made out or...well, you know."
He sighs slowly. "It bugs the crap out of me every day. I don't want to push the boundaries-"
"That's it, Peeta. There isn't any boundaries anymore. I trust you with...with the world. I trust you so damn much that it's dangerous. I'm scared. God, I'm so scared." I shake my head and look back out the window. He pulls over, into the forest far enough that nobody will see us and shuts the car off.
"What are you scared of?"
"That we'll break up."
He's quiet for a minute. "I thought I was the only one afraid of that."
"I'm not just afraid, Peeta. I'm terrified." He's quiet again.
"You know what I want to do?" I ask, grabbing his right hand with my left as he picks the keys up.
"What?" He asks. The two of us can't stop grinning.
"We should test that thing...they they did in that song..."
"Um...doing that while I'm driving is just really not a good idea."
"Well." I unbuckle my seatbelt and scramble over to the backseat.
He stares at me for a few moments, and then he moves over to join me.
After hesitating for a moment, he kisses me. This is completely new territory for us. For a moment, our lips are just pressed together, unmoving. I shut my eyes and then we start moving. His fingers lock on my waist and tug me into his lap. I knot my fingers into his hair and probe at his lip and he gives me access. We fight for dominance, and I can feel the lump in the jeans against my thigh.
God dammit, why did we wait so long to do this?
I gyrate my hips against his hard on. He whimpers and his hands move up from my hips to my sides below my rib cage.
I have never wanted to have sex with someone. I want him so fucking badly that I feel a pressure and an ache in between my thighs. I rock against him harder and both of us moan softly. He flips me onto my back and hovers above me. "You really know how to move your hips." I grin, breathless. "But I have a question." He mumbles.
"Okay, shoot."
"It's been four years. We haven't seen each other in a while. You did stay truthful to me, right?"
"Peeta, of course I did! Did you?"
"Yes I did. A lot of girls have tried to kiss me. I yelled at all of them."
"Do I need to kick someone's ass?"
He leans down so his lips are inches from mine. "No." He whispers. "I really love making out with you."
"I really want..." I eye his hands and then grab his left arm and place it right over my breast. His eyes widen. "This."
"Fuck." He whispers, giving me a gentle squeeze.
"Do I have permission to take your clothes off?"
"Permission granted."
Sorry for the raunchy stuff. I know some of you tell me not to do it.