Author's Note: I read the manga Othello probably every single day, and just had to write something about Yaya and Nana. I almost cried when Nana faded. This is a nightly "talk" between the two, similar to their first talk. AU, because Nana does not intend to fade here. You can interpret some of the Yaya/Nana interaction as yuri (or would it be self-love?) if you want, but it isn't intended to be that at all.
Never Lost
The chills and exhilaration from the Rock Festival had Yaya still tingling, happier and more content than ever. Still, something was wrong. She couldn't feel Nana. She had been calling and calling, and Nana hadn't come. She had spoken to Moriyama and he had said Nana intended to 'fade' after the concert.
Yaya couldn't deal with the loss and had ran. Ran home. Her father, of course, had yelled at her, but eventually gave in to dumbfounded pride when he found out about her debut as a songstress, since it had been his wife's dream.
Yaya could do nothing but lay in bed and cry. She stared at the poster of Shohei, almost wanting to rip it down. She knew him. Met him. Talked to him. Produced with him. What need had she of a poster? It was HIS FAULT anyway. If he hadn't pushed Nana, Nana would never have left her.
Plip...plip...tears trailed down the young singer's face, landing on the magazine with "Nana's" face on the cover. "Mysterious song princess Nana." Yaya whispered.
"Don't leave me, Nana. Please, please don't leave me. You made all this come true. You have to be here for this. This is OUR dream, not just mine. Please Nana!" She screamed and dug her nails into the magazine with Nana, no HER, face on it.
She hugged the magazine to her chest, pressing her face against the crumpled image of "Nana" and fell in to a fitful sleep.
Yaya...Yaya...
The dream world, the little room she had retreated to when Nana took over, materialized. Yaya put her head on her knees and looked around the empty, deadened room. It was so empty without her sister, her other self, her Nana. But had she heard something? Her name being called? Or was she just hoping and hearing things out of sadness?
"Nana. Nana please! Please come here! We're here! This is OUR heart, not just mine. You have shared it with me since we were children. You can't just abandon it now. Come on, Nana." Tears trailed down her cheeks.
"I need you, Nana. No matter how 'strong' you say I am, I still need you. I still want you! I couldn't have done any of this without you and this is YOUR dream too! You need to be a part of it. Please!" Her begging and crying had increased in tempo.
"Yaya! Stop it right now, or justice will be done to you!" Yaya gasped with shock and pleasure as she recognized the brash voice and catch phrase.
"N-Nana? Where...?" Yaya stood up, turned, looked into her reflection. Or rather, Nana's face. Nana had come back. It had just taken a lot. It had taken...Yaya appearing weak again, hadn't it? She didn't want to be weak, didn't think she'd ever go back to being 'Yaya the cry-ya' again, but if being weak meant Nana remaining, she would be as weak as she could.
"Don't think like that, stupid! You aren't weak! Especially not now. You really don't NEED me, Yaya." Nana's words were harsh, but her expression was soft, smiling. She pulled Yaya into a hug.
"I'm glad you want me, Yaya, but don't you realize? If I stayed...you and Moriyama...you couldn't be together. And what about me? What would my future hold, when I don't even have my own body? I..I think I love Moriyama as much as you do, but he doesn't love Nana, he loves Yaya."
"I could be happy, being with Yaya and Moriyama, but I don't think Moriyama would be too happy with me still around when you guys start, uhm...dating...seriously." Nana's lip twitched, almost a laugh.
Yaya shook her head.
"Nana...Moriyama loves me. All of me. He could love you. I know he could. He knows you ARE me! He knows that! He just finds it hard to accept sometimes, you know that! We could make it work! I...I could maybe understand if you had fallen in love with someone else, like Shohei, and I was in love with Moriyama, but we both love him, so I don't see anything wrong here, Nana!"
Yaya reached for herself, her sister, and pulled Nana into a tight hug, stronger and tighter than Nana had imagined coming from Yaya. "You aren't leaving, Nana. Not now. Not ever. You're...you...if Moriyama can't accept us both, then he doesn't really love me, does he?"
Nana's eyes were bright and Yaya could have sworn she saw tears. But Nana never cried. Nana was too strong to ever cry. "Yaya...you mean it, don't you? You...you would choose me over Moriyama, if it came down to it...?"
Yaya wiped her tears and nodded fiercly.
Nana finally let a tear slide down her cheek. The first tear for her. For Yaya. She wanted to stay. She didn't want to fade away. She wanted to be a part of this dream that they had both brought about, but she never wanted Yaya hurt in any way.
"...I'll stay..." Nana's whisper was barely spoken, but Yaya heard it clearly and hugged Nana so fiercely that if she hadn't been a spirit, she wouldn't have been able to breathe.
Nana and Yaya held each other, warming their heart, finally reunited forever. Yaya's vision faded as she felt herself waking up. No! Don't! I don't want to wake up! Nana!
I'm not gone, Yaya. I'll never be gone, not until you tell me to go away. There was a slight jesting tone in Nana's voice.
"Never, Nana-chan, never." Yaya hugged herself, and uncrinkled the magazine, opening it to page about Nana/Yaya and reading, for herself and for Nana.
"They loved us, Nana! Look!" She pointed out the glowing reviews of her performance, even though she knew Nana saw them just as well as she had.
"So what are we going to do about Mimi?" It was Nana, using Yaya's voice and body, willingly shared.
"Huh? Mimi?" Yaya was confused. Her cosplay name was never more than a name, wasn't it?
Nana jerked Yaya's head. "Mimi...was Mimi. She was another you too, but you just remembered being her. Your personality was different as Mimi, but not so different that it would shock you like it did when you found out you were me. If anyone should know about other personalities, it's certainly me. Mimi...Mimi will fade away too, if we don't go back, but really, is Shohei THAT great?" Nana laughed with Yaya's voice.
"Nana, I didn't know that-that Mimi...that she's wasn't really me, you know? I don't want to go back for Shohei...I want to go back for my friends. I don't even know their names, their real names, but I want to go back for them. Now, if what you say is true, I have to go back for Mimi, don't I?" Yaya sounded sad, concerned.
Yaya felt an inner cuff on the head. "Ouch, Nana! Don't make me hit myself!"
"Sorry, Yaya. You don't HAVE to go back for Mimi. Mimi will just become part of you, if you choose not to let her continue to exist. You'll be a stronger person, again. Even stronger than you are now. You really won't need me!" Nana giggled, very un-Nana-ish laughter.
"Stop that right now, Nana! I need you! I want Mimi! We can all use one body. So I have three mes. So what? I live as Mimi, as being her, since Juliet. I can still do it, until...until the group breaks up. Then, I guess Mimi will have to go away, won't she, Nana?" Yaya's sadness was palpable. She didn't want to be the loss of any life, even if it were an aspect of her own.
"Nah. Don't do the waterworks thing, Yaya. That hurts our head. Mimi will always be part of you, especially once she fades. Where do you think we go, when we fade? Where do you think I was, when I was gone after the concert?" Nana smiled.
"I-I don't know. I guess...inside...me?" Yaya was hesitant.
"Yep. Inside of Yaya! Mimi and Nana merge with Yaya-chan when she doesn't need us anymore." Nana cackled.
"But you won't! I don't want you to merge with me. I want to have you to talk to, to...to be with you. My sister. I love you, Nana-chan. You were there for me when I couldn't handle myself. You saved me from myself. You made my dreams, OUR dreams, come true. You deserve this body as much as I do, if not more!" Yaya couldn't help herself and tears dripped down her face softly.
Yaya felt another cuff on the head by her other self, her dear Nana. "Don't say that, Yaya-chan. It was your body from the beginning. I have no right to be here...not anymore. But I won't leave you, Yaya-chan. Not ever, if you don't want me to."
"So what about Mimi then?"
"Go back or don't. Mimi will still live within you, no matter what. You could always tell them you're Nana, the singer, and that Shohei himself produce you. I think they'd all have heart attacks if you did that!" Nana giggled.
Yaya sighed. "Two of them already know who I am. Who knows if they told the others? I mean, they still don't know Yaya, but they know Nana-chan. They know you. Maybe...maybe now that I'm comfortable in my mundane life, I could give them my card. Or Nana's card. I don't know who's name to put on it. Yours or mine." Yaya blushed, concerned.
"Your name. They already know me. They saw me in concert, right? Well, either way. Mimi-san will live on, either within you or as another you, depending on your decision. It doesn't matter. With three people within you, helping you, you have infinite opportunities. Yaya-chan can do anything. Anything she wants." Yaya felt warmth from Nana, as close to a hug as she could get, both of them being in the same body.
"Y-you're right, Nana-chan. Thank you. For staying with me. For loving me. My sister. Myself. If I could hug you, I would, but all I can do is thank you, now and forever."