Life Styles of the Crazy and Marveled
Summary: Jamie watches too much TV and decides to put on his own version of Life Styles of the Rich and Famous. My god have mercy on my soul...
Dedication: To the anonymous reviewer who suggested the idea. Thank you.
Disclaimer: I own nothing.
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Xavier Institute for gifted Youngsters,
"Salutations everybody, and welcome to Life Styles of the Crazy and Marveled." Jamie Madrox said with a faked British accent. He was wearing a suit and held a microphone in his hand. "Today, we will take a look at the lavish abode of one, Professor Charles Francis Xavier and his students. This spacious Mansion has Twenty-Three Rooms, Seven Bath's, a dinning hall, a full kitchen, and a full working Mini-Bar." Jamie said with a smile as the camera pans around the foyer. Suddenly Logan and Beast pop up out of nowhere.
"Mini-Bar? Where?" Beast asked frantically as Logan grabbed Jamie.
"For the love of Mike, tell us where the Mini-Bar is kid!!!" Logan shouted as he shook Jamie, creating several clones in the process.
"Um, in his study." All of the Jamie's answered, pointing upstairs.
"I told you he was holding out." Logan said as he and Beast charged upstairs.
"TO THE BOOZE!!!" Beast shouted.
"Moving on, " Jaime said redirecting the camera's attention onto him. "Let's start with the bedrooms..."
(Kitty/Rouge's Room)
"Lucky for us both Katherine Pryde and Rouge, um... Rouge are not be here at the moment. Rouge is out with her good friend, Risty Wilde. And young Miss Pryde is on an outing with Mister Lance Alvers." Jamie said as he opened the door to the room. Only to see Kitty in a hot and heavy make-out session with Lance on her bed. "Oh, my..." Jamie said in shock when he saw them. Lance and Kitty looked up to see the Camera. A look of Horror came to their faces.
"GET OUT, GET OUT, GET OUT!!!" Kitty screamed as she hurled various objects at the fleeing form of Jamie. Lance caused a quake that slammed the door shut.
"Um, that was unexpected." Jamie said, straitening his tie. "Lets move on to Young Mister Daniels room..." Jaime said, ignoring the moans coming out of Kitty and Rouge's room.
(Evan's Room)
"Let us see how young Mister Daniels spends his days..." Jamie said as he opened the door. Evan was wearing a strait jacket and foaming at the mouth. He was muttering about Pietro beating him at everything as he banged his head against the wall. "Ah, yes. I forgot this is his time out period." Jamie said as he closed the door. "Sorry about that folks. Let us move on to Miss Jean Grey's room..."
(Jean's Room)
"Young Miss Grey is a Honor student as well as captain of the Soccer team." Jamie said as he opened the door. "As such we should expect to find a well cultured looking room." Jamie said as he walked inside. To Find Jean staring at two pictures of Scott and Duncan.
"Hmmm... Who do I want to string along this week?" Jean said aloud as she moved a finger over the two pictures. "Decisions, decisions..." Jamie and the camera backed away slowly and out of the room.
"That. Was...Interesting." Jamie said as he began to sweat nervously. "Lets move on to Kurt Wagner's Room..."
(Kurt's Room)
"Mister Wagner is an exchange student from Germany. As such we should expect to get a nice cross of German culture and refinery in his room." Jamie said with a smile as he opened the door. Kurt was lying in a pile of Burger wrappers, and condiment packages muttering to himself, his stomach bursting through the bottom of his shirt.
"So many Gut-Busters... So many..." Kurt moaned as he slipped in and out of consciousness. "All for me..."
"Disgusting." Jamie said as he closed the door and walked away. "Lets move on to the Leader of the X-Men, Scott Summers..."
(Scott's Room)
"Scott Summers is also and Honor Student and is also the proud owner of the worlds largest stick, which happens to be in his bum most of the time." Jamie said as he open Scott's door.
"Just take those Old Records off the shelf..." Scott sang out as he danced around in his underwear. "I sit and listen to them by myself..." Scott sand as he used a hairbrush as a microphone. Jamie closed the door immediately
"That was...Disturbing" Jamie said as he wiped his brow. "Lets move on to Professor Xavier's Study..."
(Xavier's Room)
"Professor Charles Xavier is a Nobel Prize winning Geneticist as well as the most powerful telepath on the face of the earth." Jamie said as he opened the door. Xavier was tied up and hanging on the wall, a gag covered his mouth. Wolverine and Beast were drunk out of their minds waving around bottles of liquor at his desk. Storm was dancing on top of the desk in a grass skirt, with Wolverine and Beast waving dollar bills at her.
"Oh dear lord..." Jamie said as he looked on in shock. He closed the door and turned to face the Camera. "Well that concludes our tour of the Xavier Mansion. I'm not even going to bother with the New Mutants quarters because frankly, they scare me. Join us next time when we take a look at The Brotherhood of Bayville Boarding House. Until then, fine living and good day to you all." Jamie said as the camera shut off. "God I live with a bunch of freaks..." Jamie muttered as he went into his room.
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Well I hope you all enjoyed this fic. Stay tuned for the next chapter coming your way as soon as possible. Oh and please review. = )
Peace out,
Descendent
Summary: Jamie watches too much TV and decides to put on his own version of Life Styles of the Rich and Famous. My god have mercy on my soul...
Dedication: To the anonymous reviewer who suggested the idea. Thank you.
Disclaimer: I own nothing.
******************
Xavier Institute for gifted Youngsters,
"Salutations everybody, and welcome to Life Styles of the Crazy and Marveled." Jamie Madrox said with a faked British accent. He was wearing a suit and held a microphone in his hand. "Today, we will take a look at the lavish abode of one, Professor Charles Francis Xavier and his students. This spacious Mansion has Twenty-Three Rooms, Seven Bath's, a dinning hall, a full kitchen, and a full working Mini-Bar." Jamie said with a smile as the camera pans around the foyer. Suddenly Logan and Beast pop up out of nowhere.
"Mini-Bar? Where?" Beast asked frantically as Logan grabbed Jamie.
"For the love of Mike, tell us where the Mini-Bar is kid!!!" Logan shouted as he shook Jamie, creating several clones in the process.
"Um, in his study." All of the Jamie's answered, pointing upstairs.
"I told you he was holding out." Logan said as he and Beast charged upstairs.
"TO THE BOOZE!!!" Beast shouted.
"Moving on, " Jaime said redirecting the camera's attention onto him. "Let's start with the bedrooms..."
(Kitty/Rouge's Room)
"Lucky for us both Katherine Pryde and Rouge, um... Rouge are not be here at the moment. Rouge is out with her good friend, Risty Wilde. And young Miss Pryde is on an outing with Mister Lance Alvers." Jamie said as he opened the door to the room. Only to see Kitty in a hot and heavy make-out session with Lance on her bed. "Oh, my..." Jamie said in shock when he saw them. Lance and Kitty looked up to see the Camera. A look of Horror came to their faces.
"GET OUT, GET OUT, GET OUT!!!" Kitty screamed as she hurled various objects at the fleeing form of Jamie. Lance caused a quake that slammed the door shut.
"Um, that was unexpected." Jamie said, straitening his tie. "Lets move on to Young Mister Daniels room..." Jaime said, ignoring the moans coming out of Kitty and Rouge's room.
(Evan's Room)
"Let us see how young Mister Daniels spends his days..." Jamie said as he opened the door. Evan was wearing a strait jacket and foaming at the mouth. He was muttering about Pietro beating him at everything as he banged his head against the wall. "Ah, yes. I forgot this is his time out period." Jamie said as he closed the door. "Sorry about that folks. Let us move on to Miss Jean Grey's room..."
(Jean's Room)
"Young Miss Grey is a Honor student as well as captain of the Soccer team." Jamie said as he opened the door. "As such we should expect to find a well cultured looking room." Jamie said as he walked inside. To Find Jean staring at two pictures of Scott and Duncan.
"Hmmm... Who do I want to string along this week?" Jean said aloud as she moved a finger over the two pictures. "Decisions, decisions..." Jamie and the camera backed away slowly and out of the room.
"That. Was...Interesting." Jamie said as he began to sweat nervously. "Lets move on to Kurt Wagner's Room..."
(Kurt's Room)
"Mister Wagner is an exchange student from Germany. As such we should expect to get a nice cross of German culture and refinery in his room." Jamie said with a smile as he opened the door. Kurt was lying in a pile of Burger wrappers, and condiment packages muttering to himself, his stomach bursting through the bottom of his shirt.
"So many Gut-Busters... So many..." Kurt moaned as he slipped in and out of consciousness. "All for me..."
"Disgusting." Jamie said as he closed the door and walked away. "Lets move on to the Leader of the X-Men, Scott Summers..."
(Scott's Room)
"Scott Summers is also and Honor Student and is also the proud owner of the worlds largest stick, which happens to be in his bum most of the time." Jamie said as he open Scott's door.
"Just take those Old Records off the shelf..." Scott sang out as he danced around in his underwear. "I sit and listen to them by myself..." Scott sand as he used a hairbrush as a microphone. Jamie closed the door immediately
"That was...Disturbing" Jamie said as he wiped his brow. "Lets move on to Professor Xavier's Study..."
(Xavier's Room)
"Professor Charles Xavier is a Nobel Prize winning Geneticist as well as the most powerful telepath on the face of the earth." Jamie said as he opened the door. Xavier was tied up and hanging on the wall, a gag covered his mouth. Wolverine and Beast were drunk out of their minds waving around bottles of liquor at his desk. Storm was dancing on top of the desk in a grass skirt, with Wolverine and Beast waving dollar bills at her.
"Oh dear lord..." Jamie said as he looked on in shock. He closed the door and turned to face the Camera. "Well that concludes our tour of the Xavier Mansion. I'm not even going to bother with the New Mutants quarters because frankly, they scare me. Join us next time when we take a look at The Brotherhood of Bayville Boarding House. Until then, fine living and good day to you all." Jamie said as the camera shut off. "God I live with a bunch of freaks..." Jamie muttered as he went into his room.
******************
Well I hope you all enjoyed this fic. Stay tuned for the next chapter coming your way as soon as possible. Oh and please review. = )
Peace out,
Descendent