I'll Protect You~By Fujin
Lying in the darkness of their hotel room, Seifer could only look at her with a mix of wonder and adoration. He had a keen sense that she belonged to him, now and always. Ever since the day they had meet this pale woman, too deadly and innocent for the world, was his. This feeling was confusing for Seifer because he had no idea why it was there in the first place. She had always been a friend, nothing more than that. Nothing deserving such reclusive devotion or admiration such as that that Seifer secretly felt for her.
But she was beautiful. Resting on the floor between the twin beds, his eyes automatically searched for her face. She was sleeping on her stomach, her face to one side of the bed so Seifer didn't have to search long. She was already there, crimson eye closed with sleep while the other was covered with a black eye patch, her pale mouth parted a little. Her short silver hair glowed in the frosted moonlight s it brushed against her brow. Oh, to be that soft lock of hair! To be able to caress her flesh and not fear her retaliation because of his tough. Seifer become intensely jealous all of a sudden.
When Fujin murmured in her sleep he waited and watched in anxiety. He hoped he wouldn't wake up and find him staring at her. But after a moment his idle fear vanished when Fujin turned on her back, still sleeping like a kitten. He sighed to calm his raging heart and moved on his makeshift bed of spare blankets to lay on his side, his back to her. There would be no gawking anymore tonight.
When did he start doing this? To wake up in a cold sweat in the middle of the night to stare upon her slumbering form? It hadn't instigated overly long ago, he recalled. Nightmares had been the main reason he had first started to have nights of insomnia only to greet the ungodly bright morning with blood-shot eyes and a sour disposition. Nightmares of war. Nightmares of death and of blood, of destruction and pain. Only he himself ought to keep them hidden from the rest of the world. So he told no one of these reoccurring incubuses.
The nightmares had begun to manifest themselves into his brain shortly after he and his posse. Raijin and Fujin, had regrouped. The day they had found each other one day in Balamb after he had managed to run away from the war. He was more than happy to see them alive but he didn't show it. He only gave a joke on how Raijin did a poorer job catching fish than fighting and grinned a little at Fu. He was forcing arrogance as usual.
After the brief initiation was through(he would always be their leader), they had lunch at a near-by restaurant and blew the rest of the day off down by Balamb's docks. Seifer and Raijin fished while Fu watched them, her pant legs rolled up to the knee to reveal snow-white legs that swung aimlessly off the wooden edge of the dock. An hour had passed while they still had no fish to call their own and fu was getting irritable and board. A swim would have been ideal. Since there weren't any fish in the district she wouldn't be disturbing anything, only the pride of the boys with could easily be healed by a rare smile of hers.
A splash of water had caught both Raijin and Seifer off guard. Raijin looked on in complete confusion while Seifer glared at his wet pants and frowned.
"What the hell…"
His cold blue eyes immediately shot to the disquieted water before the dock. After a moment a silver head of hair broke the liquid surface and one crimson eye stared at him and Raijin, pale lips smiling an unconceivable smile. Raijin laughed as he saw his quiet friend treading water so unexpectedly. But Seifer had exploded, savagely let loose, with a fury of rage. He threw down his fishing rod and glared at Fu with all the disgust and anger he had inside himself.
"Dammit, Fu! What the hell did you do that for? You scared all the fucking fish away!!"
Raijin could only stare at Seifer in dumbfounded silence, fearful and shocked by such unbelievable wrath. No one dared to yell at Fu like that, not even the boss himself could do that. Fujin deserved more. Fujin was a sacred. A Goddess. Had he forgotten? Fujin on the other hand only gave Seifer a sarcastic I'm-so-scared look before swimming reluctantly toward the dock once more. She stopped in the water directly below the jetty, above, which the dark shadow of Seifer fell over her, and glared half-hearted at him.
"You really ought to cool off, Almasy," she told him.
Before he could reply, Fujin grabbed his ankles in his hands and pulled him into the water. He was unprepared for the attack, so he was easily subjected to the watery fall. Plus he never thought that in a million years that Fujin might one day take him down for he weighed a good load more than her strength could handle. He guessed he was wrong. Fujin snickered at her easy conquest and waited for the fallen to break the surface. Overhead she heard Raijin roaring with laugher and she smiled up at him.
When Seifer finally come up he glared at her some more. It must have been an amusing sight to see him look like a wet dog for Fu laughed right in his face! Before of course splashing him with a handful of water.
Seifer smiled at the memory. It had been such a long time since he had heard Fu laugh, and she did have a beautiful laugh. But with the chaotic days of war her laughter often morphed into a cry of rage as she fought by his side unconditionally. He was often scared for her. So scared that the thought of losing her filled his head at night, polluting her dreams with melancholy ghosts.
The sounded of the memory of the day faded now as Seifer willed them away with a heavy sigh. He rolled on his back now, locking his hands behind his head. He was wide awake now, a regular insomniac as he stared up at the shadowy ceiling. He heard the breathing of his friends fill the air with calming rhythmic sound and he briefly closed his eyes. It relaxed his mind, chased away some of the lingering demons, but it didn't seduce him into a sleep. The sound just made him appreciate his friends all the more, to send a little prayer up to God that he still had them.
He didn't know what he would do without them, to fall back on their loyalty and protection as friends. Out of all the people he had known they were the only two who had accepted him the way he was and loved him for it. Two misfits excepting the third. They were his friends until the very end.
He had first stared to look at Fu when his nightmares became too hard to bear. Her face, so serene and beautiful in the moonlight, seemed to comfort his soul, give him the most peace like that arm's of his mother wrapping around him. He liked this feeling. And he hadn't felt so much at ease for a long time. But still even without the nightmares for a night or so he found himself watching her sleep with utter wonder. Why was he so fascinated by his childhood friend-the one he had seen every day in his life for the past eight years? Was if love? He knew it had to be. He loved Fujin. Would he ever admit it? To anyone? To her? He didn't think so. Fujin wouldn't want the love of a fallen knight. She deserved so much more.
With another sigh, Seifer soundlessly rose to his feet. He tried to be as noiseless as possible. He shook the remaining sleep from his limbs before walking silently to the window. It was warm inside the room and he had begun to sweat despite his wearing of only black boxers. He opened the window as wide as it was able to and, leaning upon the polished wooden sill, stared out into the black night. Far down in the harbor the white beams of the moon danced on the dark waves of the sea while a cool salty breeze blew into the room, caressing Seifer's damp forehead.
He stayed there for a while, desperate in his struggle to chase away his abusive devils as he watched the night grow darker and darker. Tomorrow was another day. Tomorrow he would have to face his fears once more, his endless nightmares. Was this his punishment for all he had done during the war? That seemed unfair to him. For that last month or so he barely had a moment of peace. During the day is hours were filled with a hidden remorse; during the night those dark intervals were replenished with nightmares. But at lest with Fu his dreams were forgotten, still a good sleep was usually denied to him.
Ah, screw it, Seifer told himself with a yawn. I can take this. I can get through this. Compared to war, this ordeal is a piece of cake. I just have to be strong.
After a moment, after he felt his exhaustion once again crept into his bones, Seifer turned away from the window. His eyes fell on his shadowy bed on the floor before the leaped straight to Fu's. Even in the darkness he could see her figure sitting upon her bed, arms wrapped around raised knees. Their eyes met instantly. No one spoke. Seifer held his breath, a little shaken. How long had she been sitting there? All the while? Someone he felt exposed at that idea and he desperately fought back the human urge to blush.
She raised her arms out to him. For him to come to her obediately. Seifer stared at her for a moment, scared and confused. What did she want? He looked at her face, her open arms, willing to taken in the fallen knight, full of sins. Was this even his real Fu?
But there was no time to debate the situation. Fujin called him to her. He knew that in his heart he could never turn away from her so he went. Went to her open embrace, felt her arms wrap around him while his arms wrapped about in unison. Even though the night was warm they fell into the bed, holding each other close, telling each other without words how much they needed one another.
"Nightmares," Fu mused softly as she rested on her side. Her head laid against the pillow inches from his. "Don't worry. I'll protect you."
That weary night Seifer's torn soul found a peace he never thought possible. He slept soundly for the first time in a long while in the loving arms of his gentle Fu, his friend and his protector until the end.