Rating: NC-17 (PWP)
Pairing: Su/Sei
Fandom: X/1999
Summary: The Sakurazukamori didn't feel. Love and hate was as alien to him as lethargy and arousal.
In One Go
He didn't like to think about it but when he did, it really was the only logical solution. The man under him had a chest that rarely heaved and breath that never hitched; he never stiffened, never climaxed, never moaned. Subaru had been irrationally happy when summer had begun and even the Sakurazukamori couldn't prevent sweating when they rubbed their bodies against each other, became one in a rush only to part as soon as Subaru was finished.
Subaru had tried to swallow the sounds trying to escape him the first time. As they continued to have sex, he became more laid-back about them. Seishirou didn't seem to mind that Subaru, at least physically, enjoyed bedding him every other night or so. The first time had been quite uncomfortable for both of them.
Subaru had been drunk. His head had been eerily light and it wasn't until he was thrusting in and out of Seishirou that he noticed he had indeed lost his virginity to the murderer of his sister in a way he'd never expected to do.
He remembered all too well the sight of Seishirou pushed against a concrete wall, the naked, white back linked to Subaru's crotch in an absurd, sticky, hot way. Subaru had awakened, then, in the middle of it to see what they were doing. And even though he had known it was stupid, he had stroked the sharp hipbones of the Sakurazukamori tenderly, he had leaned his forehead against the broad shoulders -- the suit had smelled of cigarettes and dust. Subaru often thought how he should have stopped when his daze had ended back then, but?
It had been a luxurious feeling, and it had tempted him, and so he'd gone on, losing his mind. After that first, drunken time he'd never again whispered into Seishirou's ear again; never used those dirty words again. Their taste still remained on the tip of his tongue and whenever they had sex now he remembered the first time and how good it had felt to try and belittle Seishirou.
Subaru didn't consider it a victory. It didn't make anything easier between the two of them yet surprisingly it didn't make things more complicated either.
He pushed himself deep into Seishirou and shut his eyes. Subaru held still. He didn't want it to end so soon, but he was on the edge and he knew would he move now as fast as his body wanted him to it wouldn't last another minute.
Seishirou's cold fingers brushed his cheek and he leaned into the meek gesture. Without a word they had agreed that Subaru looking at Seishirou's face was forbidden. Subaru didn't want to see the emotionless expression anyway. The icy grin would surely make him soften and maybe he wouldn't be able to sleep with Seishirou again after looking into his eyes, one blind, one still that lurid, unnatural color of gold.
Subaru leaned forward. His lips touched Seishirou's and he pressed a kiss on them. He sucked Seishirou's bottom lip, almost opening his eyes when the kiss was returned. Seishirou's teeth scraped his tongue lightly. Subaru shivered furiously. Hot and cold blood ran down his spine, and he couldn't resist a hard thrust.
Seishirou gasped.
Subaru's eyes flew open.
Down the forehead of Seishirou ran drops of sweat. His face was red. His eyes were glassy and heavy-lidded. His Adam's apple bobbed when he swallowed. His mouth hung open a little.
Subaru froze.
"You have always..."