Disclaimer: If I owned Harry Potter, they would be much more obvious with the gay.
Warning: Fairly OOC, TWT, and canonically incompatible.
Pairing/Characters: SS/RL is you tilt your head and squint.
Remus stood just to the side of the door frame, careful to stay out of sight of the Slytherins facing his way, but at an angle which allowed him to watch his friends' backs through the half opened door. He listened with a resigned air as the traditionally ridiculous repartee charged back and forth like a particularly pissed off tennis ball.
"Nice hair ribbon Malfoy. Silk is it? I'm surprised you can afford it, what with that nose job you're still paying for, or did you actually break down and ask Mummy to cover it for you?"
"Been hitting the Muggle Studies books again Black? I don't know much about plastic surgery myself, but perhaps if I ask Potter's Mudblood for some tutoring-"
"Just try it Lucky. I dare you. Let's see if that nickname holds true."
"Don't let him get you too riled Jamie, Cissy's got him too dick-whipped to worry about these days."
"And you would know all about that wouldn't you. I suppose the Most Noble and Ancient House of Black wouldn't be bothered by a little thing like incest."
Remus let loose a silent, irritable sigh and was startled to hear the sentiment echoed. He glanced over his shoulder to see Severus Snape, standing just beside him. Perfectly pressed robes were still swishing a bit with the inertia caused by a quick stop, and his stringy hair was falling over his shoulder, almost long enough to hide his the gleam of his own Prefect badge. Remus was a tad alarmed that he had not at least heard the other boy's footsteps, but under the circumstances he supposed he could forgive himself for tuning out a bit.
Severus did not move to take another step, but he did lean across just far enough towards the door to take a quick glance inside before pulling back and falling sideways to lean against the wall.
The brief invasion of his admittedly over-sized personal bubble brought the not unpleasant scent of mugwort to his nose, and reminded Remus of an incident in Potions earlier that day.
The sound of a deep breath and another sigh made him turn his head towards the other boy.
"I suppose we should get in there then," Severus said in a rather hesitant murmur. "Make them stop or… something."
Remus considered this. The four in there were really quite proficient at dueling, and from previously witnessed skirmishes, he was sure they were all on roughly the same level with both offensive and defensive spells.
Actually, discounting the fairly minor possibility of random catastrophe -- such as one of them actually getting any sort of major hex to make contact (something which would doubtless cause shock and panic all around, and thus effectively put an end to the struggle anyway) – the most significant danger lay in the chance that they would get out of the room, or another student would wander by and someone unprepared would get caught in the crossfire.
Remus glanced up again and deliberately caught Severus's eye.
"Probably," he agreed slowly. His eyes went back to the door. He could no longer see Prongs or Padfoot, but the now incomprehensible words and malicious laughter closely accompanying brief flashes of light suggested that preliminary jinx round had begun. His eyes drifted down to the door knob and he made a point to stare at it for several seconds. "Or…"
He turned to catch Severus's gaze again, trying to will his thought into the Slytherin's head as his own Gryffindor integrity would not allow him to voice it.
Amused comprehension dawned abruptly in the other boy's face. "Or," Snape continued for him, voice more confident now, and as slick as his hair, "We could lock them in."
Remus blinked, startled. It wasn't quite a clone of his plan to just turn around and pretend they hadn't seen anything.
Then again, James and Sirius had been the ones who had thought it would be funny to switch around all of his ingredient labels in Potions that morning.
"All right then," he huffed out. Decision made, he pushed away from the wall and very quietly closed the door, the four inside far too distracted to notice the quiet sound of the latch sliding into place. A smooth movement had his wand out of his sleeve and aimed at the knob.
"Dislodos." he murmured, and watched surprised satisfaction as the dull brass shimmered and melted into the wood of the door. He grinned and said confidentially to the boy at his side, "I'd never actually tried that before."
Severus smirked and snorted and withdrew his own wand. "I guess I have to forgive a first attempt then," he chuckled and aimed took aim at the door.
"Dislodos!" he hissed.
Remus watched in fascination as the entire door shimmered and melted into solid stone.
"You have to include the d sound in the third syllable and stress the second." Severus commented helpfully, before turning and starting down the hall.
Remus continued his examination of the now solid wall until he heard the first alarmed, and very muffled, exclamations from inside.
'One hour,' he thought to himself, and quickly memorized the exact, previous location of the door in relation to the painting of Bailey the Barmy on the opposite wall. A sound that was something between a tormented balloon and a pissed off giraffe made him reconsider. 'Half an hour.'
But in the mean time…
With a quick whirl and an easy smile, he half skipped down the hall until he was walking shoulder to shoulder with Severus.
He turned to the Slytherin, "Speaking of corrections, you seemed to know what you were doing in Potions today."
Severus didn't turn to look at him. He didn't try to avoid him either.
"Why don't you tell mehow you managed to vaporize every scrap of metal in a four foot radius with just fumes. We'll go from there."
Remus flashed him a pleasantly surprised look and he shrugged.
"It's almost the end of the year. Think of the irony if Slytherin wins the House Cup with points got from tutorin a Gryffindor."