Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter or the song "You're Pitiful" by "Weird Al" Yankovic(it is actually a parody song of "You're Beautiful"). Except myself. But I tweaked some parts with my friends' help. Please don't be offended! About the song and to all Harry Potter Lovers don't read this if you will just get angry.
Author's note:
-marie – chan-: Hi! Hi! This is your friend Marie!!! Nope, this isn't the fanfic I was talking about. That one is hard to make. This is something I concocted when I got bored.
-sakura-hime- (marie-chan's friend): Then why did you put it here?
- marie – chan -: Mind you! What are you doing here anyway? Let's talk later.
Now for the story…
You're Pitiful (Not Beautiful)
Marie was walking around the grassy paths of Hogwarts. Then she encountered an angrily muttering Harry Potter. He was very angry. Muttering that he was underappreciated as Marie passed. "Nice!" she said happily.
My life is brilliant, you're life's a joke…
And then Harry tripped and fell. Not only did he fall, he also lost all his money. "Third time this week," Marie thought to herself.
You're just pathetic, you're always broke…
"But there was one thing he was better at than me," she thought "cleaning." She dreaded cleaning their dorm. Oh well! It was better than being broke. "No wonder Harry never had a date, he was loony, even loonier than Luna!" Marie thought.
You're home's as clean as you're uniform. But you ain't impressing me.
You're suffering from delusions of adequacy!
You're pitiful! (3x)It's true!
Never had a date that you couldn't inflate.
And you smell repulsive too.
What a bummer being you!
Next, Marie sat down next to Ron Weasley. He was talking to a newly-calmed Harry, very loudly. Still, he doesn't know about it. "That practice with McGonagall was embarrassing," he said "I kept stepping on her toe."
"Well, have you asked Fleur for a date yet?" Harry asked. "Yes," Ron said as though he wanted to shrink "I accidentally farted in front of her." "She said no, didn't she?" Harry said. Ron looked as though he was going to faint. For safety, Harry changed the topic. "How was your summer job?" Harry said. "Oh," Ron's mood went up "it was great, they wanted me to return next year!" Ron's job was filling cups with Slurpees. As far as Marie knows, Ron loves the game Halo 2 and wearing only shorts at home. And eating Lay's.
Well you just can't dance…and forget romance!
Everybody you know still calls you "Farty – Pants!"
But you'll always have a job, well I mean, as long as you still can work that Slurpee machine.
You're pitiful! (3x) It's true!
You're half – undressed, eating chips of your chest
While you're playing Halo 2!
No one's classier than you!
Next, she encountered a mean Draco Malfoy. "Look guys, it's Marie!" he said mockingly. "Shut up, Malfoy" Marie said "unless you want your dog to fetch you instead of playing alone!" Then he kept silent. "Mama's boy!" I retorted before I left.
La La La La
La La La La
La La La La
LOSER!!!
You're pitiful! (3x) It's true!
You're dog would much rather play fetch by himself…
You still live with your mom and you're 42!
Guess you'll never grow up too…
Well, it just sucks to be you!
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A/n: How did you like it? Please review. I accept praises and constructive criticisms. But I do not accept flames. But if you sent me one, they will be left to rot. Thanks.
This is -marie - chan- signing out...