Time whittles away,
As I think of you,
Sitting here at the computer,
Staring at this blank screen,
And thinking of the way you look at me.
Sometimes it seems you need me,
As much as I need you,
But most times,
You push me away.
And when I finally pull back,
And accept all the facts,
I learn that those facts may be wrong,
And I'm dragged back in again,
Though willingly,
I go back into that confusion,
And fall all over again.
I'm trying not to fall,
For fear that you wont catch me,
But allow me to fall back into that pit,
The pit of depression,
Of which you can throw me with but one phrase.
So now I sit and wonder,
What it is you are thinking at this moment,
And laugh at the answer I give myself,
For I know it is probably true.
So now I write this poem of you,
Because you are on my mind,
I wish I could get you out of my head,
For it's not fair to him,
To have me thinking of you,
But then he doesn't seem willing,
To commit to me,
Though I know it's my fault,
For letting my secret through just enough,
To get me second guessing,
And now I regret what I did to him,
But I also see that I may do it again,
And I'm sure that if you said what I want you to say,
I would in a heartbeat,
Because right now my heartbeats only for you,