Dear my darling Serena,

Its almost Christmas time, our special time. I really miss you and there's nothing more than I want than to be with you right now. But I have to defend our country, to make it a safer place for you. You are the only thing that keeps me going these days. Its freezing out here, like you wouldn't believe. Yet, no snow. I have to go, some thing's happening outside. I can't wait for your next letter. Tell Matt his daddy says hi and that I love him.

Love,
Dan

Serena clutched the letter in her hand, her tears staining the yellow paper that he always wrote on when he sent letters to her. She rested her hands on her stomach, the bump clearly visible. After Dan had left four months ago, she had discovered she was pregnant once again.

"Momma, when is daddy coming home?"

She hurriedly wiped her tears once she heard Matt's voice. She turned and hoisted him into her lap. "Hey baby boy. Momma isn't sure, but he's going to be home soon okay?"

"I want him home for Christmas, mommy. I miss him."

"I know baby, I know. I do too." Serena pressed her tear stained face into Matt's back, doing everything to restrain the tears that threatened to fall. "He's doing his best to get back here okay?"

"Okay momma. Can you tell him I miss him?"

"Of course. In fact, he told me to tell you that he says hi and that he loves you." Serena said, voice trembling. The fact that her husband was out there for them, to make their lives better by keeping the country safe did nothing to calm her.

"Okay momma. Tell him I really want him back for Christmas." Matt hopped off of her lap, smiling sadly at her. "I'm gonna go play with Uncle Nate now, okay?"

"Okay, have fun." Serena smiled, ruffling his hair.

"Oh and momma, today at school, we had Santa come! He was really cool."

"Really? What'd you ask for?"

"I didn't ask for anything!" Matt said proudly, smiling at her. "I asked him to bring something for you though."

"And what is that?" Serena asked, tears now long gone.

"I asked Santa if he could bring daddy back home to you so you'll stop crying and be happy."

"Thank you sweetie." Serena choked out, tears emerging.

"You're welcome. Don't worry momma. Daddy's gonna come back soon. I was good this year."

"Yes you were." Serena smiled, kissing him on top of the head before saying, "Now go, I bet Uncle Nate is getting lonely."

--

"Dan, do you have to go?" Serena asked desperately, clinging onto his army fatigues.

"Baby, I don't want to, but I have to." He held onto her as she sobbed into his chest. "Please don't make this harder okay?"

"What if..what if you -" She cut herself off, unable to go on. Just the thought of him getting hurt tore hear heart in two.

"I won't. I'm doing this for you and I'm coming back to you in one piece, whether you want me or not." He tried to inject some humor into this dreaded event.

"Promise?" She asked, her voice muffled.

"I promise. I love you Serena. I will never leave you." His voice cracked and for the first time that day, she saw tears on his cheeks.

"Daddy!" They broke apart at the sound of their five year old son, Matt. "Daddy!" He called again, running towards them.

"Hey buddy." Dan quickly wiped his eyes on his sleeve, picking up the little Dan look alike.

"I'm gonna miss you a whole lot." Matt said, gripping Dan's shirt so he wouldn't fall off. "You're going to come back soon right daddy?"

"Six months, alright? Then I'll be back for good." Dan promised, voice trembling.

"Okay daddy. I love you." Matt hugged Dan tightly before being set down on the ground.

Dan and Serena watched as their son ran off to talk to Chuck. "I'm going to miss you and Matt every day." Dan said quietly, taking Serena's hands in his own. "Hell, I'm gonna miss you and Matt every second."

Serena let out a humor – less laugh, stepping into his arms once again. "I don't want you to go, I really don't."

"I know, but I'm doing this for our country. I'm doing this for our families. I'm doing this for you and Matt."

Serena felt the familiar sobs shake her body, burying her head into Dan's neck to help stifle the sound. She took a deep, body shaking breath, steadying herself. "Okay." She managed to say, pulling back to look at him. Placing a hand on his cheek, she whispered, "When you come back to me, you are never leaving again, okay?"

He placed his hand on top of hers. "I swear Serena. I will never leave you again after I come back."

Serena smiled the tiniest of smiles before leaning in to press her lips carefully to his. "Be safe." She murmured between kisses.

"I will."

--

Serena sighed as she finished wrapping another one of Matt's present. Four months of no Dan was pure, plain torture. She wasn't sure how she got herself through the months without him. In the morning, she no longer had anyone to wake up to. During the course of the day, she had no one to cook with, no one to argue with, no one to kiss. At night, the bed was empty on his side, so she no longer slept on one side. Just in the middle, where the sheets still smelled like him.

Truth be told, she could find anyone to fill those positions. It didn't even have to be someone she liked, but only Dan could fill those voids. He was the one who created them and the only one to rid them.

She finished wrapping and tucked the presents under the tree where Matt would attack them the next morning.

She trudged upstairs, arms pulling Dan's old gray cardigan tighter around her body. She collapsed onto the bed, arms grabbing the teddy bear she slept with every night, one of Dan's presents that he had given her before he left.

--

Serena woke up with a start, her body shaking. She had had another nightmare about Dan in the war. With clammy hands, she pulled the blanket off of her and made her way downstairs, wrapping Dan's army jacket around herself. She tiptoed past Matt's room and set one hand on the banister, taking one step at a time.

She headed for the living room where the tree was located and let out a piercing scream.

"Merry Christmas." Dan laughed, standing up from his position under the tree. He had grown a few inches while he was away, no doubt from all the exercising. He was freshly shaved, not a bit of stubble on his cheeks and there were muscles in his arms that definitely weren't there when he left. He walked over to her and spun her around, grunting as he did so. "You got bigger."

"Dan.." She was breathless as he set her down and began to kiss her. Her fingers grasped him desperately, hoping that this wasn't just a cruel dream given to her by her mind. "I can't believe you're here." Her hands reached the green ribbon sitting atop his head and ripped it off.

"I'm never leaving you again." He smiled, putting a hand on her stomach. "Are you -"

Tears welled up in Serena's eyes as she hugged him tightly. "I'm pregnant again, Dan. We're having another baby."

"Daddy!" Matt appeared in the doorway, hair messed up and in rocket pajamas. "You're home."

Dan mouthed 'Tell me later' at Serena as Matt ran into his arms. "Whoa! You've grown really tall. Have you been eating all of your vegetables?"

Matt laughed and hugged Dan tighter. "Daddy! I asked Santa to bring you home for mommy and he did! Santa brought you home!"

"You sure bet he did." Dan laughed, an arm snaking around Serena's waist.

"Did you see the Rudolph? Did you get to ride in his sleigh? Did you -"

"How about I tell you the whole story later, son? Why don't we go open presents first?" Dan offered, smiling at the little boy.

"The only present I wanted was for you come home daddy."

Dan smiled, hugging Matt again. "And what about you Serena? What was your Christmas wish?"

"Yeah momma, you wanted daddy to come home too right?"

"Yeah," Serena said softly, kissing Dan's cheek. "All we wanted for Christmas is you, Dan."

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