Disclaimer: Characters belong to Stephenie Meyer, quotes and songs aren't mine either. Only the plot belongs to me :)
"Anybody can sympathise with the sufferings of a friend,
but it requires a very fine nature to sympathise with a friend's success."
- Oscar Wilde.
I never thought I would be in a position like I was at this moment, staring at the screen watching the boy I had once loved, living his dream before my eyes. Watching him brought tears to my eyes, and I swallowed hard to keep them at bay; I couldn't risk crying in front of all of the people I was with. Looking back at the screen into those same green eyes I once knew, the same passion in them that used to bring me to my knees in high school. I see the same strong jawline that I used to pepper kisses along, and those same lips that curved into my favorite smile. I couldn't even tell you what was being said in the conversations around me, or even what song he was singing on stage...everything else washed away as it always had when I stared at him.
Being friends since we were ten, our parents always teased us about being together. I used to tell him everything, even when I got my damn period; he was the first to know. Every first was with him, and after that first kiss it just seemed right to jump into our first relationship, together. I remember the first song he ever wrote me, and the way his voice cracked when he told me he loved me right after playing it. Now, I realize that I did take all of that and more for granted. He said if it were up to him, he would have stayed with me for eternity; that he would never let me go. Since it wasn't up to him though, I was thrown aside to make way for the young it girls of Hollywood, the newest faces of Vogue, because I was too 'plain' for him now. I hadn't seen him for over a year and a half, and even though I see his face on every magazine at the super market, I'd been able to put him behind me.
All of the effort I've put forth it fucking useless now, and I feel every feeling and memory coming back slowly. I vaguely hear Rosalie calling my name, and the guy -some random frat guy- nuzzling my neck, but I can't even comprehend them. Because now, I see him on the screen and see him singing just like he was born to do, and I can't help the watery smile that graces my face. The damn is broken and I remember things like it was yesterday. All of the smiles, the tears, the laughs and frowns, and words that were spoken come back to me. I give Rosalie a poke, and tell her I'm leaving for the night, and wave goodbye to the frat guy. The wind whips me in the face as the doors to the bar open, and I can't help but welcome it, I need it to clear my head. I try to think of the more happier times, watching him on stage at the little whole in the wall, and hearing him dedicating songs to me, "this is for you, Sunshine." Only those close to us would know who he was talking about, and that privacy was a great luxury then, that we took advantage of. As started walking to my car I started thinking about the song he was singing on stage at Jimmy Kimmel Live, I remember when he had wrote it for me on my eighteenth birthday. Of course, ironically, it became one of his biggest hits.
"Do not waste this evening, baby I'm begging you,
your big imagination's playing its tricks on you,
if you think my up and leaving's something I'm gonna do,
feel my chest when I look at you..."
The song still gave me fucking tingles up my spine, and it was just ten-fold when he was singing it to me face-to-face. Finally making it to my car, I got in and cranked up the heat, and started the short drive back to my condo. I was lucky enough to have parents who put enough money away for me to buy a condo, very close to the UW - Medicine campus where I went to school. I thanked the Lord that I didn't have to deal with annoying roommates, especially tonight.
I finally decided to suck it up and stop thinking about him...Edward Cullen had broken my heart over a year ago, and it was about time I got over it. Maybe tomorrow I would even call frat boy. It was about time for me to stop moping over him, even though he is everywhere I go, and now was as good a time as any.
Clean slates were definitely not one of my fortes', but I figured after a good sleep and a nice shower I would feel better. I walked into my apartment to be greeted by the not so new love of my life, Brody...my bulldog. "Brod, baby. I missed you!" I crouched down and got slobbered on, everywhere. It was his way of showing just how much she missed me.
I started stripping off my clothes and walking to my bathroom, a shower was absolutely what I needed right now.
--
I felt completely refreshed after my shower, and completely tired. I felt like I had been hit my a freight train, from the weight of everything I had been thinking of tonight. Calling Brody into my room for bed, I heard him pounding across the floor...he was a tub of lard, but I loved him to death. We climbed on to the bed and I got into the covers, ready to fall into a deep sleep. Right when I was about to fall asleep, I was woken up by my cell phone vibrating on my bed side table. I figured it was just Rosalie asking if I got home okay, and I was just going to let it go, but I got curious so I just checked it. My eyes widened as I saw who the message was from and what it said.
"Bella, I'm coming home."
I guess sleep and forgetting about Edward Cullen wasn't an option tonight.
Song belongs to John Mayer.