Cold
by Ben Barrett

"It feels cold here."

Twilight Sparkle didn't actually speak these words, at least not in the traditional sense. They came to her mind, and she sent the usual signal from her brain to her mouth and vocal cords to bring them to life, but her mouth never moved. Instead, the words seemed to echo all around her, as if someone had placed a microphone directly into her mind and was broadcasting her thoughts. They were clearest the closer they were to her, but as the sound carried into the... black nothingness around her, they grew more garbled and full of static.

She had no idea where she was, or how she'd gotten here. Where were her friends? Where was Ponyville? Where was Equestria for that matter? There was nothing around but darkness that made her feel colder than she'd ever been, and like her attempts to speak, this was different than what she was used to. She didn't feel a physical cold that made her body shake and her teeth chatter, but it was some kind of... internal cold. She didn't know if that was the right way to describe it, but it was the best she had. Instead of a chill that started from the outside and worked its way in, this seemed to emanate from within her.

"Is anyone there?"

She listened to the words she didn't actually speak carry into the distance, if indeed there was any such thing as depth or distance here. The decaying quality was still there, giving her words a sound not unlike a badly tuned radio. No response came back, and she turned to look behind her. The same eternal void greeted her there, and in every direction she looked, including up and down. She considered running ahead to see if perhaps she was just in a cave of some kind, someplace where she'd be able to get her bearings by exploring and feeling around in the dark. Yet she knew this was but wishful thinking. If she were only in a place with no light, she would not be able to see herself, and her mammalian eyes would eventually adjust. The reality of the situation was that she could look down and see her own purple coat, look back and see her large wings and tail, raise her left hoof and see the small scar she bore there from an accident she'd had as a foal. These things were all as clear as if she were staring at them in the noonday sun, but aside from her own body she was completely blind.

"...chrrzt you bzzzztk..."

Her eyes flew open as the sound of another's voice, one distorted and full of static, reached her ears. There was someone else here in this place! If she could pinpoint the direction the sound had come from, she could move closer and be able to pick up what they were saying before the sound waves dissipated.

"Where are you?"

She was getting used to speaking without her mouth, and she hoped that whoever was out there would either move closer or answer her again (if indeed that was what they'd been doing) so that she could hone in on their location. If she had any sense of direction or anything other than black to look at, she would consider using her unicorn magic to simply zap herself closer. She'd discovered this ability shortly after arriving in Ponyville. She and Spike had been surrounded by ponies wanting her extra ticket for the Grand Galloping Gala, and they had been transported to the library. Since then, she'd learned to harness this trick, but she needed something visual to use as a reference point. She couldn't just zap herself toward a void of nothing that looked like the rest of the void of nothing.

"...shhrrtttggg Shhparkle!"

The last had come in loud and clear. Someone was definitely speaking to her, because they'd said her name!

"Yes, I'm here! Wherever here is. Can you help me?"

She summoned her magic to produce a source of light, but her horn sputtered and went out. It had produced only a slight glimmer, and it had illuminated nothing. Was she powerless here? Was there something blocking her magic? She didn't know how. Her magic came from within. Discord had rendered her powerless one time by taking her horn away, but that was...

Discord.

"Discord! Are you behind this?"

There was a familiar laugh that filled the space all around her.

"My stomach!" Discord called between laughs. "Twilight, you've got to see what I just did!"

Twilight ground her teeth. Discord was supposed to be reformed. She'd always known he couldn't be trusted.

"Harmony in Equestria is officially dead," Discord went on.

"Discord!" Twilight replied. "Show yourself!"

Instead of the familiar spirit of chaos that she was expecting, a bright square of color appeared before her. In that space that seemed to go on for miles, there was every color of the rainbow, and even two she'd never seen. The colors blended together in a swirling vortex and began forming into shapes. She saw herself, gray and downtrodden, with Discord floating over her head, crowing over his victory. This was... a replay of their first encounter with him. But how had that happened?

"Come now, Twilight Sparkle," Discord said, taking the pink cloud raining down on her and placing it on a cone. "You've got to get into the spirit of things!"

She'd heard of ponies who had almost died seeing their lives flash before their eyes. Is that what this was? Was she dead? She didn't think so. For one thing, why had it taken so long for her to see anything, and why only this one event? Why not her whole life? Furthermore, she didn't remember dying at all. She... didn't remember what had been happening shortly before she found herself here, but she was certain she hadn't been taking her last breath.

"Oh, this is all so confusing!" she cried. "If only Princess Celestia were here!"

The image of Discord, which was now of him skating merrily along a road of soap, blended back into the rainbow vortex. When the swirling cleared again, she saw her old teacher, Princess Celestia, standing regally as Twilight approached.

"Twilight! It is so lovely to see my star student!"

"Well, I'm so excited to be here. We have so much to catch up on!"

Twilight Sparkle watched this scene and many others play before her. She had no idea what was going on, but speaking the name of someone she knew seemed to bring up memories she had of them. It was an interesting phenomenon, but it wasn't getting her any closer to figuring out what this place was or her purpose for being there, or why it seemed to be getting colder.

She turned from the image and saw from the corner of her eye that it dissolved back into black as she did so.

"Hello out there!" she called. "Can someone help me make sense of what this is? Please?"

Begging for help from unseen individuals wasn't getting her anywhere, and it wasn't like her. Twilight Sparkle was a take action kind of pony. She was a thinker first and foremost, giving every situation the utmost consideration, but when she had to be proactive and get things done, she was more than capable.

She began galloping into the dark, hoping that she was actually making some kind of progress and not just running in place. When there was nothing but emptiness all around you, did moving actually get you anywhere, or did the emptiness move with you?

"...fffkkkttttsssh move. Don't kffff... where you are, Twikrrrrrr..."

Twilight caught enough of that to understand it. She stopped dead in her tracks.

"Okay," she replied. "I won't move. Can you tell me who you are?"

"ksssssack. It's frrrsssss..."

Was it Applejack? She didn't know anyone else whose name ended with ack. Then again, maybe it was a stranger communicating with her. Maybe she didn't know this person at all. Come to think of it, did she really want to communicate with an unseen voice in an empty void? If this pony or whatever it was told her to stay where she was, should she do the opposite and run as fast as she could? Obviously, if she was being told to stay put, then moving wasn't in vain. She was headed toward something. She didn't know what, but whatever it was, her companion (if that was the right word) either didn't want her to go near it or wanted to get to her before she did.

What if they're dangerous? What if I'm heading toward an escape and they want me to stop so that can try to kill me?

The cold that she'd felt from inside at the outset was much stronger. She was so icy that she felt as though it might be seeping into her bones, stiffening her marrow. And it was getting worse.

"Tell me your name again!" she said.

"fffshtash. Rainbow Dash. It's Rainbow Dash. Just krrray put. I'm kkkkming."

The voice was much clearer that time, and it was not Rainbow's voice. Whoever was communicating with her was lying. And that meant they were no friend of hers. It was certainly not honest Applejack, who would never lie to her. In fact, the mysterious unseen speaker didn't sound like anypony she'd ever met.

The cold was so bad it was almost unbearable.

She began galloping again, and this time she went as fast as her purple hooves would allow.

"No, stakkk... Don't mofffssh..."

It was breaking up again and the cold within her seemed to lessen. She took that as a sign that she was putting distance between herself and the thing that was coming for her.

Good.

"grrrshilight Sparkle! It's Prrssshhh...elestia! Don't be a fool! hrrrrr..."

The static was clearing up, the cold was growing again, and whatever was clearly chasing her was now claiming to be her mentor, Princess Celestia.

"Oh, I need light!" she cried into the dark in her desperation. "Or at least some sense of direction!"

As if summoned by her words, a small glowing ball of energy appeared in front of her. It was pink in color and seemed to lessen the cold invading her every cell. She was so surprised to see it show up like that that she stopped in mid-gallop to keep from running into it. It regarded her for a moment, then zoomed off to the right. It stopped several yards away, as if waiting. She took off after it, and it stayed ahead of her, darting this way and that.

I saw people I knew when I said their names. I saw the ball of light when I called for it. Can I speak things into existence here?

"Sun in the sky!" she yelled. "Put a sun in the sky!"

Immediately, the void was crowned with a distant ball of fire and heat. It did wonders for the cold within her, but the mysterious voice didn't like it.

"fffsht No, turn it off! hssss... ake it away!"

"Not on your life, buddy! Dirt, trees, atmosphere!"

What was once black erupted into color as the nothing that was the ground became brown dirt, the nothing that was the sky became blue as the previously created sun shone through it and trees exploded from the new soil like fireworks. The small ball of light seemed delighted and did circles around several trees.

"What have you done?" the voice called.

With something around them, sound waves no longer dissolved. She could hear the voice clearly, though it was still distant. She couldn't tell how distant, though.

"Cover the ground with dry leaves and sticks!" she shouted, and she found that she was using her mouth to speak again.

As before, what she called for happened, and she could hear her pursuer less than a quarter mile away, cursing because his footsteps were no longer silent. And it was a he. That was no longer a question. He couldn't use empty nothing to try to hide his identity or his intentions any more. Whoever he was, he was not an ally. The fact that he was still chasing her and had, on multiple occasions, claimed to be someone he wasn't, told her that he could not be trusted.

The ball of light zoomed around a bend and up a hill. Twilight followed, but found that filling the void with a world had a downside as well. While in whatever that nothing had been, she had been free of the restrictions of normal biological functions, including weariness and shortness of breath. Now that there was air around her again, she was growing tired as she followed the light. By the time she reached the crest of the hill, she was actually panting. She looked behind her at where she'd come from. Crashing through the trees and leaves was something, though it didn't seem to have a distinct shape. It was a mass of darkness that was rapidly changing shapes. It would take three steps as Rainbow Dash, then morph into Fluttershy, then Spike, then...

She didn't understand what she was looking at, but knew she couldn't afford to stand there studying it. It was getting closer, and that coldness within her was growing again. It was helped by the friendly ball of light and the sun overhead, but even these two benign forces could not completely eradicate the wintry feeling that this monstrosity caused.

"Cage for the thing chasing me!" she declared.

A heavy iron cage materialized around the black mass, and it slammed against the bars again and again, frustrated and angry. With each slam, it would change shapes.

"Twilight! Come back!" it shouted. Slam! Discord. Slam! Princess Luna. Slam! Pinkie Pie. "It's all a trick!"

A trick?

She ran after the ball again. It took her down the opposite side of the hill to the mouth of a dark cave. It fluttered around her head, then zipped inside.

"Odd," she said. "I don't remember calling for any caves. I didn't even call for rocks."

She had a bad feeling about this. Where had the cave come from, and why had the light vanished inside without even waiting for her? She heard the creature shouting in the distance and she looked back over her shoulder.

"Don't do it!" the voice, now distant, pleaded.

She considered the cave, considered the monster, and considered the strange world she'd found herself in. Could she trust anypony or anything?

"Give me a doorway back to Equestria."

For once, nothing happened.

"Get rid of the cave."

Again, nothing happened. That was strange.

"A glass of water."

Not so much as a raindrop appeared.

"What's going on?"

Before, she could summon things by speaking them. She'd made the sky, the dirt, the trees, the sun, the... A thought occurred to her then. What if she hadn't? What if she hadn't made any of those things? What if everything around her was just an illusion? She thought the first thing she'd spoken into existence was the ball of light, but what if she was wrong? What if the ball of light was not a friendly guide as she had assumed? What if... whatever the ball was had simply taken the form of a light so that she'd trust it, and had made all of this appear on demand so that she'd think she'd done it?

Then if the ball of light is tricking me, maybe...

She looked back at the cave, then ran back toward where she'd left the mysterious creature in a cage. It was still there, though it was no longer throwing itself against the bars and changing shape. It had settled into a black mass that resembled a dark storm cloud and it seemed to be weeping. At least, that's the sound it was making when Twilight walked up.

"Who are you?" she demanded. "Tell me the truth."

It was freezing cold here. Why did she always feel this way around this thing?

"Let me out of this cage," it said. It seemed to have the voices of everyone she ever met, all speaking at the same time.

"No," she replied. "I want answers. Besides, I can't make the cage disappear."

"This is a funny place," the cloud said. "You only see what you think you should."

"I don't understand."

"You thought you could make things appear, so they did," the cloud explained. "When you no longer believed it and started thinking the light was tricking you, it stopped happening. You never knew who or what I was, or what I wanted with you, so you saw and heard everypony you've ever met. When you stopped running from me, I stopped changing. Now I am everything and nothing."

"Who are you really? And why am I so cold when you're around?"

"Because you're afraid of me. You associate fear with cold, and because you had no idea who I was or where you were, you always felt warmer when you thought I was further away from you. You thought the light was your friend, so it made you feel warm as well."

"So the light isn't my friend?"

"The light is something you made up yourself. It isn't any more real than the ground, or the trees, or the sun, or this cage. There are only three things real in this place: you, me and the cave."

"Tell me about the cave. What is it?"

The cloud didn't answer right away. It seemed to be pondering her question, or maybe the best way to answer it, or maybe whether to lie to her. She didn't know! She wasn't sure what to believe anymore. Every time she thought she had things figured out, she'd find she was mistaken.

"The cave leads on."

"I don't understand."

That seemed to be the common theme of the day.

"The cave is a doorway to another place, one where I can't protect you. There are two ways out. The cave is one of them. The other can't be found on foot. You asked for a light to guide you, and the light took you to the only place there was to guide you to. I can show you the other, if you but remove the cage."

She no longer felt cold, which she took as a good sign. It meant that it had at least told her the truth about that. Could she trust that it had been honest about everything? She didn't seem to have any other choice. She wouldn't escape from wherever she was on her own.

She thought back on its words, that she could change things if she believed she could. She focused her will on removing the cage, and to her surprise it started to fade away.

"Yes, that's it," the cloud said. "You're doing it."

"You still haven't told me who you are," she said. Then she stopped trying to imagine the cage away. "Come to think about it, every time I've asked you, you've dodged the question."

"It isn't important right now!" the cloud insisted, and she could hear the desperation in its voice. "There are more pressing matters!"

She reversed her will and made the cage stronger, and smaller.

"No, I think it's very important. Tell me who you are, or the cage gets smaller!"

To emphasize this, she shrank it again. The cloud roared in frustration.

"Are you my friend or not?" she demanded. "Tell me the truth!"

"Of course I am!" the cloud said. "I want to help you."

"Then tell me your name!"

She turned her head to the left, and her friends Applejack, Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy appeared. She turned it to the right, and Pinkie Pie and Rarity were there. All of them bore the Elements of Harmony around their necks, and all looked prepared to use them. Twilight smiled as her own tiara materialized.

"You can't do that!" the cloud said. "Your friends aren't real. The Elements won't work here!"

"You're so silly," Pinkie Pie told him with a giggle. "You just said she can make anything happen that she wants."

"And really," Rarity chimed in, "you've behaved in such a ghastly, unpredictable manner that we wouldn't blame her at all for wanting to give you what you deserve."

"But I-" the cloud stammered.

"Tell her what she wants to know or we'll kick your butt!" Rainbow Dash threatened.

Twilight's horn began to glow. The glow gradually grew brighter and the cloud shrank back in fear.

"All right! All right!" it moaned.

Twilight dispelled her magical charge and the light went out.

"Start talking!" she demanded.

"Fine," the cloud said. It became a swirling vortex of color, just like Twilight had seen earlier, then it formed into a familiar figure. It became... her. Twilight Sparkle was looking into a darker and more bitter version of her own face. This Dark Twilight Sparkle had a coat of deeper purple with flecks of black, and the same was true of her eyes, which were filled with anger and had tiny black spots that seemed to dance within them like sand in a windstorm.

"Wha-"

"Surprised?" Dark Sparkle asked with a smirk.

"I- I-"

"I am the side of yourself that you don't want to see," Dark Sparkle explained. "I am the darkness that dwells inside of you, that darkness that you run from and try to pretend isn't there. You have seen but glimpses of me throughout your life. When I approached you here in the dark recesses of your own subconscious, you ran because you were afraid. You didn't know me or recognize my voice when I spoke to you. I was the one who brought you here."

"Why? Why am I here? What do you want with me?"

"Nothing more than for you to let me be a part of you. You act so perfect all the time, like you have no flaws. You blockade me in this dark place and put on a front of... what was that term Rainbow Dash once used? Goody Four-Shoes?"

The Rainbow Dash standing by Twilight laughed.

"Goody Four-Shoes!" she cackled. "That's a good one!"

Both Twilights ignored her.

"Is that the other way out you mentioned?" Twilight asked. "To let you be a part of me?"

"No," Dark Sparkle replied. "The first way out is the cave, as I told you. The cave leads to a place neither of us want you to go. I don't know what's down there, perhaps a deeper level of your subconscious where things darker than even myself dwell. I do know that if you go through that doorway, you will never be the same again. The other way out is to simply will yourself to wake up. Realize that this is all happening in your head, but that does not make it any less real. I will warn you that if you leave this place and go back to being an insufferable bootlicker, I will bring you here again. And again. And again. There is no respite from me. I am part of who you are."

"She could just blast ya to Kingdom Come, ya know," the Applejack clone said. "End ya once and for all?"

"Are those copycats really necessary?" Dark Sparkle asked, annoyed.

"Yes," Twilight said. "And she's right. I could do that. Or I could just leave you here in this cage. I think the way you were crying when I came back, if I left the cage when I wake up, it would stay in place."

"You wouldn't dare," Dark Sparkle said, narrowing her eyes dark purple eyes. "You need me, if only to feel normal every now and again. When you break some rule, that's me. That day you enchanted your silly doll and made the whole town go crazy? That was me. I add flavor to your life. I am an indispensable part of you. Without me, you're nothing but a doormat."

Twilight turned from the cage and began walking away. She would return to the top of the hill and there she would make her decision. She would either will herself awake, or see for herself if Dark Sparkle was lying about the cave. She didn't think so, but she had never been the kind of pony who left anything to chance. She would-

"Tell me, Twilight," Dark Sparkle called from behind her, "how long will you continue to strive for perfection you will never attain? How long will you continue writing letters and driving yourself mad with checklists and deadlines? How long will you continue selflessly making everyone else happy while you rot away in obscurity?"

Twilight turned back, angered by Dark Sparkle's words.

"What do you mean?" she demanded. "I'm not rotting-"

"Oh, come now, Twilight!" Dark Sparkle exclaimed, cutting her off. "You can lie to others, but not to me. After all, you don't represent honesty; Applejack does. Do you see yourself as above deception, or do you honestly not realize what the truth actually is? You and your little friends there have saved Equestria numerous times. You've bent over backwards for that slave driving tutor you call Princess Celestia, hammering out letters and never making time to find any friends. Or have you forgotten you were so caught up in being a good student that you didn't have a friend in the world other than that insufferable dragon until you went to Ponyville?"

Dark Sparkle stopped long enough to let a small grin appear on her muzzle.

"You do all of these things, going crazy trying to keep everyone and everything in line. You drive yourself to the point of collapse fixing the problems of others. Yet still you sit in your silly treehouse in a tiny bumpkin town, your legacy etched in a stained glass window and your eventual grave marked in a lonely country plot. Where will your grave be, Twilight? Will it be behind Applejack's crumbling barn? Perhaps beneath the sweet shop trash cans? You are so perfect you're invisible. By the time the two thousandth Summer Sun Celebration arrives, no one will even remember you existed. And you know it."

Twilight glared at her.

"You think I care about fame?" she asked.

"Fame?" Dark Sparkle replied. "No. Not fame. You do care, however, about being the kingdom handkerchief. Everyone comes along and blows their problems all over you, and you silently take it and smile. It bothers you a great deal. How much were you looking forward to the Grand Galloping Gala? You so longed for time with your precious Celestia, and she barely glanced at you. Then she had the gall to show up later and tell you that the smoldering ruins you and your friends left her party in made it more interesting. As if that makes up for her indifference.

" You don't have to be such a cowering mongrel dog, Twilight. You don't have to strive to be a glimmering example of perfection. Just release this cage and let me be a part of you. I can help you realize that it is okay to have flaws, to make mistakes, to be a little bad from time to time."

Twilight hated hearing this, not because she disagreed, but because she knew everything that Dark Sparkle was telling her had at least glimmers of truth. She had felt rejected by Celestia, and she had often pushed herself to exhaustion to meet the expectations of others. Yet, that was just who she was. She liked being a model student. She enjoyed having others turn to her with their problems or look at her with respect and admiration when she fixed some problem or stopped a catastrophe. And yet...

"What if I refuse?" Twilight asked. "What if I just leave you there in that cage forever?"

"You can do that," Dark Sparkle said, "but I don't think you will."

"Why not?"

"Because if you were going to do that, you wouldn't have come back. You're standing so close now I can see the doubts and insecurity in your eyes. Did you even realize that you'd walked back to me? Or that those silly clone friends you made dissipated like smoke several minutes ago?"

Twilight looked around in shock. She hadn't been aware of either of these things.

"Make your choice, Twilight," Dark Sparkle said. The black flecks in her eyes were moving faster now, almost as if they were dancing with anticipation. "The time for discussion is over. You know what's at stake. You know what will happen if you leave me here to rot away. The same will happen to you in the physical world. You will rot."

And finally, Twilight did.

Twilight's friends were gathered around her when she regained consciousness. They weren't sure what caused her sudden collapse. She'd been bustling about her library, talking about Pinkie Pie's upcoming party, when she'd just stopped mid-sentence and crumbled into a heap. They had sent a letter straight away to Princess Celestia and she had come on the run, but not even she could bring Twilight out of whatever comatose state she was in. The sight of her eyes fluttering open filled them all with relief.

"Dang, sugar pie," Applejack said, "you had us all worried sick."

"Are you all right?" Celestia asked, moving in close.

"Oh, I'm fine," Twilight replied with a smile. "Just overworked myself, I guess. You know I'm always stressing out over something. Guess this time it just got the better of me."

Celestia smiled back at her, but couldn't help but feel a bit uneasy. There was a certain edginess in Twilight's tone that had never been there before, her smile seemed a bit more painted on, and she didn't think she'd ever seen those dancing flecks of black in her eyes before. They were moving rapidly, gleefully, as if they were celebrating something...

Fin