Legends of Guardians in a Nutshell
First off this I did this in middle of science so for all you LOG fans look away I mean no disrespect but I just want this for a laugh copyright to owners. Thanks LydeaBlaze for giving me a basic idea of what the fuck I'm talking about.
Have fun
Wolf
First the Tree was like WHOOOOOOOOOSH! Then the Owls were like FUWHOOOOOSH! Then Glaux was like I don't care about anything blah then the Pure Ones were all evil bah. Then the Guardians were like good blah. Then there was a massive gun battle like BRRRRRRRRRBBBBBBBBBBANGBANGA BANG and then the Pure One Queen had two husbands one was totally like BeakMetal and other was Steve Then this chick LydeaBlaze created a bunch of Owl Gods. Like Cheyenne who was like i'm the sun bitch and Barran who was like the moon. And then the sun and the moon had a massive laser battle like PEW PEW BEEEEEEEEAOWWWW!
Then there was Nyra was like the Pure One Queen she was pissed so the Guardians and the Pure Ones went to war like with guns and swords okay not guns but if they did it would be so cool like BRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR and BABANGBABANGBABANG but they totally had Lightsabres like WA WA WA WA WA and DA DA DAN DAAAAAA okay so no Lightsabres and the Guardians were like NEEEEEEEEEEEEAOWWWWWWWWWWW like the plane coming in. then an oxymoron came in and started beating the shit out of people only that didn't happen. So then BeakMetal was battling Soz and Soz kicked his fat ass in the fire and BeakMetal was like NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOO! And Soz was all like DIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE! And the whole this is Sparta thing. So after all this crazy shit then we find out that owls have jobs and blacksmiths and no guns or Lightsabers makes perfect sense so in conclusion Kathryn Lasky is the world's biggest bitch with a capital B and Glaux is about as helpful as a human in Owlland Ga' Hoole whatever it can the magic Owl kingdom for all I give a shit.