My eyes widened as the pain slashed across my face, one hand immediately rose and brushed against the stinging skin. "I'm sorry," I whispered and looked at the ground.

Eric glared at me, "sorry isn't going to cover it," he hissed and leaned close to my ear, "you lied."

Tears rolled down my cheeks, flashbacks of times prior we had enjoyed together only made the current moment more haunting. "I didn't mean too."

"Didn't mean to?" His face grew colder, "how can you not mean to have sex with someone?"

"I'm sorry," I wasn't sure which was worse; how much I had hurt Eric, or the fact that I had cheated on him to begin with.

He raised his hand and I flinched and closed my eyes, "If you hated being with me so much you could have said something!"

I opened my eyes as Eric lowered his hand and walked towards me, I flinched when his shoulder hit mine as he brushed past. I turned around and watched as he headed down the sidewalk away from me, not looking back. "I didn't hate being with you," I whispered tears rolling down my face. I wiped the wetness away, "I loved you."

I hurried home, the dark clouds over head foretelling rain. My house seemed foreboding and I wasn't even sure if I wanted to deal with my sister or mother right now. My father died two years ago, and since then my mother had become clingy to her children.

Strangely though, neither greeted me to the door of our apartment and I happily hurried to my room and sat down on my bed. Jumping when the phone rang, I leaned over to the side-table where sat my cordless phone lay and blinked at the ID.

" Eric?" I paled slightly as I held the receiver to my ear.

"Goodbye…"

"What?" I gasped and gripped the phone tighter, "what did you say?"

"I'm sorry…" the line went dead and I pulled the phone away and stared at the plastic, my hand trembling at the dead tone of his words.

"Whose was that?" My little sister stuck her head through the door as I hung up the phone.

I looked up at her and paled slightly, "Eric."

Anna giggled and stepped into my room, "your boyfriend?" She put a heavy emphasis on the word 'boyfriend' and dragged it out in length in a musical tone.

I paled an even lighter color and covered my looked away, "maybe…"

Anna giggled more and skipped towards me, "he must love you, he calls you, like, everyday."

I blinked and pushed her out of the room, leaning against its smooth surface to hold it shut. Anna leaned against the wood, "by the way, mom wants you to go to the pharmacy and pick up her medication."

"Alright," I called back, her previous words still filling my mind. My eyes fell to the floor, "…he does love me…doesn't he." With slow steps I pulled myself in front of the mirror and ran a hand through my brown hair, several months ago we had started going out and already I was growing bored. "Whore," I muttered under my breath and glared at the disgusting person the mirror reflected.

I pulled away from my reflection and collapsed on my soft bed, the words 'he must really love you' ringing in my head. I stood slowly, depression settling over and I walked towards my window. I didn't bother to think as I threw open the glass and leaned outside, looking down to the concrete ground six stories below. Dizziness settled over, someone like me didn't deserve to live; I had hurt Eric so much. I closed my eyes and leaned forward. "I'm sorry, Eric." Suddenly I was falling, I didn't scream; I didn't need too. The air whipped past my face, and the six seconds of free fall were chilling. In those few moments the world became painfully clear, reality much more real. I had made a mistake, this was stupid, why had I jumped and left my sister and mother alone. Now all I was doing was hurting more people, maybe I'd survive. I opened my eyes slowly just in time to see the ground. The world flashed white in pain, then black, then nothing. A gate...

---

I jerked my eyes open and found myself staring at the most clear blue sky I'd seen. The grass was soft and the air smelled clean and fresh. I pulled myself into a sitting position and looked around, "is this heaven?" I whispered out into the air.

I twitched and jumped up, as my memories returned; there was no way I'd be in heaven unless they changed their standards by a good amount. I turned in a complete circle until I layed my eyes on what appeared to be a city in the distance. Somehow, I couldn't find my thoughts collected enough to understand how I had come to this place, nor why the image of a tall stone gate filled my mind.

I suddenly felt a need to vent and began kicking a tree roughly, despite the bruising it gave my toes. I glared at the tree as I stepped back, wishing it didn't exist, wishing it could suffer like me. And then it was gone.

I screamed and lept back staring hard at the spot the tree had stood, but only a hole with many tunnels where roots may have grown remained. I glanced at a rock and wished it to go away, and the rock complied instantly.

I looked around myself in shock, this was definetly a dream; I was probably in a coma.

With careful steps I turned in another circle, could my mind really create such vivid and life-like detail? Most of my dreams were hazy, and if it was a dream I wouldn't be able to think as clearly. There has never been a time in my past that I could think and feel so clearly while sleeping.

But maybe a coma was different.

I looked at where the tree had been, wondering where the tree had gone, all logical laws stated that the mass would have to go somewhere...but where?