Breathe in, breathe out. Breathe in, breathe out.

Mira stared at the ceiling of her small room on Star Command, desperately trying to focus her mind on anything other than the emptiness inside her, the emptiness that was crying out to be filled. Shivers ran down her spine and she hugged her knees, curling up in a fetal position on her bunk.

"O-One... Two... Th-Three..." she whispered painfully, counting her breaths and ignoring the nausea threatening to overwhelm her. Beads of sweat glistened across her face and neck, giving her a feverish appearance. Her senses seemed heightened, and all around she could sense it - throbbing, pulsating, running through every wall. Everywhere she turned she felt tantalising traces of energy, whispering to her and urging her to experience their power again. There was no escaping its insidious presence.

"Just leave me alone!" she yelled, burying her head beneath the pillow. I should be over this by now. She'd been off the energy for a month already... so why did she still have nights when the cravings were as strong as they were the day she quit? Why can't I stop wanting it? This is pathetic!

Her body quivered as she sobbed silently, her fingers gripping the sides of mattress. I hate this. I hate this. I hate this.

How could she ever be whole again after she'd been on top of the world and then come crashing down? She'd been stronger, faster, happier, better than she'd ever been in her life. And now all that was gone - she'd let it go, for her own safety and for the safety of the people she loved. She'd given it up and she knew that was the right choice... But it was taking all her will power to stop herself from trying to get it back.

"I don't want this," she sobbed. "I just want things to be normal again!" She wanted to be able to wake up and not feel like a star cruiser had run into her. She wanted her world to get back on its axis again, for her mind to stop running back to those feelings of euphoria, for her feet to stop pulling her towards the fusion reactor every time she walked past, and most of all for the emptiness to just go away.

But until that happened, all she could do was survive. Just breathe.

Breathe in, breathe out. Breathe in, breathe out.