Better
Another songfic, based on 'Better' by Regina Spektor. This is my... third published fan fic.
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto.
If I kiss you where it's sore,
Will you feel better,
Better,
Better,
Will you feel,
Anything at all?
Sakura sighed as she lay down on her bed. A big bed in a lavish room, in a large house. But she was far from happy. It was the middle of the day, all she really had to do was sleep. Sometimes she slept all day, waiting. She was always waiting. For him.
Gaara.
Sometimes she wondered if someone had pressured him into their relationship. He never showed any sign of loving or even liking her. He was devoid of emotion at the best of times. He saw his pink haired girlfriend as a possession, nothing else. And not even a very precious one. Even the 'love' they shared was really nothing more than rape.
It was at times like this, alone in the giant house while Gaara was away, doing his duties, that Sakura felt like going home, giving up. But she wanted to stay. She wanted to be the one who taught the cold and unemotional sand ninja to love.
She stared at the ceiling, lying on her bed. She never had anything to do. Not since she moved to Suna with Gaara. She didn't get to do anything as a ninja anymore, except when she went back to visit Konoha. Sometimes she suspected that their relationship was nothing more than a political move towards alliance.
A tear leaked out of her eye. She had to prove herself wrong. By tomorrow, he would love her, she resolved, wiping away the tear hastily.
So she waited for him once more, but downstairs on the lounge.
About an hour later, and almost asleep, she heard the whisper of footsteps outside. Her heart began to beat faster. They had been together for so long, and still Gaara scared her.
He came through the door and glanced over at her on the couch.
"Just you…" He grunted, and walked into the kitchen for food. Sakura sighed again and stood up, following him into the room.
"What do you want?" He growled at her, looking up from his food.
"Nothing… Well, uh, I just wanted to talk…" She said weakly. His glare made her legs tremble.
"About what, Haruno?" He asked her, not looking at her anymore.
"I don't mind." She answered. "Anything."
"Anything? We just talked." He put away his plate and sat back down. "Happy?"
"A-are you?" She asked uncertainly. "Happy I mean."
Gaara seemed taken aback. "What do you mean?
"With our relationship. I don't know, you just, don't seem to care that much about me…" She trailed off at the end, realizing how forward it was.
He paused, trying to think how to answer her. "I think you're… I mean, I'm happy enough, Haruno."
Sakura sighed for the third time. She thought she had gotten through to him, but he dashed her hopes. She sat down across from him with her head in her hands.
"Do I really mean that little to you?" Sakura said in almost a whisper.
Gaara was silent. "Hnh." He grunted and stood up, walking off to have a shower.
"Fuck…" She whispered to herself. "So close."
There was no conversation over dinner, Temari was in Konoha and Kankurou was simply 'away'.
"I'm going to bed." Sakura told Gaara after she finished. Maybe if she was asleep before he got there, she could avoid his misguided 'love' for a night. Maybe.
After changing into her pyjamas, she curled up on one side of the bed, willing herself to go to sleep.
Not soon enough, however, as she heard the door opening and Gaara climbed into the bed next to her.
"Need proof that I still love you?" He whispered in her ear in an amused-sounding voice. Sakura trembled with fear and apprehension as she turned to face him. He had that same look in his eyes as always, the same possessive, dominating look.
But this isn't love… She thought, not game enough to say it out loud.
But Gaara was gentler that night. Maybe she had made some sort of an impression on him.
She woke up the next morning, and Gaara was already gone. She closed her eyes again, and drifted off to sleep again.
She woke up at midday again. Gaara still wasn't home. It was tomorrow. He still didn't love her. He didn't even call her by her real name.
"That's it." Sakura told herself. "I'm… l-leaving." She found a piece of paper to write on and, lost for words, wrote the first things that came to her head.
Thank you for everything.
I'm sorry, I have to go.
I just don't think you will ever return my feelings.
Goodbye…
She felt strangely sad leaving the house she had so often felt trapped in.
But she ignored the feeling and set off, out of the house, out of Suna, into the desert…
Gaara came home and looked around the living room for Sakura. He… did need to talk to her. She wasn't in their room, she wasn't in the kitchen. But there was a note.
As he read it, an unexpected tear ran down his face.
He ran out the door, following the same route she had, out of the city.
"Sakura!" He yelled and ran into the desert.
Sakura was walking, tired already in her journey. Three days… She thought. And I'm already tired.
She sighed and looked behind her. It was exactly the same as in front of her. But… there was someone behind her. Someone familiar. Red hair, black clothes…
Gaara? She was surprised. He bothered going after her?
"Sakura!" He yelled as he caught up to her, out of breath.
"Wh-what did you say?" She asked, eyes round.
"Sakura…" He was unsure what to say. "I-I love you."
Before she had a chance to reply, he kissed her.
Maybe they had made love, but not once had he ever kissed her in that act of domination and possession.
This, was an act of love.