A few words of warning: First, I don't think the beginning chapters are very good. Magus's dream is a joking reference to my days as a horrible Mary Sue, and makes no influence on the rest of the story – rest assured, there are no self-references beyond the first few paragraphs. Also be aware that in my vision of Chrono Trigger, Frog is gay. This is not a terribly important plot point in the story, but it does come up.

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"You were gone for so long," Magus said to the girl, fingers entwined in her long, braided hair. "I thought you would never come back from your other world." He gave her a rare smile, which she returned.

"Wake up," she said.

Mildly confused, Magus unconsciously knit his brow. "Pardon?"

"Wake up, damn it!" she said again, her tone of voice not matching her face at all.

"I'm afraid I don't --"

"Honestly!" she continued. "Every single morning -- you'd think a wizard wouldn't be the kind of person to sleep in all the time. Come on, you've been sleeping ages longer than the rest of us!"

Magus blinked, and the girl his arms were around wasn't who she had been three seconds ago. Her long, coffee-colored braid was replaced by a purple bob, and her wire-rimmed glasses were now thick and clunky. "You!" was the last thing Magus said before --

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"Honestly! Every single morning -- you'd think a wizard wouldn't be the kind of person to sleep in all the time," said Lucca, rubbing her forehead. "Come on, you've been sleeping ages longer than the rest of us!" She yanked at his shoulder to turn him onto his back, and at that moment, he awoke with a yell.

The combined motive forces of Magus abruptly sitting up and Lucca's yank on his shoulder led him to tumble out of the air where he'd been hovering horizontally in his sleep, roll off the side of his bed, and land squarely atop Lucca on the floor. For a moment, time stopped -- then, Magus was forced to realize exactly where his lips were as Lucca's knee reflexively slammed itself in the most convenient place for it: his groin. Magus made a small, choked sound and rolled off of Lucca, who stood up angrily.

"What the hell was that?" Lucca shouted. "I... what..." she spat, unable to come up with proper words.

"What... happened to her?" said Magus cryptically through gritted teeth.

"What happened to who?" said Lucca, still wiping her mouth.

Magus collected himself and sat up, more slowly this time. "You know, the girl who..."

"The girl who what?" Lucca snapped.

Magus furrowed his brow, thinking. "Come to think of it, I have no idea either," he said, then muttered, "I can't believe all this happened over a stupid dream." Louder, he said, "You must be fully aware that this was your fault for startling me awake."

"My fault!" Lucca exclaimed. "How can you say that when you were on top of me not even half a minute ago? Besides, I wouldn't have had to come in here in the first place if you'd just wake up at a decent hour like the rest of us! Marle and I have eaten breakfast already! I'm just grateful she didn't see anything!"

Magus glared daggers at Lucca. "If she had, both of you would probably be dead."

"Wait, who would be dead if I saw someone on top of you half a minute ago?" There in the door stood Marle, drawn by the commotion.

"Speak of the devil," said Magus under his breath.

Lucca moaned.

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"Seriously?" asked Marle. "Magus has bad dreams?"

Lucca sighed. Probably even more than I do, she thought, but aloud, she said, "It would appear so." She had brought Marle aside to explain what had happened while Magus badgered the castle kitchen staff to cook something for him.

"Sucks that you had to have him fall on you," said Marle, making a face. "I'd have probably died if it was me instead of you. Or something."

Lucca sighed. Already the day was off to a positively awful start, and yesterday had been no picnic either -- particularly, she noted, the part that literally had been a picnic, since Marle's royal upbringing had never included cooking lessons. She'd had stomach cramps all day after eating what the princess had produced -- did wild parsnips even grow in Guardia Forest? -- and that had made the battle with Yakra's thirteenth-generation grandchild even less pleasant. Worse yet, after the single high point of Marle making up with her father, dinner had been something Lucca was allergic to, and everything else was at the other end of the overlong table. Lucca hated formal events anyway, mainly because her grease-stained vest was about the only thing in the world she ever thought comfortable. And then, the next morning, just when she thought everything was over... she shuddered. It had taken a full thirty minutes to explain to Marle exactly what had been going on.

The sounds of explosions emanated from the kitchen, jerking Lucca and Marle away from their conversation. Lucca swore. "Shouldn't have left him alone," she murmured. "Come on, Marle, we need to throw a blanket over this fire."

Marle nodded and followed Lucca to the kitchen, where a pair of mildly-singed chefs were putting out a fire on the stovetop and a third held a plate full of Magus's breakfast.

"Apparently, explosions are commonplace here," said Magus blandly as he took the plate. "Tell your father that his staff needs safer equipment," he told Marle with a sidelong look as he turned and walked from the kitchen to the dining room. Lucca and Marle watched, mouths agape at his utter calm.

"He's crazy," Marle concluded as soon as he'd turned the corner. "But he's right. Things blow up all the time in the kitchens."

"You too?" Lucca asked her. "I thought that only happened when my dad was trying a new recipe."