It had always been her dream to see history, of course she knew that'd wish would never come true, but she still wished for it. But then again, there was always time travel. It was hard to take in everything while chasing a terrorist though. She wondered, of everything, why time travel? Why Rittenhouse? Flynn knew a lot through the journal, but why target Rittenhouse in the past? Why not fight them in the present? She wondered if Flynn really was any better than Rittenhouse, he killed many people to get what he wanted. Wasn't that what Rittenhouse did? She was restless, going on mission after mission. It was slowly taking it's toll on her. Sometimes she felt too confused about everything, her mind numb. She wasn't much help to Rufus and Wyatt if she couldn't think clearly.
Flynn didn't seem like that bad of a person sometimes but just when she doesn't expect it, his personality changes, leaving her as confused as ever. He was the most complicated person she had ever met, she couldn't help but be drawn to him. It's like her knowledge of him is completely wrong, although she had once believed she had figured him out. She needs to let go of the fact that she slightly cared about him. He had killed many people, she wondered how it effected him. She needs to let go of the slightest feeling of pity for him. She had no right to care, no right to pity him. She sighed, staring up at the ceiling.
He knew she was stronger than him. He had no doubt. All he wanted to do was survive all this, he wanted to live to see his wife and daughter. Then he'd leave, forever. He wondered what Lucy would do after all this. He needed to let go but his mind went to wondering if she'd be willing to come with him. He wouldn't beg her to come, but she could if she wanted. He wanted to move on from all this. He meant it, he was already done with time travel. He wanted to be free, to leave everything behind, whether Lucy came with him or not. He had no idea what was next. He preferred it that way.
She remembered, that one dance. They danced closely, him guiding her through it. She remembered, the phone calls in the middle of the night. They called her to the Lifeboat, they kept her fighting. Their old arguments seemed like distant memories now. They worked together, most disputes forgotten. They both just wanted to survive all of this, they needed to defeat Rittenhouse. They were a team, they stuck together. They moved on, from mission to mission, they were careful not to make mistakes. Each mistake caused and argument but it was usually easily forgotten. All she had to do was look up into his green eyes and her mind went blank. There were way to many times when she stopped talking mid-sentence. They were free to do as they pleased, nobody extra to fight against them. It was just them against Rittenhouse.
He couldn't let her die, the thought made him feel a pang in his heart. A much as he'd like to be cold and careless, he honestly cared for her. He wouldn't forgive himself if something happened to her. He didn't miss the way she stopped talking when her eyes met his, he knew she felt the same way. His mind was constantly a jumble of thoughts, making him occasionally say things he usually wouldn't say, such as accidentally calling her beautiful. He usually just tried to act like he said it in a joking manner. He wasn't supposed to care for anyone but he just couldn't let her go. He used to think of only friendship but that changed when he noticed the way her eyes lit up when she talked to him. He wanted her, dear god, he NEEDED her.