"Time passes. Even when it seems impossible. Even when each tick of the second hand aches like the pulse of blood behind a bruise. It passes unevenly, in strange lurches and dragging lulls, but pass it does. Even for me."- New Moon,Stephenie Meyer

.

The clock marks another hour, but I don't care.

Miley stopped by this morning, brought me breakfast and said it was a nice day outside. I said thank you, told her I loved her,and went back to bed. She's worried, I geuss she should be.

So, I'm trying to fall into unconsciosness, drowning in my own misery.

I wish you were here.

And I know Miley and Oliver say it was for the best, we weren't good for eachother, but they don't know how we were.

They don't know how our loved worked.

You have your dreams, and I have my ambitions, but I can't get you out of my mind.

And I know I messed up, my mistake. But people make mistakes, and mistakes can be forgiven. So, just forgive me already.

I still remember how all this happened, I remember when we first met.

--

It's one of those rare nights on the beach, the ones I actually like. There's a breeze, and people are camped out all over.

Miley and I are walking off her deck, blankets and beer in tow, you and your brother come up and ask if we've got plans.

I say no quickly, Miley's staring at the one with curly hair.

"Wanna hang with us?" You ask, staring at me, fire in your eyes.

"Yeah."

We follow you out to your bonfire. There's a girl with strawberry blonde hair and another boy,who resembles you.

"I'm Joe, this is Kevin and Madison." you gesture to them, "and that's Nick." You point to the one whose making eyes at Miley.

I smirk at the two.

"Oh yeah." I whisper to Miley, and she giggles.

I look at you again, your still staring. I hold up the cooler, and you take it from me, getting two beers out.

"Come on." You say, leading me to two chairs farther out of the group.

We sit down, and you hand me one of the cans.

"What's your name?" You ask, opening yours.

"Lilly."

"Nice to meet you Lilly." You say.

I take a drink, and smile.

The night goes on and we get drunk. We don't talk much, we just stare at eachother.

Madison turns on a radio, you hold out a hand and we dance. Miley and Nick get up to go for a walk.

"I think my friend likes your brother." I say as you spin me.

"Oh yeah?"

I nod in their direction.

"Well, I think you like me."

"Is that so?" I ask playfully.

"Mhmm." You say smiling.

"I think you're right."

We stop dancing and you kiss me, I love it. I breathe you in and we can't stop. Kevins yells and says he and Madison are going back to the house, you wave your hand at him and turn your attention back to me.

You spin me again, we stumble from intoxication, and fall in a heap onto the ground.

We laugh loudly as you wrap your arms around me, pulling me in for another kiss.

"Lillian?"

"Yes?" I giggle.

"I think I love you."

I laugh.

"Wow, Joseph, you love me on the first date? I must be extremely charming or really sexy."

"You have no idea." You whisper.

--

I grab my bottle of Jack Daniel's from underneath the bed.

It helps me get through the day, helps wash down the regret.

I take a big swig, and wince as it hits my throat.

I know I should be living my life, instead of laying here hating everything.

But, I miss you.

Every breath is heavier, and each step is harder to take..

--

I want to call you, so bad. I want to dial the numbers. I want to cry, and break into sobs, while you say all the right things.

I want to show up at your door, and beg you to forgive me. I want to kiss you, and feel your breath in my ear. I want to whisper how much I've missed you, and I want you to hug me close and tell me to never leave you again.

I want to go out onto the beach with you, like we did that first night, and I want you to dance with me again. I want to see your beautiful face smiling, and hear your singsong voice laughing.

I want to lay out on the deck of your beach house, my head on your chest. I want your level breathing to lull me to sleep.

I want to fix all my mistakes. I want you.

Author Note;

LOE.

I want to continue this, so... give me 5 reviews, and I will post chapter two.

It might take a while though, school has started,boo : (

And burn is coming to a close.

I just started sparkle.

Read Those, reviews are good.

ilovereaders