For The D/G Forum 'Challenge Tag' Thread
Prompt:
Challenge #7
Must include: Draco telling a knock-knock joke.
Enjoy! :D
And review ;D
Tacky Pureblood Humour
"Don't get all indignant because my humor is too advanced for yours." Draco stopped walking and crossed his arms and looked away indignantly, a pout tugging at his lower lip.
Ginny rolled her eyes. "Draco, for the last time, it's not funny. Telling the joke over and over, will not suddenly make it funny. Nor will explaining it to me in detail. In fact, I find it rude, immature and offensive. Add that to the fact that you like to 'use your wand for effect', and it pretty much evolves into disaster territory. Now, can we please keep walking? We're blocking the path for other people."
He didn't move from his spot in front of Madam Malkin's shop. "But you love muggles," Draco whined at her, "how come you don't like their jokes? Personally I usually find their humor rather crude. Honestly, they need to learn that when someone knocks on your door you command them to 'enter', you don't ask who's there." He fell silent as an undoubtably negative train of thought ran through his head.
"Oh Merlin, Draco, if you go around actually saying that joke to people someone is going to punch your lights out." Draco's lack of response indicated he was too caught up in his thought process. Ginny snapped her fingers in front of his face. "Could you please listen to me? If you tell that joke to people someone will try to break that pretty little face of yours. And we wouldn't want that, would we?"
Draco's eyes began to squint strangely and his lower lip pouted even further as he batted his lashes. "You're so mean to me, Ginevra. All I try to do is make you laugh and you don't even try to understand or appreciate the effort I go to for you. Besides, who's going to be upset by it?"
"Okay, whatever Draco. Tell your joke, just stop making that stupid face at me."
Draco's face broke out into a smile. "Really?"
"Really. Go ahead."
Draco's expression turned serious and he took a deep breath. "Okay, okay," He paused for a moment before half smiling then taking a few more deep breaths and turning solemn. "Knock, knock."
"Enter!" Ginny cried, then giggled at his depressing expression.
"Ginny! Stop that! Do it properly." He began to pout and squint weirdly again.
"Sorry honey. Who's there?"
"You know."
"You know, who?"
Draco whipped out his wand with a flourish and yelled "AVADA KEDAVRA!" before breaking out in laughter.
Ginny rolled her eyes again, then looked at her boyfriend as he laughed at his joke. She couldn't help smiling at the way his eyes crinkled and his pearly white teeth glinted at her.
"See! You do find it funny!" Draco accused her when he saw her smile.
"Oi! What did you just say!" A deep voice yelled from the doorway to Madam Malkin's, and Draco turned to stare up at a great lug of a man who seemed unable to stop his hands from clenching and unclenching.
"It's a knock-knock joke," He told the man snootily. "You know, that ridiculous muggle humor. And how about you learn to mind your own business."
The man glared daggers at Draco. "I'll mind my own business when you learn some respect."
"Yeah, well-" Draco was grabbed from behind and pulled back a little.
"I'm sorry sir, my boyfriend is a little funny in the head. I really should just stop taking him out on day trips from St Mungo's, but he just looks so sorry for himself since he was tortured in the war. It's left some permanent damage on his mind, and I just don't know what to do anymore." She clutched at Draco's arm and began to sob, shoulders slumped and lashes lowered as her lip trembled.
Draco began to sputter indignantly, so she stomped on his foot, then gazed up at him with adoration as tears began to drop from her lashes pathetically.
The man seemed at a loss as to what to say.
"Miss... I apologise. I didn't realise." He paused and glanced at Draco with pity. "It's a heavy burden you bare for one so young."
Ginny nodded, as more tears dampened her cheeks. "It is hard, but I'll stay with him for as long as he needs me. Though I've lost hope that his condition will improve."
Draco's jaw dropped and he stood there in stunned silence.
"I know it's not much miss... but you might be able to help him more." He handed her a card. "He looks as though he needs this, badly."
Ginny glanced down at the address for the 'Wizarding Psychotic Health Clinic' and had to disguise her laughter with a choked sob. "Thank you, so much. I really appreciate this." She hung her head solemnly. Draco continued to stare in open-mouthed shock. She twined her hand through his. "Come on, darling, it's time for your next treatment. Now thank this lovely gentleman for his help and understanding and we'll be on our way." Draco continued to stare blankly.
Ginny leaned towards the man, whispering "Sorry... he just really isn't 'all there', if you know what I mean."
The man nodded understandingly. "Please, just go. Don't be late for the treatment, he seems to need it."
Ginny offered a smile before pulling Draco down the street.
As soon as they were away from the man he turned to Ginny, fury oozing off him. "A little funny in the head?" He yelled.
Again, Ginny rolled her eyes. "And that's what you get for telling stupid jokes. Now move it before he realises you're not insane, you're just a snobby prick."