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I had died with a smile on my face.

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I had lost every single one of my family members to some type of war or battle. Dan and Nawaki were all I had left and then… I had lost them too. Jiraiya tried to keep my spirits up – telling me that I still had family in him, Orochimaru and Sensei.

And I… didn't want to hurt his feelings. The war had been taking just as much from him as it had from me. So… I put on my best smile and nodded.

I couldn't tell him…

Not after one of his students had been delivered back to him from Iwa in a box – mangled and burned beyond all recognition.

...that my feelings for him didn't equate to how I feel – felt – about Dan and Nawaki. And… that they never would.

Jiraiya, Orochimaru and Sensei were important to me – they were my comrades in battle and that meant much more than combination of kanji could explain.

But… Dan and Nawaki were different.

As strong and as intelligent as Dan was… every single time Dan was on the battle field, I could never calm my paranoia. Where was he at? Who was he facing? Did he have any injuries? Did he have a defense against advance earth jutsu? What if he needs me and I'm not there? What if… what if…

And Dan is – was – just as powerful as Jiraiya and Orochimaru. There was no reason to believe he would die before them – not when those two had been sent to the front lines far more often than Dan.

But to me, the stakes weren't the same.

And I was no fool when it came to my luck – or curse of luck.

Jiraiya and Orochimaru were my genin teammates, comrades, and lifelong friends. Sensei was my teacher after losing my grandfather and granduncle – not to mention my Hokage. They were important to me.

But they weren't my reason for breathing; my reason for getting up in the morning and smiling; my reason for gritting my teeth as metal cut my skin, fire burned my flesh, and chakra shattered my bones; they weren't the reason I shoved aside the emotional pain of taking another life, when I had made a promise to heal, not kill.

Dan and Nawaki were.

They were my sun, my air, and my happiness.

And then they were gone.

Gone.

I entered the Rain Country with nothing left to lose. I knew the stakes – the entire war would be watching this battle. If the Leaf defeated the Rain County's leader, Hanzo, then Konoha would hold a strategical advantage over Iwa. Iwa would be forced into a corner and because this war was started so closely following the end of the First Great Ninja War, Iwa would not have the resources available to do more than defend their lands. Konoha was equally as devastated and as such, would not pursue Iwa into the Earth Country, but the Leaf would still hold a strategic advantage over Iwa if they ever decided to push forward again.

I couldn't protect the lives of the people I cared for most…

…but I could finish what they started. I could protect the village from this war.

I didn't just know it was going to cost me my life.

I bet on it.

.

It was probably the first time in my life I had won that bet.

.

Jiraiya was mad. I remember him screaming at me as the rain poured around us – telling me to heal myself, to get up, that everything would be ok…

I turned my head to Orochimaru instead. I knew he would know what I was asking for.

"You did it. You killed Hanzo. The rest of his forces have been killed or captured. Konoha has won Ame."

I knew he was angry at me too – Orochimaru just showed it in different ways.

I was sure, when Sensei arrived, he would be mad at me too.

.

I smiled anyways.

I had fulfilled my brother's and lover's wills and now…

I would get to join them.

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"Kirakira hikaru~" A child's voice sang softly, "Osora no hoshi yo~"

"Uggg…" Tsunade thought to herself as her brain slowly woke up, "What the hell kind of meds did they put me on?!" Tsunade groaned in her head again, "It feels like a picked a fight with a mountain and lost."

"Mabataki shite wa~" The voice continued in a light, melodic tone, "Minna wo miteru~"

Tsunade groaned again, "And what with the singing?!" Tsunade quickly cursed her teammate in her head, "Tch! I bet this is Jiraiya's way of getting back and me for trying to commit battlefield suicide…"

""Kirakira hikaru~" The child continued followed by a quick giggle.

The expert medic groaned in her head for the third time, "I endure broken bones, ripped flesh, multiple concussions, and the blood curdling sensation of being drenched in poison… all for the sake of Konoha…"

"Osora no hoshi yo…" The small voice fades off – signaling the end of the song.

"And they can't even let me die in peace…" Tsunade thought as she let out a small sigh.

"Ah! You're so cute Tsu-chan!" The child's voice squeals out softly – as if he is trying not to wake Tsunade up.

"Excuse me?" Tsunade thought with a scowl as she begrudgingly started opening her eyes.

"Oh no!" The boy cried suddenly, "Shh, shh Tsu-chan! Go back to sleep! Big brother is sorry he woke you!"

Tsunade blinking rapidly in order for her vision to clear as things started to quickly go downhill, "Big brother? Who the hell does this kid think he is?!"

Large black eyes opened wide and focused on the surroundings around her. It was dark – nighttime clearly – but the moon was full and was shining brightly into the room. It was a simple residential bedroom – nothing like the hospital room Tsunade was picturing in her head. Possibly even more concerning than where she was, was how big everything seemed to be. She was in a bed – or rather… next to a bed.

Tsunade felt a cold shiver run down her back when she realized what she was on. She in a baby cot, rolled up next to a twin sized bed.

And on that bed, lying on his side and staring at her, was a dark haired boy with large, sparkling onyx eyes and an even larger, brighter smile on his face.

"Kirakira hikaru~" The boy began singing softly again, "Osora no hoshi yo~"

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"Damn you Lady Luck!"

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Tsunade screamed all night long in protest.