Chapter 1 - Pork

"Why does my bum hurt, Lewis?" Honeydew, the dwarf of Khaz Modan said, breaking the silence after they had got up out of the two single beds they were forced to share due to being in adventure mode and being unable to destroy and move one of the single beds away from the other.
"I think I may have kept my sword in my pocket overnight," Xephos, the spaceman promptly replied, not wanting this to go any further.
However, the dwarf continued: "So that's what was poking me, okay."
"Yeah."
"Your sword."
"Uh huh"
"Your pork sword."
"Oh god no. What the hell. No," Xephos muttered before walking away from his friend, the book of innuendos.

It was a pretty standard boss fight in an adventure map; hit the 'weak spots' of the statue and make it blow up.
Not forgetting the seemingly endless waves of mobs coming at you, of course.
Suddenly, Xephos' only sword broke. "Uh... Friend? Do you have a spare sword?" He asked. "Nope, sorry, mate," was the reply he received.
"Use ya' pork sword."
Xephos stuttered "W-what!?"
"You heard me," Honeydew giggled.
"No. Don't be stupid."
Xephos decided to beat the monsters with his fists. They fought in silence for a few moments. Because of Xephos only having his fists to fight with, he was quickly backed into a corner with stone and a small window behind him. The spaceman contemplated jumping through, but the inside looked dark, probably housing even more monsters than out here.

Firefly, Xephos' evil double, saw the spaceman backed into a corner through the window of his home, just behind Xephos. He flung open the window and pulled his double into the building, gagging him. Xephos' doppelganger tied him to a wooden chair after taking both his and the spaceman's shirt off, switching them so he would appear to be Xephos.

Firefly was originally planning on pretending to be Xephos and capturing Honeydew. But having Xephos here was too tempting. Slowly taking off both of their clothes, he made plans for the spaceman. First, he was going to seduce him, and then he wanted to fuck him. Hard. Finally, he'll make him talk. Then he'll go out there and capture his Dwarf friend.

"No! Stop! What are you doing!?" Xephos had been screaming like this for ages. The pyro would have gagged him already if he didn't kiss so well. He continued thrusting into the spaceman's anus, looking for his sweet spot "NNGGGH!"
"Gotcha!"
After a few choice thrusts, Xephos came, tensing his body; causing the evil version to come as well. "Now talk," He panted.
"A-about what?"
"Honeydew. What does he like? What does he want?"
Xephos tiredly revealed how Honeydew seemed eager for him to use his 'pork sword.'
This was all Firefly needed. "Good, now, sleep," he whispered as he kissed the spaceman one last time.

"POOOOORK SWORD!"
Honeydew's head snapped up at the sound of his friend shouting, to see him with his trousers down and his erect penis in his hand. The zombies shared the dwarf's shocked expression. Some ran, some forced themselves to despawn and the few that were left were hit by his penis repeatedly until they left.
Slowly, though, zombies started reappearing; seeming to form a line. As the first zombie bent over to close its lips around the 'sword' Honeydew tackled it and pushed his way to the front of the queue, blushing. Firefly quickly understood the dwarf's feelings towards the spaceman and pulled down Honeydew's trousers, whispering in his ear as he did so. "Prepare your ass, Dwarf."

Honeydew was shocked at how forward his friend was being lately. But that thought was quickly dismissed as he felt a warm, hard rod inserted in his anus. He writhed in the sudden pain but it subsided. All Honeydew could feel was intense pleasure as he was thrusted into.

Firefly slowly slid down the wall as he thrusted, so he was in a sitting position. He spun the dwarf around and immediately caught him in a suffocating kiss. He pumped the dwarf's erect penis until they were both at the edge. With one last thrust, Honeydew's sperm went on to his chest and Firefly's seed filled Honeydew up to the brim. Relaxing in his best friend's arm, Honeydew whispered "Xeph'... I love you."
"I know."
Firefly felt a little guilty at the upcoming complications of Honeydew remembering this night and Xephos, the real Xephos not.

"I... Uh... I will be right back," he muttered as he got up to head back through the window.
He clambered through and immediately took off Xephos' shirt and put his own back on. He unbound Xephos and pulled his shirt over the other man's head.

"Xeph'! There you are!" Honeydew shouted as he saw his friend climbing out of the window.
Honeydew ran to the spaceman and pulled him into a hug, leaving Xephos confused. The younger man has always had feelings for the dwarf, but had kept them hidden; but now, in the heat of the moment, he lifted his friend into his arms. Shifting him over so he sat on his hip, Xephos looked at the shorter man. "H-honeydew?" He questioned.
"Yes?"
"I l-love you," He muttered, his face turning red.
"I know. I love you too."