Chapter 1
" What do you dream about?" He asks softly into the wind. I look at him annoyed, but see this desperation in his eyes. Something is begging me to say I even have one...Like he wants to know what it's like. But there is no silver lining in my world, no dream for myself that is feasible in this moment in time. So I pause in opening my mouth because honestly I think what I would say normally is the last thing he needs to hear, so I say the one thing I have never told a soul.
" I dream about being someone" I say quietly, which is strange for me. It sounds as if I am a child, and he cocks one eyebrow on that pretty face of his.
" What do you mean?" And I realize he was confused about what I said and not how. Yet sadly I thought he may understand what I meant from the glimpses I've seen. I suppose I was wrong in taking that leap of faith because what does Finnick Odair know about wanting for anything, when he has everything. I turn my head away so he cannot see my disappointment.
" If you have to ask, then you'll never know" I reply, turning from the city lights that burn my eyes and to the dimmer elevator. He spins then, looking surprised that I would just leave when I see him from the closing doors. But there is also something else there in those depths; a deep hurt that I seem to have caused inside him. But I stand by my words, because if he has to ask what it means then he will never fully grasp my dream. A dream I plan on making a reality in these Games...for my siblings.
The dawn, a pink sky with all the blues that grace the day subdued, is what signals me to the hour at the docks. It means that my shift has been going on for almost two hours now, the sky alight fully by 6:30 in the morning. I have to leave for school soon, and to help ready my younger siblings for the day. The two youngest cannot be trusted to eat and get to school on time on their own, and my sister or mother are...not qualified to care for them on their own. I'm sure Adam did not return last night either, and that means the responsibility falls upon my shoulders.
A strong gust of wind blows brown tendrils into my face, distracting me from the sky and pulling me from my thoughts. Now I look around quickly, swiveling my head to be sure the bustling dock workers have not noticed my distraction since they love to poke fun at me when they can. I refuse to let that happen when I can help it, even though my fellow workers make me smile. A small vessel comes into my line of sight, a bit rickety but always dependable. Three young men about seventeen in their fishing gear wave with long, strong arms at me. I roll my eyes at the sight of them.
"Ann! We'll be shoving of, I plan on seeing you at the bar tonight for our little celebration!" I hear Hector, one of my many friends from the docks call from the deck of his boat. Ben and Jack yell too, making sure I'll be done with everything for our yearly get together...before the reaping. Of course I'm not going to skip.
" You've got it gentlemen! I'll be sure to drag your sorry asses home after you drink each other under the table" I yell back and I can hear their laughter echo on the waves and see the ship play with the horizon. Tomorrow after the reaping I'll be going out to sea with them, to dive for oysters and upkeep my namesake here on the docks. I sigh deeply in regret and wish that the salt was wetting my skin now as it is theirs. But today I need to pack up early and get to the house so I can take my tests. No use in skipping for a trip I already missed out on.
" I'm off to classes Mr. Wheaton!" I call into the building to my right and I set a finished net on the pile of twenty I made this morning. He sticks a graying head out the door and smiles brightly. He is such a kind man, pushing 43 now and still missing his kids who died in the games. One dead to the 61st, and one dead in the 65th. I smile because I know that is why he's been holed up in there all morning, and this seems to put the old spark back in his eyes.
" Those boys leave without you then there Ann? Not one of the guys when you go to school?" He chuckles, walking out to block the sun with his height. I scoff at his words and tilt my chin up.
" We both know I'm more of a man than any of them my friend. It's just that I'm also an educated one" I laugh while picking up the remnants of breakfast, which were some fish bones not yet picked clean from dinner the night before, and pull up my loose trousers. He smiles warmly, a flicker of sadness in his eyes when he looks at my meal. I hide it behind my back nonchalantly so he doesn't feel the need to pay me extra tomorrow after the haul. I see in his eyes that he got the message for now.
" Well Ann you should be heading off, but I expect to see you at the bar tonight. It's a tradition and all of you kids are like one of my own. I want to see you safe after the reaping and a little wishful thinking never hurt anyone beforehand." He quietly says, patting my back and I feel warm on the inside. My father never told any of us things like that and it makes my throat tight. I clear it and hold my head high to show I am stronger than that.
He grins like he sees right through me.
" I'll be there to beat all your boys tonight not to worry Mr. Wheaton." I tell him, throwing the tattered brown sack of belongings over my shoulder and taking to the sandy hill. I hear him call a goodbye and I half wave behind me, taking to the sand road and off to the ...poor side of my village. In the distance when I glance behind I see the Victor's mansions on the Wharf, sparkling and untouchable like the sun. I wish I could be walking that way, but I'm no Victor by any stretch of the means.
So I turn back around then, looking out to the coast where the waves lap at the beach and I smile wide. If only I had time to swim in the salty waters of my home today, but that is for tomorrow after the reaping if I make it that far. At seventeen I had way to many slips in the bowl, on for me each year and one for my four siblings since I turned twelve. The thought makes a pit open in my stomach for a moment before I swallow the pointless fear. There is no honor in being a coward and one thing I am not is a fucking coward. The wind lightly taps me as if in agreement, the soft call of gulls calming the swirling doubt curdling my insides.
"Help!" Someone screams from the beach ahead, and I see a woman waving what looks to be a stick at a group of career boys howling with laughter. A fire ignites in my stomach and my vision turns red in thought of my father when I pick up a stick of my own and run at the scene. I run faster than I ever have in my life, swift like the shark on its prey and equally as stupid. When I make contact with the first of four grown careers they break the circle around the woman on the ground. Unfortunately though the circle is now poised around me and the shortest has me by five inches.
" Get out of here Cresta! Mind your damn business!" A boy I recognize from my class says when he swings his meaty fist. I duck out of practice from Dad swinging and take him down with a clean swipe to the knee like Ben taught me all those years ago. The others I don't recognize grunt in anger when I kick his face and he falls unconscious at my feet. The boy I had hit first picks me up under my arms, but my head in his face makes him drop me and blindly hit one of his buddies to the ground instead of crushing my skull. That is two down, one injured, and a kick to his shins and a swing of my stick has him grounded. I round on my last enemy, crouching into a fighting position I have seen Hector use in the bar.
"Well? Come and get me!" I yell at the last and biggest guy, hulking over me by what looks like two feet. He sneers and charges, so I dance out of the way like I saw my mother do so many times when Dad comes home drunk. He plows into the sand and screams in rage, ripping my weapon from my hand and holding me up from my collar so I am above eye level. His fist is raised to strike and I glare defiantly when he falls and drops me from a shot to the back. I land in the sand on my feet like a cat, ready to strike out of nature. The woman, short and gray haired, stands with her polished walking stick bared up and a wicked smile on her face. I balk at the old woman. One look and I know who this is; this is Mags the Victor, from the 15th Games. I stare wide eyed at the woman I just blindly ran to save.
"Thank you." She garbles, eyes softened and as blue as the ocean depths. Before I can respond Peacekeepers have descended on the scene and I am interrupted by Head Peacekeeper Gearson who wants to know what has happened here. In moments other Peacekeepers are picking up the boys we fought, and old Mags is explaining to huge Gearson why I'm all scuffed up and bruised. He changes his polite tone to one of condescendence when he finally turns on me.
"You just stay out of trouble Cresta. I already had to drag your father and brother home this morning." He says in a cold tone that turns my blood to ice. The threat is clear so I nod and look down in shame for my family, Mags' sad eyes looking into my own because of our height. Compared to her I look even longer than usual, all willowy next to her strong figure. I hide behind my bangs until I know the Peacekeepers are gone and away. I am so embarrassed this amazing person had to hear about their...escapades.
" Thank you for vouching for me earlier. I owe you one ." I tell the old woman, looking up so she can see my sincerity. Her wrinkled eyes crinkle to reveal dimples on her cheeks and I smile back. She had to have been beautiful when she was younger.
" I'm glad you weren't too busy to help an old woman Miss Cresta. Three people walked past before you. I am still in your debt." she mumbles, and I strain slightly to listen and hear every word. Either way the point is clear...and so is the time. Shit. I'm late!
" Oh sh...man I-I'm sorry. I need to get home to my siblings. We have school!" I say, picking up my stuff from the road as she calls her goodbyes after my retreating form. I don't yell back now, instead I run and hope to tell her tomorrow how sorry I am for running off. I just hope Dad and Adam are asleep and not roaming about looking for a reason to be nasty. I have enough bruises as it is for goodness sake. Plus I'm not sure I can take any more excitement today. There is just too much to do for that.
The shanty we inhabit is in my sight while the sea passes in a blur, brother and sister waiting with tiny back packs outside the door with Amelia. The peeling paint is still not a welcome sight, especially when I can see that my older sister is angry to have had to take care of them, and mother looks unhappy as well. I hate my life.
" Where have you been! School is more important than your dock friends!" Amelia scolds as I skid to a stop. Her eyes widen at my stretched shirt and cuts, but I don't give either of them time to fret before I grab Amy and Arnav's hands and take off for the square. I yell back to them that I'll explain later and hope any studying I could have done before I helped Mags will not matter on these stupid tests. But my luck is shit, so I'm sure A is not going to stand for Annie Cresta. That's just how my life works.