Author:Hyyp chick
Pairing:Obi/Ani
Rating:PG
Disclaimer:Not mine. Never mine.
I can't remember when my feelings for him changed, only that one day I realised they had. He was still my Padawan and I tried to bury my emotions deep within me to complete his training.
Now, he is a Knight, and I'm still not sure I have done my best by him. I think my feelings for him have clouded my judgement.
I think I have failed him.
We have just spent the last five months together, fighting alongside each other, and every day became more and more difficult for me. He is more to me than an attraction, or distraction. He is my love.
And I love him.
And I must tell him lest it eat away at my soul for eternity. I am nervous, but I sense in him something more for me too. Maybe it's not love but maybe it's enough. When I woke in that elevator shaft tossed over his shoulder I felt it, the fear of losing me coursing through his veins.
He is on his way and I will tell him. Tonight.
I have cooked for us. It will be the first proper meal we have had in months. It is his favourite, and I have dessert. I am in the kitchen when he enters the apartment and I hear him kick his boots off before he comes to find me. I turn to see him shuffle into my kitchen and he drops into a seat at the table. He is tired and I think maybe he has been crying, but it is understandable. He killed a Sith Lord today. Anakin finds it difficult to control his emotions.
He comments that dinner smells good and I beam and swell with pride.
I did it for him.
He disappears for a shower and as I listen to the rush of water I wish longingly to caress his skin and wash away his aches and pains. I can make all of it better.
When I tell him.
He is dressed in a fresh set of robes when he returns to eat. We are silent and there is something in the air between us.
Anticipation.
I think he is waiting for me to tell him. I think he knows. I am suddenly emboldened and confident and I open my mouth to speak the words but Anakin beats me to it.
"Master, I have something I must tell you. I cannot keep it hidden from you any longer"
He says, and I encourage him to continue, ready to rush into his arms and tell him I love him too.
"Padme. She is my wife. We are married"
He confesses, looking straight into my eyes. I'm not sure how to react; I end up not saying anything at all. I just stare, horrified and confused. He turns away from me and now I know he is crying.
"She is pregnant with my child"
He tearfully continues, and I know I should say something but all I can do is listen to my own heartbeat and the sound of my world crashing down around me.
And then he is gone, without touching dessert.
And I wonder; If I had told him, would I still have lost him?