This is a poem I wrote around December. I was going through a really rough time and I resorted to self harm. Even though it says I used a knife in the poem, I didn't, instead I used an eraser. I still have scars on my arms that remind me of the burns I did, and I feel extremely guilty about it. Every time I see them, I remember the anguish I put my friends through.
The reason I put this poem up is because I think this sort of what Bella felt during the months she was dead inside. While she didn't resort to self harm like I did, the feelings were very much the same.
Myself
Searching
Searching for the light in me
Searching for the fight in me
Missing
Missing my life, It ran away
Missing the knife, It told me I was still alive
Searching for myself
missing myself
Where am I
Did I just disappear
My life is gone
No More
I have quit Searching for
I have quit Missing
Myself