Hi and thanks for hitting on this post! 24 ended years ago, but I'm still obsessed with one of my favorite characters, Bill Buchanan. So obsessed, in fact, that I came out of writing retirement to write this story. I wrote it to satisfy my own curiosity about Karen Hayes in season 7. Bill's wedding ring is clearly shown in more than one scene. In fact, it was so obvious that I suspected that it was focused on during the filming as if the writers/producers/directors wanted you to know that Bill was still married to Karen. What bothered me was that no one ever mentioned Karen. President Taylor made the comment that she wanted to personally call the families of everyone killed at the White House, thus, she would have to call Karen. That made me start wondering about Karen's reaction. Those musings evolved into this story.

Disclaimer: Any character that appears on the show belongs to Fox. All others are mine.

Chapter 1: Realization

It was almost 2:30 in the morning when Karen woke with a start from a sound sleep. She sat bolt upright in bed not sure what it was that had awoken her.

"Bill?" she called out. "Bill, are you there?" she said a little louder this time.

It was then that she heard the rumble of thunder through her open bedroom window. Karen heaved a heavy sigh and pressed her hand to her chest as if that would calm her racing heart. She pushed back the bed clothes and got out of bed to shut the window. As she reached the window, a strong gust of cold wind blew in off of the Mediterranean Sea. She shivered involuntarily. The wind was uncharacteristically cold for this time of year in the Mediterranean. It had been a warm day in southern Spain; she had spent much of the morning on the beach outside of the villa. At least until the reports started coming in from American news agencies chronicling the terrorist attack in Washington DC. After that she couldn't pull herself away from the news. She watched the coverage of the midair plane crash and wondered for the thousandth time in the past three months how to get in touch with Bill. She had wanted to go to Washington with him. She wanted to be part of the operation that he and Chloe and Tony were involved in. Like they had in the past, Karen wanted to work side by side with Bill to bring down a terrorist threat. But Bill wouldn't agree to it. Things were different this time. They had other responsibilities; they had new priorities and she needed to stay behind.

That was fine at first. Karen stayed in Vermont while Bill moved to Washington. They talked several times a day. Sometimes they called just to chat and to hear one another's voice. Other times Bill called to ask Karen's advice on the operation. Bill was even able to get home every couple of weeks so that they could spend time together. But that ended a little over two months ago. It was then that Bill came home from Washington unexpectedly and with a new sense of urgency. Without providing details, Bill explained that the situation had become dangerous and that he feared for her safety. He was afraid that she could be used as a pawn if the terrorists were able to connect him with the rogue operation. With that, Bill called on friends in Interpol and arranged for a move to the secure location. No one outside of Interpol knew the location. Not family or friends. Not even Bill himself. He insisted on that. If he were captured and interrogated, he couldn't reveal a location that he didn't know.

Again, thunder rumbled in the distance and another gust of cold wind filled Karen's window. At the same moment, she felt the presence of someone behind her.

"Bill!" she said as she spun around fully expecting his form to be filling the doorway. But the room was empty. Bill wasn't there. She was alone. It was then that Karen knew. She didn't know how she knew, but she knew. Bill wasn't there and he wasn't coming back. Ever.

Karen staggered back a few steps and steadied herself against the wall. She felt as if she was choking, unable to get her breath. She wanted to scream but suppressed it not wanting to wake anyone else in the house. Tears streamed silently down her face and a sob rose in her throat. She pushed herself forward to the French doors that led to the balcony. Barefoot, she stepped onto the balcony overlooking the Mediterranean. Thunder continued to rumble, but the cold air she had sensed earlier through the open window was gone. A warm, stormy breeze filled the air. Karen let herself sink down slowly into a chair and allowed herself to cry inconsolably, lamenting what she knew someone would confirm later, her husband's death. She was strangely aware of the warm sea air and the rhythmic splash of the surf. She could taste the faint flavor of salt on her lips. She stared into the dark night lit only by an occasional streak of lightening that reflected on the choppy water and remembered her five years, five wonderful years, with Bill.

It all started so badly. Karen still cringed when she remembered how she had treated Bill and everyone else at CTU that day. Who would have ever thought that they would be so happy together? She came to CTU in the middle of a terrorist attack to take over and to roll his agency into Homeland Security. Within hours she was breaking rules to help him for reasons that even she couldn't explain. It would have been so easy to take over CTU and take all of the credit for what Bill and his staff had done, but Karen Hayes, considered a ruthlessly professional ladder climber by most, found that she couldn't do that to Bill Buchanan. She couldn't look into those sincere crystal blue eyes and do anything that would hurt him.

When he asked her to breakfast the next morning, it took every bit of self control not to throw herself at his feet and scream "Yes!" Instead, she boldly asked for a rain check, which she cashed in less than a week later. She used a breakfast meeting as an excuse, but it was just that, an excuse. She wanted to see Bill again and she could tell by his demeanor that morning that he wanted to see her again, too.

And so it began. For the first few weeks they both played it cool. A dinner here, a movie there, then came the trip to see the new exhibit at the art museum. It was there that they first held hands. Next came the steel drum band concert at the beach. It was that evening that they finally kissed. Slowly, the dates became more than just companionable. A dinner date would end at one of their homes with a night cap or two and a couple of hours of long slow kisses. Hands became more daring as time passed until the inevitable happened one Sunday afternoon when the doubles tennis date that they had with another couple was rained out. Try as she might, Karen really couldn't remember exactly how it was that the two always controlled, buttoned down department heads ended up so out of control and so unbuttoned, but they did and it was wonderful. The memories swirled happily in Karen's brain pushing away her earlier fears that Bill might not be coming back to make more memories with her; convincing her that her fears had been unfounded. She relaxed and watched the storm and allowed her breathing to return to normal.

"Senora Buchanan."

The voice startled her and it took Karen a moment to realize that it was the Interpol agent stationed at the villa that night.

"Senora, are you alright?" Agent Hernandez asked.

"I'm… I'm fine," Karen stammered. "The storm woke me," she explained not willing to tell the agent her real fear.

"I have a phone call for you," he paused. "From the United States," Hernandez finished the sentence as he handed her a portable phone.

"Thank you," Karen whispered as she reached for the phone.

Agent Hernandez nodded and retreated from the balcony. Karen stared at the phone for a long moment before answering. "Hello," she said tentatively.

"Mrs. Buchanan, please hold for the President of the United States," the voice said unemotionally.

The few seconds that she waited were interminable.

"Karen, this is Allison Taylor," said the president in a warm, motherly voice.

"Yes, Madam President," Karen responded automatically.

"Karen, you've known me as Allison for the last thirty years. There's no need to be so formal." Karen first met Allison Taylor when she was a congressional page in college. Taylor was several years her senior and working as a staffer in her father's congressional office. They had gotten along well despite differing political ideology and had maintained contact ever since. As National Security Advisor, Karen had worked closely with Taylor who was the ranking member of the Foreign Affairs Committee.

"Of course, Allison," Karen said almost robotically. "Forgive me for being so abrupt, but I have to believe that you have more to do tonight than make social calls."

"You're right," the president returned. "I wish this were a social call, but it isn't. I met your wonderful husband today, Karen. I'm sorry that I'd never met him before, because I'm sure we could have been friends." The president paused for a long moment. "He saved my life this evening, Karen. He saved my life and my daughter's life and he saved the lives of countless other people. I'll be eternally grateful to Bill for his bravery. Unfortunately, in saving my life, he lost his own. I'm so sorry, Karen."

Karen couldn't speak but began to sob openly.

"I wish there was something that I could say or do to take away the pain," Allison Taylor continued after giving Karen a few moments. "I hope that you find some consolation in knowing that Bill didn't die in vain. His actions allowed Secret Service and the FBI to retake the White House. All of the terrorists were either killed or captured. Our country is safer tonight because of the sacrifice that Bill made."

"Thank you," Karen said when she regained enough composure to speak. "I appreciate you calling me, Allison."

She fell silent again; her brain unable to process. She knew there were questions she should ask but she couldn't think of them. All she could think was that Bill died a hero, like the good public servant he had been for so many years would have wanted. Her brain function seemed to return again and the questions flooded her tongue. "How did it happen? How did he die? Was he alone? Where is his body? Are you sure? Are you sure that they made a positive ID?"

The President briefly outlined the events of the evening careful to leave out any secure information. "He died instantly. He wasn't in any pain. Jack was the first to get to him but he was already gone," Allison told her quietly.

"How did you track me down?" Karen asked. "Not many people know where I am."

"Bill carried a coded phone number in his wallet that Secret Service immediately recognized as belonging to Interpol. We had our intelligence sources follow that lead. He had you well hidden which tells me just how very much he loved you. He was obviously very concerned for your safety." The president paused and Karen could hear an aide speaking to her in the background. "I wish I could talk longer, Karen, but I have to go. Please accept Henry's and my deepest condolences to you and to the rest of Bill's family. If there is anything we can do, let us know. Please let my staff know when and where you plan to memorialize Bill because I'd like to be there, if possible. "

"I'll do that. Thank you, Allison." Karen disconnected and dropped the phone on the chair beside her. She was numb. In her heart she had known Bill was gone, but feeling it and having someone say the words out loud were two completely different things. A few minutes ago she could tell herself that she was dreaming or over-reacting because of worry or lack of sleep, but she couldn't do that any longer. It was all real and if felt as if her heart had been ripped right out of her chest. It was as if part of her had been cut off and dragged away. She no longer felt whole.

Karen didn't know how long she cried. It could have been hours or seconds; she had lost all sense of time and place. Every possible emotion flowed through her body. She stood on the balcony in the middle of the storm clutching the railing sobbing painfully. She cried Bill's name and futilely begged him to come home. She cried out angrily to God in one breath and then in the next, thanked Him for allowing Bill to be part of her life for the few years they had together.

The tears finally subsided. Karen knew there would be more to follow, but for the moment she was all cried out. In many ways the tears were better than the emptiness that followed. Her mind seemed completely blank. She couldn't form a coherent thought. She knew that she needed to call Bill's sons. It wouldn't be long before a list of names of those killed at the White House would be released. She needed to call them before they read their father's name on the internet. She knew she had to do it, but she couldn't imagine what she would say to them. How could she tell them that their father was gone? The pain of it was far more than she ever imagined it could be; her body physically hurt as if every nerve was firing relentlessly at a nearby pain receptor. Karen curled up in an almost fetal position on the chair, hugging her knees with her head bent down and resting on top of them. She listened to the wind. It was still strong despite the fact that the storm seemed to have moved off in the distance. She wished the wind would carry her away. There was no reason for it not to. She could think of no real reason to go on living.

No reason, that is, until a sound from behind her brought her out of her reverie and reminded her that life simply had to go on. She immediately chastised herself for forgetting, for not realizing that she couldn't curl up and die. Her grief simply could not have the power to ruin her life. Karen Hayes Buchanan had an important mission in life. It was one that Bill had entrusted to her and she would never let him down.

She turned teary eyes to the source of the sound. It was her favorite sound. A sound that normally delighted her and brought a smile to her face. A quiet voice that, soft as it was, seemed to shatter the night and bring Karen back to the world of the living.

"Mommy, I can't sleep."