"Your so funny Alfie!" says my girlfriend,Amber. It's amazing right? Me,Alfie Lewis is dating the oh-so hot Amber! I can barely believe it. She's so hot,beautiful really. Her silky blonde hair,her peachy soft skin,he icy blue eyes. She's amazing. Sitting here with her in the Anubis House,friends eating in the dining table next to us,no mysteries to solve,no school to bore us:it's perfect.

"Well thanks babe." Isn't it great that I can call her babe!

Amber giggles,then leans over the couch to kiss my cheek. I'm seriously on cloud nine right now! I can't believe it. Amber looks at me with her blue eyes and smiles,and I stupidly grin at her.

"Ugh would you two stop that?" The 'evil witch',Patricia says in disgust. "SOME people are trying to eat here."

I turn around,still smiling. Nothing,not even Patricia can ruin this. From the dining table Patricia sarcastically smiles back. Nope,she still not ruining my happiness right now. "Sorry Patricia," I tell her. "I guess Amber and I could put the couple stuff on hold if it annoys you all."

"Oh don't be so modest boo!" Amber steps over the couch and puts her arms around me. i don't think I can move...at all. "We're a couple. We should show it!" She gives me a soft peck on my lips and runs off.

Mick chuckles. "She's already calling you boo? She didn't call me that until about three weeks of dating."

I don't really pay attention,though. I softly touch my lips with my fingers. That's strange. It feels...different than I thought.

It feels like...it was nothing. This may seem really girly,but shouldn't there be like...a spark or something? Maybe it's because it was such a short kiss. Yeah,that's got to be it. Besides I shouldn't believe those chick flicks Amber's been making me watch.

Although I have to admit some of them can be pretty good...Wait what am I thinking?

"Hello! Alfie! Come back to Earth buddy," Jerome calls out,snapping me out of my thoughts.

"What?" I ask.

"We were just talking about you and Amber," Jerome continues,then takes a bite out of his sandwich.

"Do we really have to?" Patricia asks.

"Be nice," Mara tells her. Patricia leans back and crosses her arms.

Nina ignores her. She turns to me and smiles. "Sooo hows dating Amber?"

I smile back and sit on the back of the couch. "It's-" How do I describe this...amazing thing with Amber? "All that I wanted."

"Aww," Nina says while cocking her head.

Patricia frowns then drops her fork,which turns all heads to her. "I've got the go," she says then picks up her plate and heads out.

Mara sighs,then picks up her plate. "Patricia wait," She follows her.

"What's up with her?" I ask when they both are gone. This isn't the first time Patricia's acted weird around me. It's usually when I'm with or talking about Amber. She just gets all awkward all of a sudden,then leaves. She doesn't really explain why she leaves too.

Fabian turns to Nina and raises an eyebrow. "You don't think-"

Nina shrugs. "Maybe."

"But...Patricia?"

"It could happen to anybody."

"What could happen to anybody?" I hate it when people keep secrets from me.

Nina and Fabian both sit up. "Nothing," Nina says nervously. "Nothing at all!"

I frown,then look at Fabian. If anybody was going to spill something like this,it would Fabian. He may be able to keep life or death secrets,but he is terrible at gossip. "Do you know Fabian?" I narrow my eyes.

Fabian fidgets. "Uhh..."

"Okay Fabian I think it's time to go!" Nina grabs her plate,stands up,and pulls Fabian out of the room.

There's silence for a while.

"It's seems like there's been a lot of drama since I've been gone." Joy says.

Jerome nods. "You. Have. No. Idea."

I finally found out why Patricia has been acting so weird! It's obvious,I should have seen it before! I'm such an idiot! Thankfully I was able to hear Mara and Patricia's conversation earlier today before it was too late.

So I was just strolling through the upstairs hallway,off to visit my girlfriend's room when I noticed that Mara,Joy,and Patricia's room door was open. I wasn't snooping as much...observing their conversation...Anyway,I heard Mara say-"I know why you're acting like this Patricia."

And Patricia said. "Ugh! Mara! I hate this! Can everybody see it?"

"I don't get it. I thought this had always been something you swore never would happen."

"I don't know...I guess I changed."

"You're changing?"

"I guess. Whenever I see the two together, I just can't stand it!"

"You have to tell Alfie."

"Mara! I can't. He'll think it's stupid."

"Patricia! It's Alfie we're talking about! You have to tell him before it gets out of control and you end up hurting everybody."

"Ah...I guess you're right. I'll go see Alfie."

And that's all I heard,but of course I knew what they were talking about. Patricia has been acting weird for a long time,she hates seeing Amber and I together,she's starting to change,and she's about to go out of control. Isn't it obvious?

Patricia is an alien. There's no other possibility!

It's just like the movie I was watching last night,The Face Eaters. There the aliens look and act human at first,but then they start to metamorphosize into face eating monsters!

All the traits add up. Patricia has been acting weird and has been avoiding me lately,which could probably be caused by the pain of her transformation and the fact that she knows I'm an alien expert and doesn't want to reveal her secret. Aliens hate human emotion,especially love,that is why she hates seeing Amber and I together. AND she's been talking about losing control and hurting everyone,which means that her metamorphosis is almost complete. And everybody is in with it,Mara,and possibly Fabian and Nina.

It's a good thing I learned about it now,before it was too late.

What Patricia doesn't know,is that I know her little secret,and I know her weakness. See,in the movie,the aliens couldn't stand water. That's how they trapped the aliens,and I'm going to use it to trap Patricia. I have my belt equipped with water balloons. I have a filled,two gallon water gun in my hand,and there's a net set up on the opposite side of my room. So when Patricia comes in she's-

"Alfie! Can I come in?"

It's her! Time to position myself beside the door. "Come in!" I tell her.

She opens the door. It's now or never. "Alfie. I have to tell you,I-"

I emerge from my hiding spot and throw as many water balloons I can in he direction. You should see the look on the alien's face. She's really angry! This is perfect. "Alfie what are you doing?"

"Shut up alien beast!" I shoot my water gun at her,sadly she's not moving toward the net. "I know you're secret!"

"Secret! You know?"

"Yes,Patricia! I know that you are an...alien!"

Patricia just stops,then she laughs her evil alien mocking laugh. "Alien? Alfie you're such an idiot."

"Wait." I lower my water gun. "So...that's not your secret?" Ugh! How could I be wrong? "What is it then! Tell me!" I order her.

Then,she kisses me. I feel my lips buzzing,my stomach is churning. So that's how it ends then? She's turning me into one of her kind! I was right after all! She is an alien. She's trying to send her alien dna into me and turn me into one of her kind.

My stomach is still buzzing. It's starting! I clutch me stomach and bend down to my knees.

Patricia raises an eyebrow. "Alfie,what are you doing?"

"Mind turning blank. Stomach churning. I'm turning into an alien. Gah!" Goodbye human life. At least I got to kiss a girl before turning into an evil alien.

"Alfie stop it! I'm not an alien!"

My eyes pop open. I look up at Patricia. "Then why did you kiss me!"

Patricia crosses her arms. "Because...well...I like you..."

"Oh..." I sit up and contemplate over this. "So I'm guessing Mara isn't an alien either?"

I apologize for the suckiness of this. It's my first HOA story. I hope you liked it and review!