A/N - This was just a fun little thing I wrote a while ago. Takes place from Hermione's POV in her, technically, 8th year (the trio, and most of their class, has returned to complete their 7th year). Figured I might as well upload it. Enjoy!
Disclaimer - If I were JK Rowling I would not be writing fanfiction.
The girls in my dormitory were really starting to annoy me. Basically what it boils down to is this: Lavender and Parvati, for the past few years, have been pouring over Witch Weekly like it's a signed, first edition manuscript of Hogwarts: a History. With every issue, they become enamored and obsessed with some new topic and they talk it to death every second of every minute of every hour we are awake in that dorm. For example, last week's fascination was Monica Le'Peaux, an up-and-coming model who, according to the incessant squealing of my roommates, "has like the greatest outfits and is so totally nice." Right, because the way some French chick acts in an interview is absolutely the same as her actual personality. Oh, and obviously, Lavender and Parvati would know this because they have clearly met this international super star. Yeah . . .
This week Lavender and Parvati were all about "the biggest event in Witch Weekly history ever." From what I could gather, the magazine was publishing its annual Top 10 Most Eligible Bachelors spread this week. I guess I can partially understand their excitement; since most of our friends are of-age now, they are technically eligible. I had no doubt that both Harry and Ron would be on the list; they were war heroes after all. What I didn't expect was that my roommates would spend the entire week discussing who would make it, who wouldn't, and why each decision might have been made. I know, I know. After six years with these girls I should have expected it. I really should have, but for some reason, I guess I underestimated their power to annoy the hell out of me.
"… No matter what though reporters would have had to find out, so yeah, I mean they can't just leave Neville off. He's definitely on the list." They had been discussing whether or not Neville, due to his heroic actions in the war last year and his much improved appearance (so it took him a little while to bulk up, what's the big deal?), would make it onto the list for the past forty-five minutes.
"Neville wouldn't be able to keep a secret like that though." Lavender responded. I rolled my eyes.
"Don't be stupid Lavender. They don't tell the winners if they make it!" Jeez. It took me a second or two but I finally managed to tune them out again—at least until I heard:
"On looks alone Draco Malfoy is so totally shag-able." Girly-girls say what? Unfortunately, now I just couldn't help but cut in.
"I'm sorry," I interrupt, getting really surprised stares when I do, "but what was that?"
Parvati giggles shyly. Everybody knows that I have been getting along much better with the former evil-Slytherin Malfoy. And yes, I said former. He really has changed, and I've seen it happen. When school started back up, he was one of the few Slytherins to return to take their seventh year over again. He has yet to insult me in any way or be anything but polite to people he used to torment on a daily basis. He's still playing Quidditch and making use of his money but other than certain elitist qualities (such as the idea that money can do almost anything and an ego the size of China), he is no more the pureblooded bigot than I am.
"Well, when it comes to looks there is no denying that Malfoy is so far beyond everybody else. I mean, he's gorgeous. But he's a total asshole."
"What do you mean he's an asshole? He hasn't said a single derogatory thing—well, a single derogatory thing that a normal teenage boy wouldn't say—all year!" I cry, getting more and more upset. Apparently my roommates were getting a bit aggravated as well.
"Oh come on Hermione! Fine, he's polite and non-belligerent. But do you seriously think that he'd actually lower himself so far as to have sex with somebody of a "lesser blood-status" than his?" Lavender practically shouts out.
Well, yeah! He's changed! I really truly believe this, and I explain this to the girls. The three of us sit in crackling tension for a few silent moments. Finally, Lavender smiles eerily.
"Would you be willing to get proof of that?" she asks me. Excuse me? Proof? They're kidding right? They're not actually asking me to have sex with Draco Malfoy right?
Ugh. It's times like these when I really can't stand these two annoyances. Half the time they act cool and blasé about sex and the other half of the time they act like naughty little tweens playing a game of truth-or-dare. They want me to get proof? Seriously?
"Fine."
"Remember Hermione, you have until the end of this week to get him to sleep with you. He's got to be sober and he's got to be the one to instigate it." I roll my eyes. I am well aware of the terms, thank you Lavender.
"You can try to seduce him in any way you can. I still think you should have let us do your hair and makeup though; I mean, you're just so boring looking and it's not like this is a bet or anything so we really do want to help you. He's not going to want to even kiss you!" Parvati is rambling. I take three deep breaths and count slowly to twenty. 'Don't hurt her' I keep repeating to myself. I really don't like these girls.
"Ready, Hermione? The first attempt can be made in the Great Hall, so-"
I cut her off. "Lavender, please just shut up. I'm not a total moron, you know." Of course, this offends her so she actually does what I want for once and shuts up. Thank Merlin.
We round the corner and can already hear the chatter of the Great Hall at breakfast. I have to admit, I am a little bit nervous. I am in no way unsure about doing whatever it is I am going to do to "seduce" Draco Malfoy. I am, however, a bit worried about doing it in the Great Hall, in front of the whole school and the teachers. I don't care though, because whatever I have to do I am going to do. I need to prove not just to my roommates but also to myself that Draco Malfoy has changed. I need to.
"Good luck Hermione." Yikes.
"Draco!" I shout as I enter the Great Hall. "Hey! Draco Malfoy!" Heads everywhere turn to look at me as I march not towards the Gryffindor table but towards the Slytherin one and, more specifically, towards Draco Malfoy.
"Hey!" I call again as I get closer. Behind me, I can see Lavender and Parvati taking a seat at the Gryffindor table, mentally taking note of everything I'm doing, most likely.
At this point, Draco has clearly heard me and is turning around and standing up out of his seat. I reach him just as he is stepping out into the aisle between the two tables and I can't help but stop and take a giant breath.
Gods he is gorgeous.
"Hi." I whisper. He gives me a weird look, quirking his eyebrow and smirking just-so as if he isn't sure how to react to me.
"Hi." His confusion is evident in his voice and, though most likely invisible to everyone else, I can sense his tension and a little bit of anxiety.
"Hi." I say again, and then I kiss him. And I don't mean a cutesy little peck on the cheek. I mean like, arms around his neck, on my tip-toes (because yes, he is that tall), lips connected and eyes closed, full on snog session. Within seconds his body completely relaxes, his arms are around me and I am in the air. My legs wrap around him, we add some tongue action, and before he can even move to my neck (I've got this one spot right below my left ear), Blaise Zabini yells to get a room, students start catcalling, and Headmaster McGonagall is shouting to "break it up please." Smirking (Draco) and blushing (me), we separate but keep our foreheads touching for a few heated seconds.
"Good morning." Draco whispers, smiling. "Not that I minded but…why?" Whispering as well, I assure him that I will explain everything later. The shouting of our peers dies down and the Slytherins at the table make room for me to join them.
"How did you do that?" Here we go. I turn around and sure enough, there are Lavender and Parvati hovering over me like ... well ... shocked teenage girly-girls. I roll my eyes again at their antics, in an attempt to control my anger.
"Parvati, Lavander, for two of Hogwarts self-professed gossip-girls you're really oblivious to legitimate gossip." I reply angrily. Some of the Slytherins near me snicker. "I'd like you to meet my boyfriend, whom I have been sleeping with since this summer, Draco Malfoy. Oh and to answer another one of your idiotic questions, no he will not be on the Most Eligible Bachelors list."
A/N - Well? Let me know what you think!