"Don't say you haven't thought about it," he commented, taking a swig of his drink.
Alex considered. "Well, I suppose so…" Unconsciously, she tilted her head back and slightly to one side, lips pursed and a faraway look in her eyes. He recognised the pose: it was the look she got when she was meditating on some problem, like some bloody psychic calling on answers from the beyond. "I mean, it would be a mistake, obviously. Spontaneous, most likely, and almost certainly fuelled by alcohol. I'd surmise... up against a wall, clothes mostly still on, a sort of 'end of the disco' type feel to it. More urgency than finesse, probably - hardly candlelight and wining and dining, no, more a sort of... venting of frustration if anything." She seemed to come to, smiling brightly with that head girlish air of having satisfactorily solved a slightly tricky puzzle and restored the world to rights.
"Bloody hell…" he said.
"What?"
"Well that's a pretty specific scenario you've got worked out there. Please do let me know if I've missed my cue - I'd hate to think you'd been waiting."
She rolled her eyes. "Oh, please… I'm simply articulating the most likely set of circumstances which would lead to the consummation of any kind of physical relationship. The actual possibility is still extraordinarily remote, but if it did happen then chances are it would unfold along those lines."
"Unfold? Where I come from it's usually more of an unzip but you always did know how to overcomplicate things."
"Well yes, I can see how it would seem that way if your usual benchmark for courtship is to club a girl over the head and drag her back to your cave…"
"Never had any complaints."
"Well... no - I imagine the poor women are too shell-shocked quite frankly."
"Quite right," he said decisively, taking another swig of beer and smacking his lips. "Keep it simple, Bolls: me man, you woman; I've got it, you want it; you can have it for twenty minutes and then I can be having a smoke while you sort the dishes and contemplate how very lucky you are."
Alex sighed. "It's a lovely picture." She raised her glass in a mock toast. "Still. Not without a lot of alcohol."
Gene nodded. "Another round?"