A/N: This is my submission for the Secret Santa gift swap at the Snark and Handcuffs comm on Livejournal. It's still anonymous at the moment, so I don't know who I filled this for, but Happy Holidays and I hope you like it!

Happy Holidays: A Rogues Christmas Story

The Friday after Thanksgiving, when Len Snart showed up at the Rogues' latest hideout, he thought for a moment that he may have accidentally wandered into a Toys R Us. He blinked a few times, walked back out the front door, checked that it was in fact the abandoned furniture factory he thought it was, and went back inside.

He was just in time to see James Jesse, decked out in a turn-of-the-century one piece striped bathing suit and a Santa hat, cannonball from the stairwell and land in a pile of Teddy bears on the first floor. It was reminiscent of Scrooge McDuck diving into his money vault, which Len figured was what the hyperactive spazz was going for.

"Jesse!" He barked. "What the hell is all this?" He gestured wildly at the piles of toys crowding what had recently been a perfectly functional hideout.

"My haul," James said, head popping out of a pile of bears sans Santa hat. "I hit up some Black Friday sales."

"Any particular reason you robbed a toy store?" Because Len didn't believe for a second that Jesse had bought the junk.

"Seven stores, actually," James corrected. "And dude, the places were stocked with all the best toys of the season. Do you know how much raw material I now have to gimmick up? Plus, those Sesame Street dolls over there? Those are the hot toys this year. Thanks to me not a single parent in the Twin Cities will be able to buy one. They're gonna be worth more than Kryptonite in Metropolis!"

Len eyed the stack of Elmo dolls with renewed interest, but tamped it down. "This is still our hideout, not a damn storage locker. Move it somewhere else!"

"Dude!" Came a muffled shout from the bathroom. "Someone filled the shower with super soakers!"

James grinned. "Sounds like Sam doesn't mind me storing the loot here."

Sure enough, as more of the Rogues filtered in, they were generally pleased with a hideout full of toys (they were nothing if not emotionally stunted overgrown children when they got their costumes on, sometimes even without the costumes). Soon Len and Roscoe were the only ones not participating in a Nerf battle, instead glowering at their cohorts from the only sofa that hadn't been turned into a fort.

"So undignified," Roscoe sniffed. Len only growled since he didn't want to be caught agreeing with Roscoe about anything.

Undignified did pretty much cover it though.

Just then, Sam passed by their line of sight wearing a vest armed with rounds of Nerf ammunition and his own mirror gadgets. Mick was on his trail with a super soaker full of chocolate sauce.

Roscoe quirked an eyebrow. "That's a new one."

"Gotta be JJ," Len said, trying to look stern and disapproving, but really…the absurdity of water guns with condiments in them kind of cycled back around from annoying to amusing. It's not like anyone had to clean the place up, after all.

Then a water balloon full of Mountain Dew exploded on his head. Len glared above him, where James was dancing through the air, now wearing his Trickster cape and the snow boot version of his airwalkers with the Santa hat and a sweatshirt over the bathing suit. His laughter was infectious-not the Trickster laugh from when he fought Flash or plotted with the others, but the real laughter of James Jesse, the nineteen year old who was really five.

Roscoe gripped a top threateningly. "Just try it," He growled.

"Alright!" James said with a grin, and he caught Roscoe on the top of the head. Len was suddenly less irritated with his own Mountain Dew when he saw the maple syrup sliding down Roscoe's face.

Piper pulled up in front of the Rogues' hideout, slumped down in his seat, and banged his head on the steering wheel.

His Thanksgiving hadn't gone exactly how he'd planned.

It was Piper's first real Thanksgiving away from his parents (he wasn't counting last year-he'd only just run away and had still been living in his car with a bag of his father's money on the front seat for company. If there was no turkey it did not count). This year he had his own apartment, which he'd figured out how to decorate after some mishaps that he might be able to laugh over when a little more time went by. This year he also had a boyfriend to mock him while he tangled pieces of scotch tape around his fingers and in his hair, and then ultimately discovered that scotch tape wasn't strong enough to hold most of his decorations to the wall and he was supposed to use thumb tacks. He'd tried in vain to cook a few things and then broken into a bakery and just stolen the damn pumpkin pie (and he'd had a boyfriend to mock him for that one too). He'd had a boyfriend to cuddle with while they watched the Thanksgiving Day parade, making token comments against capitalism just to make himself feel better as he thoroughly enjoyed the floats.

And he'd had an idiot boyfriend who'd gone out for a solo heist without telling Piper and gotten arrested. On frickin' Thanksgiving. Piper wasn't breaking the creep out of jail just for that reason. Earl knew how much Piper wanted to try having a happy holiday celebration. He'd never gotten one with his family, and living on his own was supposed to rectify that.

Plus he was hurt that Earl hadn't invited him along. If he'd been there, chances are they'd be at home munching on pumpkin pie surrounded by stacks of banded bills. They worked best as a team. Earl knew that.

Friggin' idiot. Jerk. Holiday-ruiner.

Piper finally lifted his head from the steering wheel and made his way into the hideout. He was so caught up in his circular thoughts of self-pity that he wasn't paying attention to the noises coming from the place. Therefore, he didn't notice that he was walking through the middle of a warzone. There was a tipped over couch-fort on one side of the room and a tipped over poker table-fort on the other, and he was walking between them.

He was hit with James' condiment-balloons, the chocolate syrup super soaker, a super soaker loaded with plain old water, and a trick boomerang because Digger never quite got that the game didn't involve actually hurting the other participants (well, other than their dignity).

Piper just stood in the center of the room with his arms out for a moment, registering the fact that he was covered with a sticky mixture of syrup and soda, and that his head was stinging from where he'd been struck by the boomerang, then he yelled something that only vaguely resembled swear words and ran from the room.

The Rogues peered out from around their forts, a few giggling nervously.

"You, uh…don't think he's gonna hypnotize us into doing something crazy for that, do you?" Mick asked.

"Oh what Rory, you worried you can't handle the little Nancy?" Digger asked.

Then they all cracked up, Mark imitating the way Piper had stood in the middle of the room with his arms out, and doing just a little too good a job mimicking the look of confusion and, well, hurt he'd worn. James got Mark in the face with a syrup balloon, which got all the other Rogues back on track with their condiment fight, allowing James to slip out of the hideout unnoticed.

He found Piper in the back, trying to clean his hands with bits of a dirty snow bank. James hovered above the snow bank, and Piper sharply turned around, scrubbing harder at his reddened hands with what was essentially watery brown ice.

"Hey. 'Sup?" James greeted. Piper didn't dignify him with a response. "Just so you know, that wasn't anything personal. You stepped into the crossfire of an epic battle for the ages. We're all covered in goop. I was planning on taking care of it with an elaborate maze of slip'n slides I swiped from the store."

"And you really think slip'n slides are going to take care of maple syrup?" Piper demanded.

"Well, with the friendly modifications I made, sure." James smiled one of his most charming smiles, and then let it fall since Piper still wasn't looking at him. Sighing, he kicked off his shoes and lightly floated down to the ground to stand beside him.

He and Piper were two of the youngest Rogues, and the generation gap coupled with their not-so-villainous villainous motives made them the misfits of the group of misfits. Part of the reason James had stayed in Central after getting out of jail for his first series of heists was because he was sure no other network of supervillains would take him. He just wasn't as into material gain (which was easy-I mean c'mon, why become a supervillain and invite the attention of a superhero if all you wanted was money?) as he was into messing with the Flash.

And Piper…no one understood Piper. Len kept saying that Piper had joined the wrong side, and sooner or later he'd be running with the Capes. James, for one, intended to exploit the confused and idealistic young hypnotist to the fullest before that happened, because he saw it too. Piper wasn't trying to bring mayhem to the world; he was trying to right wrongs. He was just angry and rebellious. When he matured and calmed down a little, he'd stop robbing banks and start working at food pantries or something.

James held a hand equally covered in marshmallow goop and chocolate sauce to Piper and tried another charming smile. "C'mon, at least let me show you the slip'n slides. I've got 'em on the third floor. It's heated up there, and you won't have to scrub your skin raw."

For a moment, there was a flash of vulnerability in Piper's large blue eyes. James was caught by them, feeling momentarily as trapped as Piper looked, but without the haunted quality. Then the moment was gone, covered by a sneer of derision that was as blatant a mask as Len's gruff exterior and Roscoe's pretension. They were all hiding emotional scars and running away from tragic pasts. James had figured that much about the Rogues before he'd built his first trick yo-yo. The thing was, he actually wanted to know what Piper was running from.

"What's the trick James?"

"Whaddya mean?"

Piper rolled his eyes. "Why are you being nice? Why aren't you laughing at me like everyone else? I can hear them in there, laughing at the little fag running off by himself to cry because they hurt his delicate feelings."

"They are not saying it like that," James said.

Piper glared. "I cleaned it up. Anyway, I'm done with pranks for today. I'll just head home. Thanks anyway," He snapped, dripping sarcasm.

James kicked his airwalkers back on and pretended to think hard as Piper started to walk away. "Hm…nope. I don't accept that." He dove forward, grabbed Piper around the middle, and hoisted him into the air. Piper let out a girly shriek of terror as he was suddenly heading for the third floor. Instinctually, he tried to wriggle out of James' grip, and James hugged him harder.

"C'mon dude! We're already high enough that you'd break something if I dropped you!"

"Let me go!" Piper yelled. Thankfully, it wasn't with his hypnotic-conviction, and James managed to get his wriggling hostage into the room on the third floor that was loaded up with gimmicked slip'n slides. He tossed off his cape and Santa hat, toed off the airwalkers, and then flipped a switch.

Piper backed against a wall with his fingers splayed flat to the cement blocks as the room erupted into high pressure sprays of hot water and bubbles.

James, ignoring Piper's terror, dove onto the nearest slip'n slide track, and tried to slide across the room. He was still wearing his sweatshirt, which didn't work well on the plastic, so he stripped that off and tried again. This time, wearing only the old timey bathing suit, he slid nearly the length of the room, which spanned three slip'n slides placed end to end.

And if he wasn't much mistaken, Piper was staring at him.

James turned around and grinned at him, and watched Piper's fair skin turn bright red. Yep, the gay guy had definitely been checking him out while he was soaking wet, even though he was dressed like Scrooge McDuck and sporting more condiments than a sundae made by an unsupervised five year old. It was oddly flattering. James took his next slide, curved, and landed at Piper's feet. He struck a pose and waggled his eyebrows.

"Gonna join me Red?"

"James, what are you…?" Piper started to ask. James regarded him with the mischievous-yet-innocent look he'd perfected at age three, but before the flustered young man opposite him could string together a coherent response, they were interrupted by most of the other Rogues clambering into the room to investigate the noises.

"Dude! Slip'n slides!" Mark yelled. He belly flopped onto the nearest one and went almost as far as James had managed on his first sweatshirt-free slide. After that, the room was full of shouting, tipsy, full-grown men playing with the modified children's toys.

In the excitement, James lost sight of Piper. He grabbed his airwalkers and hopped out the nearest window, and was just in time to see Piper's car tear down the street.

Piper didn't show up at the hideout at all during the ensuing week. James made himself scarce as well, since every time he happened by Len snapped something about chocolate stains and roaches as though they had something to do with him.

He finally decided to take a bold step and just invite himself over to Piper's.

James wasn't sure exactly what it was about the other guy…he just knew he wanted to get to know him. And it wasn't because Piper was gay, because James would only care about that if he was gay, and he wasn't. He'd just noticed that Piper had really nice blue eyes (James did too, but Piper's were darker…maybe that's why James found them so interesting?)…Piper had really nice blue eyes with long lashes that were dark brown even though he had light hair, and his hair was pretty too…and, well, he just would make a very attractive woman. If he'd been a woman.

That was it. James would be very attracted to Piper if he were a girl, but since he wasn't it was just an intellectual attraction.

And he'd rehearsed that to himself so many times he almost believed it too.

He showed up at Piper's living room window and knocked to be let in. He could just see the other crook, perched on a stepladder with bits of string in his mouth and holding a hammer in one hand. At the sound of James' knock, Piper was startled and he fell off the stepladder, landing painfully on his rear. He dropped the hammer on his foot, and as James watched he grabbed it, howling in pain, dropped the string, and a garland of fake maple leaves landed on his head.

James laughed, and then smacked a hand over his mouth to stifle the giggles. Piper glared at him through the window, then stalked over and flung it open. He was trailing fake maple leaves like a bridal train. "What?" He snapped.

"Just dropping by to say hi. You haven't been by the hideout lately," James said, holding his hands up in a disarming fashion. Piper narrowed his eyes, so James quirked an eyebrow and waved his empty hands a bit. "I swear, I mean no harm."

"Fine, c'mon in." Piper flung open the window, then immediately stalked back where he was to clean up the mess.

James took a look around the apartment, which he could see much better from the other side of the window. There were two large boxes sitting on the coffee table, and all manner of warm and cozy looking fall decorations were being thrown into them with the haphazard lack-of-care that indicated bitterness. Tellingly, no Christmas decorations were going up to replace them. The living room gave way to a kitchenette by the front door, and there was a store bought pumpkin pie sitting on the counter with a plastic fork shoved in the center. As if that wasn't lonely enough, James caught sight of a smaller box by the trash barrel that had been stuffed with picture frames showing Piper with an undeniably handsome but thuggish looking guy maybe a couple years older than they were. There were other mementos in it, like ticket stubs, a carnival teddy bear, and a hundred dollar bill with a heart drawn on it in red Sharpie.

James took all this in, then turned back to his scowling companion. "Need any help taking down the Thanksgiving decorations?"

"Nope," Piper returned in a clipped, defensive tone. He yanked the fall leaves off of him, threw them in the box, and then tugged the remaining garland off the mantelpiece without any attempt at care, yanking up thumb tacks in the process and sending them flying. James dodged them, and despite Piper's response, helped him clean up the decorations anyway. When they were done, Piper tossed the boxes unceremoniously by the box of relationship mementos.

"Uh…aren't you gonna want some of this stuff later?" James asked.

"Nope." Piper was just as monosyllabic as before.

"But, like, couldn't you at least donate the fall decorations?"

"James, just leave it. I just want them gone."

James reached into the memento box and pulled out the hundred. "Well can I at least have this? It's real, right?"

Piper yanked it out of his hand and tore it into pieces. "It was." He turned on his heel, stalked into his bedroom and slammed the door shut.

Far from considering that a dismissal, James took it as an opportunity to snoop. He went through the boyfriend box until he found what he really wanted-love letters and newspaper clippings. As he suspected, Piper's recent beau had also been a costumed criminal, though from the looks of it, not nearly as competent a costumed criminal as Piper. He guessed that the hundred had been from their first heist together, which was kind of cute. It was the type of thing he'd do if he had a boy-girlfriend in tights.

After snooping to his heart's content, James carefully repacked the fall decorations and stowed them in a closet. He threw out the pumpkin pie, tidied up a few other things, then left the way he'd come.

Piper fell onto his bed and listened curiously to the sounds in his main room. He could hear James puttering around, and figured the pest was probably looking for things to take out of Piper's trash boxes. Whatever. There wasn't anything of value in either of them, other than the hundred, which he'd already destroyed. Everything else was just trinkets and mementos from the latest in a series of failed relationships.

Piper hugged a pillow to his chest and let out a sigh. What was it about him that drove people away? He hadn't been able to satisfy his parents in anything. He'd been a disappointment right from the womb. The rest of his family had been more quiet in their disapproval of him, but disapprove they did. By the time he was in school, he'd never bothered to try. Better to just let people know from the outset that they were dealing with a failure. And then he'd tried romantic relationships, and for a while, he was able to make those work. Inevitably though, his partners noticed whatever it was about him that repulsed the rest of humanity, and Piper wound up alone again.

After about ten minutes or so, he heard James take off through the open window. He wondered for a moment why the other crook had bothered dropping by. Probably just looking for an assist on a heist or something.

Piper thought about getting up and finishing cleaning up his apartment, but he really didn't want to bring his box of memories down to the dumpster. Taking all the pictures down had been hard enough. He'd do it later. At the moment a nap sounded spectacular.

When Piper emerged from his bedroom, groggily rubbing at his eyes, he half-wondered if he'd been kidnapped while he slept. Was this some kind of elaborate prank of the Flash's? His nemesis had certainly done some weird things to him over the past year and a half…but the weird things were usually mean spirited, what with their antagonistic relationship. This wasn't the Flash's work.

His apartment was decorated for Christmas. There were garlands and lights over the doorways and the mantelpiece, he had a stocking he didn't recognize labeled Hartley in ornate gold script, he had a tree, there were Christmas CDs and movies sitting on his TV, and there was a homemade pumpkin pie sitting on his counter, with a plate and a pie server sitting next to it.

Piper took a cautious sniff, and caught the scent of an apple cinnamon candle mingling pleasantly with the tree and the pie. He stared at the cozy scene, blinked a few more times, then turned on his heel and went back to bed.

However, the next morning it was all still there.

And the pie was really good.

"So what's going to happen to me?"

"Hm?"

Piper sat down on an orange crate next to the sofa that sometimes served as one of the legs of the coffee table at the Rogues' hideout. James was sprawled over the sofa, wearing a kiss the cook apron over his costume. There were pumpkin pies for each of the Rogues sitting on the poker table, each in a pie plate in the colors of its intended crook.

"I ate the entire pie," Piper said. "What's going to happen? I was expecting ex-lax at first, but nothing happened. It's been long enough that it worked through my system. What did you do to it?"

James sat up and rubbed at the back of his neck. He scrunched his face up, as though he were about to admit something foul. "Well…I did add a bit too much nutmeg. I mean, I tried to balance it out with more cinnamon and some confectioner's sugar, which I usually never put on my pies."

Piper frowned. "So it wasn't a trick?"

"Despite the name, not everything I do's a trick. You looked pretty bummed and I figured you could use a holiday pick-me-up. Did it help?"

Piper nodded. "It helped a lot. Th-thanks. That was…" He paused, having trouble finding the right word. "Thoughtful. That was really thoughtful of you."

James beamed. "You're welcome!"

"Ooooh! Pies!" Mark exclaimed, walking into the hideout and breaking up Piper and Trickster's little moment. He grabbed a tin at random, grabbed a fork, and sat down across from them to start eating. Mick walked in and frowned at him.

"I think that one was mine. It's white with orange flames on it. There's a green and yellow one right there."

"I'm sure they're all the same," Mark managed to choke out around his full mouth. Shrugging, Mick grabbed Len's and sat down.

Soon enough almost all the Rogues were stuffing their faces with pies. Digger was the only one who'd grabbed the appropriately colored pie. Roscoe was looking at the one intended for Roy, a wary look on his face as he sniffed at a forkful. He took a cautious bite, waited for something to happen, then took another careful bite.

Len was the only one who refrained from pie entirely, and the one that had been intended for Sam remained on the poker table.

"This pie's really good," Mick said. Digger let out an approving belch.

"You know Len, he made one for me and nothing happened," Piper said quietly. Len rolled his eyes.

"Yeah, but it was for you kid."

"So?"

Len let out an exasperated sigh, but before he got the chance to elaborate, Mark shot up and ran past them for the bathroom. A moment later they heard horrible retching noises. Roscoe dropped his fork with a loud clatter and violently shoved the pie tin away. It was too late, however. Soon everyone except Piper, James and Len were holding their stomachs, running for the bathroom, or looking for another place to barf.

James smiled proudly. "Not ex-lax Piper, ipecac. No one ever expects that one."

Len shot a significant look Piper's way, but he was too busy laughing to notice it.

James' prank with the pies put almost all the Rogues out of commission for the night, and when they were feeling better they all wanted to kill the Trickster, so the thought of any kind of group heist was quickly abandoned. Piper felt a little bad. He'd kind of wanted the distraction of work, but then, he rarely felt better after a team up with the Rogues then when he'd gone in, and that was when he wasn't suffering through a breakup.

Eventually he'd bit the bullet and broken into Iron Heights to see Earl, intending to still let the insensitive creep break himself out but realizing that he would probably fold and so armed for an adventure. However, when he'd found Earl's cell he'd also found him busily networking with his cellmate, denigrating his flamboyant ex-partner in the process. Piper had thrown a fit, they'd had a huge fight, and he'd been lucky to get out of Iron Heights without an orange jumpsuit.

Seeing see Roscoe try to look dignified while hurling into a potted plant had been really amusing, and he did feel a bit better. The breakup still stung when he was by himself for too long though.

He went for a walk to distract himself and, much to his annoyance, found himself in the park in Central's square. An ice rink had been set up, and with the recent light fluffy snow, decorated trees along walkways and ambient lighting, the place was ideal for happily strolling couples.

Piper was tempted to hypnotize a particularly giddy young lady into walking into a low wall.

"Barry Allen I've been waiting here for an hour and a half! What is wrong with you?"

"I'm sorry hon, I just-I just lost track of-"

"Honest to God Barry, you are the slowest man alive!"

"Iris, please wait up!"

Piper smirked and tried not to openly giggle, one of many who'd turned to watch the commotion. He recognized the blond police scientist with the unflattering buzz cut-the guy always stared Piper down whenever they bumped into each other at the station and it was the creepiest thing. He hoped he didn't have some kind of weird stalker or something, because for some reason the guy was just obsessed with him (and whereas most of the Central City cops weren't fond of the supervillains in town, this guy had a particular hang up that creeped Piper the hell out).

Piper did like the man's fiancée well enough though. She was a pretty news reporter and was witty to boot. He could completely understand why Len had taken her hostage that one time, though they'd been forbidden from ever bringing it up as it had ended in a total disaster.

He enjoyed watching Iris West bitch out her fiancé until they moved out of sight, Allen all the while pleading with the woman to forgive him and groveling for his lateness. It was amusing, but once they were gone Piper was left with just the regular happy couples enjoying a pre-Christmas stroll, and that was much less enjoyable.

He started for the park's exit, and in the process passed by the ice skating rink where he glimpsed Len, looking just as miserable and out of place as he felt amongst all the romance. Piper waved at him, and Len walked over to join him.

"Thinking of ice skating?" Piper asked.

Len shook his head. "I just like to watch them sometimes. What about you kid? Surprised to see you here."

Piper shrugged. "Just taking a walk. Wish I'd picked somewhere a bit less sentimental for it though."

"Ah. Yeah, I was thinking that myself."

They started off together towards the exit, and even though Piper rarely saw Len outside his Captain Cold costume, it was a bit nice to have company. Especially company that looked almost as miserable as he felt.

Piper was a bit tempted to ask what was wrong, but he knew Len would never get an answer. Besides, he was even more tempted to ask something else. He just couldn't quite figure out how to start off the conversation...

"Just say it already."

"Pardon?"

Len rolled his eyes. "Pardon? You're as bad as Roscoe. Look, say 'what' next time. And the what is: do I really think JJ wants to fuck you."

This time Piper almost walked into the low garden wall. Funnily enough, it was the same one he'd wanted to hypnotize the ditzy girl into. "Len! I-that was-I was not going to ask that! Why would you say that?"

Len snorted. "Cuz the kid wants you, and I thought you finally got an inkling of it after the pie thing. Was I wrong? Are you stupider than I thought?"

"…James is straight."

"Yeah, he certainly thinks so. Might be a problem for you, cuz I don't think JJ has any idea how bad he's got it for you."

Piper frowned. "Wait…you said he wanted to fuck me. Do you really think he wants more?"

"I'd say there's an outside chance. All I know for sure is he's been staring at you for weeks and he's a helluva lot nicer to you than he is to…well, anyone."

Piper considered his words. "Len, I can't…I'm not over my last boyfriend."

Len looked thoughtful for all of ten seconds before stating firmly, "Your last boyfriend was a douchebag. Give it another couple days then try rebounding with the charming, blond, Italian acrobat alright?"

"Well, when you say it like that it makes it sound like nothing I've said is valid."

"That's cause it ain't valid Hartley."

"Well okay then."

Piper spent a lot of time thinking over what Len had said. He'd never given much thought to any of the Rogues as romantic prospects, given their professed sexual orientations and the fact that they were all unstable whackjobs (which was pot calling kettle black, he realized that, but hypocrisy did not lessen the truth of the statement). He'd always thought James was an annoying, hyperactive sleaze, albeit a cute one, and had never thought of him beyond how annoying the kid could make a heist.

But now that Len mentioned it, James was pretty thoughtful. And it wasn't just the fact that Piper had gotten the only safe pumpkin pie, or the fact that James had redecorated Piper's apartment to cheer him up. He usually did little things, like refilling Piper's ginger ale, or sitting with him when he'd been told to shut up during a poker night or a planning session.

The thing was, James also usually joined in with the others when they ripped on Piper for being gay, especially when James didn't think Piper could hear. If the guy actually was as smitten as he sometimes acted, he was too far in the closet to be datable. And Piper had no desire to try anything with a straight guy who was feeling a little confused: it hurt way too much when they realized they actually were straight.

It was up to James to make the first move then. And as Christmas got closer, Piper found himself waiting for something to happen. Then he started wondering if he really wanted it to happen at all. James was cute, but he was also loud, whiny and messy. Piper knew he'd be fine with spending a night with James, but if it was going to be a relationship, he wanted to see something deeper.

He swung by the hideout Christmas Eve, telling himself that it wasn't to contemplate the Trickster but to get out of the apartment and spend time with people. He still wasn't speaking to his family, he didn't have a boyfriend and his social circle was sadly tiny and mostly referred to him by assumed names: the Rogues were all he really had.

The hideout contained a pathetic little Christmas tree that wasn't even decorated as a nod to the season, and a string of tangled lights had been plugged in by the front door. Piper looked down at the sad little ball, thought about untangling it, and walked past it.

Digger and Sam were sitting on the couch drinking spiked eggnog out of cartons, occasionally toasting each other and yelling "Merry fucking Christmas!" while Len, Mick, Mark and Roscoe played poker. Roscoe looked tense about something. He kept shooting nervous looks at Len and checking his watch. He finally muttered something about meeting a girl and slipped out of the hideout, seeming to expect someone to ask him about his activities for the night, but as usual no one really cared.

James was nowhere to be seen, and that disappointed Piper more than he expected.

He sat in on a round of poker, but the game held about as much interest for him as it always did (which was to say none), so he didn't bother with a second. After stealing a sip of Sam's eggnog (which he instantly regretted; the creamy sludge burned!), he grabbed his coat and took off again, not at all looking forward to spending the night alone in his apartment.

Len watched him go, looking oddly upset about something.

"Jesse. What the hell are you doing?"

"Uh…" James thought the answer to that was quite obvious. "Carting the rest of my Elmo dolls to Blacksmith's place so I can clean up on 'em?"

"Not that," Len snapped. "Piper. What are you doing with Piper?"

James blinked at him in some confusion. "He doesn't work on holidays. Oh, wait, you think he will this time since he's single?"

Len smacked a hand to his forehead. "Jeeze kid, how long is this gonna take you?"

"You know, you're way better at communicating when you're leading a heist, just saying. I mean, I always know where you want me to lay my traps and all that jazz. But I have no clue what you're talking about tonight."

"Fine, I'll be clear. James, how do you feel about Hartley?"

Here James blushed, and Len was surprised to see it. "Wow kid. That bad?"

James frowned. "I don't know what you're talking about." He defensively picked up a box of Elmo dolls and carried them to the back of a pickup truck Len was pretty sure he'd never seen the kid with before.

"Yeah, I think you do. You light up when he's in the room. You're nice to him, and it'd all be disgustingly pathetic if it wasn't useful to me."

"Useful? Useful how?" James asked.

Len joined him by the pickup truck and leaned against it as he spoke. "We both know Hartley's not going to stay on our side forever. The kid's got too much of a moral backbone for it. Eventually he's gonna leave. But Hartley's a sucker for a pretty face, just like any of us. Doesn't matter that he likes men. He'll still do stupid shit for the sake of his feelings, even if he can tell it's stupid. You know much about his last boyfriend?"

"Earl Povich, aka Fury? Yeah, I read up on him," James admitted. Len quirked an eyebrow. "Oh shut up. I did not read up on Fury because I have the hots for Piper. So are you telling me your plan is for me to seduce Piper and keep him on our side a little longer?"

"Pretty much, yeah. I think you're up to it."

"Well that's a good plan and all Len, but it's not gonna work. I'm straight."

"No you're not."

James slammed his box down on the ground and spun around so Len would receive the full strength of his glare. "You can't just say I'm gay and it's true!"

"Sure I can. You're gay kid. Just accept it and start banging Piper. Everyone wins that way."

"Dammit Len! You have no idea what you're talking about!"

Len snorted. "Fine, I'm the clueless one. Ask yourself this though: would it be so bad? You and Piper?"

James angrily shoved the rest of the Elmo dolls into the truck, flipped Len off, climbed into the driver's side and drove off, leaving a laughing Captain Cold behind him.

The thing was, Len was absolutely right and James hated him a little for it. He'd been thinking for months about how awesome it would have been if Piper was a girl, and noticing little things, like that it had been over a year since his last relationship and that even though he had a pretty easy time picking up girls, he had a harder time finding one that he actually wanted to pick up.

He was almost to Blacksmith's when he banged an illegal u-turn and headed towards Piper's apartment. Len wasn't necessarily right, but he wanted to at least see Piper before he made any decisions.

When Piper got back from the hideout he immediately changed into comfy pajamas. He tried to light a fire in the fireplace, which he knew for a fact worked and wasn't just decorative because he'd seen Earl use it more than once, but he couldn't get the damn thing to go. He went through all his recycling and half a roll of wrapping paper trying to get a nice fat log to burn before he admitted defeat, and then he slumped on his couch with a piccolo to play carols for himself.

It was lonely as hell, but he tried to tell himself it was nice.

Then there was a knock at the door. Piper jumped to his feet and was halfway to the door before he skidded to a stop and ran into the bathroom. He brushed his hair and his teeth, regretted changing out of the sweater and the flattering jeans he'd been wearing earlier, and went to open the front door. Okay, so maybe James was immature and annoying, but he was hot as hell. And it had better be him on the other side of the door and not Len bugging him some more.

Thankfully it was James, wearing street clothes that he'd changed into hastily from the looks of it. He was still wearing the blue domino mask, though he didn't seem to be aware of it. Grinning, Piper stepped aside to let him in.

"Hey dude…er, why're you laughing?"

Piper reached over and tapped the bottom of the mask, his fingers brushing against James' cheek in the process. He looked confused, and even a bit shaken, but then it dawned on him and he took the mask off. "Oh. Oops. Uh, so hey. I was…I was on my way to Blacksmith's and I was just passing by. Um…y'wanna fence some goods with me?"

Piper glanced over his shoulder at the warm and cozy living room ready for holiday relaxing. He never worked on holidays, but then, the room was only warm and cozy because of the young man standing opposite him. 'The sexy young man,' Piper thought. "Yeah, sure. Just gimme a second to change."

"Oh. Oh! Great." James smiled at him, and Piper smiled back. He also whacked his shin on his coffee table while he walked to his bedroom.

The trip to Blacksmith's was of the short and awkward variety. It only ended up taking about twenty minutes to drop the Elmo dolls, and in that time James and Piper discovered that they had very little to say to each other. They had almost no common interests (being raised in a posh mansion and being raised in a traveling circus had very little cultural overlap, as it turned out) and once they worked through insulting the Flash both young men were out of conversation starters.

"Um…wanna come over to my place for cocoa? I've got some Christmas movies," James offered.

"I do too, thanks to you," Piper pointed out. "But sure…that'd be great."

'Why does this feel as awkward as a bad date?' both men silently wondered to themselves.

James parked the truck outside an aging but well maintained home, and it occurred to Piper that he'd never seen where the Trickster lived before. It wasn't what he'd expected, or it wouldn't have been if he'd ever thought to expect something. The place was tidy and non-descript.

Of course, that was only the outside. The interior was much more suited to James' over-the-top style. The walls of the entryway were painted fluorescent orange, the furnishings were cornflower blue, and there were bits of experimental gadgets and loose toys everywhere.

"Have a seat in the living room. I'll whip up our cocoas and be right in."

"Alright." Piper shrugged out of his coat and headed for a large room on the right where he could see a Christmas tree and a lot of striped, modern style furniture.

There was a blond woman sitting on the sofa. She squinted at Piper for a moment. "You're not Jamey."

"Er…nope," Piper agreed. "J-James?"

"Hm?"

"There's someone in your living room!" Piper called.

James walked in from an archway on the other end of the room, holding a tea kettle in one hand and a canister of cocoa powder in the other. He dropped both. "Ma? How the hell did you get in here?"

"The window dear."

"But I have everything rigged!"

"Mm. And I tripped your pie bombs before I broke in. Don't worry sweetheart, I didn't hurt myself."

Piper gaped at the woman with almost the same level of astonishment as James. It had never occurred to him that the other Rogues must have families too. Even taking that into account, he was surprised anyone had family members who'd want to spend Christmas with them.

James' mother looked a lot like him; pale blond hair, slender but strong muscular build, and sparkling blue eyes. She was very pretty, and a bit young looking to have a nineteen year old son. Then again, Rachel Rathaway had had some problems conceiving and as a result had been a bit older than was normal when Piper was born, and so old when she'd carried his sister that she blamed her age on Jerrie's 'complications', so he did tend to be a bad judge about what was a good age for a mother. The fact remained that Mrs. Jesse looked more like a big sister than a parent to James though.

"Come here Jamey and give your mama a hug!" She jumped to her feet and enveloped her son in an awkward hug. James tentatively patted her back, looking awkward and confused. He mouthed something at Piper and threw an apologetic expression his way. Piper had no idea what he was trying to communicate, but he figured he should take the not-so-subtle hint.

"I guess, um, I guess I'll get going then. Since you already have company," Piper murmured.

"Yes, why don't you be on your way?" Mrs. Jesse agreed.

"Piper! No! C'mon, it's okay." James pulled away from his mother and darted over to Piper. "I have no idea what she's doing here, but I'll get rid of her as quick as I can, okay?" He hissed.

"I heard that!" Mrs. Jesse barked. James cringed.

"C'mon Ma, we haven't seen each other since the first time I got arrested! And unless I was just punchy from the way the Flash took me in, I thought I remembered hearing you say you wished I'd never been born!"

Mrs. Jesse pursed her lips. "Things were said that we both regret. You happy Giovanni? You're ruining Christmas! Again!"

"Giovanni?" Piper repeated.

And then the two started bickering in Italian and Piper was completely lost. He gaped at the two blondes, watched their speech get more and more heated as they started gesticulating wildly at each other, and he edged into the hallway to get his coat. James didn't notice him leave until the front door slammed.

"Are you happy you friggin' harpy?" James yelled, switching back to English. "It's not enough you and Dad traumatized me into the dysfunctional man-child I am today, now you drop in out of the blue to scare off the only guy I've ever cared about just when I was working up the guts to actually talk to him about it!"

"Oh, so Mr. Bigshot airplane robber's a sodomite to boot? Is that why you wear those silly fairy boots? Because you're a fairy?" Mrs. Jesse sneered.

"If you weren't my mother, I'd punch you in the face."

"Don't let that stop you."

"Ma, why are you really here?" James asked. He really hadn't seen her since he'd been arrested, and he didn't plan on seeing any of the Flying Jesses ever again. He wanted to leave his childhood behind as badly as any of the other Rogues, but like the rest of them, his past kept cropping up again.

"I'm here because your father and I got in trouble. I need cash, and you do owe me."

James scowled. "The act was going downhill even before I screwed up. You can't blame me for your money problems."

"I can and I will. Now cough up. You owe us."

"Fine." He'd pay her off just to be rid of her. "I'll give you whatever you need, but one condition. I don't ever want to see you again."

Mrs. Jesse strode forward and grabbed James' chin. She tilted his face so that he was looking down into her eyes. "Jamey, you were always my little angel. Was I really so bad to you?"

"You didn't protect me from Pop."

She let out a hard sigh and pulled away from him, hugging herself protectively. "No, I didn't, but who was going to protect me from him if I did? No one, that's who."

"And you still want to crawl back to him with my cash?"

"What else am I going to do?" She asked. "I'm not getting any younger you know. We take care of each other. That's what family does."

James went into the kitchen and grabbed his jacket from where he'd slung it over the back of a chair. He took out the envelope with the money he'd made from the Elmo dolls and gave it to his mother. "Here."

Helen Jesse's eyes widened when she opened it. "Jamey, I only needed a couple thousand."

"I don't care. Take it all, do whatever you need to do to help Dad, and then run away. That's the biggest score I've gotten in months. You should be able to start up a new life with that. Go somewhere where he doesn't beat the shit out of you anymore. I did, and it's working out alright for me."

"Giovanni…" She enveloped him in a big hug and kissed both his cheeks, tears in her eyes. "I don't deserve this."

"Well we're family."

"I'm sorry angel. I should have protected you. I should have-"

"Ma, stop. It's okay." Yes you damn well should have and no, it's not okay. " Just promise me you won't let him talk you into staying. Promise me, alright?" He gently shook her shoulders until she'd look him in the eye and say it. Helen kissed him again, and he walked her to the front door.

"Jamey…do you really never want to see me again?"

James considered. "I guess it wouldn't be so bad. You know, once in awhile. I'm in jail kind of a lot though, so follow the papers before you bother coming out here. Save yourself a trip, you know?"

She nodded. "Um, I know it's not my place to say anything about…about who you fall in love with, but that boy I saw you with just now-"

"Ma, please-"

"No, it's not that! It's just…he's very handsome Jamey. It's too bad he's not a girl."

James laughed. "I've been thinking that for months."

"Months?" She smiled at him. "You really like this boy?"

"Yeah Ma…I really do."

"Well then, I hope you picked better than I did. I love you angel."

"I love you too Ma. Merry Christmas." He hugged her again and watched her as she walked down the street.

Once she was out of sight, James went back inside, and was just starting to wonder if he should go looking for Piper when there was a knock on his door.

Piper was on his front stoop looking a little sheepish, but also very enticing with cheeks reddened from the snow and flurries clinging to his auburn hair. "James, um, I think I ought to confess something to you."

"What's that?" James asked.

Piper held back his hair and motioned to one of his ears. James leaned forward and for the first time noticed the bits of machinery in Piper's inner ear.

"I was born deaf. My parents got me experimental surgery that gave me super hearing."

"Oh. Well that must be useful," James said, impressed.

"It is. It's excellent for eavesdropping."

And the normally perceptive young man paled as something occurred to him. "You…you listened to the fight I just had? With my mom?"

Piper nodded. "I'd, er, noticed that you treat me differently…and I was wondering about you. I couldn't tell if…if you were worth investing myself in. Because you're so-"

"Obnoxious?"

"I was going to be nice about it. But yes, obnoxious does work. Anyway…" Piper took James' hand in his and twined their fingers. "What you did for your mother…do you really think she'll leave her abusive spouse?"

"I really hope so, but I tried to get her away from Dad a ton of times. I even hotwired a car when I was ten and threw all her clothes in the back, but I couldn't get her to come with me. I kinda gave up hoping I could save her."

"Well, I think it's incredible of you to try. I think there's a good person in you somewhere, and I want to get to know him."

"You do?"

Piper leaned in so that their noses were almost touching. "I really do."

Smiling like a jack ass, but thoroughly okay with that, James framed Piper's face in his hands and leaned in that extra little bit for a Christmas kiss.

The Rogues got together again on New Year's Eve for a party brimming with poor choices. Half of them were in jail in the morning, but no one seemed to mind. It's not like Iron Heights was that hard to break out of, after all.

It was the first time Len had seen Piper and James in the same place at the same time since before Christmas. He'd been wondering about those two kids, and the change in them was so subtle he almost missed it. But when they stood next to each other, their fingers would just barely brush together. They held each other's' gaze just a bit too long and smiled at each other just a bit too frequently.

And the next day, when James happened to be one of the Rogues sitting in Iron Heights one cell over from Len, he was busted out by his new boyfriend first thing in the morning. Len was more than happy to sneak out the hole in the wall after him and, after a moment's hesitation, the new lovebirds let him hitch a ride home.

The next poker night, when Piper went upstairs to grab another case of beer, Len pulled James aside. "So, you kids happy?"

James regarded him with some skepticism, but it only lasted a few seconds before he broke into a wide grin. "Yeah…he's pretty wonderful. Thanks for giving me that kick in the ass. I really needed it."

"Yep. Good. Keep him on our side as long as you can, alright?"

James shook his head. "I'm gonna do whatever I can to make him happy."

Len rolled his eyes and stalked back to the poker table, but once he was out of James' sight he cringed into a half-grin.

And upstairs, Piper was grinning as well.

END