Dobby's Crush
**A narrative by Dobby**
Dobby is sitting in the kitchen at Hogwarts, watching Winky, yes he is. Dobby is then thinking how pretty Winky's nose looks when she is not rubbing it tomato red, not that Dobby doesn't *like* Winky's nose tomato red! Dobby is loving to look at Winky! He even shirks his duties to watch her, yes he does, Sir or Miss!
*meanwhile...*
Ron is sitting at the table in the Gryffendor common room, yes he is! He just isn't able to stop thinking about her, no he isn't! He is just sitting and stareing into space, while Dobby's friends, Harry and Hermione try to make him talk, or stop saying 'I love her, I love her.' Dobby is not liking Ron anymore! Ron is liking Winky, and Dobby will have Winky, yes he will!
**real text**
Ron sighed for about the fourty-fifth time in five minutes, causing Harry and Hermione to stare at him again. "Whats wrong with you, for the seventeenth time?" Harry inquired. Hermione simply glared. "Isn't it obvious? He likes someone." "Oh" was Harry's reply. He stared at Ron. This wasn't like his friend at all. Who was he obsessing over, and why? Ron kept murmmering gibberish, until Hermione got close to him and listened for about a minute, then pulled away in disgust.
"What'd he say?" Harry looked half eager, and half scared.
"He said 'Oh, for the love of all house-elves, she, Winky, the most wonderful.' over and over, then he went into some censored stuff and Shakespear." Hermione shivered.
"Ron? I think you need to eat something. Ron?" Harry looked worried. Ron simply lifted his chin and stared at the ceiling. "Oh, Winky, my precious, I love would love to be in thy presence, on sweetest of the sweet, most beautiful of the beauties. Thy nose, though squashed, is the most wonderful one I have ever seen. Your eyes are like the stars in the heavens..." and on and on. Finally, Hermione stunned him and floated him down to the hospital wing, where she told Madame Pomfrey that he wa seriously ill, and she would find out how when he woke up.
Dobby sat in the kitchen, staring across the room at the back of another house-elf, wearing little skirt and cap. "Winky, Dobby is loving you and you is not even knowing that he does. Poor, poor Winky. Dobby will slay any competitors for your affection, even if he has to slay Harry Potter!"
Another elf, who had overheard Dobby, stared at him for a while, and then moved on, whispering something to the elf next to him, who backed away from Dobby.
That afternoon... the inevitable happened. Dobby was making the beds in the fifth year's dorm, when he heard Ron back in the common room. "I love her. Winky-" And Dobby listened no further. He stormed out of the room, purposely not making Ron's bed.
Dobby sat many long hours in the kitchen, doing nothing at all, but think of ways to kill Ron, the human he hated and despised so much. As he mentally ranted, the other house-elves giving him a wide birth, he realized that his 'Ron-Winky Problem' was actually very easy to solve. He, Dobby, would go and poison Ron, then save up his gold, and buy a ring for Winky so that she would be with him forever. What a ring did, he did not know, but it must be very powerful, for it kept two people together until one took it off. Maybe it brainwashed one. Yes, that was it! One was brainwashed, so the other could tell them, that before they were brainwashed, that the had be such good friends, and wanted to spend their lives together... Yes! That was how it worked! Now with a good, firm idea in his head, Dobby set out to accomplish his task.
**NEXT MORNING**
Ron, Harry, and Hermione all sat at the Gryffendor table, unaware, that underneathe it, Dobby was rubbing a poison on Ron's robe where it would rub against his skin and kill him. Walking off with satisfaction, Dobby went off to count his Galleons....
Disclaimer:: Yeah, yeah. the usual... Characters belong to J.K.R. and
the story line and general insanity is ALL MINE!!!!!!
**A narrative by Dobby**
Dobby is sitting in the kitchen at Hogwarts, watching Winky, yes he is. Dobby is then thinking how pretty Winky's nose looks when she is not rubbing it tomato red, not that Dobby doesn't *like* Winky's nose tomato red! Dobby is loving to look at Winky! He even shirks his duties to watch her, yes he does, Sir or Miss!
*meanwhile...*
Ron is sitting at the table in the Gryffendor common room, yes he is! He just isn't able to stop thinking about her, no he isn't! He is just sitting and stareing into space, while Dobby's friends, Harry and Hermione try to make him talk, or stop saying 'I love her, I love her.' Dobby is not liking Ron anymore! Ron is liking Winky, and Dobby will have Winky, yes he will!
**real text**
Ron sighed for about the fourty-fifth time in five minutes, causing Harry and Hermione to stare at him again. "Whats wrong with you, for the seventeenth time?" Harry inquired. Hermione simply glared. "Isn't it obvious? He likes someone." "Oh" was Harry's reply. He stared at Ron. This wasn't like his friend at all. Who was he obsessing over, and why? Ron kept murmmering gibberish, until Hermione got close to him and listened for about a minute, then pulled away in disgust.
"What'd he say?" Harry looked half eager, and half scared.
"He said 'Oh, for the love of all house-elves, she, Winky, the most wonderful.' over and over, then he went into some censored stuff and Shakespear." Hermione shivered.
"Ron? I think you need to eat something. Ron?" Harry looked worried. Ron simply lifted his chin and stared at the ceiling. "Oh, Winky, my precious, I love would love to be in thy presence, on sweetest of the sweet, most beautiful of the beauties. Thy nose, though squashed, is the most wonderful one I have ever seen. Your eyes are like the stars in the heavens..." and on and on. Finally, Hermione stunned him and floated him down to the hospital wing, where she told Madame Pomfrey that he wa seriously ill, and she would find out how when he woke up.
Dobby sat in the kitchen, staring across the room at the back of another house-elf, wearing little skirt and cap. "Winky, Dobby is loving you and you is not even knowing that he does. Poor, poor Winky. Dobby will slay any competitors for your affection, even if he has to slay Harry Potter!"
Another elf, who had overheard Dobby, stared at him for a while, and then moved on, whispering something to the elf next to him, who backed away from Dobby.
That afternoon... the inevitable happened. Dobby was making the beds in the fifth year's dorm, when he heard Ron back in the common room. "I love her. Winky-" And Dobby listened no further. He stormed out of the room, purposely not making Ron's bed.
Dobby sat many long hours in the kitchen, doing nothing at all, but think of ways to kill Ron, the human he hated and despised so much. As he mentally ranted, the other house-elves giving him a wide birth, he realized that his 'Ron-Winky Problem' was actually very easy to solve. He, Dobby, would go and poison Ron, then save up his gold, and buy a ring for Winky so that she would be with him forever. What a ring did, he did not know, but it must be very powerful, for it kept two people together until one took it off. Maybe it brainwashed one. Yes, that was it! One was brainwashed, so the other could tell them, that before they were brainwashed, that the had be such good friends, and wanted to spend their lives together... Yes! That was how it worked! Now with a good, firm idea in his head, Dobby set out to accomplish his task.
**NEXT MORNING**
Ron, Harry, and Hermione all sat at the Gryffendor table, unaware, that underneathe it, Dobby was rubbing a poison on Ron's robe where it would rub against his skin and kill him. Walking off with satisfaction, Dobby went off to count his Galleons....
Disclaimer:: Yeah, yeah. the usual... Characters belong to J.K.R. and
the story line and general insanity is ALL MINE!!!!!!