Author's Note: This is a short drabble/one-short for gags.
Make-up and Ketchup
Young five years old Uchiha Sasuke sat on his dark blue bed in his room, sulking. The boy's black eyes traveled from one of the corner of the room to another while sustaining a thinking position. It was quite obvious to many people that Sasuke loved and respected his brother more than any other member of the family.
But of course, Sasuke also loved bothering him most of the time. That was something he learned from Shisui one day when he heard him and his brother talk. The more you annoy a person the more you show them you like them. Sadly, Sasuke never understood the true meaning of the phrase, the truth being that Shisui often ran after the village's kunoichis by annoying them in one way or another.
Sasuke's form slumped over the bed again. How was he going to prove to his brother that he admired him and respected him? Despite his young age, Sasuke wasn't stupid. He knew that 'flattery will get you everywhere' especially him, since he wanted to learn an awesome fire technique and who better to teach him that Itachi himself?
Problem was that he never realized he was applying the wrong plan. By annoying and bothering Itachi, Sasuke thought that he proved he admired him and somehow, his brother would teach him a fire jutsu. That is why Sasuke made a plan.
Every morning, he would go up to his brother's room and yell, scream, or cause any sort of disturbance to the room's silence to wake up his brother. Despite his usual quarrels with his father, Itachi loved sleeping more than anything else. Maybe it was because of his tiring missions the other day or just because it was actually quiet in his room, Sasuke never knew.
But whenever he would enter the room and yell for more than a few seconds, his brother would throw a shuriken at him. It was already a custom welcome for the five year old to duck or move out of its way. Every morning, Sasuke always jumped out of its trajectory. Either Itachi just wanted to scare him or he was too fast.
But Sasuke never gave up, he would always come back the next day and wake up his brother in the most agonizing ways possible. Sadly, for the past month, Itachi never woke up and most likely threw the weapon out of custom.
However, his brother never seemed to notice his attempts at proving he admired him. Maybe he wasn't very important to him? Or just seen as a small annoyance? The young by had to find out quickly or else his efforts were in vain.
A small grin spread across his face in the dark room as his eyes glittered slyly. He just came up with the best plan ever to find out. Now if only he could reach the top shelf in the kitchen…
The rooster never sang in the Uchiha compound. It was a law. For years, the bird woke up most of the members by announcing the start of the day but ever since ten years old Uchiha Itachi became chuunin, the word 'silence' entered the bird's vocabulary.
The black haired boy was currently lying in bed, his soft skin brushing against the pillow and his eyes tried to remain closed. Yet, he couldn't help the dread feeling in his stomach that his younger brother would barge in his room any moment now trying to wake him up.
No matter, Itachi was always prepared. His hand brushed against the cold metal of a shuriken hidden under his pillow, as a smirk crept upon his face.
Slowly, he began counting in his mind…
5…
4…
3…
2…
1…
"NII-SAN! WAKE UP!" a small voice yelled, as the door opened forcefully and banged against the wall. Itachi didn't wait for another moment. He threw the shuriken at the small figure, not bothering to look up at the boy. Sasuke was too fast for it as usual.
Strange, his ears perked up when he didn't head the usual clack the shuriken made when it met the wall. Surely Sasuke dodged it? He wasn't an Uchiha for nothing…
"Itachi-niisan…" a small defeated voice echoed in the room like its owner was dieing.
Itachi's face because white as a sheet. He immediately sprung up and looked around the now sunny room, his eyes falling on a small figure against the wall, covered in red liquid.
"Sasuke!" Itachi yelled and jumped over at the small boy. His hand immediately touched the red liquid on his brother's clothing right on his heart. The shuriken was forgotten next to the young boy, covered in the same liquid. The young boy's face was pale as a sheet as as his breath hardened.
The preteen quickly lifted his younger brother's figure and ran out the window to his room towards the hospital, panic written across his face. His mom would kill him if she ever found out how he greeted his brother in the morning and if Sasuke didn't survive…Oh Kami…
Itachi ran on the rooftops like there was no tomorrow, muttering soothing words towards the boy: "Whatever you do, stay far away from the light, don't go near it, DO YOU HEAR ME SASUKE! Stay away from the light!"
If Sasuke wasn't pretending to die, he would be chocking on laughter on his brother's paranoid behavior.
It was only a few moments later the two reached the Konoha Hospital. Itachi grabbed by the neck the first doctor he found. "My brother, blood, die, stop!" he said in a panic. The doctor's eyes went to the young boy in his arms. He lifted him up to take a closer look at him.
By now, a small crowd gathered around the three to see what was happening.
The doctor quickly called a nurse and took Sasuke away to the operation room, leaving the preteen trembling and walking from one side of the room to another for the next minutes.
It wasn't long until the doctor came out of the room laughing and holding Sasuke's hand while the young boy grinned.
Itachi broke out of his nervous state when his eyes fell on his brother, his whole body froze.t?
"Uchiha-san, your brother is alright he was on-" but the doctor never finished his phrase because Itachi dove at Sasuke and hugged the young boy.
"Sasuke, I'm so sorry, please don't tell mom about it, I promise I'll teach you any jutsu you want and even play Tea with that Haruno and Yamanaka girl next time! Just don't tell mom!"
Sasuke was having trouble breathing as his brother continued to choke him. The doctor laughed some more.
"It's alright Tachi-niisan I won't tell mom if you don't tell her I used all the ketchup." The young boy grinned before realized his mistake.
Itachi blinked. "What ketchup?"
Sasuke turned pale for a moment and spluttered his words "N-no ketchup, mistake, aha, sure, won't tell mom, joking!" he grinned.
The older brother gave the boy a dark look: "Sasuke-kun, are you hiding something from me?"
Uh-oh, 'kun' suffix added.
Sasuke shook his head violently, making his brother even more suspicious. That was when they noticed the spot made from the red liquid on the boy's pajamas. Itachi touched the spot with his index finger and lifted it up to his nose. "Sasuke, this is ketchup. What is ketchup doing on your clothes where the blood was supposed to be?"
Sasuke frowned and managed to squirm out of his brother's grasp and scratch the back of his head. "Is that promise still available?" Sasuke grinned as his brother stood up, glaring at him.
"Well, I wanted you to teach me a new katon jutsu and I thought that maybe if I bothered you, you'd notice me but you always slept in when I come in your room and you always threw that starry thing at me and I was sick of it and wanted to teach you a lesson…So I used mom's face powder and the ketchup from the kitchen…" Sasuke said, looking up at his brother.
Never in his life did the preteen feel more of a fool. He was tricked by his younger brother and half of the village was probably talking about him, walking in a hospital carrying his brother with a fake wound he got from a shuriken he threw and the fact that he was still in his black pajamas.
His left eye twitched and his knuckles turned white. "Sasuke-kun, how about we have a little talk." he said in the sweetest voice possible.
Sasuke took a few steps backwards towards the hospital exit and scratched the back of his head. "It's okay Tachi-niisan, I forgive you for throwing that starry thing at me! Now, if you don't mind, you have a tea party to attend!" the boy ran out the door at high speed, his older brother following closely screaming different profanities.
Epilogue:
The news about what happened that day traveled all across the village, even outside of it. People were amused of the small boy's attics and his sly attitude. A certain organization even had a look out for the two.
In the end, Uchiha Mikoto did find out about Itachi's little stunt in the morning and made sure to punish both boys. Itachi was forced to follow his promise for a month by attending tea parties with Ino and Sakura, sometimes even the Hokage joined in, much to the boy's dismay.
Sasuke, despite his punishment of 'time-out' in the corner and promise never to use her make-up again, was quite happy. His brother taught him a new jutsu for his level and even congratulated him on doing it right. But Sasuke never found out if he truly ment it or was it because Mikoto was right behind him with holding a rod and glaring at the preteen.
The End