Confession

Part I: Reassurance

Clark was straightening out his tie when he heard a knock on his door. He had a few minutes until he had to be at work, but he needed to do something first. He answered the door and found Chloe standing on the other side of it.

"Hey," he welcomed her.

"Hi." She stepped inside, a worried expression on her face. "What's the emergency?"

He had asked Chloe to drop by before work, and as he closed the door and joined her in the living room, he inquired, "Have you talked to Lois, yet? About our date last night?"

"Uhhh…no. But I'm picking her up for lunch later." She smiled mischievously. "Why? Worried she might spill too many juicy details?"

"No," Clark said simply. He strode past her, and the expression on his face informed hers so that she turned serious again.

"Clark, what happened?" she asked.

Clark was in deep thought, replaying in his mind the night's events. The dance on the balcony. The kiss. The hovering. He looked at Chloe and explained slowly. "Last night, as Lois and I were kissing…we were sort of – floating on air," he finally managed to confess.

At Clark's words, Chloe's apprehensive expression swiftly changed into a relieved and then teasing one. "Awww! Clark, that's supposed to happen. When you kiss someone you have deep feelings for, you're supposed to feel like you're on Cloud Nine."

"We didn't exactly make it to Cloud Nine, Chloe. It was more like three or four inches off the ground," Clark explained.

Again, Chloe's expression changed, her forehead scrunched up in sudden realization. "Wait? What? You mean, you were floating literally?" Clark simply nodded and went to sit on the couch. Chloe, blinking in the situation, followed him but didn't sit down. "Did Lois notice?"

"No. At least, I don't think so. I distracted her until we were back on solid ground."

"Oh, my God." It was all Chloe could say in response. She instinctively took a seat next to Clark, and after a moment, she turned to him and eager expression her face. "Do you know what this means?" Off Clark's frown, she answered for him, "It means you can fly!"

Clark practically shot off the couch and held out a hand in protest. "Whoa, hold on there, Chloe. I hovered."

Chloe stood up also and replied, "Yeah, but you've never done that before. Think about it - Kara can fly, Kal can fly. And now you've floated. That means you can probably fly, too. Have you tried?"

Clark looked away and said quietly. "I haven't exactly been able to do it again since last night."

Chloe's mouth broke into a beam. "Awww! That is so romantic!"

Clark blinked in surprise. "What is?"

"Well, you floated kissing Lois, and you haven't been able to since you stopped. Maybe if you kiss her again - "

Clark walked away from Chloe, sensing her teasing tone. "Now you're not being serious." He grabbed his jacket from the staircase banister and put it on.

Chloe followed him. "You're right. I'm sorry. I was just teasing." When Clark didn't make any further movements to leave, she continued, "I was just thinking how sweet it is that of all the times to float off the ground, it's when you're kissing my cousin."

"It isn't sweet, Chloe." Clark sat back down on the couch. "It's inconvenient." He sighed, and after a pause, during which Chloe simply waited for him to continue, the truth poured out of him. "Last night, for the first time in a long time, I didn't think about my secret, about my powers. I was just Clark Kent. But then when I looked down and saw our feet no longer on the ground where they should have been, I was reminded of all of it. And when I came home, I couldn't sleep just thinking about it, and I realized what I had to do." He looked at Chloe, who, judging from the expression on her face, knew exactly what Clark meant. "I have to tell her," he said aloud. "I want to tell her."

Chloe, nodding, replied, "Good." She took her seat next to him.

"You don't think it's a terrible idea?"

"No. It's Lois. She'll be surprised, but knowing her, she'll probably think it's really cool. Who wouldn't want to know someone with superpowers?"

"Yeah, maybe a year ago she would have thought it was cool - when it was just her dorky, farm boy Smallville. But now – when it's her – Metropolis, Daily Planet partner – boyfriend?" Clark thought.

At the sound of the word "boyfriend," Chloe couldn't help but laugh. Clark glared at her. "What's so funny?" he demanded.

"Boyfriend? Really?" she teased him. "Aren't we jumping the gun a little here, Clark. Last night was only your first date."

Clark laughed. He hadn't realized that he had referred to himself as Lois' boyfriend. It did sound a bit juvenile, but at the same time, he felt proud of it. "You know what I mean, Chloe. It's one thing to know that your friend is an alien. It's a little different when it's someone you might - " He stopped, not exactly sure how to finish the statement.

"Spend the rest of your life with?" Chloe finished for him.

Clark stoop up and distanced himself from her. "Now who's jumping the gun?"

"Whatever. Like you don't think about it." Chloe smiled sympathetically and stepped towards him. "Look, Clark, I'm going to tell you a little something about my cousin that you might already be aware of. Lois doesn't love easily, and she's not exactly easy to love. She's rough around the edges, and by the time you get past that, you're pretty bruised and battered. But once you do, you have a fiercely loyal friend for life. You went beyond passing those edges, Clark. You got her. She is completely head over heels for you, so this secret of yours, she'll be able to handle. She's not going to stop loving you because of it."

Clark grinned, because even though he had heard Lois say that she loved him (albeit thinking he couldn't hear her) - and even though he didn't really need to hear her say it because he felt it every time she looked at him - the idea of Lois Lane loving him was still so new, so unexpected that discovering that other people knew it also made Clark swell with an astonished gratitude.

His face turned sober again when he responded, "That's not what I'm worried about, Chloe. I'm sure Lois won't stop loving me when she finds out the truth, just as I'm sure there's nothing she could tell me that would make me stop - ." He stopped short and decided to continue on a different route. "I've seen Lois love. She doesn't do it half way. With her, there are no conditions. But if there's one thing I've learned, it's that loving someone and being with them can be two very different things. She loved Oliver, but she broke it off because she couldn't handle his dual identity. How do I know that this time will be different?"

Unexpectedly, Chloe smacked the back of Clark's head. If he didn't have super strength, he would have been in mild pain. "Because you're not Oliver, you dork."

Clark reached over and rubbed the back of his head. "Was that really necessary?"

"Get over it. It didn't hurt," she replied, crossing her arms.

Clark couldn't argue, so he turned his attention to the situation at hand and said, "Chloe, I've made the decision to tell her. I didn't ask you over here to convince me one way or another. I just wanted to hear you say that it'll be okay, that there's still a good chance that I won't lose her. Because I can't. I can't lose her. Not when I've just realized how much I – how much I love her." It was the first time he'd ever revealed this truth to anyone, though there were times, especially when he was with Lois, that he wanted nothing more than to shout it to the world.

Chloe placed her hands on Clark's shoulders, as if trying to steady him. "You won't lose her, Clark. The way I see it, what happened between her and Oliver is pretty much what happened between you and Lana." Clark looked at her, a bewildered look on his face. "The circumstances were different, but the intentions were the same. Lana left you because she knew you had bigger responsibilities. Lois left Oliver for the same reason. But the bottom line is, Clark, that if Oliver had been enough for Lois, and if you, no offense, had been enough for Lana, everything would have been fine and dandy, but they weren't. My point is that part of the reason why that relationship didn't work was not that she couldn't handle the dual identity. It was that he was the wrong guy for her. I mean, you didn't see her running back into his arms when he gave up the Green Arrow stint for awhile, did you? She could have, but she didn't, and that had everything to do with you. Because you're the right guy. And if you're worried for one second that Lois is going to pull a Lana, then you just exorcise that thought out of your head, buddy, because Lana Lang has nothing on my cousin." She smiled and let her hands fall back to her sides. After a beat, she added more seriously, "I saw you when Lana was around. I was afraid you'd go all googly-eyed on her for the billionth time, and for a minute there, I thought you would. Imagine my surprise, when you told me that you didn't love her anymore, that you realized she wasn't the one. Having been front and center on the roller coaster that was your relationship, I never thought I would live to see that day. And at first I thought it was simply because you'd changed, because you finally decided to grow a brain when it came to Lana and realize that she was the wrong girl for you. But then I saw how you looked at Lois when you brought her to see me at the hospital, and it all made sense. You falling in love with Lois Lane? Lana didn't stand a chance."

Clark smiled. He wasn't about to argue with the truth.

Part II: Telling Lois – Two Weeks Later

Lois was practically bouncing up to the Kent's porch and was poised to knock on the front door when Clark abruptly opened it. At the sight of each other, they both beamed.

"Hi!" Lois greeted him.

"Hi," Clark replied. Clark held the door open as Lois strode in.

As she passed him, she offered him a quick peck on the cheek and smiled shyly. "Gotta get used to that."

Clark closed the door behind them. He didn't know if he would ever get used to that. He and Lois had been dating now for a couple of weeks, and every time he went to her apartment to pick her up for a date or she went to the farm to meet him for one, as she was doing now, they had greeted each other with a kiss – sometimes on the cheek, other times, softly on the lips. But each time, Clark felt the butterflies practically rumbling in his stomach.

Today, they were especially lively, because today was the day he resolved to tell Lois Lane his secret.

"Ready to go, Smallville?" Lois asked as she entered the house. "I haven't been to a fair in years, but I've got my allergy pills and nasal spray, so I'm good to go."

Clark smiled softly at her, and it didn't take Lois long to read into his grave expression. "What's wrong?" she asked.

"I – uh – we need to talk, Lois," Clark stammered.

Lois' face fell. "Okay – that can't be good."

Clark led her into the living room and sat down on the couch. Lois watched him for a moment as if trying to ascertain just by his looks what he could possibly say to her. Was he breaking things off? No! No way! I'll kill him! It couldn't be that. There hasn't been any indication that he's cooled off. A barrage of thoughts enveloped Lois' brain, and she refused to sit down next to him. She assumed a defensive stance – her arms crossed, her body stiffened. Whatever it was Clark Kent was going to tell her, she was not going to allow him to hurt her, not again. But as he looked up at her with the warmth of his blue eyes, she unconsciously let down her guard. Who was she kidding? Guarding her feelings from Clark was as futile as baking a perfectly edible rum cake.

With that one gaze, her body softened, and she slowly sat next to him. "What is it, Clark?" she asked, not looking at him.

Clark had rehearsed this moment a million times in his head (and sometimes aloud, his reflection in the mirror standing in for Lois), but when the words finally came out of his mouth, he found that they were nothing of what he had practiced. "Lois, do you remember all those times that I would – kind of – just disappear on you? You'd wonder where I ran off to, and I always gave you some lame excuse?" Lois simply nodded, so he continued. "Well, the thing is – I was busy helping people who were in trouble."

"That's great, Clark, but I know that," Lois managed to reply. "What's the big deal?"

"Well, the reason why you never saw me leave, or why I needed to speed out of there without saying anything to you – well – it's just…" Clark gulped. "Lois, I'm not from here."

Lois raised an eyebrow. "Not from where? Smallville?"

"No – I mean, yes – I was raised here, but I'm not from here. I'm not from – Earth."

Lois held her confused look only for a second before her lips gradually formed a smile. "What?" she laughed. "You're not from the planet Earth? Clark, listen, I always had my suspicions that you were – different – but really?"

Clark tightened his jaw. Apparently, words were not going to do it. So he stood up and walked over to the front door, Lois watching him. "Where are you going?" She saw him open the door and disappear onto the porch. Lois rolled her eyes. Great, I hurt his feelings, she thought, as she stood up to follow him.

But when she reached the door that Clark had just walked through, she found that he was already at the other end of the farm, standing next to the tractor. He was surveying his surroundings, as if looking out for something. "How'd you get over there so fast?" she called after him.

"I super sped," Clark called back.

"What?" Lois yelled. She stepped onto the middle of the porch and crossed her arms.

"I'm really fast, and I'm really strong." And he demonstrated the latter by lifting the tractor with one arm.

Lois' eyes grew wide. She watched Clark set the tractor back down gently, and before she could say another word, a red and blue blur swooshed towards her, and she suddenly found Clark standing in front of her. Lois unconsciously took a step back, shocked by his abrupt appearance. "Holy cow."

The corners of Clark's eyes crinkled with worry. He knew that there were no words he could say to lessen the shock of his revelation, so he waited for Lois to break the silence.

But she didn't say anything. Instead, she turned and walked back into the house. Clark took a deep breath before following her inside.

He closed the door behind them again, and this time, she was the first one to sit down on the couch. "So you're not from Earth. Where are you from?" Lois asked him shortly after she sat down.

"I'm from a planet called Krypton," Clark said carefully. He took a seat on the chair perpendicular to the couch.

"Krypton," Lois repeated.

"It doesn't exist anymore. It exploded."

"What? So how did you - "

"My parents – from Krypton – they sent me here, on a spaceship."

"Like a spaceship, spaceship?" Lois asked. The investigative reporter's curiosity was piqued, and she almost forgot that it was Clark Kent who was telling her that he was a bona fide alien.

"Yes," Clark answered.

"And Mr. and Mrs. Kent?"

"They found me when my spaceship crashed in Miller's Field."

Lois looked away and swallowed. Her throat was dry, but she continued. "So, um, you're not – human?"

Clark shook his head. "No."

Lois nodded, stood up, and turned her back to him. "When did you find out?"

"When I was a kid. I never got sick, and I never got hurt," Clark explained.

"Well, don't worry, you didn't miss much," Lois said, attempting to joke, but she knew it sounded forced. "What else can you do?" she asked.

"Um, I have super hearing and X-ray vision."

She turned to him, impressed. She couldn't really help herself. "Really? That explains a lot."

"What do you mean?"

"Well, you always seem to find out things before I do," Lois told him. Suddenly, her face changed, a realization suddenly forming in her head. "Wait a minute – you're the good Samaritan, aren't you? The red and blue blur." She smiled a smile of genuine admiration. "You're Metropolis' secret hero." When Clark glanced down modestly in response, Lois continued, "But you were a hero here way before that, weren't you?" She went to him now and lowered herself down to his eye-level. "Clark, you must have saved me a million times. To think all that time when I couldn't explain how I escaped with my life. It was you." She smiled gratefully at him. "Why didn't you tell me before?"

"I didn't think you had to know. I didn't think anyone had to know. I thought that if I told people I cared about, I would be putting them in danger," Clark told her.

"Well, does anyone else know?"

"Besides my mom," Clark thought. "Lana knows."

"How'd she take it when you told her?" Lois asked, genuinely curious. There was no tinge of jealous in her voice.

"Pretty well, I guess. But it was one of the things that got in the way. Not because I told her but because I didn't for a long time. Too many secrets from both sides," Clark explained, and there was no tinge of regret in his voice.

"Who else?"

"Chloe."

"Chloe!" Lois stood up and started to pace around the room. "Of course she knows!" she exclaimed as if she was finally seeing a puzzle she'd been trying to put together for years. "You and her were always off investigating one thing or another."

"Well, I wasn't the one who told her," Clark started. Lois looked at him, waiting for an explanation. "She found out when she saw me using one of my powers. She didn't tell me she knew until much later." Clark took a deep breath. "And then after what happened to her, I sort of erased her memory."

"What?"

"Just the part about her knowing my secret."

"Why?"

"Because I thought it would be best," Clark said. "She knows again now. Her memories were restored when I found her." He stood up and walked over to Lois. "I just didn't want to burden anyone who, I thought, didn't have to know."

"So why are you telling me?"

"You know why, Lois," Clark said gently, placing a hand on her shoulder. "I wanted to be fair to you. I watched your heart break over Oliver, and I don't want to be the reason why - "

But she didn't give him a chance to finish. Taking a step back, she demanded, "What? What does Oliver have to do with this?" Reading Clark's face, Lois made the correct assumption. "He knows, and you know that he's…" She didn't finish her own sentence, and instead turned from him again, her eyes shifting as if she were connecting seemingly disparate dots. "It was you I kissed that night, wasn't it?" She turned to him, her arms crossed. This was not a good sign.

Clark simply nodded and took a step into the gap Lois' had created between them, but she responded by taking one step back.

"That must have been a good laugh," Lois said bitterly.

Clark blinked in shocked. He had not predicted this reaction. "What? No, Lois, it wasn't like that."

She narrowed her eyes at him. "That hallucination you said I had? Finding Kara – was all of that real?" She saw Clark's jaw stiffen, and it was all she needed. "Wow! How naïve was I? You told me I passed out, and I believed you. That must have been nice, making a fool out of Lois Lane."

"Lois, I could never make a fool out of you," Clark replied. "I care about you, and I respect you - "

"Respect me?" she cut him off. "Tell me something, Clark, whenever you tried to explain some phenomenon I experienced, and I bought it, did you think, 'God, that Lois sure has blinders on. I bet I could pull one over on her any time'? Well, let me tell you something, mister, the only reason why I believed every word you said, even despite my doubts about its legitimacy, is that I respected you!" She took a deep breath, and in a more steady voice, added, "I trusted you, and so I would have believed pretty much anything you told me. I guess that was naïve."

Lois stormed past him, heading for the door. "Lois!" Clark called after her, and he was grateful when she stopped and turned to him, unsmiling. "Lois," he started again, more gently, "I'm sorry I didn't tell you before."

"Give me a little credit, Clark," Lois responded. "I'm not upset because you didn't tell me sooner. It's your secret. It was your decision." She paused, her hand on the doorknob. "I just – I'm kicking myself for all those times that I should have known, and I didn't put it together. And the idea that maybe – you were laughing at me behind my back…" she trailed off.

"God, Lois, I never…" Clark started, but he sensed that there was nothing he could say that would suddenly make Lois feel safe again.

Her back was turned to him again, and she leaned her forehead on the door. "Why did you have to tell me today?" she asked, almost inaudibly. "I woke up this morning thinking it was going to be a perfect day, and now it's the complete opposite."

"Lois, I couldn't go on another day without telling you. I wanted to be fair - "

She turned abruptly to him, her eyes ablaze, "Fair? What's fair about this?"

Clark was forced to step back, but he didn't back down. "You think this was easy for me? This was the hardest thing I've ever had to do."

"I doubt that," Lois retorted. "You couldn't have waited? I was going to ride the Ferris wheel for the first time since I was a kid and have funnel cake and cotton candy!"

Clark raised his eyebrows. Only Lois would have the audacity to tell him that he should have waited to reveal his greatest secret to the woman he loved because of cotton candy. "And when would have been the best time?" Clark asked her. When she didn't answer, he continued, more seriously, deliberately, "I've been wanting to tell you for weeks, Lois. Everything's been so wonderful, but every moment that passed, there was this increasing dread. I knew that if we were going to have any kind of future together, you should know everything about me." Clark stepped towards her, his eyes never leaving hers. He placed a hand on her cheek and said the words he had been longing to say, "I love you. I'm not sure when I started to, but once I realized it, there was nothing I could do to deny it. And there is nothing I want more than to be with you. If I could, I'd keep you with me always. But that's a power I don't have." No, it's all yours, Lois, he added silently to himself.

The tears in Lois' eyes had threatened to roll off her blushing cheeks, and as Clark finished speaking, she had furiously wiped away the first wave. He loved her. She knew it, but this was the first time he'd ever said it out loud to her. She didn't expect it to feel as powerful as it did; she had no idea that, spoken in Clark's familiar, warm voice, the words would carry so much meaning and cause her heart to flutter. Never in her wildest dreams (okay maybe in her wildest dreams) did she ever imagine Clark Kent saying he loved her. She never thought that she could deserve such love from such a human being. Oh, wait, he's not human, remember? But he was, in more ways than the majority of people she had encountered in her lifetime. Yet, he was above that. He was - more. And he loved her. He loved her. She considered herself a pretty good catch, but Clark Kent, super being? Now who was out of whose league?

"That's so not fair," Lois managed to say.

Clark, having no idea what she was thinking, took his hand away from her cheek. "I was trying to be fair - to give you a chance to walk away before you got too involved, too invested."

Lois let out a laugh. "Too involved? Too invested," she repeated, shaking her head. He really was dense sometimes. "Too late, Smallville."

And with that, Lois turned on her heels, opened the door, and walked speedily to her car.

Clark stood at the doorway and watched Lois Lane drive away, leaving a cloud of dust in her wake.