The Last Night
Though it was night, the woods were anything but silent. The old pine trees creaked slowly in the weak wind that gently swayed them back and forth. The snow misted slowly down as the scavenging squirrels ran for cover from the settling cold. It was a chill that froze bones, and even as the animals in the park stored themselves away, a deep fear resided in their hearts. It was a cold that many would not survive. In the morn, they knew that many would fade from the familiar landscape, never to be seen again. Suddenly, the forest quieted in anticipation. Something was coming...
Peter Pettigrew stumbled through the undergrowth, twigs breaking underneath his heavy footfalls as he panted, lost for breath. He was a man just entering his prime, his childhood huskiness finally leaving his body and granting him a slightly sculpted frame. His rich brown hair waved around his pale face as the slight wind rocked him. His watery blue eyes held no vibrancy, however, just confusion and fright.
He fell hard as the wet leaves slid out from under his feet. He crashed into the ground, and his wand bounced out of his grasp. "Noo... ," he moaned, grasping his injured ankle. He lay there, writhing in pain, as something in the woods broke through the trees behind him. Panic overtook him, and ignoring his swelling ankle, he writhed through the leaves, reaching out for his wand. He stood unsteadily and hobbled off into the forest. He vaguely considering becoming a rat, but he knew that if his ankle was broken, the effort of transforming could leave him permanently disfigured. Besides, it wasn't a certainty that he could manage the transformation anyways, and it would leave him without a wand, utterly defenseless.
He mumbled incoherently, trying to recall the spell that Remus had taught him. The sounds behind him grew louder, and he gasped, faltering. But courage and love swelled in his heart and he found a new strength. His pace redoubled, and he finally dove into a hollow tree, gasping for breath. The Message Spell finally came to him, and he whispered "Delivera!". He wand sparked, and he swore quietly. He tried again, and the small blue light flickered and died as soon as it left his wand. More crashing and a few loud swears came from Peter's left, and he held his breath in fright. Three tall men stumbled out of the forest, looking carefully around the clearing as Peter attempted the spell for a third time. The fear they embedded in him worked, and he sent a tiny speck of blue light out into the forest. The Death Eaters did not see the light, however, for they were busy arguing.
"Can't hear him anymore. He's hidden, or apparated. We ought to blast the damn woods apart," said one of men.
The one in the lead spun on him, "No! We have our orders. He is not to be... mishandled. Besides, that dolt can't even transfigure a teapot. If he's apparated, we'll be finding his head 'round the next bend.' "
Peter sat transfixed in his hiding spot. The three men before him were all cloaked in black, their faces hidden from the light. Their identities, however, were not concealed. Even the most junior of wizards could have recognized them. They were on the front cover of the Daily Prophet every morning, and their very names inspired terror. For they were Death Eaters, and they were after Peter. They'd found him taking a midnight walk in the park and chased him down. "Hurry, Remus." he whispered as they spread out and started their search, "Hurry."
A hundred miles away, Remus Lupin awoke with a start. A small blue light prodded him insistently, and he sighed. "Poor Peter. Will he never get the hang of this spell?" he muttered to himself, reaching for his wand. He poked the blue light gently, though he knew that words would probably be too much to expect. In its true form, the small light was to reveal a replica of the sender's face, which delivered a message. Peter, however, simply could not master it. Not that that was unusual, for Peter had trouble with the simplest of spells. The blue light warmed when Lupin's wand touched it, and it exhaled a squeaky breath. "Help!" it cried feebly as it flickered and went out. Lupin reached out for his wizarding robes. It was going to be a long night.
A few minutes later he was dressed and ready to depart. He mumbled a few quick words and apparated in Sirius Black's living room.
"Merlin's beard!" yelled Sirius, diving behind his couch.
Lupin sighed again, "It's only me, Padfoot."
Sirius stood quickly, and dusted himself off. "Do you have any idea what time it is? You're goddamn rude, you are. Apparating into my living room at two in the morning? I could have killed you!"
"As you dove behind your couch, crying out like a small child--" replied Lupin dryly.
"It was a war cry!" countered Sirius. "I have weapons back there, you know!"
Lupin took a quick glance behind the couch. "A cockroach cluster and a feather duster. Now I'm really frightened."
Sirius stretched his arms out, and his back cracked loudly, causing Lupin to wince. "Oh, shut your face. What do you want, anyways?" His face held a shrewd, suspicious look. "Something wrong?"
"Yes, actually. I just received a message from Peter. Something's not right."
Sirius rolled his eyes. "You woke me up for THAT? Oh, for crying out loud. I really should have killed you." He seemed to be forcing a light tone with his sarcasm but the skepticism in his eyes didn't fade.
Noticing this, Lupin's eyes lit up slightly. "No, its for real this time. He sent me a message spell."
Sirius laughed despite himself. "Good joke. What did it do, quack at you? Or did it just wake you up and float away?"
"Sirius...," said Lupin warningly, and Sirius shut up. "There is something wrong. The message squeaked 'help!' before it faded out. He's never been able to do that before. Something's scared him."
Sirius yawned, his face hardening as he truly began to wake up. "Why are you so insistent about this? What do you want with Peter, anyways?"
Finally realizing that the skepticism was not about Peter's cry for help, but about his validity, Lupin threw his hands up in anger, "What is that supposed to mean?"
"I think you already know what I mean, Remus."
"You bastard! What else do I have to do to prove to you that it wasn't me? I had nothing to do with it! Dumbledore believes me. Why won't you?"
"Dumbledore is a trusting dolt sometimes. I don't believe you, Remus. Caradoc Dearborn was with YOU when he vanished. Another comrade of ours gone, and its your fault. What about that time with Lily? I saw you, and on my honor, I never said anything to James, but I can't, I won't, forget it. You betrayed James, Remus. And you forced Lily to betray him too when you kissed her. Now Dumbledore knows that one of the Marauders is feeding Voldemort information. How can I not suspect you? I can't trust you anymore." Sirius' face was sorrowful for a moment before the bitterness overtook it, "For all I know, you're calling you dear little Death Eater friends right now." Lupin stood before him, his anger overcoming all his other emotions. He opened his mouth to speak, but Sirius cut him off. "If you're just going to stand there and rage at me, I suggest you leave. My bed is calling."
Lupin glared at Sirius, "Caradoc had already left my house. I had nothing to do with it, I swear to you. And Lily...it was a mistake. A stupid boyish mistake."
Sirius advanced on him, "Well, your swear isn't worth shit here. Leave."
"And what of Peter? I know there's something wrong. I can feel it. Will you just abandon him, Sirius? He is our friend."
"Well seeing as you'd probably just like to kill him, I wouldn't use the term 'friend' so loosely. I'm sure it's nothing. A bird probably flew into his window and he pissed his pants. Poor stupid arse..." his voice faded out, leaving Lupin to wonder who he was referring to.
"Goddamn you, Sirius!" yelled Lupin as he slammed the nearest thing to him, a transfiguration book, onto the floor. "I'm sick of your excuses about why you shouldn't believe me. I'm going to find him, even if I have to do it alone."
Sirius waved him off, and Lupin dissapparated with an angry bang. Sirius shook his head, and yawning, reached for his wand. A tiny brown owl greeted him and dropped a mouse in his lap. "Not now," he said, "I've got work to do." Maybe Lupin was right, he certainly had been agitated. Sirius went outside and readied his motorbike. Lupin didn't know where Peter was hiding, but Sirius did. It was part of the Secret-Keeper arrangement. At any rate, it couldn't hurt to check on Peter. He revved the bike as quietly as he could and raced off into the night.
Lupin was at Dumbledore's side before the noise in Sirius' apartment had faded. Dumbledore, as always, was up and about, milling aimlessly through the Order's headquarters. He glanced up at once as Lupin dusted himself off. "What is it, Remus?"
"Peter. He sent me a message spell. He's in trouble, but I don't have the faintest idea where to look for him. He's supposed to be in hiding. I thought maybe you could help me with that."
Dumbledore sighed. "I'm afraid not. One person can only know so much, Remus."
Lupin swore under his breath. "Tell me one thing, Professor Dumbledore."
The old wizard looked up at him, "What is it?"
"Sirius is still the Potter's Secret-Keeper, isn't he? I mean...," his voice faded out unpleasantly, and Dumbledore himself gulped at the thought.
"As far as I know. James would trust Sirius with his life."
"At least, that's what we're banking on."
Dumbledore smiled faintly, but he was tired, and it showed in his demeanor. "Yes, my lad. It is indeed."
Lupin sighed as he looked out the window. The city of London was so calm at night. It was dark, with a sprinkling of lights throughout the landscape. Overhead, the clouds were filling in, and a light flurry was making its way through the city. "Your word is good enough for me, Dumbledore. I'm off, I shall see if his mother knows anything of his whereabouts. I will find Peter. Though Sirius would abandon him to the vultures, I cannot." he glanced over at Dumbledore, "We were always so unkind to him in grade school, and well, I've always felt a bit guilty about it myself. Not that I would have ever said anything to him then, or now even, but..."
Dumbledore lowered a hand on his shoulder, "I know, Remus. Go on. Find Peter, I'll look over things here, and at your house."
Lupin smiled frailly as he dissaparated with a small pop. Dumbledore sighed as he took over Lupin's spot near the window. He watched as the snowflakes grew in magnitude. How could the world be so beautiful, and yet so corrupted by evil? Many died that night, as many were born. Happiness was mixed with sorrow and despair." And that is one of the mysteries of the world that I will never understand, but must simply accept," said Dumbledore quietly, turning away from the falsely serene picture outside, "I may only play my part."
Snape's face appeared in the fire that was crackled under the stone mantle near the door. "Tonight, Dumbledore. There is to be a meeting, and I suspect a murder."
Dumbledore looked up alertly, "Any idea who?"
Snape shook his greasy head, "None, Professor. I must leave."
Dumbledore nodded, and Snape disappeared from the fireplace. He glanced back outside again. "Such a cold world." he murmured as he prepared to warn Frank Longbottom.
Peter lay quietly inside his hollow tree. The Death Eaters were moving further and further away from him, and he felt slightly relieved. However, at the same time, he was upset. Remus, for all his tales of friendship, had deserted him. Peter had known that Sirius would never come, and James was in hiding, but of all the people to betray him... it had been Remus, the one who had always been kind.
"What kind of friends are they, anyways?" asked his mind.
His fingers squeezed reassuringly around the Snitch that James had given him, "They are good friends."
"Friends? Friends?" inquired his mind indignantly for some of these. "What kind of friends tease you, leave you behind, desert you when you are in need? You've been blind, Peter. Friends are supposed to include you, protect you. They are supposed to want you."
"They do want me, I know it." he mumbled silently. "Look, my Snitch, James gave it to me when he married Lily. I was an usher at his wedding! They were my best friends in school, my very best friends! They always helped me when I didn't understand. I never would have become an Animagus without their help. I probably wouldn't have even graduated."
"Does any of that matter now? They left you, Peter. They were supposed to protect you. But now they have finally left you behind for good. They do not care for you. They're not coming."
To this, Peter's kind heart was silent. They had indeed deserted him to the wolves. A shriek in the forest made him look up. All three Death Eaters had collapsed on the ground, each clutching their arm in pain. As suddenly as it began, it stopped. The three stood, and the leader directed them. "Go to him. I will remain behind, in case Pettigrew is still hiding here. Tell him what we have found."
The other two nodded and dissaparated with two tiny pops. The remaining Death Eater sat upon an old log and looked around, "I know you're out there." he said, his voice as cold as the chill of death, "I know you're hiding. Why? What is there to be gained from refusing him?" Silence answered, and he chuckled cruelly. "His side is the powerful one. Just you wait. You cannot escape us. We've caught you before, and we'll catch you again."
Peter Pettigrew tried to ignore the words of the Death Eater, but they ate away at his heart. Deep inside, he knew that to refuse was to pick the losing side, the dangerous side. But to lose Remus and James as companions...was it worth it?
Lupin apparated in front yard of Peter's mother. He knew better than to appear in her living room. Being a Muggle, and still not quite accustomed to magic, she probably would have struck him over the head with a frying pan. He rang the doorbell, and heard her rushing through the house, trying to look decent before she opened the door. "Who is it?" she rasped.
"My name is Remus Lupin, ma'am. I'm sure you don't remember me, but I..."
"You are a friend of Peter's, he speaks of you often. Yes, yes, come in." she opened the door, and Lupin entered, seating himself in her living room. She was hesitant to look at him. "Its...its not anything bad, is it?" She was clearly frazzled, her short grey hair sticking out at all angles. She was a short, stout woman, much like Peter had been as a child. She even had his watery blue eyes.
Lupin sighed, and a tear trickled down her face. "I knew it." she said quietly.
"Its not that bad, at least, I don't think it is. But I need to find him, he may be in trouble. Do you have any idea where he is?"
She shook her head slowly, "I'm sorry. He wouldn't even tell me. I know that he likes to go for walks in Bellivea Park, but I don't know where he's living. He's supposed to be in hiding."
Lupin frowned. "I suppose that is as good a place as any to begin. Thank you for your time, Mrs. Pettigrew."
She grabbed his hand, "Will you please come back here and give me news of Peter? I don't care if its bad...I, I just can't stand not knowing what is going on. And I couldn't bear to hear it from those horrid ministry wizards... Do you know what the Army is, Remus?" he nodded yes, and she continued, "I feel like I'm going to receive one of those yellow telegrams any moment now. But I'd rather hear it... from his friend. Could you do me that much?"
Remus watched as her eyes filled with tears, and it stirred something deep within him. He nodded and replied, "I can make no promises, but I will try to send you news of Peter one way or another."
"Thank you." she breathed, letting go of him. He strode out the door and mumbled a few quick words, disappearing instantly in the gathering snow. Mrs. Pettigrew stood in the doorway as the winds whipped around her. She looked out into the grey expanse and whispered, "Come back to me, my little lad. Your mother misses you so." She grasped the rosary beads at her neck and turned back into her house. It was beyond her control now.
Peter was fighting himself. Part of him was loyal to the Marauders, but part of him wanted to leave, to join the stronger side. He had learned early on that he needed others to protect him; he was not a good enough wizard to fend for himself. The Snitch struggled madly in his grasp until he finally stuffed it in his pocket. His hands freed, he lowered his head into them. He sat there, crying silently. He cried for his weakness. He never should have betrayed them in the first place.
When Voldemort had found him the first time, he should have run for it, or stood up and died a courageous death. But he was not a courageous person. It was something he had always lacked, and it was why he had hid behind the others in grade school. So, the fool that he was, he gave Voldemort information about the Potter's whereabouts. And Voldemort had come back, again and again. Peter was too scared to stand up to him.
But now Peter had to hide. Now he had their secret...the Potters' secret. He could not, he would not betray them again. Tonight would be the night that he finally faced his fears. The little child, Harry, he could not sacrifice him to Voldemort. No. Tonight was the night...his chest swelled with pride. The Potters had entrusted him with their secret. They valued him, even above Sirius and Remus. The idea of that power sent a surge through his veins. To him it felt like courage, but any idea of that disappeared as people began appearing in the clearing.
His mouth dropped as more and more cloaked men appeared out of the mist. Finally, to his absolute horror, another man, taller than the others, stepped out in front.
"Where are you, Peter?" he hissed softly, "I thought we had an arrangement. I thought you trusted us." His voice rose and fell like that of a snake given the power of speech. It was high for a man's, but at the same time menacing and powerful. His pale face was illuminated by the moonlight. His eyes, two pale brown slits, searched the forest. Finally, his voice softened, "I thought you were our friend, Peter. I thought you meant to join us. We need your powers, Peter. Here you will be appreciated. We will protect you."
Peter's heart warmed instantly. Voldemort's voice persuaded him, prodded him softly to come out. But he hung back. "For James, Sirius, and Remus. For Lily and Harry. I will not desert them. They trust me." He placed his right hand over his heart, "Stay true, Pettigrew." he mumbled to himself.
Voldemort hissed his displeasure, and the other Death Eaters stepped back unconsciously. "Peter, there is no one here for you now," he continued as the softness in his voice was replaced with malcontent, "They have deserted you. Even Remus. Come to us now, or face the consequences. Choose wisely, Peter Pettigrew. Do not throw your life away."
Though it was night, the woods were anything but silent. The old pine trees creaked slowly in the weak wind that gently swayed them back and forth. The snow misted slowly down as the scavenging squirrels ran for cover from the settling cold. It was a chill that froze bones, and even as the animals in the park stored themselves away, a deep fear resided in their hearts. It was a cold that many would not survive. In the morn, they knew that many would fade from the familiar landscape, never to be seen again. Suddenly, the forest quieted in anticipation. Something was coming...
Peter Pettigrew stumbled through the undergrowth, twigs breaking underneath his heavy footfalls as he panted, lost for breath. He was a man just entering his prime, his childhood huskiness finally leaving his body and granting him a slightly sculpted frame. His rich brown hair waved around his pale face as the slight wind rocked him. His watery blue eyes held no vibrancy, however, just confusion and fright.
He fell hard as the wet leaves slid out from under his feet. He crashed into the ground, and his wand bounced out of his grasp. "Noo... ," he moaned, grasping his injured ankle. He lay there, writhing in pain, as something in the woods broke through the trees behind him. Panic overtook him, and ignoring his swelling ankle, he writhed through the leaves, reaching out for his wand. He stood unsteadily and hobbled off into the forest. He vaguely considering becoming a rat, but he knew that if his ankle was broken, the effort of transforming could leave him permanently disfigured. Besides, it wasn't a certainty that he could manage the transformation anyways, and it would leave him without a wand, utterly defenseless.
He mumbled incoherently, trying to recall the spell that Remus had taught him. The sounds behind him grew louder, and he gasped, faltering. But courage and love swelled in his heart and he found a new strength. His pace redoubled, and he finally dove into a hollow tree, gasping for breath. The Message Spell finally came to him, and he whispered "Delivera!". He wand sparked, and he swore quietly. He tried again, and the small blue light flickered and died as soon as it left his wand. More crashing and a few loud swears came from Peter's left, and he held his breath in fright. Three tall men stumbled out of the forest, looking carefully around the clearing as Peter attempted the spell for a third time. The fear they embedded in him worked, and he sent a tiny speck of blue light out into the forest. The Death Eaters did not see the light, however, for they were busy arguing.
"Can't hear him anymore. He's hidden, or apparated. We ought to blast the damn woods apart," said one of men.
The one in the lead spun on him, "No! We have our orders. He is not to be... mishandled. Besides, that dolt can't even transfigure a teapot. If he's apparated, we'll be finding his head 'round the next bend.' "
Peter sat transfixed in his hiding spot. The three men before him were all cloaked in black, their faces hidden from the light. Their identities, however, were not concealed. Even the most junior of wizards could have recognized them. They were on the front cover of the Daily Prophet every morning, and their very names inspired terror. For they were Death Eaters, and they were after Peter. They'd found him taking a midnight walk in the park and chased him down. "Hurry, Remus." he whispered as they spread out and started their search, "Hurry."
A hundred miles away, Remus Lupin awoke with a start. A small blue light prodded him insistently, and he sighed. "Poor Peter. Will he never get the hang of this spell?" he muttered to himself, reaching for his wand. He poked the blue light gently, though he knew that words would probably be too much to expect. In its true form, the small light was to reveal a replica of the sender's face, which delivered a message. Peter, however, simply could not master it. Not that that was unusual, for Peter had trouble with the simplest of spells. The blue light warmed when Lupin's wand touched it, and it exhaled a squeaky breath. "Help!" it cried feebly as it flickered and went out. Lupin reached out for his wizarding robes. It was going to be a long night.
A few minutes later he was dressed and ready to depart. He mumbled a few quick words and apparated in Sirius Black's living room.
"Merlin's beard!" yelled Sirius, diving behind his couch.
Lupin sighed again, "It's only me, Padfoot."
Sirius stood quickly, and dusted himself off. "Do you have any idea what time it is? You're goddamn rude, you are. Apparating into my living room at two in the morning? I could have killed you!"
"As you dove behind your couch, crying out like a small child--" replied Lupin dryly.
"It was a war cry!" countered Sirius. "I have weapons back there, you know!"
Lupin took a quick glance behind the couch. "A cockroach cluster and a feather duster. Now I'm really frightened."
Sirius stretched his arms out, and his back cracked loudly, causing Lupin to wince. "Oh, shut your face. What do you want, anyways?" His face held a shrewd, suspicious look. "Something wrong?"
"Yes, actually. I just received a message from Peter. Something's not right."
Sirius rolled his eyes. "You woke me up for THAT? Oh, for crying out loud. I really should have killed you." He seemed to be forcing a light tone with his sarcasm but the skepticism in his eyes didn't fade.
Noticing this, Lupin's eyes lit up slightly. "No, its for real this time. He sent me a message spell."
Sirius laughed despite himself. "Good joke. What did it do, quack at you? Or did it just wake you up and float away?"
"Sirius...," said Lupin warningly, and Sirius shut up. "There is something wrong. The message squeaked 'help!' before it faded out. He's never been able to do that before. Something's scared him."
Sirius yawned, his face hardening as he truly began to wake up. "Why are you so insistent about this? What do you want with Peter, anyways?"
Finally realizing that the skepticism was not about Peter's cry for help, but about his validity, Lupin threw his hands up in anger, "What is that supposed to mean?"
"I think you already know what I mean, Remus."
"You bastard! What else do I have to do to prove to you that it wasn't me? I had nothing to do with it! Dumbledore believes me. Why won't you?"
"Dumbledore is a trusting dolt sometimes. I don't believe you, Remus. Caradoc Dearborn was with YOU when he vanished. Another comrade of ours gone, and its your fault. What about that time with Lily? I saw you, and on my honor, I never said anything to James, but I can't, I won't, forget it. You betrayed James, Remus. And you forced Lily to betray him too when you kissed her. Now Dumbledore knows that one of the Marauders is feeding Voldemort information. How can I not suspect you? I can't trust you anymore." Sirius' face was sorrowful for a moment before the bitterness overtook it, "For all I know, you're calling you dear little Death Eater friends right now." Lupin stood before him, his anger overcoming all his other emotions. He opened his mouth to speak, but Sirius cut him off. "If you're just going to stand there and rage at me, I suggest you leave. My bed is calling."
Lupin glared at Sirius, "Caradoc had already left my house. I had nothing to do with it, I swear to you. And Lily...it was a mistake. A stupid boyish mistake."
Sirius advanced on him, "Well, your swear isn't worth shit here. Leave."
"And what of Peter? I know there's something wrong. I can feel it. Will you just abandon him, Sirius? He is our friend."
"Well seeing as you'd probably just like to kill him, I wouldn't use the term 'friend' so loosely. I'm sure it's nothing. A bird probably flew into his window and he pissed his pants. Poor stupid arse..." his voice faded out, leaving Lupin to wonder who he was referring to.
"Goddamn you, Sirius!" yelled Lupin as he slammed the nearest thing to him, a transfiguration book, onto the floor. "I'm sick of your excuses about why you shouldn't believe me. I'm going to find him, even if I have to do it alone."
Sirius waved him off, and Lupin dissapparated with an angry bang. Sirius shook his head, and yawning, reached for his wand. A tiny brown owl greeted him and dropped a mouse in his lap. "Not now," he said, "I've got work to do." Maybe Lupin was right, he certainly had been agitated. Sirius went outside and readied his motorbike. Lupin didn't know where Peter was hiding, but Sirius did. It was part of the Secret-Keeper arrangement. At any rate, it couldn't hurt to check on Peter. He revved the bike as quietly as he could and raced off into the night.
Lupin was at Dumbledore's side before the noise in Sirius' apartment had faded. Dumbledore, as always, was up and about, milling aimlessly through the Order's headquarters. He glanced up at once as Lupin dusted himself off. "What is it, Remus?"
"Peter. He sent me a message spell. He's in trouble, but I don't have the faintest idea where to look for him. He's supposed to be in hiding. I thought maybe you could help me with that."
Dumbledore sighed. "I'm afraid not. One person can only know so much, Remus."
Lupin swore under his breath. "Tell me one thing, Professor Dumbledore."
The old wizard looked up at him, "What is it?"
"Sirius is still the Potter's Secret-Keeper, isn't he? I mean...," his voice faded out unpleasantly, and Dumbledore himself gulped at the thought.
"As far as I know. James would trust Sirius with his life."
"At least, that's what we're banking on."
Dumbledore smiled faintly, but he was tired, and it showed in his demeanor. "Yes, my lad. It is indeed."
Lupin sighed as he looked out the window. The city of London was so calm at night. It was dark, with a sprinkling of lights throughout the landscape. Overhead, the clouds were filling in, and a light flurry was making its way through the city. "Your word is good enough for me, Dumbledore. I'm off, I shall see if his mother knows anything of his whereabouts. I will find Peter. Though Sirius would abandon him to the vultures, I cannot." he glanced over at Dumbledore, "We were always so unkind to him in grade school, and well, I've always felt a bit guilty about it myself. Not that I would have ever said anything to him then, or now even, but..."
Dumbledore lowered a hand on his shoulder, "I know, Remus. Go on. Find Peter, I'll look over things here, and at your house."
Lupin smiled frailly as he dissaparated with a small pop. Dumbledore sighed as he took over Lupin's spot near the window. He watched as the snowflakes grew in magnitude. How could the world be so beautiful, and yet so corrupted by evil? Many died that night, as many were born. Happiness was mixed with sorrow and despair." And that is one of the mysteries of the world that I will never understand, but must simply accept," said Dumbledore quietly, turning away from the falsely serene picture outside, "I may only play my part."
Snape's face appeared in the fire that was crackled under the stone mantle near the door. "Tonight, Dumbledore. There is to be a meeting, and I suspect a murder."
Dumbledore looked up alertly, "Any idea who?"
Snape shook his greasy head, "None, Professor. I must leave."
Dumbledore nodded, and Snape disappeared from the fireplace. He glanced back outside again. "Such a cold world." he murmured as he prepared to warn Frank Longbottom.
Peter lay quietly inside his hollow tree. The Death Eaters were moving further and further away from him, and he felt slightly relieved. However, at the same time, he was upset. Remus, for all his tales of friendship, had deserted him. Peter had known that Sirius would never come, and James was in hiding, but of all the people to betray him... it had been Remus, the one who had always been kind.
"What kind of friends are they, anyways?" asked his mind.
His fingers squeezed reassuringly around the Snitch that James had given him, "They are good friends."
"Friends? Friends?" inquired his mind indignantly for some of these. "What kind of friends tease you, leave you behind, desert you when you are in need? You've been blind, Peter. Friends are supposed to include you, protect you. They are supposed to want you."
"They do want me, I know it." he mumbled silently. "Look, my Snitch, James gave it to me when he married Lily. I was an usher at his wedding! They were my best friends in school, my very best friends! They always helped me when I didn't understand. I never would have become an Animagus without their help. I probably wouldn't have even graduated."
"Does any of that matter now? They left you, Peter. They were supposed to protect you. But now they have finally left you behind for good. They do not care for you. They're not coming."
To this, Peter's kind heart was silent. They had indeed deserted him to the wolves. A shriek in the forest made him look up. All three Death Eaters had collapsed on the ground, each clutching their arm in pain. As suddenly as it began, it stopped. The three stood, and the leader directed them. "Go to him. I will remain behind, in case Pettigrew is still hiding here. Tell him what we have found."
The other two nodded and dissaparated with two tiny pops. The remaining Death Eater sat upon an old log and looked around, "I know you're out there." he said, his voice as cold as the chill of death, "I know you're hiding. Why? What is there to be gained from refusing him?" Silence answered, and he chuckled cruelly. "His side is the powerful one. Just you wait. You cannot escape us. We've caught you before, and we'll catch you again."
Peter Pettigrew tried to ignore the words of the Death Eater, but they ate away at his heart. Deep inside, he knew that to refuse was to pick the losing side, the dangerous side. But to lose Remus and James as companions...was it worth it?
Lupin apparated in front yard of Peter's mother. He knew better than to appear in her living room. Being a Muggle, and still not quite accustomed to magic, she probably would have struck him over the head with a frying pan. He rang the doorbell, and heard her rushing through the house, trying to look decent before she opened the door. "Who is it?" she rasped.
"My name is Remus Lupin, ma'am. I'm sure you don't remember me, but I..."
"You are a friend of Peter's, he speaks of you often. Yes, yes, come in." she opened the door, and Lupin entered, seating himself in her living room. She was hesitant to look at him. "Its...its not anything bad, is it?" She was clearly frazzled, her short grey hair sticking out at all angles. She was a short, stout woman, much like Peter had been as a child. She even had his watery blue eyes.
Lupin sighed, and a tear trickled down her face. "I knew it." she said quietly.
"Its not that bad, at least, I don't think it is. But I need to find him, he may be in trouble. Do you have any idea where he is?"
She shook her head slowly, "I'm sorry. He wouldn't even tell me. I know that he likes to go for walks in Bellivea Park, but I don't know where he's living. He's supposed to be in hiding."
Lupin frowned. "I suppose that is as good a place as any to begin. Thank you for your time, Mrs. Pettigrew."
She grabbed his hand, "Will you please come back here and give me news of Peter? I don't care if its bad...I, I just can't stand not knowing what is going on. And I couldn't bear to hear it from those horrid ministry wizards... Do you know what the Army is, Remus?" he nodded yes, and she continued, "I feel like I'm going to receive one of those yellow telegrams any moment now. But I'd rather hear it... from his friend. Could you do me that much?"
Remus watched as her eyes filled with tears, and it stirred something deep within him. He nodded and replied, "I can make no promises, but I will try to send you news of Peter one way or another."
"Thank you." she breathed, letting go of him. He strode out the door and mumbled a few quick words, disappearing instantly in the gathering snow. Mrs. Pettigrew stood in the doorway as the winds whipped around her. She looked out into the grey expanse and whispered, "Come back to me, my little lad. Your mother misses you so." She grasped the rosary beads at her neck and turned back into her house. It was beyond her control now.
Peter was fighting himself. Part of him was loyal to the Marauders, but part of him wanted to leave, to join the stronger side. He had learned early on that he needed others to protect him; he was not a good enough wizard to fend for himself. The Snitch struggled madly in his grasp until he finally stuffed it in his pocket. His hands freed, he lowered his head into them. He sat there, crying silently. He cried for his weakness. He never should have betrayed them in the first place.
When Voldemort had found him the first time, he should have run for it, or stood up and died a courageous death. But he was not a courageous person. It was something he had always lacked, and it was why he had hid behind the others in grade school. So, the fool that he was, he gave Voldemort information about the Potter's whereabouts. And Voldemort had come back, again and again. Peter was too scared to stand up to him.
But now Peter had to hide. Now he had their secret...the Potters' secret. He could not, he would not betray them again. Tonight would be the night that he finally faced his fears. The little child, Harry, he could not sacrifice him to Voldemort. No. Tonight was the night...his chest swelled with pride. The Potters had entrusted him with their secret. They valued him, even above Sirius and Remus. The idea of that power sent a surge through his veins. To him it felt like courage, but any idea of that disappeared as people began appearing in the clearing.
His mouth dropped as more and more cloaked men appeared out of the mist. Finally, to his absolute horror, another man, taller than the others, stepped out in front.
"Where are you, Peter?" he hissed softly, "I thought we had an arrangement. I thought you trusted us." His voice rose and fell like that of a snake given the power of speech. It was high for a man's, but at the same time menacing and powerful. His pale face was illuminated by the moonlight. His eyes, two pale brown slits, searched the forest. Finally, his voice softened, "I thought you were our friend, Peter. I thought you meant to join us. We need your powers, Peter. Here you will be appreciated. We will protect you."
Peter's heart warmed instantly. Voldemort's voice persuaded him, prodded him softly to come out. But he hung back. "For James, Sirius, and Remus. For Lily and Harry. I will not desert them. They trust me." He placed his right hand over his heart, "Stay true, Pettigrew." he mumbled to himself.
Voldemort hissed his displeasure, and the other Death Eaters stepped back unconsciously. "Peter, there is no one here for you now," he continued as the softness in his voice was replaced with malcontent, "They have deserted you. Even Remus. Come to us now, or face the consequences. Choose wisely, Peter Pettigrew. Do not throw your life away."
To be continued…..
A/N: Caradoc is an actual character who was mentioned as an original Phoenix member (in the 5th book) who "mysteriously disappeared". The "scene" between Lupin and Lily came about as a result of Duskrider Q's ingenuity…it was her who noticed that Lupin seemed to be too fond of Lily in the 3rd movie, and I played off that idea.