Trip to Hogwarts
::::::: It is the year 2002. Dr. Evil and all the other evil people are in the Secret Volcano Lair, and they got mail.:::::::::::
SCOTT: Mail? Who would send us mail?
MINI ME: :::learned how to talk::: Anyone who saw the movie.
MAIL PERSON: Um.... ::in a quivering voice:: you got mail, Mr. Evil sir.
DR. EVIL: It's DR. Evil! DR. EVIL! NOT MR. EVIL!
MAIL PERSON: Right... well, I guess I'll leave now... OW!!!!!
DR. EVIL: NO, Mr. Bigglesworth! Don't bite the mailman!
BIGGLESWORTH: MEOW!!!!!
DR. EVIL: ...what?
BIGGLESWORTH: MEOW!!!!!
DR. EVIL: ... he... doesn't... like... cats? Oh, I don't care what happens to him. Number Two, please feed him to the mutated sea bass!
NUMBER TWO: Um... Dr. Evil... The mutated sea bass have died because of ultra-violet rays.
MINI ME: That's a lie! Fat Bastard ate them all!
FAT BASTARD: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO- okay, maybe I did.
DR. EVIL: Then throw him in the lava thingie that Austin Powers almost died in.
MAIL PERSON: NOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :::::::::sizzles in the lava thingie Austin Powers almost died in::::::::::::::
DR. EVIL: As I have said before....... when I get angry, Mr. Bigglesworth gets upset... and when Mr. Bigglesworth gets upset, PEOPLE DIE!!!
SCOTT: ......well?
DR. EVIL: Well what?
SCOTT: Read the letter, stupid!
DR. EVIL: Um.... Mustafa?
MUSTAFA: what?
SCOTT: Can you read it?
MUSTAFA: NEVER!
SCOTT: Mustafa.... can you read the letter.
MUSTAFA: NOOOO!!!!!!
SCOTT: Okay.... Mustafa...... CAN YOU READ THE STUPID LETTER!!!!!!!
MUSTAFA: Okay.
MINI ME: Stupid. He only answers questions after you ask them three times! Don't you remember from the second movie?
SCOTT: Ooops...
MINI ME: ::::::reading Cracked magazine::::::: Hey, they called you Snott!! HA!
SCOTT: Yeah, and I hope you're happy with the name Mini-Mush.
MINI ME: IT'S NOT MY FAULT MR. BIGGLESWORTH ATE ME IN THAT COMIC!!!!!
SCOTT: YEAH IT IS! IT'S BECAUSE YOU'RE A LITTLE PERSON!!!!!!
NUMBER TWO: That's enough! That's enough!!!
MUSTAFA: This letter...... says something about a school.
DR. EVIL: A school? WHAT school? An evil school?
SCOTT: Ugh.
MUSTAFA: Called Hog-Warts or something.
MINI ME: Ha! Fat Bastard would fit right in!
FAT BASTARD: HEY!!!!!!!!!!
MUSTAFA: It says we're invited there for a year... to do magic..... with the other students.
DR. EVIL: MWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! EVIL IS THE GREATEST MAGIC OF THEM ALL!!!!!! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
FRAU: MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!
NUMBER TWO: So... are we going?
DR. EVIL: YES! Everyone in the spaceship!
NUMBER TWO: You mean the one that looks like a giant........
:::::::In a different place or something:::::::::
NICK: Dick! Get over here! And bring the baseball with you!
DICK: I hate having you as an older brother, Nick.
::::::Back to the headquarters::::::::
DR. EVIL: Yeah, that spaceship, stupid! Get in.... let's just hope there's enough room.....
MINI ME: Does Fat Bastard have to come?
DR. EVIL: Unfortunetly yes.
MINI ME: Then I'm gonna bring a barf bag.
DR. EVIL: EVERYONE INSIDE! Five seconds to blast-off.
FRAU: FIVE!!!!!!!!!! FOUR!!!!!!!!!!!!! THREE!!!!!!!!!!!!!! TWO!!!!!!!! ONE!!!!!!!!! BLAST-OFF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
:::::The trip is smooth so far, until.........:::::::::
SCOTT: Hey...... what's that smell?
MINI ME: Oh no....... ::::uses barf bag:::::
SCOTT: Fat Bastard, did you-
FAT BASTARD: HEY, WHAT HAPPENED TO INNOCENT 'TILL PROVEN GUILTY?!?
MINI ME: Since when have YOU been innocent?
DR. EVIL: There are oxygen masks in here, thank God.
MINI ME: We're gonna land soon.... I can't believe Fat Bastard did that HERE, of all places..........
NUMBER TWO: It's because he ate the mutated sea bass.
FAT BASTARD: Was not!!!
MUSTAFA: Uh-oh...................
MINI ME: It's gonna happen again.
MUSTAFA Uh-oh....................
SCOTT: What?
MINI ME: Mustafa's claustrophobic.
MUSTAFA: LEMME OUT OF HERE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
MINI ME: CALM DOWN, STUPID! WE'RE ALMOST THERE!
MUSTAFA: I'M GONNA FAINT.... OH.... NO.......
SCOTT: We landed! Get up!
MUSTAFA: :::::fainted::::::
DR. EVIL: ::::puts on oxygen mask and holds extremely long tweezers:::: Fat Bastard, give me one of your socks.
FAT BASTARD: Why?
DR. EVIL: DO NOT QUESTION MY SUPERIORITY!
FAT BASTARD: FINE!! ::::gives him sock, and everyone barfs::::
FAT BASTARD: WHAT'S WRONG WITH MY SOCK???!!!???
MINI ME: IT SMELLS LIKE ROTTEN SARDINES, THAT'S WHAT!
FAT BASTARD: You're just saying that.
MINI ME: There's a river in Egypt called The Nile, and you're up in it to your neck!
FAT BASTARD: .......Huh?
NUMBER TWO: He means "denial," genius.
DR. EVIL: Quiet. :::::puts sock to Mustafa's nose::::::
MINI ME: Not so close. It might kill him.
DR. EVIL: Like I care. ::::::Mustafa gets up:::::::
MUSTAFA: What smells like sardines? ::::sees sock:::: I LOVE SARDINES! Especially when they get all squishy.
MINI ME: That is Fat Bastard's sock, you lunatic!
MUSTAFA: Can I keep it?
FAT BASTARD: NO! It's mine!
::::::They fight over the sock for a while, but Fat Bastard squishes him::::::
DR. EVIL: Oh great. He fainted again.
------------------------------------------------------
to be continued..............
Are they going to Hogwarts? Should I write another chapter to this lunacy which I call fanfiction? Tell me in a review!
::::::: It is the year 2002. Dr. Evil and all the other evil people are in the Secret Volcano Lair, and they got mail.:::::::::::
SCOTT: Mail? Who would send us mail?
MINI ME: :::learned how to talk::: Anyone who saw the movie.
MAIL PERSON: Um.... ::in a quivering voice:: you got mail, Mr. Evil sir.
DR. EVIL: It's DR. Evil! DR. EVIL! NOT MR. EVIL!
MAIL PERSON: Right... well, I guess I'll leave now... OW!!!!!
DR. EVIL: NO, Mr. Bigglesworth! Don't bite the mailman!
BIGGLESWORTH: MEOW!!!!!
DR. EVIL: ...what?
BIGGLESWORTH: MEOW!!!!!
DR. EVIL: ... he... doesn't... like... cats? Oh, I don't care what happens to him. Number Two, please feed him to the mutated sea bass!
NUMBER TWO: Um... Dr. Evil... The mutated sea bass have died because of ultra-violet rays.
MINI ME: That's a lie! Fat Bastard ate them all!
FAT BASTARD: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO- okay, maybe I did.
DR. EVIL: Then throw him in the lava thingie that Austin Powers almost died in.
MAIL PERSON: NOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :::::::::sizzles in the lava thingie Austin Powers almost died in::::::::::::::
DR. EVIL: As I have said before....... when I get angry, Mr. Bigglesworth gets upset... and when Mr. Bigglesworth gets upset, PEOPLE DIE!!!
SCOTT: ......well?
DR. EVIL: Well what?
SCOTT: Read the letter, stupid!
DR. EVIL: Um.... Mustafa?
MUSTAFA: what?
SCOTT: Can you read it?
MUSTAFA: NEVER!
SCOTT: Mustafa.... can you read the letter.
MUSTAFA: NOOOO!!!!!!
SCOTT: Okay.... Mustafa...... CAN YOU READ THE STUPID LETTER!!!!!!!
MUSTAFA: Okay.
MINI ME: Stupid. He only answers questions after you ask them three times! Don't you remember from the second movie?
SCOTT: Ooops...
MINI ME: ::::::reading Cracked magazine::::::: Hey, they called you Snott!! HA!
SCOTT: Yeah, and I hope you're happy with the name Mini-Mush.
MINI ME: IT'S NOT MY FAULT MR. BIGGLESWORTH ATE ME IN THAT COMIC!!!!!
SCOTT: YEAH IT IS! IT'S BECAUSE YOU'RE A LITTLE PERSON!!!!!!
NUMBER TWO: That's enough! That's enough!!!
MUSTAFA: This letter...... says something about a school.
DR. EVIL: A school? WHAT school? An evil school?
SCOTT: Ugh.
MUSTAFA: Called Hog-Warts or something.
MINI ME: Ha! Fat Bastard would fit right in!
FAT BASTARD: HEY!!!!!!!!!!
MUSTAFA: It says we're invited there for a year... to do magic..... with the other students.
DR. EVIL: MWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! EVIL IS THE GREATEST MAGIC OF THEM ALL!!!!!! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
FRAU: MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!
NUMBER TWO: So... are we going?
DR. EVIL: YES! Everyone in the spaceship!
NUMBER TWO: You mean the one that looks like a giant........
:::::::In a different place or something:::::::::
NICK: Dick! Get over here! And bring the baseball with you!
DICK: I hate having you as an older brother, Nick.
::::::Back to the headquarters::::::::
DR. EVIL: Yeah, that spaceship, stupid! Get in.... let's just hope there's enough room.....
MINI ME: Does Fat Bastard have to come?
DR. EVIL: Unfortunetly yes.
MINI ME: Then I'm gonna bring a barf bag.
DR. EVIL: EVERYONE INSIDE! Five seconds to blast-off.
FRAU: FIVE!!!!!!!!!! FOUR!!!!!!!!!!!!! THREE!!!!!!!!!!!!!! TWO!!!!!!!! ONE!!!!!!!!! BLAST-OFF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
:::::The trip is smooth so far, until.........:::::::::
SCOTT: Hey...... what's that smell?
MINI ME: Oh no....... ::::uses barf bag:::::
SCOTT: Fat Bastard, did you-
FAT BASTARD: HEY, WHAT HAPPENED TO INNOCENT 'TILL PROVEN GUILTY?!?
MINI ME: Since when have YOU been innocent?
DR. EVIL: There are oxygen masks in here, thank God.
MINI ME: We're gonna land soon.... I can't believe Fat Bastard did that HERE, of all places..........
NUMBER TWO: It's because he ate the mutated sea bass.
FAT BASTARD: Was not!!!
MUSTAFA: Uh-oh...................
MINI ME: It's gonna happen again.
MUSTAFA Uh-oh....................
SCOTT: What?
MINI ME: Mustafa's claustrophobic.
MUSTAFA: LEMME OUT OF HERE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
MINI ME: CALM DOWN, STUPID! WE'RE ALMOST THERE!
MUSTAFA: I'M GONNA FAINT.... OH.... NO.......
SCOTT: We landed! Get up!
MUSTAFA: :::::fainted::::::
DR. EVIL: ::::puts on oxygen mask and holds extremely long tweezers:::: Fat Bastard, give me one of your socks.
FAT BASTARD: Why?
DR. EVIL: DO NOT QUESTION MY SUPERIORITY!
FAT BASTARD: FINE!! ::::gives him sock, and everyone barfs::::
FAT BASTARD: WHAT'S WRONG WITH MY SOCK???!!!???
MINI ME: IT SMELLS LIKE ROTTEN SARDINES, THAT'S WHAT!
FAT BASTARD: You're just saying that.
MINI ME: There's a river in Egypt called The Nile, and you're up in it to your neck!
FAT BASTARD: .......Huh?
NUMBER TWO: He means "denial," genius.
DR. EVIL: Quiet. :::::puts sock to Mustafa's nose::::::
MINI ME: Not so close. It might kill him.
DR. EVIL: Like I care. ::::::Mustafa gets up:::::::
MUSTAFA: What smells like sardines? ::::sees sock:::: I LOVE SARDINES! Especially when they get all squishy.
MINI ME: That is Fat Bastard's sock, you lunatic!
MUSTAFA: Can I keep it?
FAT BASTARD: NO! It's mine!
::::::They fight over the sock for a while, but Fat Bastard squishes him::::::
DR. EVIL: Oh great. He fainted again.
------------------------------------------------------
to be continued..............
Are they going to Hogwarts? Should I write another chapter to this lunacy which I call fanfiction? Tell me in a review!