Cara gets out the taxi and looks up at the hospital, not a lot had changed since she was last here, ambulances coming in and out, the faint chattering of nurses and doctors on breaks and cars driving by the hospital. "That's £8 dear" The taxi driver says as he puts all her belonging down on the side of the pavement for her.
Cara finds the money out of her purse and hands it over before grabbing her belongings, she sighs as she puts her purse away with her free hand and then looks at the toddler which she holds. "Right you best behaviour please" She smiles as she kisses the little girls head.
She grabs hold of Cara's hair and gives it a tug and smiles cheekily at her, "Right Darlings lets go see some old friends of Mummy's" Cara smiles as she grabs her small suitcase and the pram.
With her free hand she manages to find out a spare staff pass she had from the last time she was here, Cara had kept it because she had somehow managed to get Raf's ID card stuck in the back of her card holder.
After a brief check over with security they allow her into the hospital. She decides then to sit on the café as its rather busy, Cara opens up the pram and sits her little girl down in the pram and gets her phone out and texts Raf 'Come to pulses, got you a surprise delivered, x' She sits there quietly watching her daughter waiting for Raf.
She finds it rather odd how he hasn't replied to her at all, so she instantly thinks he's in theatre being the absolute hero he has always been and has told her daughter about. "Not long down sweetie" Cara beams at her daughter which instantly sparks a smile back from her too.
Half an hour passes and Cara decides to text Raf again 'Hi Raf, It's Cara… I'm not winding you up. There is something for you to see in reception, please come down x' Cara sends and places her phone down on the table and then picks her daughter out of the pram and sits her on her knee.
"Shh, its okay…" She soothes as the bounces her daughter gently on her knee. She looks around the café not many faces that she recognises anymore so she looks back down at her daughter.
"Cara?" She hears a voice call, her heart starts to flutter and she turns around and scans the room. Her nerves fly sky high and then she turns to see Essie. Her heart sinks and she cuddles her daughter a little more.
"Essie?" Cara replies.
"What are you doing here, I thought you was in Belfast?" Essie questions curiously as she's notices the little girl sat on Cara's lap attempting to eat Cara's fingers.
"I'm… here because… I left my job in Belfast… I missed Holby" She replies trying to shake Essie off her shoulder.
Essie thinks for a moment before taking a seat next to Cara, she smiles at the little girl, "She yours?" She questions Cara again.
"Yes, she's mine" Cara smiles and keeps scanning the room which Essie starts to notice as she's not paying much attention to Essie.
"Are you waiting for someone?" Essie questions again. Cara nods and kisses her daughters head again and doesn't say anything as she wants to speak with Raf before anyone else. Essie tries to change the subject to try and attract Cara's attention "So what's the little one's name?" Essie asks Cara.
"Sienna" Cara replies as she finally makes eye contact with Essie, "Where's Raf? I mean I know he's usually busy but I've been texting him" Cara replies and Essie's facial expression drops.
"How old is she?" Essie asks as she realises what is possibly going on.
"Nine months… I mean she's hardly a toddler yet but she's so bright for her age, just like her Dad" Cara smiles in a little day dream of her own. "1st March 2017" Cara automatically reels off. Essie just nods hoping she can speak at some point "Anyway where is Raf" Cara questions.
Essie takes a deep breath in "He's gone Cara" She replies simply trying to hold herself together.
"Gone home? Okay that's fine… he's probably asleep" Cara laughs reassuring herself.
"No, Cara… where have you been these past few weeks?" Essie asks as she notices a newspaper nearby with Raf's face on it.
She looks at Cara and waits for an answer "Well I've been in Belfast… but I flew out here this morning" Cara replies as she changes what knee Sienna is sitting on.
"Haven't you seen the news… or the papers?" Essie questions and Cara shakes her head and looks at Essie confused. "Raf, he loved you… spoke nothing more but about you, even when I got married to him he spoke so fondly of you, but a baby… why didn't you tell him? Cara, Raf was a hero you know that right?" Essie asks and Cara nods.
"Essie where are you going with this… where is he?" Cara asks as her breathing becomes rather erratic.
"Oh Cara. I don't know any other way to put it but…he… was shot, in the jugular. He… didn't survive" Essie says and Cara bites her lip and starts to go red before she bursts out crying.
"Cara I'm so sorry" Essie says as she stands and attempts to hug Cara but she pushes her away.
Cara kisses her daughters head lightly and cuddles her, "Cara please, I'm so sorry. But why didn't you tell him he was a dad? He'd have been in his element" Essie admits and Cara just cries with no reply from her.
"Why didn't you tell me!" Cara cries loudly which catches the attention of Fletch who is just coming onto his lunch break.
He walks over to them and looks at Cara "Well if it isn't Cara Martinez" Fletch smiles trying to see if Cara will smile back up at him.
"Fletch, now's not the time" Essie replies and places a friendly hand on Cara's knee, Sienna leans forwards and pats Essie's arm and smiles. Fletch grabs a few napkins to use as tissues and passes them to Cara and Essie takes Sienna off her.
Fletch leans forwards and hugs Cara and she grabs his scrub top and cries hysterically into the top "Fletch… he's gone" she cries into his chest.
Fletch soothes her and rubs her back "I know Cara; I know" He says hugging her lightly. Essie stands up with Sienna and let's Fletch sit down.
Essie smiles a little at Sienna as she can defiantly see Raf in Sienna "May I take her onto the ward, show everyone? She's such a sweetie" Essie smiles and Cara just nods as she tries to control her emotions.