"Kurt! Will you just listen to me for a second?"
When Kurt had stormed out of the living room Blaine had hurried after, leaving Burt and Finn to sit waiting.
"No, Blaine, I will not. If you don't like the clothes that I like that's fine by me, but it's not like I'm forcing you to wear it." He stopped for a bit, and in a second he looked as though he had just had a horrible epiphany.
"Is it… is it because you're…" He had to stop to collect his thoughts before he could utter the words out loud.
"Are you embarrassed about what I wear?" Kurt was even paler than he used to be. He looked as though he had been slapped in the face.
"No. No… God no! How could you even think that?" Blaine took a step closer to the boy in front of him. He looked so young and innocent, so much to learn about real life.
"Kurt. You're my boyfriend. You're the best thing in the world to me." Blaine fought really hard to catch Kurt's eyes, but they were just flickering around his room.
Blaine faced that this was gonna be a tougher conversation than he first presumed, so he grabbed Kurt by the arm and got him to sit down next to him, as Blaine himself sat down on the bed.
"I want you to look at me, and I want you to listen very carefully to what I am telling you right now."
Kurt faced him reluctantly, his mouth pouting and his chin a little higher than usual. It was hard to decide whether he was more mad or hurt.
Whether it was one or the other Kurt faced Blaine as requested.
Blaine looked down and grabbed Kurt's hand and closed his own around it. Then he looked up and kept Kurt's eyes in a firm look. He wanted to make sure that he understood every single word.
"Do you remember when we first met? You were walking around Dalton in your designer clothes, your face hidden behind your designer sunglasses." Blaine smiled at the thought. He would never forget that moment, he was sure of it.
"When I saw you I immediately knew that you were special.
Not because everybody was wearing uniforms, and you weren't; but because you were wearing clothes like nobody I had ever seen before. You wore it with confidence, with style." Kurt's hand was starting to get clammy, but Blaine's hand was locked tightly around it.
"And that is the boy that I got to know. That is the boy that I am head over heels for."
Blaine looked down at their hands, and let his thumb caress Kurt's before he continued.
He smiled to himself and gave a short laughter.
"It's true that some times I find your choice of outfits a bit eccentric; but that's a part of who you are. It's a package deal that I will gladly invest in. Because if you changed you wouldn't be you anymore, and then I would miss that part of you that had gone missing."
Kurt had completely forgotten to keep his lips pouted, and his eyes were wide and filled with stars, but the sadness was still there behind them.
He started to open his mouth to speak, but Blaine stopped him before he got a word out.
"Please, let me finish before my words get lost. This is really important to me. For us."
Kurt closed his mouth, and shifted to an anticipating expression.
"What I am trying to tell you is that…" The Warbler paused to make sure he chose his words right. He didn't want to say something wrong. Again.
"I really admire you for being so honest and proud of who you are. You just need to understand that I am not like you; I'm scared because of who I am."
Kurt's face filled a sense of pity. He didn't want Blaine to go around being scared.
"Please don't look at me like that." He did a screwed up face. It was very clear that he was ashamed to admit his constant fear. It didn't make it easier that Kurt sat there looking like a puppy who had just seen his mom get run over. He was getting sidetracked.
"Now, I am not telling you to be scared in any way. It would break my heart to see you living in constant fear, always looking over your shoulder."
Blaine closed his eyes for a few seconds, as if he were trying to forget a very painful memory.
He shook his head lightly as if it would make it go away, but he kept that pained expression on his face.
"I want you to be proud of who you are. I am proud of who you are. And I do think that it's cool that you are brave enough to want to wear that kilt to your prom. But you need to understand my motive about this. Understand where I'm coming from, and from what perspective I am seeing this." He paused, and then decided that he had to close the deal soon, or else Kurt would stop listening.
"The thing that haunts me the most here is what will happen to you if you show in that."
Blaine took a deep breathe as he looked Kurt directly in the eyes.
"I just can't let the thing that happened to me happen to you. And I am afraid that it is the risk you're taking by wearing that kilt. Karofsky is not the only bully at that school, you know that. And people drink before they go to that kind of stuff. Who knows what could trigger some ignorant homophobe?"
Kurt was speechless. His words failed him. Never had anyone tried to protect him like that. Which made it even worse in some way.
"I just don't want to see you get hurt. In any way." Blaine squeezed Kurt's hand so hard that he almost couldn't feel his fingertips.
"Blaine… I…" How was he ever going to say this? All of these feelings that were stumbling over each other inside of him weren't making it any easier to focus on the main conversation.
"I honestly don't know what to say right now." He looked away. He couldn't stand looking at him right now. How did he deserve a guy like this?
"You don't have to say anything. Just.. Let me protect you. Please." Blaine's voice was pleading, and his eyebrows furrowed in the middle of his forehead, the way they always did when he was having an internal struggle.
Kurt moved a little at his seat on the bed. He turned his torso more in the direction of Blaine, so he could get both of his hands without breaking his back trying to.
"Blaine, I… I really appreciate how you feel about this. Don't ever think that I am not thankful for you. I am. I have no idea what I have done to deserve a guy like you." He paused to gather himself to say the words he were trying to avoid, because he knew how much they would hurt the guy he was nuts about.
"I'm sorry, but… I'm not giving up the kilt." He waited to see Blaine's reaction. But he had no idea what was going behind those dark brown eyes.
"I am not gonna let them dictate what I wear just because they are a bunch of idiots. If I don't wear this kilt I might as well throw in the towel and wave a white flag." He was still waiting for a reaction, but the only thing that was moving was Blaine's eyes. They looked away from Kurt now. Down in the floor.
"Don't you see that if I go wearing the same as everybody else they have won? Then they will have completely out powered me and taken myself away from me?"
Blaine looked more and more as if he was in tremendous inner pains.
"Then wear the kilt." He still didn't look at Kurt, which was killing Kurt. Why wouldn't he look at him?
"What do you mean: wear the kilt?" Kurt asked the question in a confused tone - as if there was something he was missing. But then Blaine looked up at him, directly in the eye. His dark, chocolate eyes were glistening in the dim lighting, and his brows were still furrowed, and his forehead was still in lines. Then he let his fingers link with Kurt's and faked a smile for him.
"I mean: if you really want to wear the kilt so badly, then do it. I will stand by you no matter what you wear." Kurt knew that it was true, but he also knew that the smile was fake, and there was no way in hell that Blaine was the tiniest bit comfortable about this.
"But… you will still go with me, won't you?" He was a bit insecure about the last part. He couldn't imagine Blaine ditching in any way - he just needed to hear him say.
"Of course I will. I promised you, didn't I?" This time the smile didn't look as forced, which was really comforting.
Kurt stood up, and took another spin in front of Blaine, his smile stretching all over his face.
He got dizzy, and trembled and landed on top of Blaine who just in the right second reached out his hands to catch him.
Blaine was on his back on the bed, and Kurt was lying on top of him, one leg between Blaine's, the other one on the side.
"I gotta admit though, that when we're here alone, I am pretty happy about that kilt." Blaine's voice was a little thick, and he smiled all over his face, a little tint of red behind the skin of his cheeks.
Kurt moved his leg so it rubbed against Blaine's thighs, and giggled by Blaine's reaction.
"I do like it too." He said it in a teasing voice.
Then Blaine got his grips together, and let a hand run up Kurt's thigh, under the kilt to reach his butt, where he took a firm grip, that made Kurt bust out a squealing sound.
Then Blaine stretched up his neck to place a soft kiss on Kurt's lips.
"No matter what happens, I want you to know that I don't ever wanna lose you." With those words they rolled on to the side for Blaine to place his right hand on the leg that Kurt still had lying on Blaine's, as Kurt let his head sneak into the hollow spot between Blaine's head and his chest.
Kurt really did feel safe lying there with him, as if the world didn't existed.