The Name of the Man/Girl

SIRIUS: Moony, old pal
We've seen your face
We know a girl stole your heart
Lately your mind's
In outer space
Now, look, you're starting to smart

HERMIONE: It's not an impossible task
To see why you're glowing
Obviously, you have fallen in love
'Cause your grin now keeps growing

MEN: So we wanna know
What's the name of the girl?
Why is this such a big secret?

GIRLS: What's the name of the man?
What is he like? When have you met?

MEN: Tell us please 'cause we have to know

GIRLS: Until you tell us, we won't let you go

TONKS: I'm in love with him

REMUS: I'm in love with her

TONKS: He's a real nice guy

REMUS: She is such a lovely girl

TONKS: But I can't tell him

REMUS: She won't understand

GIRLS: So tell us instead

MEN: Maybe we can lend a hand

BOTH: We can set you two up
So we wanna know

GIRLS:The name of the guy

HERMIONE: I'm sure that it's not a big deal
Why is this such a big secret?

SIRIUS: She may feel the same way you feel
You don't know for sure

MEN: What's the name of the girl?

HERMIONE: You can't keep this from us all your life
What is he like? When have you met?

GIRLS: Tell us please 'cause we have to know

MEN: Until you tell us, we won't let you go

REMUS: She makes my heart stop

TONKS: He makes my knees weak

REMUS: She makes my jaw drop

TONKS: He makes me stammer like a freak

REMUS: She's so beautiful

TONKS: Oh, he looks so fine

REMUS: But I'd be a fool

TONKS: If I thought he could be mine

BOTH: We can set you two up
So we wanna know
Oh, yes, we wanna know
The name of the man/girl

As both groups sing this, they wander into the kitchen without noticing each other. Suddenly, Tonks and Remus bump into each other and both of them turn fire-engine red. The two groups stop singing and everyone runs off somewhere, except for Remus and Tonks who gaze at each other, looking completely puzzled.

OK, I hope the ending wasn't too lame. Review please: I'm interested in how you like the song.